Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Admit your mistake
• Part 2 of 3: Learn from your mistakes
• Part 3 of 3: Letting go of the error
• Tips
• Additional articles

"Nobody is perfect". "Everyone makes mistakes." We all know these truths, but feelings of guilt, shame, or regret over a mistake can stay with us and cause us suffering. Sometimes the hardest thing is to forgive yourself. It doesn't matter whether you made a mistake, big or small, it is for your own good (and the good of others) to accept your mistake and move on. Always remember: you will make mistakes; you can get through it; and you can learn a lot from them.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Admit your mistake

1. 1 Admit your mistake honestly. You can never deal with a mistake if you don’t stop denying it. You need to clearly identify the error, what led to it, and the degree of your fault.
   • This is not the time to come up with excuses. You may have been overwhelmed or distracted, but that doesn't change reality. Don't try to share responsibility, even if you can. You can only control your role in the error, and also accept it as yours.
   • We can sometimes use our guilt as a barrier that prevents us from accepting the consequences. If we do punish ourselves with guilt, then perhaps the other person will not punish us. If you want to move on, you must accept that there are consequences, and punishing yourself does not cancel the consequences.
2. 2 Share your feelings and findings. You may find it embarrassing enough to admit the mistake, even to yourself, let alone tell others about it. However, while embarrassing at first, discussing the mistake and your feelings about it with others can be key to letting go of the situation and moving on.
   • The time will come to share with the person you hurt by your mistake, but before that, it's best to talk to a friend, a psychologist, spiritual mentor, or someone else you trust.
   • It may sound silly, but verbally admitting your mistake, especially in front of someone else, will help you accept it.
   • When you share your mistake, you also realize that everyone makes mistakes and that no one is perfect. We all know these truths, but it's still easy to forget them when you're dealing with a mistake.
3. 3 Make amends. When you admit you made a mistake to yourself and to someone you hurt, the next step is to make every effort to fix it.By doing this, you may be realizing that your mistake was not such a huge problem. And if there was, then by working to fix it, you can quickly close the issue and move on.
   • In general, the sooner you start fixing things, the better. For example, if you made a mistake at work, and it cost the company money and / or the loss of a client, it is better to quickly report everything to your boss, but it is also worth leaving time to think about ways to correct the harm from this mistake. Don't let the mistake get worse by not paying attention to it, as this will only increase your guilt and the anger of those you have harmed.
   • There are times when your mistake does not harm a specific person, or harms those to whom you can no longer apologize or correct the situation. For example, you may have been too busy to visit your grandmother, and now she is no longer there. In such cases, consider sharing your experiences - help others in similar situations or just do good things. You can, for example, volunteer at a nursing home, or simply spend more time with your remaining relatives.

Part 2 of 3: Learn from your mistakes

1. 1 Analyze your mistake so you can learn from it. Digging into the details of your mistake may seem like a punishment to you, but looking at the error in detail is the best way to turn it into a learning process. Many mistakes will be helpful as you learn and improve from them.
   • Dive into the root causes of the error, such as jealousy (if you said something rude) or impatience (if you are driving at high speed). Organize the error in terms of, for example, envy or impatience, so that you can more easily find a solution.
   • Remember, if you want to learn from a mistake, you will choose to grow; a life of self-flagellation and self-contempt is a path to personal stagnation.
2. 2 Make a plan of action. Determining the cause of the error is just the first step towards learning from it. It is not enough just to say "I will not do this anymore"; you need to identify effective changes that will prevent you from repeating the same mistake over and over again.
   • You cannot magically learn from a mistake if you just analyze the details and admit that you are wrong, although these points are required. Think about what exactly you could do differently in this situation, and determine for yourself what exactly you would do differently in a similar situation.
   • Take some time and write down a plan of action for the next time. This will help you visualize the situation and prepare yourself to avoid repeating the mistake.
   • For example, you forgot to meet a friend at the airport because you took on too many responsibilities and couldn't remember everything. Once you've identified the problem (and apologize to your friend!), Create an action plan that will help you better prioritize your commitments when the turmoil begins. Also consider ways to say no if you are overwhelmed.
3. 3 Pay attention to habits that can make you repeat the mistake. Many of our most common mistakes, from overeating to scandals with a spouse for no reason, can be attributed to bad habits. To prevent repeating mistakes, you need to pay attention to the habits that cause them.
   • You may want to kick out all of your bad habits at once and create a “new self,” but it's best to focus on one habit at a time. After all, what are the chances that you can quit smoking and spend more time with your mom at the same time? Instead, focus on fighting one habit, then consider whether you are ready to crack the next.
   • Keep your changes as simple as possible.The more you complicate your plan to combat bad habits, the more likely it is to fail. If you want to get up earlier because you are regularly late for work and important appointments, just go to bed earlier and set your bedroom clock 10 minutes ahead.
   • Replace old habits with new ones. Make it something positive, like exercising, spending time with the kids, or volunteering.

