Author:
Robert Simon
Date Of Creation:
18 June 2021
Update Date:
1 July 2024
Content
Social isolation can be a difficult experience, especially for children and teenagers. Lots of people have gone through a period of being marginalized; in fact, your experience is the inspiration for many of the authors' deepest poems and films. Being boycotted is not your fault. Keep in mind that this time will pass and things will get better. At this point, there are a few things you can do to deal with social alienation.
Steps
Method 1 of 4: Coping with social alienation
Talk to loved ones. While it can be difficult, it helps if you have a supportive listener like a parent, a teacher or anyone else. When young people feel grief due to relationship problems with their friends, they should talk to a trusted adult.
- Talk about how you felt about being ostracized.
- The feeling of being heard and understood will make you feel better.
- Talking with an adult will also help you know that you are not alone.
Diversify social relationships. Create a large network of making friends. Usually, when a person is shunned in a community such as a school, that person is still welcome elsewhere, such as a sports club. Participating in a variety of environments will increase your chances of making friends.- Participating in many extracurricular activities that you enjoy will bring many opportunities to make friends. Maybe it's easier to make friends through extracurricular activities because you'll find people with similar interests.
- Focus on hobbies. Join a sports team, sign up for a theater group, take an art class, go summer camping or find an activity that you really love.After that, focus on having fun and nurturing your interests instead of working hard on making friends.
- Improve self-esteem. Through extracurricular activities, you will develop a sense of passion and purpose. When you do what you enjoy and become proficient, you will feel a boost in your self-esteem. People who have self-esteem are often very attractive to others, so when you know how to value yourself, it's easier to make friends.
- Consider making online friends. Nowadays, it is easier than ever to find people of the same age with similar interests. Find websites and clubs related to your interests. However, you must ensure that you use the internet responsibly under parental supervision.
Start slow. Initially, you should just go find a new friend only. Having only one close friend has been shown to strengthen a child's attachment to school and boost their self-esteem. The quality of a friendship is more important than the number of friends. Having a good friend is always better than having 10 acquaintances.- When you meet someone worthy to make friends with, start a conversation with that person. Ask the person about yourself or their interests, or chat about the activities you both participate in.
- After you have talked to your potential friend and become acquainted enough, ask them to do something with you. This can be scary at first, but it's the only way to turn acquaintances into friends.
- Get the contact information of the person who might be able to announce the plan after having invited them out.
- Accept invitations from potential friends.
- Continue to plan and hang out together to strengthen your friendship.
Realize that the end of a friendship is not failure. Relationships are constantly changing in everyone's life. If a friendship ends, especially in childhood or adolescence, it is a sad but unavoidable thing. That is not failure. Accept that some friends will leave your life, but that is also an opportunity to make new friends.
Always be serious and polite. While a friendship ends is normal, the way you end it is very important. How you deal with people who are not friends anymore who are currently bullying you is also very important. Be a more mature person.
- Follow this motto: distance yourself from maturity. No matter what your old friend is doing, or how far away they have become cold, avoid an angry reaction.
- Don't defame your friend to other people or do so online. It only makes you mean and frightens your potential friends.
- In fact, don't waste your energy on a broken friendship or people who are boycotting you. Take a step forward and shift your focus to what's going on in the moment, like new friendships and activities that make you feel better about yourself.
Against FOMO syndrome - fear of abandonment online. Spending a lot of time on social media, constantly reading other people's updates, and being obsessed with the fun things they are doing when you're not around can cause FOMO (fear of being left out). ).
- Realize that people tend to polish their lives online. Your friends may not be that happy. And even if they do, their happiness doesn't mean you have to feel unhappy.
- Realize that virtual "likes" and "friends" cannot equal true friendship. With just a few truly good friends in life, you can be much happier than someone with thousands of followers online.
- Move away from negative social media relationships until you feel better. Stop following content from your friends on social media sites for a while. Instead, you can use this time to do some new activities, focus on your hobbies, and make new real-life friends.
