Content

• Steps
• Advice

Most people are not satisfied with their life and themselves. If you feel like you want to change yourself, you're in luck, because it's doable! Big change can be difficult but not impossible if you are willing to set a goal and achieve it. Changing your action can lead to a total change in how you see yourself.

Steps

Part 1 of 4: Personal Needs Assessment

1. 

   Identify the problem. You are determined to change, but why and how? Clarifying the problem or aspect of yourself that you need to change is the only way to resolve this. What results will the change have?
   • It is best to start with optimism. Make a list of the things you like about yourself. If it's too difficult, write down what other people like about you. Knowing your strengths makes it easier to correct and eliminate worse habits.
   • Write down what you want in a sentence. Make sure that's the thing friend wants, not wants of others. If you don't really want to change, then you won't be able to.
   • Next, list the reason you want to change. Seeing all of the dynamics listed in front of you will keep you on the right track.

2. 

   
   
   Self-affirmation. Self-affirmation, or telling yourself positive things, can help shape your core values ​​and focus on the personality you want to achieve. While unrealistic assertions (such as “I accept everything for who I am”) won't work as it causes controversy, realistic optimistic statements like “I am values ​​and being a hard worker ”can help you stay optimistic and better solve problems. To make an effective personal statement, try the following steps:
   • Use the statement "I am"
     • For example, "I am a good person", "I work hard", "I create".
   • Use the statement "I can"
     • For example, "I can reach my maximum potential", "I can be who I want to be", "I can achieve my goal".
   • Use the statement "I will"
     • For example, "I will be the person I want to be", "I will overcome obstacles", "I will prove that I can change my life".

3. 

   
   
   Envisioning the future has been changed. Visualization is one type of mental image that helps you imagine another situation. You can abstract (in mind) or visualize a concrete expression, like a gallery of images showing what you are doing. Effective visualization helps you determine what you are doing and cultivate your goals. In addition, visualization helps you develop the ability to control situations in your life. To envision your changing future, please
   • Close your eyes.
   • Imagine the future as you wish. Where are you? Doing? What's the difference? Who do you look like? What has changed in your life that makes you happy?
   • Allow yourself to visualize and explore specific details about your ideal life, what would it be like? Try to imagine a specific scenario / sound / smell / taste. Focusing on details makes images come to life.
   • Use positive visualization to set the ideal life goals you see.

4. 

   
   
   Expect difficulty. In life, everything never goes according to our plan. The way you go will be met with many obstacles and many people will prevent it. You need to be prepared to overcome the pitfalls of the road if you want to succeed.
   • Always reality is the best way to deal with problems. Don't blame yourself and others for not achieving your goals. Failure is normal.

5. 

   Learn from failure. There may be times when you experience feelings of failure. You don't reach your goals or milestones, the path to success is long and tedious. Always remember that failure is not simply failure, it is an opportunity. You can learn a lot of valuable lessons from your mistakes, and you will find that a little flexibility in your long-term goals will make life more enjoyable.

6. 

   Persistence. If something can change overnight then it has no value. You can't see the results right out of the plan. It is difficult to notice a change or a result in yourself, but it is easier for outsiders to detect it. You change little by little every day and it is difficult to notice or observe yourself, but this is happening.
   • Small goals and milestones within a big goal can help you gauge if you're on the right track. Reward yourself for reaching a small goal that will keep you motivated!
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Part 2 of 4: Set appropriate goals

1. 

   Remember to set SMART goals. Setting goals is also an art, and if done right, you will almost certainly achieve your goal. SMART is the first letter in English to help you evaluate a goal's effectiveness:
   • S- Specific or significant (Specific or significant)
   • M - Measurable or meaningful (Can be appreciated / Meaningful)
   • A - Achievable or action-oriented (Can be successful / Action oriented)
   • R - Relevant or results-oriented (Related / Oriented)
   • T - Time-bound or trackable (Time-bound / Trackable)

2. 

   Set specific goals. This means setting goals that are narrow and specific. If you set a goal that is broad and broad, it will be difficult to plan your action to achieve it. Having a specific plan will make it easier for you to succeed.
   • For example, "being successful" is an overly vague goal. Success is not a specific goal and everyone has a different definition.
   • A specific goal might be to "obtain a master's degree in sociology from a national university". This goal is much more specific.

