Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Building the Mood
• Part 2 of 3: Unperturbed Behavior
• Part 3 of 3: An Imperturbable Lifestyle
• Warnings

Constant worries and doubts can haunt you on a daily basis, increasing your stress levels. Such emotions and high levels of stress make it difficult for us to do what we like or enjoy it. Reorient your consciousness a little - and you will become calm and do not allow troubles to pester you. You are made of sturdy dough and no one can confuse you. "And God be with him" is not your motto, he about you!

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Building the Mood

1. 1 Look for the comic side of everything. The advantage of equanimity is not to be happy, but not to get upset, angry, or tense out of the blue. And how can this be achieved? Well, a good start - if everything looks funny to you. Just as there is something good about anything bad, there is also a funny side to be found in most situations.
   • Although the example is simple, let's imagine that you stumbled and fell right on the stage of an awards ceremony. Instead of burning with shame, it is better to pretend that it was intended and accept your award from the floor, or raise your hands in a silent "ta-dam" gesture and draw all the attention to yourself. Let people scream and hoot for themselves.
2. 2 Pretend you don't have the shame gene. We all have a voice in our heads telling us to look cool and behave socially. In general, this voice is quite smart - it helps us make friends, connections and makes life a little easier. But sometimes it prevents us from getting off the beaten track, prevents us from growing, and simply makes us anxious, emotionally excitable and fearful people. Instead, pretend for a moment that you don't have it. How would you behave? What would your body tell the world? This is equanimity.
   • We do so much to avoid shame and feel accepted. If you didn't have this aspiration, what would you do differently? Would it really bother you that Katya would like your shoes, or that Masha would answer your message? Probably not. Start by focusing on equanimity for a few minutes a day until it naturally happens most of the time.
3. 3 Worry less about things you cannot change. The world will end at some point. Are you worried about this? Probably not. Sometimes your mom wears terrible sweaters. Does it bother you? Hardly. If you are unable to change it, there is no point in worrying. What can you do? Worry about it ... and then worry a little more? Yeah. It doesn't make any sense.
   • So when does your teacher announce the unscheduled test? No reaction from you. There is no point in worrying about this.The only thing that you should care about is how to deal with it well. And when does your passion fail to respond to your message? Move on - you would feel it anyway.
4. 4 Don't take yourself (or whatever) too seriously. The whole life becomes incomparably easier when you come to the conclusion that there is not so much important in it. We are all just fine grains of sand on this amazing blue planet, and if something does not go our way, well, this is how the world works. Good and bad will happen. Why bother so hard about it?
   • You've probably met someone who takes themselves much more seriously than they should. They are nervous and constantly worried about what other people think of their actions, words, or looks. In fact, nobody really thinks about them. Even looking at them is exhausting because they are so highly worked up. Become the opposite of such a person, and equanimity will come.
5. 5 Take up yoga. In addition to being a great way to burn calories and keep your muscles toned, yoga is also fantastic at helping you get rid of the mental gibberish that many of us have. According to many studies, "yogis" suffer less from stress, anxiety and even boast lower blood pressure. If you find it challenging to change the way you think, yoga can do it for you.
   • Deep breathing exercises are another good idea. Concentrating on your body and breath takes you out of your consciousness into the here and now. You focus on more tangible realities, like the chair you're sitting in, that touches your skin, or room temperature - not something you've been experiencing recently.

