Content

• Steps

Rejecting another person's feelings is as difficult as being rejected, especially if the person is your friend. While it is not fun to reject an emotion, it is a natural part of life, and knowing how to say goodbye makes it easier.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Reject someone you know

1. 

   Prepare yourself mentally. If you are willing to refuse to go into a romantic relationship with a friend who has been dating a couple of times or has had a lot of contact with each other, you have to think about the consequences. Make sure this guy / girl doesn't suit you, and accept that your friendship won't be the same (or even end). Make sure to think it through.
   • Think ahead about what you are going to say. Don't just say "No!" but try to explain in a way that is not too ruthless or cold.
   • Choose your words carefully. If you want, you can practice in front of a mirror or with a friend or sibling. Make sure you convey a clear, yet understanding message.
   • Be prepared to adapt to your partner's reaction. You should not read prepared words like reading articles, but improvise according to the circumstances.

2. 

   
   
   Don't hesitate. Naturally, we tend to postpone unpleasant things like this, but waiting only makes things worse. The longer you prolong the time, the more your partner thinks everything is fine, making the farewell unexpected and painful.
   • Pick a good timing - don't pick the person's birthday or the time before an important exam, a job interview - but don't wait forever for the "right time". Act immediately if possible.
   • If the two of you have been in a long term relationship, the above tips will be helpful, but there are certain challenges. See How to Break Up with a Guy or How to Break Up with a Guy for more ideas.

3. 

   
   
   Directly doing it. Maybe you will avoid it by breaking up via text, phone, email, ... but sad news like this should be transmitted directly, even in the technology age. This is important when you are trying to hold onto your friendship after a breakup. Show your maturity and respect.
   • A face-to-face refusal will help you see the other person's reaction at once - surprise, anger, or even relief - and you can adjust your behavior accordingly.
   • Find a quiet, private (or at least relatively secluded) place to talk. No one wants to be denied in the middle of a crowd, or overheard. If you are afraid to be alone, at least find a private corner in restaurants, shopping malls, clubs ...

4. 

   
   
   Allow them to prepare themselves before speaking. When the time is right, don't jump from the topic of how delicious today's noodles are to "I think we should just be friends".
   • Let the other person relax with some pleasant, but moderate dialogue. Leave room to easily move on to a more serious topic without being rude or thoughtless.
   • Smoothly change the subject with sentences like "Nice to meet you, but ..."; "I thought a lot about this, and ..."; or "I'm glad we got to know each other, but ..."

5. 

   Be honest but be kind. Yes, you want to tell the truth. Do not make up the story of you like someone else, reconnect your old love, or decide to join Doan Hoa Binh. If they see you making up a good story and then they know the truth, it will be more awkward.
   • Tell them why you rejected them, but don't blame them. Emphasize on yourself, your needs, your emotions, and your point of view. "It's not me, it's me" sounds stereotyped, but fundamentally this is also a valuable strategy.
   • Instead of "I can't be with someone who lives indiscriminately like you", try saying "I'm just someone who wants an orderly and organized life."
   • Think about your ABCs not matching his / her XYZ, and say you tried, but failed.

6. 

   Give them time to process information. Don't just reason yourself, say goodbye and leave and leave them confused. Give the other person time to understand and respond.
   • If you don't give the other person a chance to speak, they'll think it's not really over yet and still have some hope of holding back.
   • Be sympathetic and let the other person express your sadness, cry, or even disappointment - but don't be too blunt or offend them then.

7. 

   Be strong and don't give up. The worst thing you can do is withdraw your breakup just because you feel guilty or don't want to hurt the other person. You won't say goodbye in the first place if you're not sure what you want.
   • Show your regret, put your hand on their shoulder to comfort them, but don't withdraw your opinion. Just sit still in your position, using statements like “I'm sorry to hurt you. I myself do not feel comfortable, but this is the best for the two of us in the future.
   • Don't be ensnared by the other party by pointing gaps in your argument, promising to change or misunderstanding them. You are breaking up, not going to court.
   • Don't make them hope. Avoid saying things like you're "not quite" ready, or trying to "be friends" (even if you want to, but it's best to leave it for a while). The other person can sense your hesitation and wait for an opportunity.

8. 