3. 

   Make sure your goals are measurable. You need to keep track of your goal completion time. If you cannot say when "achieved", your goal cannot be measured.
   • For example, "being successful" is an immeasurable goal. You don't know when you will be officially “successful” and your definition of success may change day by day.
   • On the other hand, “get a master's degree in sociology at a national university” is measurable, you know that you have achieved your goal at graduation or when you receive your degree by email.

4. 

   Make sure the goal is achievable. A goal that can be accomplished will vary from person to person. Whether you can do it or not depends on many factors, and one of them you cannot control. The way to determine if a goal is achievable is to ask yourself if you have the knowledge, skills, and ability to achieve that goal. You need to evaluate whether your goal is good or not.
   • For example, the goal that cannot be accomplished is to become the smartest / richest / most powerful person in the world.
   • Goals are more likely to be accomplished than earning a college degree. For some it is a high school diploma.

5. 

   Evaluate the relevance of the target. This is important for short term goals that lead to long term goals. Your goals should be relevant, relevant to the big picture. You are less likely to succeed if that goal has nothing to do with your life.
   • For example, the goal of "getting a master's degree in sociology at a national university" is relevant only to your life if you want to work in the social field (or a career related to that field. there). If your goal is to be a pilot, then a sociology degree won't work for the long term.

   

   Shannon O’Brien, MA, EdM

   Life & career coach Shannon O’Brien is the founder and lead consultant at Whole U. (a career and life strategy consulting firm in Boston, MA). Through counseling, online seminars and training, Whole U. motivates people to pursue work and live a balanced, purposeful life. Shannon has been ranked as # 1 Career Coach and # 1 Life Coach by Yelp in Boston, MA. The Boston.com, Boldfacers, and UR Business Network sites have reported on her. She received her Masters in Technology, Innovation & Education from Harvard University.

   

   Shannon O’Brien, MA, EdM
   Life & Career Coach

   A common mistake when setting goals is choosing the wrong job. People often choose a life or career goal over a goal really their. Setting goals is fine, but if you set goals for others or to impress others, you're less likely to succeed or be happy - set goals for yourself and the right people.

6. 

   Set a time limit for a goal. Efficient goals need time control; otherwise you will just work hard but never get there.
   • For example, "getting a master's degree in sociology at a national university in the next 5 years" is the time limit. It is essential to evaluate the time to work on your goals, but you should set a time limit to motivate yourself to work instead of seeing this as a vague prospect that will happen “one day”.
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Part 3 of 4: Turn your goals into action

1. 

   Start right now. Saying you will do it "tomorrow" is like never doing. Tomorrow will never come. To change, you cannot procrastinate, because you get nothing out of it.

2. 

   Divide your big goal into smaller goals. Once you've identified your main goal, you can break it down into a "milestone" goal. (Some people call it "macro" and "micro" goals.) This helps you accomplish your big goal step by step.
   • If you feel hesitant to start because the end goal is out of reach, try to forget those things and focus on your first milestone goal.
   • For example, if you want to lose 20 kg in 2 years, never mind 20. Let's start with your first goal, maybe lose 2kg.
   • Try doing a reverse schedule. If you set a time limit with an end goal (time control), you need to hit the “milestone” or shorter goal on time. Otherwise, you'll have to re-adjust your calendar multiple times to fit everything in on your schedule (or you need to recalculate when you end up with your final goal).
   • The reverse calendar gives you a specific starting point, and you can take the first step, often the hardest.

3. 

   Reward yourself. Acknowledging your work history with optimism and self-reward will help you get more excited. Raise your hands in celebration, watch TV for another 30 minutes or go to dinner in a luxurious place.
   • Avoid rewarding yourself for things that are against your hard work. If your goal is to lose weight, reward yourself with new clothes or a small trip, don't buy food.

4. 

