Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Admit Guilt
• Part 2 of 3: Take responsibility
• Part 3 of 3: Learn from your mistakes

You have this awful feeling inside every time you realize that your actions have negatively affected someone else. To make amends, you need to be willing to deal with the consequences, apologize, and move on. These steps can be just as helpful for technical mistakes at work as for personal abuse. Ability to deal with mistakes is one of the most significant opportunities for personal growth.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Admit Guilt

1. 1 Admit that you did something wrong. Resist the urge to bury the secret. To admit your mistake, you need to be a stronger person than to ignore it.
2. 2 Think about the immediate and long-term consequences of your actions. Many children are told, "Think about what you have done." Adults should also think about and understand who they have harmed, and in some cases it may even be several people.
3. 3 Think about the timing. If there are future consequences of doing the wrong thing, you should try to fix the situation before it gets out of hand. On the other hand, waiting for some time may be the right decision in cases where confrontation can offend a person, and a cool head will help you achieve your goal.
4. 4 Think about the reasons why you acted this way and which caused you to behave this way. This is not making excuses, but rather a way to help you avoid similar behavior in the future.

Part 2 of 3: Take responsibility

1. 1 Don't blame others. Naturally, everyone wants to put the blame on the other. However, accepting full responsibility can be the cleanest and easiest way to make amends.
2. 2 Don't be defensive or make excuses. Similar to accusations, excuses for offense can make the victim feel like you are trying to dodge the apology.
3. 3 Apologize for your actions directly and sincerely. Explain to the person that you admit what you did wrong and that you regret this behavior.
4. 4 Let the person ask you questions. Give the person the opportunity to ask why, or to say something about how you hurt them. Try not to get defensive, even if the person responds emotionally.
   • Keep in mind that while you may have prepared with an apology, the person may not have prepared with an answer. Emotional reactions to resentment are completely normal.
5. 5 Don't ask for forgiveness. Apology is for you, forgiveness is for the offended. It must come at a time and when a person is ready to forgive.
6. 6 Repeat these steps with other people you may have offended. You should try to apologize to everyone who has been hurt directly or even indirectly.

Part 3 of 3: Learn from your mistakes

1. 1 Think a little about your feelings. Allow yourself to feel guilty or sad. The confrontation was most likely very difficult for you as well.
2. 2 Think about what you have learned from this experience. Make any changes to your behavior to avoid this situation in the future.
3. 3 Talk to someone about the process you went through. This can be an emotional period for you. Talking to a friend or therapist can be helpful.
4. 4 Move on. As you complete these steps, accept what you have learned and understand that in the future you will be able to approach such situations more maturely and with more experience.
5. 5 Don't feel guilty after taking these steps to make amends. Worrying about things outside of your control will likely only harm you after the offended person forgives and forgets. Repeat the motto “No one is perfect”.