Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 3: Understand immature behavior
• Method 2 of 3: Dealing with an emotionally immature person
• Method 3 of 3: Respond to aggressive immature behavior
• Tips
• Warnings

Like it or not, we will all eventually meet (perhaps in a work or volunteer situation) an impossibly immature person. It can be detrimental to your emotional life, your social life and your entire perspective. With some understanding, self-control, and practice, it will become easier to deal with such a person.

To step

Method 1 of 3: Understand immature behavior

1. Consider the age of the person. The word immature means "not fully developed". By nature, the person may not understand how to respond to certain situations. The younger the person is, the more difficult that understanding can be. Be aware of juvenile immaturity.
   • For example, a young boy can be immature by making fun of breasts and penises, making fun of his friends, picking his nose, and generally acting like a child. While unpleasant, this may just be normal behavior for someone their age, and you should probably ignore it. Allow younger people the space to grow up and mature before you react angrily.
   • On the other hand, an adult who appears otherwise mature (i.e. someone who has left the fart jokes behind) may still lack emotional maturity - think disregarding others, not being able to blame his or her own accept her mistakes, or try to deliberately make you jealous or angry.
2. Learn to distinguish emotionally mature and immature responses. Extreme situations can sometimes lead to emotionally immature reactions, something called age regression, which can blur the line between adult and childish emotions. Respond more thoughtfully if you notice someone reacting immature. There are several ways to determine whether the reaction is an adult or a childish / immature emotion.
   • A person who is emotionally immature will be reactive, see themselves as a victim, react emotionally (intense or impulsive reactions, such as explosive anger, sudden crying fits, etc.), be self-centered and engage in self-protection, always taking their own actions for themselves or justifying others, being manipulative, motivated by fear or the feeling of 'having to' do something, and the need to avoid failure, inconvenience, and rejection.
   • A person who appears to be emotionally mature will be open to hearing the perspective of others, be proactive, be motivated by growth and act with a vision or purpose, act because he or she chooses it (not because he or she feels he should ), acting with integrity (which means that acting in line with your own values).
3. Understand why a person can be emotionally immature. People who are emotionally immature often find it difficult to deal with their emotions and often experience some form of learned helplessness, or the feeling of being unable to change their own situation or improve their own life. This may be because that person has never learned how to face and handle difficult emotions. While the immature behavior is inappropriate, it can help to understand it better if you realize that the other person is acting out of fear, the feeling of having to protect themselves from these uncomfortable emotions.
4. Acknowledge potential mental health problems. The person you are dealing with can suffer from ADHD or a personality disorder. Some conditions of this type may appear immature and manifest in different ways.
   • A person with ADHD may just seem "immature," but actually has a neurodevelopmental disorder. He or she may have trouble concentrating and talking excessively, appear bossy or interrupt conversations, respond verbally aggressively with frustration, or have trouble controlling their own emotions, which in turn leads to outbursts of anger or tears.
   • Borderline personality disorder is often accompanied by strong mood swings.
   • People with antisocial personality disorder are often unkind and lack the ability to respect your feelings.
   • Someone with theatrical personality disorder can be very emotional to get attention, and feel uncomfortable when he or she is not the center of attention.
   • Narcissism occurs in people who consider themselves overly important and have a reduced ability to empathize with others, resulting in vulnerability that could lead to outbursts.

Method 2 of 3: Dealing with an emotionally immature person

1. Understand that you cannot force someone to change. The truth is, this isn't your fight to fight - if the person isn't willing to recognize their behavior and take steps to change it, there's little you can do. It can be extremely difficult for an emotionally immature person to realize that he needs to change, because a hallmark of emotional immaturity is that you blame other people or circumstances for your own bad behavior.
   • The only thing you can control is your own behavior - how you respond to the person, and how much time you spend with them.
2. Try to limit your contact with the person. Depending on the severity of the person's immaturity and his or her willingness to change, it may be necessary to avoid contact. If the immature person is your partner, you may have to end the relationship if your partner isn't willing to change. If the person is someone you can't remove from your life, such as a boss, coworker, or family member, try to limit contact as much as possible.
   • Keep contact with the other person as short as possible. Apologize for cutting off the conversation and say something like, "I'm sorry to shorten this, but I'm in the middle of a big project and I really need to get back to work."
   • Do your best to avoid the person in a social setting and talk to your other friends or family members.
3. Communicate assertively. An emotionally immature person can be manipulative and self-centered, so if you need to communicate with them, try to be clear and assertive. Assertive does not mean aggressive - it means being clear, respectful and saying what "you need" while at the same time respecting the needs, feelings and wants of others. In short, indicate what you need and let go of the outcome.
   • Understand that even when you communicate about your needs in an adult way, the immature person does not always respond in an adult way.
   • Learn more about being assertive by reading this wiki: [Being Assertive | Being Assertive]].
4. Talk to the person. If you think the person is open to feedback and is someone you'd like to keep in your life, try talking to them about their behavior. Prepare for a defensive attitude on the part of the other person, which can make it difficult to get your message across. You could even suggest that the person talks to someone else about the immature behavior and how the person can do something about it.
   • Name the behavior that is immature and how it affects you. For example: "It gets too much for me if you don't help around the house anymore. Would you please help me every week? "Then give the person specific things each day he / she can do to help.
   • You could remind the other that change can be very difficult, but you want to be there to help them grow and mature if they want to.

