Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Make a good impression
• Part 2 of 3: Being a good conversationalist
• Part 3 of 3: Be considerate

Are you the type of person who finds it difficult to have any kind of relationship with people? Do you consider yourself to be someone who offends others or starts a fight when just trying to order coffee or say hello to colleagues? Or do you just want to get along a little better with people to make your life easier? Regardless of the purpose of your desire to connect with other people, all you have to do is work to make people feel that you really care about them and to be considerate of their feelings.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Make a good impression

1. 1 Smile. A smile is always highly regarded. You might think that smiling will not affect how people think of you. However, when you smile at people, you show that you are happy to be around them, and make it clear that you are an outgoing, friendly person who is worth talking to. It doesn't matter if you're talking to people or just walking by, make an effort to smile the next time you're around. Plus, scientific studies have shown that smiling really makes you feel happy, so everyone benefits from it!
   • Make an effort to smile at at least ten today. Once you get into the habit of it, it will look completely natural.
2. 2 Be completely engrossed in your interactions with the other person. If you show clearly that you are fully engaged in the conversation and there is nothing you would like to do instead, then you have a better chance of people reaching out to you. Don't check your phone every five minutes, don't look around the room, don't play with your nails, or talk about a meeting you have to go to later.You don't want people to feel uncomfortable when you talk to them. Instead, take the time to make eye contact, ask people questions, and make them feel like you are enjoying the time with them.
   • It is not easy to turn off these distractions and learn to live in the present. Sometimes the first step can be “unplugging”. If you are talking to a coworker, move away from the computer. If you are having a meeting with a close friend, turn off your phone for a few hours.
   • Give the person you are talking to the attention he or she deserves. Take the time to read his or her body language and facial expressions to see how he or she is feeling, instead of seeing what everyone else in the room is seeing.
3. 3 Develop your positivity. Another easy way to get along with people is to always be in a good mood. If you radiate positive energy instead of complaining, taunting people, or expressing dissatisfaction with everyone around you, then people will be more willing to communicate with you because they themselves become more cheerful in your presence. Try to learn to pay more attention to the good in your life and be humorous about your own failures. If you want to get along with people, it will be much easier if you walk through life with a smile rather than a frown.
   • Every time you catch yourself making a negative comment, make up for it with two or three positive comments. It's okay to be dissatisfied at times, but you should hope that there is only good ahead of you, and not dwell on setbacks that drag you down.
   • Another way to stay positive is to work on praising people more often. This sets a friendly tone for the conversation, and you will likely receive the same response.
   • Another way to develop a positive outlook on life is to surround yourself with positive people. You will copy their thinking and behavior, and this will help you get along with other people. A cheerful, positive friend next to you can also help you get along with people.
4. 4 Know your audience. If you want to make a good impression on people, then you must learn to understand who your interlocutor is. If you see yourself running into a conservative person, then the topics of discussion may be completely different from those that you would discuss with a hippie. Make sure you consider who you are communicating with before raising an issue that might become a topic of discussion. If you want to get along with people, it is important to know what they would like and what they would not like to hear. This will help you make a positive first impression.
   • Observe how the other person interacts with others to get a better idea of ​​what they like. and what - no. If a person laughs hard at a vulgar anecdote, you will know that this kind of humor is acceptable to him.
   • Don't forget the age of the person. An older person cannot appreciate a comment about how you got older if you are ten years younger; the young man will not be able to understand any of your cultural references.
   • Education level can also matter. If you are speaking to someone with a Ph.D. in English, they may be offended if you are trying to explain who Ernest Hemingway was.
5. 5 Learn to maintain light conversation. Another skill that is needed. to create a good impression. is the ability to maintain a light conversation on general topics. While you might think it’s not serious, these are the conversations that start a serious, meaningful conversation, so you need to learn to chat lightly when you meet people.You need to be able to naturally ask general questions in order to get to know the person a little, tell the right joke in time, and feel comfortable around a new acquaintance. Here are some tips on how to conduct such a conversation:
   • Compliment the person's clothes or items. This can lead to a good conversation.
   • Don't be afraid to talk about the weather. This can lead to talking about your weekend plans or even your hobbies.
   • Ask questions that require more than a yes or no answer. This may help to continue the conversation.
   • Don't get too stressed out by the awkward silence. Instead of commenting on it, ask a simple question or say something to move the conversation forward.
6. 6 Demonstrate a genuine interest in people. One of the easiest ways to make a good first impression is to show genuine interest in people as soon as you shake their hand. You don’t have to ask them a million questions, but it’s quite appropriate to ask their opinion on some issue, hobby, or ask about the family. The truth is that people love it when others take an interest in them. Therefore, letting them know that you are more interested in listening to them than talking about yourself can go a long way in helping you build relationships with people.
   • The best way to show genuine interest is to really listen, not just nod your head and wait until it's your turn to speak.
   • When a person gives good news, let him know that it really matters to you, and don't get off with general phrases.
   • If the person is an expert at something, ask them questions about it to show that you are interested in what they have to say.

