Author:
Randy Alexander
Date Of Creation:
28 April 2021
Update Date:
1 July 2024
Content
Friends are an integral part of our lives, cells of society — we confide in them, reach out to them when we feel frustrated, and celebrate with them every time we succeed. . As we grow and develop over time, our friendships also change, but sometimes not in the positive direction we normally would like. You may feel like it's time to stop, or there's no more in common between the two of you, or the friendship has become toxic to both of you and decided it's time to end it. . But, do you know what you must do to end a friendship without creating any deception? This article will help you decide when it is necessary to end a friendship, and when you have made that decision, how to end the friendship as gently as possible.
Steps
Method 1 of 4: Evaluate that friendship
Think about whether you really want to take this person out of your life. Ending a friendship can have a big impact on your life (and that person too), so don't rush to make an angry decision. Instead, take some quiet time to sit down and write down the reasons you made friends with this person, and the things that you no longer liked about the friendship. This will help you find answers to the question of whether or not to continue with this friendship.- Being clear about why you want to end the relationship will increase your confidence in your decision and communicate clearly with your friend.It will help you experience the cessation - the feeling when you do something best for yourself.
- Remember, it's natural and natural to feel distant from someone else, and it doesn't make either of you bad.
Think about whether you want to end your friendship by something you can deal with, or by a big change in your personality. A simple misunderstanding can be the cause of a conflict; Your friend may not even realize what she did to disappoint you. It's also possible that the two of you have changed and don't have much in common anymore - If you became kindergarten friends and are now in your teens, you might have grown up to like and value other things. each other, and not the best fit anymore.- Are you thinking about ending a friendship with her just because she forgot the meeting or said something rude about your boyfriend? Unless this is part of a series of other bad things she has done, letting her know that she's hurting you can heal your friendship.
- If you feel bored with your friendship or tired of spending time with her, your connection is fading.
- If you find the two of you have little in common — you both have a hard time finding things to do together or even talk to — then it's time to stop.
- Is she a considerate friend, sympathetic to others, but sometimes messes with your plans or is always late? Think if the problems you are having can be solved with her to save your friendship.
- Is your friend a shy, socially or goofy girl? Should you find a way to become someone who can help you get through these troubles?
Pay attention to signs that this is a toxic friendship. A toxic friendship is an unhealthy relationship in which you feel like you are being taken advantage of. If your girlfriend is always insulting you, jealous of other friends, or makes you feel bad about yourself every time you interact with her, it may be time to end the friendship.- Can you only hear her voice when she needs something? Does she see you as a free therapist but has never done the same for you, or always asks you to do her homework?
- Was her life just full of negativity? Consider if this is just temporary — maybe she's just going through a tough time. But if this is a common type of behavior, she could be an unhealthy person to be around.
- Does she love to compete, or fight with you or does she cling to you or be too demanding? These are all signs of a toxic friendship.
- Does she do things that get you in trouble? If your friend steals, hurts others, or simply does bad deeds, and it seems that you are often dragged into the mess she causes, then you probably don't have a "destiny" to save you. help her. Put yourself first in this case.
- Think about how you feel after spending time with her. If you feel bad with yourself more often than you think, this is probably an unhealthy relationship.
Give your friend a chance to change. If the good part of your friendship is greater than the bad part, try to talk to him about the things that upset you or hurt you. That problem may not be over yet, and you don't need to end your friendship. Remember that no one is perfect, and there are many ways you can be a better friend too.
- Go somewhere private, let your friend know that their actions are jeopardizing your friendship. Tell him, "I feel very uncomfortable when you flirt with my girlfriend" or "Hey, it's hard to hang out with you when you're always late. Can you try to come sooner? "
- Ending a friendship without giving the other person the chance to change can be extremely painful. If you are a good friend, try to settle the problem between the two of you before deciding to sever the relationship.
Method 2 of 4: Slowly withdraw from friendship
Decide whether it's really appropriate to gradually disappear from the friendship, or if you want to have a frank conversation with your friend. If it's a longtime friend or best friend, this isn't the best way for you to end the relationship completely. If you want to take a step back on the familiarity ladder (either from close friend to friend, or friend to acquaintance), then gradually withdrawing can be effective. But if you want the person you have been with the longest out of your life, you need to have a conversation with her. Even so, start the process by creating small gaps between you and the girl.
- If the person shows up in your life 24/7 (two classmates, playing in groups, and doing similar activities), you may want to try a gradual approach. Telling her straightforwardly that you don't want to be friends with her while she's constantly appearing in your life can create a mess that shouldn't be there.
- If the friendship seems to be in the process of disappearing (like when you two can't spend any more time together), just let it go away. You don't have to tell her that you no longer want to be in this friendship.
- Don't suddenly end an unexplained relationship. Gradually withdrawing from your friendship is different from hiding like a ghost, meaning you ignore her outreach attempts and almost pretend you don't know her. This will make her miserable, confused and will most likely lead to a lot of mischief.