- Be careful what you post online. Anything you post on the web will be there forever. Don't post trivial things about the people who are isolating you. Be a better person and focus on new interests and social groups instead of the people who are alienating you.
Don't personalize things. People are often too focused on their own problems and life so they won't pay attention to anyone else, especially during their teen years.
- People who are isolating you may not realize that they are making you feel abandoned.
- Unless someone is deliberately playing badly, don't assume that everyone is trying to mess with you. Sometimes, the fact that you are not invited to an event is just the way they see it.
- Maybe the person you think they're leaving you just thinks: you don't want to hang out with them. Unless the person is trying to be mean to you, befriend him or her. Maybe that person will become your friend.
- Everything will be better. Most of the isolation occurred during childhood, and the groups would automatically disband when high school was over. Life will get better and you will no longer be abandoned. Always be optimistic and know that you are not alone.
Be honest with yourself. Don't let "popular things" keep you from pursuing your passions and expressing your own interesting personality.
- True friends will respect your independence and individuality.
- Don't let the desire to make friends overshadow your ability to discern right from wrong. Don't do things that make yourself uncomfortable just to make someone fall in love with them.
- Speak up when your friends are doing the wrong thing.
Be a good friend. Those in the "good and distant" group are good friends, whether they have one or a hundred friends.
- A good friend is someone who is respectful, fair, interested, trustworthy, honest, caring, and kind to others.
- So, if you want to have many friends, become the one you want to have yourself. Being a good friend will help keep old friends and attract new ones.
Method 2 of 4: Dealing with bullying
Identify bullying. Bullying is more than just removing someone from a group or teasing others in the usual way, it's a serious problem. Bullying is maliciously persistent teasing.
- Bullying is torture on purpose and can include physical torture, verbal abuse or psychological abuse. This behavior can range from beating, shoving, insulting, intimidating and ridiculing others, to robbing their money and property, for example taking money for lunch or sports shoes from a person. kid.
- Some children bully others by boycotting and spreading bad rumors.
- Bullying also includes using social media or electronic text messages to ridicule or injure others. Cyberbullying is an increasingly common phenomenon.
Understand the reasons for being bullied. Bullying has many reasons. Sometimes, bullies make fun of others because they need a victim to feel important, popular, or in control. Some children bully others because they themselves are bullied by family or friends. They may think that the behavior is normal because in their families, people often insult each other or use violence. Sometimes, the bullies have learned the behavior through popular culture to think it is normal or "cool." Certain TV programs or websites promote the same bad behavior.
Report to adults. Bullying is not something you should deal with on your own. If you are being bullied, tell someone. Most schools and communities have a policy against bullying. When notified to an adult, they will take timely action to combat bullying.Parents, teachers, coaches, principals, cafeteria administrators or other adults can help you deal with bullying. You are not alone.
Talk to loved ones. While it can be difficult, it helps if you have a supportive listener like a parent, a teacher or anyone else. When young people feel grief due to relationship problems with their friends, they should talk to a trusted adult.
- Talk about how you felt being bullied.
- The feeling of being heard and understood will make you feel better.
- Talking with an adult will also help you realize that you are not alone and manage emotional stress.
Find a safe haven. Identify at least five adults for help each time you are bullied. Find a place to be safe from bullies, such as temples, community centers, families, etc.
Stay away from the bully and have an accompanying group. Staying away from a bully and avoiding being alone can be beneficial in the short term. Don't go where you are sure the bully will be, and don't be alone when the bully shows up. Take a friend on the bus, along hallways, in secluded places, or anywhere the bully is at. When you are around many people, you will be safe.
Always keep calm. Bullies will get more aggressive if you react strongly. Stay calm when you're bullied. Don't react by retaliation or mockery. That can quickly lead to violence, trouble, and injury.
- If you cry or get angry, the bully will feel more powerful.