   Use emotions. When you work to achieve your goals, you have a variety of emotions that are normal in life. If you find your emotions related to achieving your goals or changing yourself; Try to take advantage of them:
   • When you reach a "micro" milestone or goal, let yourself be happy or use it to motivate yourself.
   • If you get stuck on the road, let that frustration focus back on your goals.
   • If you get close to your goal and make a last-minute change, use your anger to regain your energy and reach the goal no matter the obstacles.

5. 

   Make yourself uncomfortable. Most people are comfortable working on a daily basis in life. If you want to make a big change, you have to "make it difficult" for yourself. Don't worry, this feeling can help you grow and experience new things.
   • This is another benefit that the "micro" goal gives you. If you plan to start moving from your current state to your destination, this will be a big change. However, if you only plan to approach the first "milestone" goal then this is a less frightening prospect.
   • For example, you do administrative work but this doesn't make you happy and you have the following goal: "to be a nurse working in the emergency room in 3 years". "Jumping" to that environment doesn't seem pleasant. But reaching your first goal or entering a nursing school will only slightly surpass your comfort zone.
   • Allow yourself to feel uncomfortable about taking each new step of your goal, and grow from that feeling. You will be surprised by yourself and experience positive emotions as you accumulate new experiences and get closer to your destination.
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Part 4 of 4: Review progress

1. 

   Stay motivated. During the process of self-transformation, you will encounter obstacles and find it difficult to stay on the right path. You need to be aware of these times and deal with the problem appropriately.
   • Make yourself responsible. Show off the process with family, friends or online forums.
   • Don't exhaust yourself. You may want to run for 16km on the first day, but then you will feel tired and unable to continue. Relax your goal.
   • Follow the monologue. If it's negative, stop! Replace negative thoughts into positive ones. End of half-thinking.
   • Find like-minded people. A strong support group will exponentially easier your efforts.

2. 

   Keep track of how you feel. Monitoring your behavior and finding common ground will help you find the most effective way to reach your goals.
   • If you find yourself falling into old habits, write down your time, ways and reasons. Analyze the cause. It could be that you're hungry or tired after the workday.
   • Process notes! If you have a great day, get it on paper! Reviewing the progress you have made will help motivate you to move on.

3. 

   Healthy living. Everything is easier to deal with if you are in good health. Healthy living not only has a wealth of benefits for health and life, it also helps maintain a positive attitude.
   • Eating well, being active is the way to start your day well. It's hard enough to set a hard-to-reach goal that is disappointing, and you want to give yourself the best chance. Take care of your soul and body before dealing with any bigger problems.
   • If you don't feel comfortable most of the time, tackle the bigger problem first.Using psychological tips, positive thinking and goal setting must be placed behind your health and pleasure.

4. 

   Adjust your goals. As you progress towards your goal, you may want to change your ideal. Record your progress and adjust your goals so that it makes sense.
   • If you are making excellent progress then great! Challenge yourself and set new, harder goals.
   • Don't feel guilty if you don't reach your goal. Reassess and set actionable goals. You don't want to get discouraged and give up.

5. 

   Continue. When you achieve your wishes, don't stop. It takes time to form a habit, give yourself time to get used to a new lifestyle.
   • This will be a lifelong change. At first you may need to make a conscious effort to eat a low-carb diet, or talk, save money, but soon enough, this will be the default in your brain.
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Advice

• It doesn't matter what people think. You do this for yourself, not for others.
• First of all, change begins with consciousness. If you don't understand what you are doing, you cannot change your behavior.
• You can change yourself as many times as you want. Nothing is permanent or irreversible.
• Smile. A smile will help you start your day full of energy.
• Don't hesitate or give up. Please speed up.
• Changing for someone else never works, especially if the person is out of your life. If you decide to change, do it for yourself.
• Travel to clear your mind. You can discover new things or new thoughts to change your way of thinking and personality.
• Remember that you should be anything that makes you happy, if it changes for someone else, it can't last.
• Appearance is a way to encourage internal change (professional clothing encourages you to be more professional) but don't confuse it with real change.
• Persistence. Acting must be repeated at least 21 times to become a habit. The first day will be difficult, but it will be simpler afterward.
• Be yourself, don't think someone is doing better than you because everyone makes mistakes.