Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 4: Determining Your Self-Esteem
• Part 2 of 4: Improving Personal Care
• Part 3 of 4: Maintaining a Positive Lifestyle
• Part 4 of 4: Not Seeking Perfection
• Tips
• Warnings

Self-esteem is instilled in us in childhood. If we are often criticized in the bosom of family and friends, then the sense of our own worth is likely to be undermined. Low self-esteem robs self-confidence and makes it difficult to make even the smallest and most insignificant decisions. Building self-esteem builds self-confidence and is the first step towards happiness and a better life. Read on to find out how to boost your self-esteem!

Steps

Part 1 of 4: Determining Your Self-Esteem

1. 1 Find out your level of self-esteem. Self-esteem is how you feel. It is an important aspect of emotional well-being. High self-esteem means that we love and accept ourselves as we are and are mostly satisfied with ourselves. Low self-esteem means we are unhappy with ourselves.
   • The Clinical Research Center describes people with low self-esteem as having "deep, negative beliefs about themselves as a person. These beliefs are based on facts and truths about who they are."
   • In the long run, alas, low self-esteem can lead to big problems in life. Such people can become victims of abusive relationships, constantly shy and so afraid of making a mistake that they will not even try to achieve their intended goal.
2. 2 Develop self-esteem. Recognizing that your self-esteem is low is the first step towards correction. Your self-esteem is lowered if you have negative thoughts about yourself. These thoughts may relate to weight, shape, or other aspects of your life, such as your career or interpersonal relationships.
   • If your inner voice and thoughts about yourself are in most cases critical, then you have low self-esteem.
   • If your inner voice and thoughts about yourself are generally positive and pleasant, then you have high self-esteem.
3. 3 Listen to your inner voice. Determine what thoughts you have about yourself. Positive or negative? If you can't gauge your thoughts, write them down every day for several days or a week. After that, review your records to determine the trend.
   • The inner voice of people with low self-esteem often reveals one of the following personalities: a nagger, a maximalist, a person who makes an elephant out of a fly, a person who reads other people's thoughts. Each of these unique inner voices insults you or suggests that people think badly of you.
   • Turning off negative inner voices is the first step towards trusting yourself. Replace them with more positive thoughts.
   • For example, your inner voice may say, "I didn't get the job I wanted, that is, I can't find any other job, I'm useless." You need to change that thought and think like this: "I'm disappointed I didn't get this job, but I put in a lot of effort and will definitely find a good job."
4. 4 Find the source of your low self-esteem. A person is not born with low self-esteem, it is formed from childhood when they do not understand you, they treat you badly or as a result of a major negative event in life. By finding the source of your problems, you can overcome them.
   • If you notice any specific disturbing thoughts while listening to your inner voice, try to remember when you first had those thoughts.
   • For example, if you have negative thoughts about your weight or appearance, try to remember when you first began to feel uncomfortable about your weight. Maybe someone told you about this?
5. 5 Make it your goal to improve your self-esteem. The main thing to remember is that you need to change negative thoughts about yourself and make them positive. Ultimately, you will have to change your thoughts about yourself. Make it a goal to only think positively of yourself, and you can become more self-confident.
   • For example, an approximate goal might be: "I will think positively of myself, and speak of myself as a friend, not an enemy."

Part 2 of 4: Improving Personal Care

1. 1 List your positive qualities. Focus on the qualities you like about yourself to remind yourself of them when your inner voice begins to tell you otherwise. Congratulate yourself for the accomplishments you have.
   • People with high self-esteem are able to appreciate their positive qualities, even if they are far from perfect.
   • Hang the list in a prominent place, such as your bathroom mirror, and read it every day. You can add points to it as you become more confident in yourself.
2. 2 Keep a positive journal. Write down your accomplishments, compliments other people have given you, and good thoughts about yourself. While negative thoughts may not completely disappear, spend more time focusing on positive thoughts to improve your self-esteem over time.
   • Keeping a journal can be a powerful tool for monitoring your self-talk and can help improve your self-esteem.
   • Try to focus on the positivity journal to counter negative inner thoughts. For example, if you hurt yourself by not expressing your opinion about something, remember to write it down in a journal every time you do so.
3. 3 Write down your goals in a journal. You can set a goal to improve yourself without expecting to be perfect in everything. The goals should be specific and clear, however, you can leave some room for flexibility.
   • For example, instead of thinking, "I will always oppose people who spread ideas of discrimination and hatred," you could set yourself the goal: "I will do my best to calmly confront people who spread ideas of discrimination and hatred." ...
   • Instead of: "I will never eat sweets and will lose 15 kg.", Your goal should sound like this: "I will try to adhere to a healthy lifestyle."
4. 4 Forgive your imperfection. Remember that you, like everyone else, are a person who does not need to be perfect in order to have high self-esteem. If you can accept yourself as you are, even trying to improve something, then your self-esteem will increase.
   • Come up with a mantra for yourself: "It's okay, I'm still an amazing person."
   • For example, if you lose patience and yell at your child in the park, you might say to yourself, “I'm not perfect, but I will work to keep my emotions in check. I will apologize to the child and explain to him the reason for my anger. It's okay, I'm a great mom anyway. "
5. 5 See a specialist. If you feel that you are not able to improve your self-esteem, or are upset when exploring the causes of low self-esteem, consult a doctor who can help you overcome these problems.
   • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can help you deal with negative thoughts about yourself and teach you how to deal with your emotions without harming your health.
   • If you have serious problems, then you need deep psychodynamic therapy.
6. 6 Participation in charity. For many people, self-esteem rises when they start doing charity work. Volunteer with a charity!
   • Find an organization that matches your beliefs.
   • Invite a friend or friends to volunteer with you. You will help the organization (extra hands are always needed) and enjoy helping others.