Part 2 of 3: Being a good conversationalist

1. 1 Let your virtues speak for themselves. You don't have to brag about how cool you are at work, tennis, or writing novels to make people enjoy talking to you. If you are really good at something, then people will eventually be able to see it themselves, or they will hear about it from another person. If you are constantly talking about yourself, not letting the other people interject a word, it will be difficult for you to get along with people. Others will consider you self-centered, and communication with you will tire and annoy them.
   • You can talk about your interests without talking about how successful you are. There is no need to mention any awards you have won, or people will feel a little annoyed.
   • Instead, praise the virtues of others. This is much more interesting for them.
2. 2 Think before you speak. One of the essential qualities of a good conversationalist is taking the time to think about your words before speaking them. If you are the type of person who thinks before speaking, or someone who thinks and speaks at the same time, then it's time to take a break and think about how your words will affect the people around you, and if you offend them. It's also a good way to see if you are saying something inappropriate or even boring to the people around you.
   • If you want to ask a sensitive question, take a few seconds to mentally form it. This is much better than blurting out something that you might regret.
3. 3 Don't talk continuously. A good conversationalist never turns a conversation into a monologue. He knows how to get a person to talk and conduct a conversation so that the interlocutor is comfortable. If you want to get along with people, then you cannot talk and talk about yourself; instead, you should speak enough to be interesting and to make a good impression. Make sure that your lines of communication take up no more than half of the conversation when talking one-on-one, so that the other person does not get bored and does not feel unnecessary.
   • If you are having a group conversation, then you can tell a funny anecdote or two, but make sure other people contribute to the conversation.Let other people talk if they have something to say, and don't interrupt them to prove they are wrong.
   • Even if someone said something a little off the mark, you should avoid the temptation to argue over every little thing he or she says. Arguing will not help you befriend the person and maintain normal relationships with those around you.
4. 4 Avoid topics that can lead to controversy. Another way to get along with people more easily is to avoid topics that can easily become the subject of bitter controversy. These include abortion, gay rights, political views, and controversial views on marriage or parenting. Once you get to know people better, you will be able to discuss more serious topics with them, but when you first try to connect with people, you should stick to more enjoyable topics like weekend plans, hobbies, or popular music.
   • If someone else brings up a dangerous topic, you can try to tactfully steer the conversation in a safer direction. It can help you build relationships with people
5. 5 Be tactful. Tact is a key factor when it comes to good relationships with other people. To have tact means to choose your words carefully and when you say them. For example, if you want to give someone personal advice, it is best to do it when you are alone, so that the person does not feel uncomfortable; the same applies to telling a person that they have something stuck in their teeth. You should avoid inadvertent comments, such as saying, “Marriage is the most important part of life” to someone who has just got divorced, and you should always think about the feelings of others before speaking.
   • Another way to be tactful is to avoid sharing too personal information with people you barely know. While it may seem like it helps you get closer to people, it can actually alienate them.
   • A tactful person also remembers cultural differences when talking to people. This can help you understand if your comments will be well received.
6. 6 Find common ground. Another great way to build relationships with people in conversation is to find common bonds that will bring you closer together. When you talk to people, keep your ears open for hints about your, perhaps, similar interests. If it turns out, for example, that you are from the same city, it could be a sign that you support the same sports team. You don't have to share all of your interests with the person you're talking to, just find one or two things that connect, whether it's your love of TV shows or your passion for home cooking.
   • Even if your views differ on everything, but you both support the same football team, you can build your entire relationship around that interest. Don't underestimate how important it is to have common connections.