Method 3 of 3: Respond to aggressive immature behavior

1. Ignore the person and focus on something else. This is the easiest way and the simplest response when the immature person is trying to get your attention or a response. By responding to the behavior, you give in to what the other wants and reinforce their immature actions. Ignoring the person will likely frustrate them because the attack on you has failed and cause them to give up.
   • If the immature person loses patience or tries to argue, it is important that you disconnect from the person's attempts to upset you.
   • Look away from the person. Turn your head or eyes away. This is simply not acknowledging the person's presence.
   • Turn your back on the other. Even if the other person then circles around you to look you in the eye, you turn around again.
   • Walk away. Move with a purpose, avoiding the other as quickly as possible until they stop following.
   • Try to ignore because you are clearly busy. Talking to or bothering someone when the person is on the phone all the time is very difficult. You will become so absorbed that you will not notice the other.
2. Ask the person to leave you alone. If the person doesn't see a reason to quit or leave, you may need to be a little confrontational and make it clear that you don't have time for them. Gather all your courage and politely ask to be left alone, while at the same time removing yourself from the toxic environment. Try one of the following approaches:
   • Quickly pennant him or her by being direct: "Please leave me alone right now. I'm in a bad mood. "
   • Get to the point and say what you want: "Leave me alone."
   • Take charge: "I don't feel like a discussion. This conversation is over. "
   • Use the skip plate technique. Simply repeat your refusal by saying over and over, "This conversation is over." Keep calm while applying this technique and try to walk away.
3. Inform the person of his or her actions. The person may not realize that they are acting immature. Part of growing up is learning to interact with younger and / or less mature people. Confronting the immature person who is harassing you and letting them know that such behavior is inappropriate may cause the person to avoid you.
   • Being straightforward might help, "I don't appreciate your behavior. Stop it.'
   • Simply make the other person aware of their own behavior: "You act very immature. Stop bothering me. "
   • Formulate your answer as a question: "Do you realize how immature you are behaving now?"
4. Resist the urge to fight fire with fire. While you may be tempted to respond immature to the person and give them a taste of their own medicine, this can seriously backfire. If you're dealing with this person in a work situation, your immature behavior can get "you" into trouble. In addition, it can even be dangerous to irritate an immature person who is also aggressive or short-tempered. If you feel tempted to respond to the person, be the adult person, withdraw, and stay away from the other person.
5. Get help. If the person is aggressive and doesn't stop bothering you, see a lawyer or the police. No one should bother or touch you. These people need outside intervention to stop bothering you, and they will likely stop until someone is able to exert influence that they cannot ignore. There are a few possible options:
   • Use your social support network. If contact with the person is unavoidable, find a friend, family member, teacher or mentor, boss or someone you trust and ask for help.
   • Tell the person that you are going to call the police. The threat from the authorities can intimidate him enough to stop bothering you.
   • Call the police. If you fear for your safety and / or the person harasses you, threatens you, stalks you, or is violent, the police may be able to intervene, or you can report the matter to the police. Make sure to take detailed notes on each incident so you have a record of the harassment and how long it has been going on.
   • Examples of harassment: threats, repeated phone calls, text messages, e-mail, notes or other contact, following someone, blackmail, cutting car tires.
   • Consider requesting a restraining order. Laws vary from country to country, but you can talk to the police or a lawyer about your options when it comes to applying for a restraining order.

Tips

• Take a deep breath. Don't cool your anger on this person, or you've sunk to their level and let them win.
• Don't act impulsively. Whatever happens to you, take a moment to make a decision or say something.
• It is important to process the disagreements and still stay calm. Don't raise your voice. Quietly let the person know that you don't want to argue, but perhaps talking about the matter can help. Apologize if you started yelling, for example. Be sincere and it can break down their defense enough to make logic come back in the other person's response.

Warnings

• There is a difference between a person who generally doesn't act his or her age and someone who is an abusive bully. If you feel like you are being bullied, seek other help.