   Don't end your conversation in a tense atmosphere. Try to encourage the person and be kind. Let the other person know that they are a good person, just that you don't suit them, there will be someone else who is more suitable. Thank them for the opportunity to get to know each other and wish them the best.

9. 

   Pay special attention when refusing the feelings of someone who used to be you. If you expect you both to remain friends, talk about how you value your friendship, but don't use it as the only excuse. That does not satisfy the wishes of the person who has bet on this friendship.
   • Discuss why the things that make you both bond don't work when you fall in love. Example “I like your open-minded and cheerful, and I'm with you as a way out, but you know, I'm the one who just feels secure with stability, planning, and that's what I need in love.
   • Accept your dilemma. The conversation is going to be difficult, uncomfortable, especially when you finish speaking. Don't make the other party think of themselves as the cause of both of them falling into this situation (“So… this is too awkward, isn't it?). Thank them for being honest with your feelings.
   • Accept that a friendship may be over. The other party has decided that they don't want everything to stay the same so whether you want it or not, you can't turn around. Try saying “I really want you both to remain friends, but I know you need time. I'm ready to talk again when you are ready ”.
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Method 2 of 3: Reject novices

1. 

   Be honest, straightforward, and kind. If it's just the guy or girl you meet at bars, health clubs, high-displacement races ... or the like, we often make up excuses not to go on a date. dating. However, no matter what, you won't see them again anytime soon, so why don't you be honest with each other? The two will be a little awkward, but in the end it will get better.
   • Sentences like “It was nice to talk to you, but just like that is good. Thank you ”would work in this case.

2. 

   Talk to the heart. You won't have the time to prepare like when you break up with your boyfriend / girlfriend, so don't try to explain. Be clear, accurate, and honest about how you don't want a serious relationship with them.
   • Emphasize on yourself. Focus on not being right for the person. You can say, "I'm sorry, but I don't share the same interests with you, so we won't be a good couple."

3. 

   Don't give fake phone numbers or make up stories of someone you love. Act like an adult. Giving fake phone numbers can avoid awkward face-to-face situations, but you will still hurt others, even worse than a blunt refusal. If you want to be kind to others, let that kindness work in the right place even when you're not around.
   • If you really have to use the fake boyfriend / girlfriend trick, then take it as a last resort. Try to refuse honestly, frankly, and kindly first. This always works.

4. 

   Don't joke about it. You might want the atmosphere to be a little less heavy, but if you go too far - like making a dumb voice or a funny face, quoting movies of different types ... then you will make the other person feel insulted. Don't accidentally turn yourself into a rude while trying to be a good person.
   • Be careful with sarcasm. Sentences like "How could someone like me go out with me" with a humorous voice and a sardonic smile will be recorded as you are joking. But in the situation of denying someone, the other person wouldn't know it was a joke.
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Method 3 of 3: Deny a person who refuses to accept

1. 

   Forget what you just learned, if necessary. If you stick with someone who doesn't understand, doesn't accept rejection, or is a pervert who won't leave you alone, you don't have to be kind. Cut everything off quickly and safely.
   • "Sorry, I have no interest in going any further and I just wanted to say that much. Good luck and goodbye."

2. 

   Be careful when lying. If you can make an "emotionless" face, that's fine, otherwise, don't try if you can't lie.
   • Lie a little if needed. A little lie is easier to make than the big show.
   • Give fake phone numbers or fake lovers if needed. Or say, emphasize the subject of yourself “I just want a more committed relationship”, “I don't want to date non-cultural / non-cultural people”, “You look like a brother / sister I'm so".

3. 

   Don't meet up to say no if you don't have to. This is the case when using text or email. Especially if you are afraid the other person will explode or get angry at your refusal, feel free to create some distance between you and them.

4. 

   Don't just ignore the other person and expect them to understand and give up. Many people need a clear, unsuspecting, unaltered, and frank affirmation. Don't be crooked, don't sow any possibilities. Be polite and straight to the point.
   • Don't ignore texts / calls / emails until you've said goodbye. After everything is clear, you can ignore any pleas, complaints or insults.
   • If you are threatened or insecure by someone else, get help or contact someone in authority. There are people who cannot peacefully accept a denial.
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