- Practice not reacting. It takes a lot of practice to practice, but knowing how to stay calm in unpleasant situations can help. When you don't react, bullies can leave you alone.
- Calm down by counting to 10 or taking a deep breath. Sometimes the best thing you can do is to put on an emotionless face until it's completely safe.
- Smiling or laughing can make the bully more aggressive, so maintain a neutral and calm attitude.
Set clear boundaries with your bully. Tell the bully that the behavior is not good. Say things like: "I don't like what you do and you have to stop", or "that's bullying and not good at all".
Leave it. Tell the bully to stop decisively and clearly, then walk away. Practice ignoring bad comments, for example pretending to be texting others. By ignoring the bully, you are sending a signal that you are not interested in what the person says. In the end, the bully will get bored and leave you alone.
Notify authorities. If a bully attacks or injures you, notify an adult and the authorities. Attacking someone else's body is an offense. When you tell others, a bully is sure to be punished and unable to hurt anyone else.
Regain confidence. When you are bullied, your self-esteem can hurt. Remember that you don't have a problem; the problem lies in the bully.
- Spend time with friends who make you feel confident in yourself.
- Join clubs, sports or activities that you enjoy to boost your confidence, avoid focusing on negative feelings, and build positive friendships.
- Focus on the positive things in your life and talk to others about them.
Method 3 of 4: Seek help
Talking to adults. If you are being bullied or feel unhappy about being put aside by society, tell a trusted adult. This will help you to express your feelings, and the adult will learn how to help you express your feelings and prevent bullying.
Consider joining a life skills curriculum. If you are having trouble understanding social cues, making friends, dealing with conflicts or any other social skill, ask your parents to enroll you in a class. life skills.
Seek treatment. If you are depressed, anxious, have difficulty at school, have trouble sleeping, are constantly sad or unhappy, or especially when you feel like hurting yourself or others, report it to an adult. immediate counseling / therapy. Coping with depression and bullying is not something you should do alone. advertisement
Method 4 of 4: Find out why isolation occurs
Find out why being isolated hurts you. Humans are inherently social creatures. Much of human success comes from its ability to cooperate and interact with others. From an evolutionary perspective, cases of social alienation and isolation are both negative personal experiences.
Find out why the isolation happens. There are many reasons for isolating others, so it helps if you ask yourself that. Being isolated is not your fault, but if you understand what other people are up to, you probably know how to attract more friends. There are four commonly isolated groups of people:
- The person interferes with the group's activities. From an evolutionary perspective, groups will accept those who bring something to the group. People who interfere with the group's activities may be shunned. Sometimes people are shunned because they behave too hard. However, there are times when people are shunned just because they are different, and people are often afraid of the confusing things. The group needs to learn to see differences in a positive way.
- Who brings danger to the group. Society often shuns aggressive people, threatens the core of the group, untrustworthy people, etc ... It is a way to protect the group.
- Person does not provide a specific benefit to the group. Sometimes a group may feel like they have enough members, so adding people is not of any benefit in general. This has nothing to do with individuals, it's just that the group has no intention of increasing the number of members.
- People who make others jealous. If you have qualities that others don't have, such as being smart, athletic, beautiful, musical, confident or any other positive trait, your presence. can make them remember what they lack. This can cause jealousy. It's their problem, not yours.
Know that social alienation can be harmful. Social isolation has been linked to depression, anxiety, addiction, alienation, poor academic performance, suicide, and even mass massacre. Social alienation can also cause changes in brain function and lead to poor decision-making.
Knowing that social isolation can also be beneficial. Recent research shows that social isolation is also sometimes positive.
- For independent-minded individuals who pride themselves on their uniqueness, being alienated from others reinforces their sense of difference. In such cases, social isolation can enhance the creativity of an independent thinker.
- Being part of a group may not always be fun. Groups can be quite claustrophobic and always in control of a member's appearance, way of thinking, dressing and behave. When you don't belong to a group, you can be honest with yourself and find real friendship with people who don't stifle your creativity and independence.
