Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: How to Prevent Conflicts
• Method 2 of 3: How to Resolve Conflicts
• Method 3 of 3: How to Maintain a Good Relationship
• Tips
• Warnings

Conflict between siblings is unfortunately inevitable. If you also often quarrel with your brother or sister, then this article is for you. After reading it, you will learn how to stop feuding with your loved one. You will find helpful tips on how to behave properly before, during and after an argument. With a little effort, you can become true friends with your brother or sister.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: How to Prevent Conflicts

1. 1 Put yourself in the shoes of your brother or sister when they upset you. Before starting an argument, consider why your sister is in a bad mood. Ask yourself if you could have done something that upset your brother. Perhaps your relative's bad mood has nothing to do with your actions. However, you may have done something that hurt the feelings of your brother or sister. You might not even have paid attention to it. Understanding the feelings of a brother or sister can help prevent an argument.
2. 2 Talk to your brother or sister about what is upsetting you in your relationship. Try starting a conversation so your family member understands why you are upset. Speak calmly and with respect. Don't raise your tone of voice. Listen carefully when a brother or sister expresses his thoughts and feelings. Give your loved one an opportunity to express their feelings.
   • If your sister is telling you something, pay attention to her, not the TV or cell phone. Thanks to this, she will understand that you care what happens to her.
   • Try not to bring up topics that could trigger a conflict. For example, don't mention your brother's report card or your sister's stupid boyfriend.
3. 3 Make a plan to help you prevent future conflict situations. After discussing what upsets you, be sure to show your brother or sister that you love them. Next, make a plan to help you reduce fights and conflict situations. Think over several options and discuss them with your brother or sister.
   • You may decide to take turns choosing a TV program to watch. It is best if you draw up the contract in writing.
   • If you have any confusion about using the bathroom, invite your brother to shower in the evening, which you can do in the morning before school.If he refuses your offer, you might want to shower in the evening or wake up 15 minutes earlier.
4. 4 Pause and take it easy to avoid aggravating the situation if you feel yourself getting very annoyed. Calm down by taking a few deep breaths or counting to ten. This will help you stay calm. If you start to defend yourself, your brother will do the same. Take time out, calm down a bit, and then get back to the conversation.
   • The duration of the pause is determined only by you - it can last either five seconds or five minutes.
   • If this helps you calm down, work out how long you rest from each other. Give personal space to each other. Try to deal with your emotions on your own, without talking about them to each other.
   • If you find it difficult to calm down, try listening to music or taking a walk. This will distract you from the conflict and you can switch to something else. After that, you can calmly talk to your brother or sister.
   • If you want to calm down and do something nice for your loved one, take your pet and put him on the couch or where you hang out with your brother or sister. Your beloved pet will have a calming effect on both of you.
5. 5 Ignore unpleasant or rude comments to prevent conflict. Sibling quarrels are normal. However, if your brother says anything rude or obnoxious, try to ignore his words. If you don't, be prepared for a serious fight.
   • Better keep silent than telling your brother that he is an idiot.
   • If your sister is annoying you about your new shoes, ask her to stop acting like that.
   • If ignoring does not work, calmly say, "Please stop behaving this way."

