Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

Trust is an important foundation for a happy marriage. Lying between a husband and wife can make a couple's relationship more strained, and complicate family life. There are a variety of behaviors that you should be aware of when trying to determine if your spouse is lying to you - big or small.

Steps

Method 1 of 2: Finding Physical Behavior

1. 

   Observe excessive blink. This happens when you start asking the person about an uncomfortable topic. If you are talking to your spouse about something they are lying about, they may start to panic. Occasionally, the person who is lying will also reduce the blink of an eye when he is presenting his lie and increase it immediately thereafter.
   • Frequent blinking is a common reflex in this.
   • For example, you could ask your spouse a question, “Have you sent your plane ticket to your mother / me to visit this holiday?”. Perhaps the person you love lied about owning a pretty good relationship with your mother and didn't send in the ticket. Therefore, the person may blink more during the conversation.

2. 

   
   
   Look at the eyes. If your spouse is avoiding or trying to make eye contact with you, he or she may be lying about a current topic or discussion. Lying people often avoid making eye contact, but at the same time, they try to correct this by establishing eye contact over a long period of time. You should use this behavior as your standard metric and combine it with other actions.
   • You can ask him / her, "Did you lose the trophy you got in high school?". The ex may say no while avoiding your gaze, but at the same time stare into your eyes in denial.

3. 

   
   
   Observe if your spouse is doing excessive scratching. Suddenly scratching too much during a conversation could be a sign that your spouse is lying. Sometimes, this is behavior that exhibits an increase in stress levels. The person will scratch at various points of the body.
   • For example, you could ask the person a question like “Are you going to have a drink again?”. The person will scratch his head and deny.

4. 

   
   
   Observe your spouse's restlessness. This is a common sign of lying. Your spouse will not fidget around, move his feet, touch his face, or play with objects he is wearing. The person may also suddenly stand / sit still.
   • For example, you can ask your loved one, "Are you spending your salary in the casino again?". And the person changed seats while denying this.
   • Another example would be when you ask your spouse, “Would you like to go out to dinner with you today?”. And he agrees, but won't do this - while answering you, he is playing with some jewelry on himself.
   • If your spouse is concentrating on his lie, he or she will need more energy than telling the truth, and this can cause them to pause their movements.

5. 

   Take a quick look at your spouse's behavior of swallowing saliva. If the person is swallowing saliva or drinking too much water, he or she is lying. A change in saliva production is the biological response to a lie. This change can be excessive and result in the person swallowing more than once, or happens too little, causing the person to drink more water.
   • For example, when you ask your spouse a question like this "So, your new boss made you work late?". The person may swallow saliva several times or suddenly drink water when in denial.

6. 

   Observe the combination of all signs. Doing one of these behaviors does not mean that your spouse is lying. You can't assume your loved one is lying just because he takes a gulp of water when you ask them a difficult question - maybe they're really thirsty. Instead, you should watch for combinations of all signals. If the person is restless and avoids making eye contact, and you also notice a few clues in his or her words, they will show more dishonesty than through a specific behavior. advertisement

Method 2 of 2: Use Sign Language

1. 

   Seek contradiction. This is the most common linguistic method to help you know that your spouse is lying. Try to use your own logical thinking. If the person hears an unexpected sound, they will look back at the source. So if he says he is just running away without looking in that direction - the person you love is lying. This can be quite difficult if you don't know all the information about the situation your spouse is describing.
   • For example, if you ask your husband / wife, "After sending the children to school, will you go home right away?". He or she will probably say yes. Then, you notice that the vehicle's mileage meter readings double to normal, when the vehicle is not used again. This is a contradiction point.
   • The conflict in another language might be when you ask your spouse, "Did you buy tickets to the concert today?". He said yes, but you know for sure he cannot buy a ticket because you have read the news that the tickets are sold out.

2. 

   Ask a surprise question. Another name for this method is "catching the effect". This can be helpful if you suspect that your spouse lied to you repeatedly. You want to debunk the person by asking him about something that isn't possible or embarrassing him because he was lying in the present moment.
   • For example, your spouse keeps hiding from you about their bad investments and lies about them. You can ask the person in the “Let's go to the bank together and have the banker give us all the specific personal income tax return details”.
   • Another example is when your spouse often lied about hanging out with friends late at night, you could say to him or her, “I bought a ticket so that we can go to the cinema tonight”.

3. 

   Find out details. Notice if your spouse is giving you too much detail or chattering. If your significant other is in an unpleasant situation, or feels guilty, he or she will try to think about how to get out of the situation. The lying spouse will keep chattering about what they did, where they were, and who they go with if they're trying to take care of their lies to hide the truth. .
   • For example, you might be wondering why the person was 3 o'clock late for dinner and he replied like, “I'm driving at rush hour, and an old man is crossing the street, an ambulance trying to get past you, a building block blocking the road, and traffic jam on the bridge… ”.

4. 

   Seek instability in words. This can be expressed through hesitation in tone. These are signs of anxiety when your spouse is lying. If the person hesitates quite a bit, they are lying.
   • An example of this might be in a situation where you wonder where your spouse has been all day and he or she lied to you with an awkward response like “Oh, I / you… um… did go ... Um ... go out with Chau ".
   • A statement with a lot of hesitation or stammering will indicate that the person is lying because a lie requires the concentration of more mental energy than when telling the truth. This is especially true if you ask the person more complex questions - he or she will need time to formulate answers that match his or her story.

5. 

   
   
   Chat with witnesses. One way to catch your spouse lying down is to find someone to challenge what he or she said. Be careful with this method because witnesses are also likely to lie or give out inaccurate information. It is better to talk to a few witnesses to find a more consistent answer. If you ask only one colleague, he or she might say that your spouse is already there - but may also cover up your partner. However, if you consult with two or more colleagues and everyone says your spouse went there, this may be true.
   • For example, you want to know if your spouse is at work during working hours as they say. You can ask a few witnesses who, in this case, are your spouse's co-workers, to find out if the person you love is telling the truth.
   • If two or more witnesses claim that your spouse is lying, you will be able to determine more clearly.
   advertisement

Advice

• Seek advice from a counselor to resolve a more complex dispute between you and your spouse.

Warning

• Lying can bring feelings of suspicion, isolation, and lead to divorce.
• Brawling in front of young children will hurt them emotionally.
• There is no way to accurately detect lies - even if you use a "lie detector".
• Witness statements are often quite contradictory.