Part 3 of 3: Letting go of the error

1. 1 Don't be too hard on yourself. Many people who find it difficult to overcome mistakes suffer from unrealistic demands on themselves. Of course, it is commendable to have a high standard of behavior, but if you try to fit yourself to the ideal, it will only bring you and your loved ones suffering.
   • Ask yourself, "Is this mistake as serious as I imagine it to be?" If you look at it honestly, most of the time the answer is no. If the answer is yes, all you can do is convince yourself that an even greater lesson can be learned from this mistake.
   • Show compassion for yourself as you would for others. Consider if you would treat your friend so harshly if he made the same mistake. In almost every situation, you would show support and compassion. In this case, you should become your best friend and act accordingly, empathizing with yourself.
2. 2 Forgive yourself. It can be difficult to forgive others for their misdeeds, but often it is still easier than forgiving yourself for your own, even minor, oversights. If, as the old saying goes, “charity begins at home,” you should learn to start with yourself.
   • It may seem stupid to you, but you should try to verbally forgive yourself, that is, you need to say so directly: “I forgive myself for spending the money intended to pay for an apartment on a trip out of town”. For some people, it can be just as effective to write down the mistake and forgiveness of yourself on a piece of paper, then crumple it up and throw it away.
   • Forgiving yourself means reminding yourself that you are not your mistakes. You are not a mistake or an error, you have no defects. You are an imperfect creature who makes mistakes like everyone else and grows because of them.
3. 3 Take care of yourself and those around you. If you’re trying to let go of a mistake, it’s important to remind yourself that obsessing over the mistake can be bad for your health and can be destructive for those close to you. You should find a way out and get rid of the mistake for the sake of yourself and your family.
   • When you feel guilty, chemicals are released in your body that increase your risk of heart disease, increase cholesterol levels, and interfere with digestion, muscle relaxation, and critical thinking skills. Too much guilt can harm your health.
   • The adage “misfortune does not go alone” is true, since the one who does not allow himself to get rid of the feeling of guilt provokes the emergence of all of the above in himself. You will be more critical of yourself and others because of this feeling of guilt about your mistake, and your significant other, your children, friends, and even pets will suffer because of it.
4. 4 Move on. Once you've admitted your mistake, tried to fix the damage and forgave yourself for what you did, you should let go of the situation and not worry about it anymore. All of this should only exist in the form of a lesson learned that will benefit you and help you move on.
   • When you find yourself back to your mistake and guilt, remind yourself that you have been forgiven. Say it out loud if necessary to remind yourself that the issue is closed.
   • Some people benefit from the Positive Emotion Refocusing Technique (PERT). To apply it, close your eyes and take two long, deep breaths in / out. On the third breath, begin to visualize either the one you love or the natural beauty and tranquility.As you continue to breathe this way, explore this “happy place” and take your guilt with you. Find a way to get rid of it and find peace of mind in this space, then open your eyes and leave the guilt behind.
   • Moving on can help you build your life without regrets. Remember, it's better to learn from a mistake than to regret what was left undone. What is true for children who are learning to walk or ride a bike, the same is true for adults who are trying to deal with a mistake: when you fall is practice, and when you get up to try again is progress.

Tips

• In fact, when you make a mistake, you learn a lesson to learn.
• Taking responsibility is liberating. Of course, admitting that you are wrong is difficult. But this indicates strength, courage and interest in self-improvement. In other words, it deserves respect. In this way, you demonstrate that you care about yourself.

Additional articles

How to forgive How to ask for forgiveness How to forgive yourself How to get rid of guilt How to restore trust How to make someone feel guilty How to overcome guilt How to accept an apology How to ask Allah for forgiveness How to free yourself from guilt How to overcome your fear of sex How to stop crying when you are very upset How to Get Rid of Masturbation Addiction How to help a girl get through "these" days