Part 3 of 3: Be considerate

1. 1 Prioritize. If you want to get along with people, you must carefully weigh whether you really want to start an argument or quarrel. You should not flare up like a match and start a fierce polemic on any occasion, it is better to keep silent in time. If you’re talking to a colleague or new acquaintance, don’t swear all the time about politics or sports, or argue over who should pay the bill. While it is very important to be able to stand up for yourself, it is equally important to know when to hold your tongue.
   • Before you start arguing with a person, ask yourself if it is really worth it and what you will get by proving that you are right. Sometimes it's worth standing up for yourself, but other times, it's easier to just agree with people.
   • There are some controversies where you simply cannot win. Sometimes it is much better to agree with the opposite opinion than to start a controversy.
2. 2 Think well of people. People who have problems with others tend to think badly of others until they get convincing evidence to the contrary. People who find a common language with most people always see good in others, and always think well of a person, even without any evidence of this. You have to work on being able to assume that every new acquaintance is a sane person, unless he made a really terrible impression; give people enough time to prove themselves around you, and it will be much easier for you to get along with him.
   • Give people at least two or three chances. Not everyone is good at making a first impression.
   • If someone has told you something negative about a new acquaintance, you should give the person a chance before you write them off.
3. 3 Apologize if you made a mistake. In order to be truly mindful, you must admit when you made a mistake and be willing to admit it. If you said something bad about a person or came to dinner half an hour late but want to get along with people, you should apologize for your mistakes and really repent, not just talk about it. This will show that you have compassion and that you are not unfounded, and will not hide your mistakes like rubbish under the carpet. It will be easier for people to find common ground with you if they know that you are not perfect.
   • When you apologize, look people in the eye to show them that you are sincere. Don't look away, don't check your phone, or they'll think the apology doesn't really matter to you.
   • One way to get along with people is to avoid repeating your mistakes. It's one thing to apologize, and it's another not to make a mistake again.
4. 4 Put yourself in the other person's shoes. One of the main ways you can help you be considerate and get along better with people is to practice putting yourself in people's shoes before starting a conversation with them. Try to think about how the other person is thinking and feeling, and adapt your conversation with that person accordingly. While it's impossible to know exactly what's going on in another person's head, your efforts can help you get along with people by knowing what topics of conversation they are interested in.
   • For example, if your colleague is having a family tragedy, you should understand that you should be compassionate about it and not talk about anything too sad.
   • If your friend is getting married within two weeks, then now is not the best time to start complaining about his personal troubles, because he is likely to be overwhelmed with emotions.
5. 5 Take time to thank people. Showing your gratitude is one of the best ways to be considerate. Take time to tell people that you are grateful for what they did for you, whether it’s a thank you card for your boss or flowers for your friend for helping you clean the apartment, it’s important to be grateful if you want to get along with people. ... If you don't thank the person when gratitude is needed, people will find it difficult to get along with you because they think you think you are too important to say thank you.
   • Don't underestimate the power of a thank you letter or postcard. While this may sound old-fashioned, they can really show people how much they mean to you.
6. 6 Remember important details. One way to show people that you really care about them is to remember the important details they tell you. If you remember a person's name after a fleeting meeting with him, he will most likely like you. If you remember the names of his brothers and sisters, he will be even more impressed and most likely will have a good opinion of you. Pay attention to what people are telling you so that you can show them how much you care by mentioning it later.
   • If you immediately forget what you’ve been told, people will find it difficult to contain their irritation with you.
   • If you really show interest in the person, you can even write down some important details that the new person told you so that you can remember them next time.
   • Also try to remember the dates of birthdays and anniversaries. Knowing this can help people build relationships with you because they will know that you care.
7. 7 Help the person to love themselves. Another way to get along with people is to work on giving the person a sense of their own worth. Give people genuine compliments about their new haircut or their sense of humor, if you really think so, instead of being a hypocrite. Let your face glow when someone walks by instead of looking at them with subtle joy. Ask people for advice in their areas of expertise to show that you truly value their opinions.
   • People get along better with those who value and respect them, and tend to disagree with people who humiliate them. It's simple.
   • After all, it is much more important to be interested in others than to try to interest them in your own person. Don't go out of your way to impress those around you; instead, show attention to them.