Method 2 of 3: How to Resolve Conflicts

1. 1 Apologize to your brother or sister. Of course, it will be better if you express regret right away, before the conflict escalates into a serious quarrel or even a fight. However, if this is not possible, ask for forgiveness when you can. Rather than keep snapping back, be prepared to take responsibility for your behavior and apologize. If you did something wrong, ask for forgiveness for what you did. If the conflict was not your fault, you can still apologize to reduce the intensity of your emotions.
   • You will feel much better after asking for forgiveness.
   • If you want to end an argument with your brother or sister, remember, your goal is not to win the argument, but rather to improve the relationship.
   • Try to say: “Artem, I don’t want to quarrel with you. Sorry, I was bored and I started to bore you, "- or:" I'm sorry for everything I've done. "
2. 2 Use self-statements when talking about your feelings. Think about what is upsetting you and tell your brother how you feel. Start the sentence with “I feel,” then mention your thoughts and feelings related to the conflict. Being able to express your feelings openly will help prevent future conflicts.
   • Say: “Andrey, I am a little upset that you are quarreling with me about the shirt I took from you. I asked your permission before taking it. "
   • You can also say, "I get very annoyed when you laugh at me and don't pay attention to the fact that I'm asking you to stop doing this."
3. 3 Think back to past fights and conflicts, and notice repetitive behaviors. Think back to your last quarrels with your brother or sister. Are they similar to each other? Do they touch on the same topics? Think about how you have managed to resolve past conflicts. Thanks to this, you will be able to find the cause and solution of the current quarrel.
   • Think back to the last time you fought over the TV remote control.Why did this happen? Did you not like what your loved one chose, or did you want to choose what to watch?
   • You may continue to quarrel with your brother or sister because each of you thinks that he is right. However, if you remember that it was you who initiated the quarrel, it will be easier for you to end it.
4. 4 Come to a common solution that will help you prevent future fights. Talk about how you can prevent fights, such as leaving each other alone for a while or telling funny stories. Find a solution that each of you will agree with and try to implement it.
   • You may be upset because your brother is constantly teasing and calling you names. You have to defend yourself. Talk to him and ask him not to call you names anymore. Do not feel that your brother will not be able to keep his promise. After the conversation, you can go for a walk in the park together.
5. 5 Refer to his parents for help if you need it. If you continue to quarrel or fight and cannot solve the problem, seek help from your mom or dad. They can encourage you to listen to the voice of reason and help you find a solution to a problem. Ask them to help you, and they will certainly offer you solutions to the problem.
   • Say: “Dad, Masha constantly switches channels when I watch cartoons. I asked her to stop doing this, but she doesn't listen to me. You can help?"

Method 3 of 3: How to Maintain a Good Relationship

1. 1 Respect your relative's right to privacy and space. Although you are members of the same family, this does not mean that you should know everything about each other's personal lives. Respect your loved one’s personal space, such as their room, their diary, or their mobile phone.
   • Respecting the boundaries set by a brother or sister will show your love and care.
   • Do not read a sibling's diary or enter a room when he or she is not at home.
2. 2 Express your emotions and feelings in the right way. When you are angry or upset, you are much more likely to quarrel. Therefore, learn to control your feelings without splashing them out on your loved ones.
   • Tell a friend or parents about their thoughts. This will allow you to express your feelings, and you will be calmer when talking to your brother or sister.
   • If you are very annoyed with your brother or sister, try writing a letter. This is a safe way to voice your feelings without using harsh words. After writing the letter, you can calmly talk about your feelings.
3. 3 Do something nice for someone close to you to show them that you love and care. The constant bickering is difficult to maintain friendly relations. Show your brother or sister that you value them by doing something good for no apparent reason. Don't take your family members for granted.
   • Treat your brother or sister to ice cream or coffee as you get busy. Also try playing your favorite game or gift a new coloring book or magazine.
4. 4 Spend time together as often as possible. Whether you live in the same room as your brother or sister, or in different cities, try to spend more time together. Instead of fighting all the time, try to have a fun and interesting time. This will strengthen your relationship and reduce conflict situations.
   • Do activities that you enjoy, such as playing soccer, walking in the park, or watching movies.
5. 5 Build your brother or sister's trust by keeping your promises. If you promise your brother you won't tease him anymore, stick to your words. Be prepared to take responsibility for what you say. Your brother will start to trust you. Trust is an essential quality for maintaining healthy relationships and preventing conflict situations.
   • If your conflicts are related to the fact that you are constantly trying to command, stop behaving that way.Stop commanding and let your brother or sister make decisions.
   • If your sister doesn't trust you because you always shoot her with a toy pistol, try shooting a stationary target set up outside instead.

Tips

• Be kind to your brother or sister, even if they don't treat you that way.
• Praise your brother or sister to build trust between you.
• Try to understand and acknowledge that each person responds to situations differently. What one person does as a joke can make another feel resentful.
• If you accidentally say something bad or hurtful to your brother or sister, apologize and admit that you didn't mean to do it.
• If you are having problems with your brother or sister, try talking to your mom or dad about it.

Warnings

• Solve the problem with words, not fists. Speak calmly and do not do anything that might hurt the feelings of your brother or sister.
• Don't gossip about your brothers and sisters, or they will stop trusting you.