Part 3 of 4: Maintaining a Positive Lifestyle

1. 1 Take time to take care of yourself. It is always difficult to find time for yourself to do something relaxing and enjoyable. Try to do this to boost self-esteem and productivity, both at work and at home.
   • Find a hobby that makes you feel better physically and mentally. Some people find yoga, cycling, or running to help you calm down and think positively.
2. 2 Surround yourself with positive people. If you are surrounded by negative people, because of whom you are not sure of yourself, then minimize communication with them. Surround yourself with positive people who will help boost your self-esteem.
   • Tell your family about your positivity journal so they too can contribute and help raise your self-esteem.
   • You can tell your loved ones or friends that you are working to improve your self-esteem and ask them to stop you every time you say something negative about you.
3. 3 Eat right. Choose foods rich in vitamins and fiber over buns and sodas.
   • Avoid junk food and eat a healthy diet.
   • Avoid chocolate bars, soda, donuts and cakes, which are full of calories, unhealthy and can lead to headaches and other illnesses.
   • Eat fruits, vegetables, lean meats, and legumes. They will energize you all day, help you cope with kids and work, and protect you from illness. You will be able to enjoy your life and spend time with your family.
4. 4 Go in for sports. Even the gym doesn't always help. Sometimes brisk walking is all you need to move more and improve your health.Exercise will energize you, make you feel better, and can also help boost your immunity.
   • Walking outdoors is refreshing and rejuvenating, especially if you spend most of your time working indoors.
   • Even a 10 minute workout once or twice a day will improve your health.
5. 5 Take time to personal hygiene. Take the time to look after your appearance. Choose clothes that make you feel confident and comfortable.

Part 4 of 4: Not Seeking Perfection

1. 1 Realize that there are unattainable goals. Like, for example, Picasso's paintings, where the standards of excellence are completely different. Perfection is highly subjective. It's natural to set the bar high, but often we set ourselves unrealistic goals. Life cannot go according to plan. If we fail to become perfect, frustration arises.
   • Setting unattainable goals for ourselves is not always bad, as they motivate us to find non-standard solutions and improve ourselves.
2. 2 Forgive yourself. You need to be able to forgive yourself if something goes wrong. Learn to value your achievements and strengths in order to be in harmony with yourself at the moment.

Tips

• Surround yourself with people who care about you! People who don't care about you can't help you improve your self-esteem.
• Be persistent. Self-esteem boosts depend on how much you get what you need / want. Remember that you must help yourself, first of all, in order to be able to help others.
• You are who you are, and no one can change that. Be yourself and don't copy others.
• Don't focus on the impression you make on others. Then you will fit perfectly into any company or situation.
• Most importantly, you must believe in yourself. If you are sure that you will succeed, then it will be so.
• Tell yourself that you are confident even if you don't feel that way. Your feelings and beliefs come from your thoughts about yourself. Think and act like you don't even know what it is to have low self-esteem.
• Self-confidence will help you achieve any goals in life. If something does not work out, do not despair, try again.
• Don't let glossy magazines, television, and other media erode your confidence. Do not let others impose on you thoughts about what is right, how to feel and what to strive for. Choose your own path.
• Take a look at yourself in the mirror every day. Try to find something attractive in yourself: a look, a smile, and so on.
• Always make sure that your internal dialogue flows in a positive way. Tell yourself how beautiful you look today, how great you are. Let positive thinking become your natural state.
• Ignore negative comments from other people. Listen to yourself and be confident, no one has the right to condemn you for being yourself.
• People who constantly say negative things about others are low-grade people. You shouldn't even waste ink writing down the comments of such people.

Warnings

• Constant low self-esteem can be a sign of depression. Check with your healthcare professional if this is the case.