- Note that this can still hurt someone else's feelings. Even if you don't say "I don't want to be friends with you anymore", they can still realize it, feel confused and sad.
Decline all invitations. When your friend wants to make a plan, let her know that you are busy. Homework, family, religious activities — these are good reasons to refuse to hang out. Delay in replying to messages and try not to talk on the phone as often as before. In the case of a must, try to keep the conversation as short as possible.
- Remember, don't do something unpleasant or unexpected with her. You don't want to hurt your friend's feelings, so make things light and say things like "I'm sorry, I have to go!"
- If you feel uncomfortable with pretending to be busy when the person calls, keep busy yourself. Join a club or activity that interests you, not the person. This way, you can meet new friends and have a good reason for being too busy hanging out.
- Spend time with other friends, return to family or venture into discoveries yourself.
Don't share with that person as much as before. If you've ever talked to her about dealing with your dreams or talking to her about family matters, start forgetting those things. Keep the conversation on the superficial level, like talking about things like school activities.
- If she wants to talk to you for hours about her boyfriend, try to find ways to avoid or keep the conversation as short as possible. You can tell her that you're busy and can't talk, or that you only have five minutes to talk before you have to be somewhere.
Don't act unexpectedly on social media. Immediately unfollowing or making friends will make all of your mutual friends aware that you are severing a relationship with her, probably before she knows what's going on. Removing her on social media could make this decision to end this friendship public, and spoil the subtleties of slowly disappearing from her life.
- Instead of unfriending, try disabling her posts on your feed.
Method 3 of 4: Frank
Prepare what you will say. The conversation can get tough, so you will want to write down the reasons why you want to end the friendship, or even write a script to make it all go well. Because you are trying to minimize your feelings of pain, make sure your reasons are outlined in an ingenious way and that you do not intend to blame or accuse.
- You may want to discuss what you will say to a close friend, sibling or parent. That's fine and probably a good idea too, just make sure you discuss it with someone you believe can be kept secret. If she hears from someone that you don't want to be her friend — or worse, from many people — she will suffer.
Sit down with her and say what's going to happen. If it's a very close friend, you owe her a conversation and give her the chance to respond instead of texting or emailing. Be frank (but don't get upset) and don't use any inadequate reasons to keep her from understanding what just happened.
- Choose somewhere quiet and relatively private so she won't be confused by what you have to say (she may cry). The lunch house is not a place to exchange this information.
- Sending a letter or email is often misleading, so try to talk face-to-face or at least over the phone with her. Plus, she can show your farewell letter to others.
- Be polite but keep your opinion. Don't say, "Hey, you've become a bastard and our friendship is over." Try statements like, "Our friendship has become a very negative thing in our life, and I think it would be better if we stopped being friends."
Let her speak her mind. She will probably ask questions and be upset. She may become worried, screaming, angry, or crying. Those are perfectly normal things — let her go through those feelings (unless your friend becomes violent; leave too). After all, the two of you will feel better when there is a chance to say what you need to say, even if it's a difficult thing right now.
- Your friend may regret the way she treated you and tried to save the relationship. If you are ready, the two of you can talk to work things out.
- If the person is trying to lure you into a verbal war, don't be trapped. Don't drag yourself into fights like that. Even if she insults you, don't retaliate.
- Stay with her until she is no longer dominated by emotions. Your friend may be going through a tough time, and you may need to stay with her until she is confident enough to leave on her own.
Method 4 of 4: Dealing with quarrels
Don't "eight" if anyone asks you about what happened. Someone will recognize the two of you as no longer friends and ask what happened. You can respond with generic responses, like "we don't spend a lot of time together anymore", but don't give detailed answers. Saying bad things about someone who used to be your friend is terrible and childish, whatever the reason your friendship has broken.
- If your friend gets upset, spread rumors, or gossip about you on social media, try not to participate in those stories. It's completely pointless to interject a story or protect yourself from someone you no longer want to be friends with. But most importantly, you don't do the same thing to her. If you gossip someone behind their back, sooner or later everyone will know it. Whatever happens, it will be your signal that your choice is correct.
Be polite every time you two meet. You two may feel awkward at first, and the person may be angry or hurt, but treat her with kindness and respect. Remember that this girl used to be your friend — even your best friend —, so respect what you used to be.
- Don't glare at each other with hateful or blunt eyes. Just smile or bow in front of her presence and keep moving. If she tries to talk to you, turn the conversation into a friendly conversation and don't pull the two of you off any limits. Try to keep the story short until she feels like you are no longer interested.
Don't get caught up in any trouble if your mutual friends get into disagreement. The end of a friendship can be impactful if you are part of a certain group of friends. The rest of you might choose to side, ask you two to make up, or even get angry.
- Try not to be upset if your friends feel they are on someone's side. This can happen and will hurt a lot of people, but it's the petty people who live off social scandals, you don't need such people in your life.
