Author:
Laura McKinney
Date Of Creation:
6 August 2021
Update Date:
1 July 2024
Content
It is really sad to be gossiped behind by other people. Gossip spreads very quickly, so it is often difficult to determine the source of the rumor. Because of that, it's easy to make the situation worse when trying to confront the people who are talking about you. The best course of action in this case is to ignore it. Besides, you can also cope by engaging in positive activities and trying to change your view of rumors.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Deal with gossipers
No need to do anything. You may feel like you may want to do something or deal with someone who speaks ill of you, but sometimes the best response is to ignore gossip. You just need to think this: the person did not dare to speak directly to you, then why do you have to bother pushing things further? End rumors by ignoring them.
Be kind to them. Another great response to gossipers is courtesy. They will be confused because you treat them so well while they are gossiping behind you. Plus, if you reinforce your positive attitude, you can make the person feel guilty about defaming you.- Praise the person with sincere compliments like “Well, Phuong, you must have spent a lot of effort making these leaflets. Looks very nice."
Keep your distance from gossipers. If you constantly have to be with people who talk behind your back often, keep your distance from them. Even if you can't avoid them, it doesn't mean you have to treat them like best friends.- Be gentle, but don't get along with detractors. Never tell them any private story, as that information may become the subject of discussion later on.
Verify the motives of your messenger. If rumors get to your ears through a precious friend or acquaintance, you probably need to make sure that person is always thinking for you. Most good friends won't want to spread negative information that hurts you. If the person is also involved in the story, find out why they told you, and how they react to rumors.- You might ask questions like "How did you know they're talking like that?" or "What did you say when they talked?" You can even ask a simple question, "Why are you telling me this?" to know more about their motives.
- You don't have to cut ties with the messenger, but you should still be more careful with them. Maybe this person is not carefree as if they were trying to act like that. Maybe they're trying to push the rumor beyond trying to stop it.
Do not participate in gossip. If you've ever been whispered by someone behind you, you probably know how uncomfortable it feels. However, you will not make the situation better if you are the one involved in the gossip. Some people have a tendency to gossip about other people's stories, but they can't do that without people listening.
- Next time, if someone is going to "talk" about someone else, say, "This is starting to sound like gossip. I don't want to talk behind other people's backs. ”
Report to rights holders. If malicious rumors affect your work or school performance, you may have to report the incident to the higher level. Authorized people such as teachers, principals or administrators can handle the problem.
- Say, “I'm having trouble with another student / co-worker. I think they're spreading rumors about me, and this keeps me from concentrating on my studies / work. Can you talk to her? "
- It is possible that the co-worker or student has a reputation for being proficient or bullying, so the supervisor will likely take disciplinary action.
Method 2 of 3: Dealing with gossip
Distract yourself. It can be difficult to stay focused on assignments or work when someone speaks badly behind you. Instead of focusing on negative things, devote energy to positive activities to distract yourself.
- You can rearrange your desk, go for a walk, chat with a friend, or set a deadline for yourself to finish a project.
Spend time with positive people. It is easy to feel isolated when being talked about behind the back. You can counteract this feeling by trying to be with people who like you more. They will make you happier, more confident, and even forget negative lies or rumors.
- Call and invite a best friend out to play. You can also spend more time with your partner or family.
Remind yourself how great you are. The whispering words can make you question your strengths and abilities. Don't fall into the trap of blaming yourself. Instead, think about your great points to remember how valuable you are. Sit down and make a checklist.
- Write down all of your strengths, what you love about yourself, and what others admire. You could list strengths like "great listener", "comforting people", or "creativity".
Do good for yourself. Positive actions bring positive thoughts and feelings. When you are upset with gossip, give yourself the same good things as for a close friend. Do things you enjoy, like taking the puppy to the park to play or polish up his hooves. Take some time each day to be kind to you. advertisement
Method 3 of 3: Change your mind about gossip
Do not mind. You can deal with the speakers behind you by remembering that their words are a reflection of themselves, not your image. You can't decide what others say about you, but you can choose to react to those words. Ignore the buzz as something gossipers themselves have to deal with. Don't let yourself fall victim to other people's problems.
Understand that they may be jealous. This may not always be the case, but more often than not people say bad things about you because something about you makes them afraid. The person may be jealous of your appearance, your talents, or because you are liked by many people. Malicious words may just be one way for them to hurt you.
Recognize poor self-esteem. Another thing that people who slander about others has another thing in common is their lack of self-esteem. They may say badly about you to feel better. The person often feels dissatisfied with themselves or lacks self-esteem, and as a result, they also say negative things about others.
- This is why treating you well or complimenting the person who spread the rumors can help stop negative comments. Such people sometimes simply want to receive positive attention, because they feel inferior in their hearts.