Part 2 of 3: Unperturbed Behavior

1. 1 Be an adult version of yourself. When we worry and worry, we also focus on ourselves and become selfish. Suddenly everything starts spinning around me, me, me and whatever you need you should get it and now - in other words, we become children. Recognize this part in yourself (we all have it), and instead choose an adult in yourself (everyone also has it). How would the older, more mature part of you react?
   • Let's say you just sent a message to your boyfriend or girlfriend. No answer has come yet. The clock is ticking, the minutes pass, and you still did not answer. A child wants to respond to you: "What are you doing? Why aren't you answering ?! Is there something wrong? Is it really possible ?!" No. You won't. Instead, you pick up a book. If they don't write back, nothing. All the same, you already do not remember what you wrote to them.
2. 2 Don't show a wide range of emotions. The very designation of equanimity is to be calm and relaxed, one might say, 24 hours and 7 days a week. You may show little interest or happiness - or even a little frustration or dissatisfaction - but underneath it all, you are still as calm as a boa constrictor. It's not about being indifferent and unemotional, it's about being cool.
   • For example, your crush tells you to get off. Heck. It sucks. You want to cry and howl, revel in your feelings, but the calm part of you knows better. And you don’t just say “okay,” and you’ll move on as if nothing happened, because it did happen. When you talk to your friends about it, you might say something like, "Dude, this is lousy. I wish it didn't work out that way, but I'm really glad I didn't ask her out!"
3. 3 Don't invest in the opinion of others. You know what an opinion is, right? We all have it. Trying to please everyone and to please everyone is a waste of effort, because it just won't happen. It doesn't matter what others think of you; life goes on no matter what. Moreover, will you remember what Katya said about your hair in two weeks? No. Therefore, do not attach such importance to it. You do yours and that's what has the meaning.
   • When only your opinion counts, it will be easier for you to remain more relaxed and relaxed. In other words, stay cool. You are in control all your opinionsthat matter. How wonderful is this feeling? You can't keep track of everything else and you shouldn't even try.
4. 4 Watch your body language. Even if we say the calmest and coldest things, sometimes our body betrays us. Your voice says, "It's okay. Don't worry," when steam comes out of your ears and your hands are clenched into fists. There is not much news here: everyone will notice this. Therefore, when you speak calmly, also make sure that it is confirmed by your body.
   • The position of the body is usually determined by the situation. The main way to look worried and anxious (and not calmly) - this is if your muscles are tense. If you think your body might give you away, walk over it from head to toe, consciously checking to see if every part of it is relaxed. If not, relax her. Hence, spiritual equanimity can arise.
5. 5 Develop the perfect shrug. If someone comes to you with fresh gossip, this is your reaction to which you will resort. It doesn't have to be a real shrug, but at its core it will be equated. "Oh great. How did you hear that?" - a good verbal "shrug" when expected to hear from you: "Oh God, are you serious ?!" In your case, in fact, everything goes into one ear and goes into the other.
   • It's also a good idea to have a mental shrug attitude as well. Spilled milk? Shaking. Well, you probably need to wipe the stain, right? Have you put on a couple of extra pounds? Shaking. More salad today.

Part 3 of 3: An Imperturbable Lifestyle

1. 1 Go your own way. Those people who are not equanimous (outrageous if you will) are busy adjusting their lives to what others consider normal. They try so hard to keep everything in order to be accepted and loved. In short, they worry too much... And about those things that are not worth it. Don't repeat their lifestyle or anyone else's - go your own way. You don't care what others say - you will do what brings you joy.
   • This helps for many reasons. This way you are constantly busy, you make many new friends, and you also feel happy and satisfied. The larger your world, the less everyone gets. One person who could have upset you before can no longer do it, because you know dozens of the same people.
2. 2 Understand that you have a lot of grains. Let's use this example: let's say you want to plant a garden, but you only have one seed. You plant this grain so carefully, watch it day and night, worrying that nothing will come of it, maybe even in the process you destroy it. Fortunately, real life is not about your garden. You have so many seeds that you hardly know what to do with them all! You can scatter a little here, a little there, and then see what happens. How important is this to you? Well, important enough. You want your garden to flourish. But are you going to stay awake all night, worrying about one little grain? What more.
   • This is a somewhat figurative way of saying that there is a lot going on in your life. If one thing doesn't work, well, that's okay. There are a thousand other things in your life that are going great, thank them for that. So there is no need to worry. If this "seed" does not come up, you will plant another one.
3. 3 Allow others to take the initiative in most plans. Another way to seem far from equanimity is to act too passionately. You are always the one who is excited and gushing with ideas, trying to get people to do something. Slow down a little, ardent innovator. To be calm, you need to be approached by others in most cases. You are willing to participate, but you are just a passenger on the flight.Not the captain of the ship.
   • This is what concerns most of time. You do not want to be a stupid empty person who only goes out on other people's good ideas. You also want your friends to know how much you value them. If you are invited, make it clear that you had fun and next time you can throw a party, for example, in your house. After all, friendship is a two-way road.
4. 4 Let go of problems on the brakes. When Idina Menzel in her song says: "Let go, let go," she is not joking. If your mood pendulum is trying to swing left or right, stop for a moment. Count to 10 and let it go. Focus on your calmness, composure, and composure. Like this. Surely you are happy or, of course, you are sad - but you will not let this affect you. What's the point of this?
   • If something really bothers you and you are trying to fight it, just tell yourself that you are worried about it tomorrow. But as long as your consciousness is free, you know that you will return to this in 24 hours. What happens next? Tomorrow comes and you either no longer remember what to worry about, or you already feel much better (or at least have more control over everything) because of what happened.

Warnings

• Remember that neutrality is best seen during times when there is a heavy emotional burden. This is the best way to hide your feelings and not scare other people away. This quality can define you as a tough person with a stone endurance.
• Be receptive to the feelings of others. Too much equanimity can hurt people and drive them away from you. Unfortunately, it can also scare your crush off if you're not careful.