Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 2: Discuss things with your girlfriend
• Method 2 of 2: Show non-verbally that you care about your girlfriend
• Tips
• Warnings

Seeing someone you care about feeling bad can make you feel very helpless. This is especially common in romantic relationships. Feelings and emotions are then more often blown up. There could be several reasons why your girlfriend needs to be comforted. She may be sad or angry about something she's been through. Or maybe she's just had a bad day and needs a strong shoulder to lean against. The best way to comfort your girlfriend depends on the girl herself and the bond you have with each other. It all starts with simply being there when she needs you. That gesture will already mean a lot to her.

To step

Method 1 of 2: Discuss things with your girlfriend

1. Be there for her as soon as possible, both emotionally and physically. If you're in a relationship and your girlfriend feels bad, it's important that you make it your top priority to be there for her. Getting to her quickly might be just as important at that point as actually being there. This will make your girlfriend feel like you really care about her. And that alone will probably make her feel a little better.
   • It makes a lot of sense that you can't always let everything fall out of your hands and rush to your girlfriend. You will have to consider the seriousness of her situation in relation to the things in your own life that are important to you. For example, if you are at work or school and your girlfriend calls you because her grandfather has passed away, there is no doubt that you should go see her right away. But if the situation is less serious, you can also offer her support at that time by giving her a call. Then let her know that she is very important to you, but that you also have other responsibilities and cannot just leave them behind. Make an appointment with her to visit her after work or school.
2. Ask her why she's feeling bad and listen. Until you know exactly why your girlfriend is feeling bad, you can only offer comfort on a small scale. Whether the reason is a small thing or something that turns her life upside down, offering comfort starts with listening carefully to what she has to say. It is also important to be empathetic and to feel for her.
3. Be a sounding board for her emotions. The best you can do is give a listening ear. If she can tell her story while being listened to, chances are she will come to an insight on her own.
   • Don't try to suggest solutions when she tells her story. Help her identify for herself what she is feeling sad or angry about. Let her express her emotions while you are empathetic.
   • Listen to her actively. Get in the habit of repeating what she said to you. Show her that her feelings and what she has to say are all you care about right now.
   • It is difficult to show empathy when you are partly focused on your own thoughts. You can also share your own thoughts and feelings with her, but only if she asks about it.
4. Make her laugh. Laughter helps against stress and to clear your mind. Laughing together can make mental and emotional problems seem less serious and easier to overcome.
   • If you have a good relationship with your girlfriend, you will probably already make her laugh on a regular basis. Humor is a strong medicine for stress and grief. In addition, a good laugh can also distract her from her problems and make her feel less bad for a while.
5. Make it clear that she has nothing to be ashamed of. On top of the sadness or anger your girlfriend is dealing with at the time, she may feel extra bad for being ashamed. Especially if you haven't been together for long, it can be difficult for her to show you her emotional vulnerability. If you think this is the case, pull her close and let her know that it is normal to feel this way at times. Let her know you trust her never ever will harm.
6. Stay calm. Remember that the focus must be fully on your girlfriend and her feelings and that you are there at such a time to reassure and support her. This can be tricky if you are one of the reasons she feels bad. In that case, try to put your own feelings aside for a while until your girlfriend no longer feels bad. If you become very emotional yourself and start sharing your thoughts and feelings with her, it will only make the situation worse. And in the end, you did little to make her feel better or comfort her.
   • If you feel bad about the situation yourself, keep it to yourself and focus on her feelings. Discuss your feelings another time when she feels less bad.

Method 2 of 2: Show non-verbally that you care about your girlfriend

1. Approach her on her terms. When meeting up with your girlfriend, it is important to respect her boundaries. It makes sense that you want to show affection when your girlfriend is angry or sad, but maybe your girlfriend isn't in the mood for this right now. If a girl is really upset about something, she probably doesn't feel like cuddling. When meeting your girlfriend, give her space without being distant. If she needs a hug or a kiss, chances are she will indicate this herself.
   • If you've been with your girlfriend for a while, you may be able to gauge her behavior in certain situations. For example, if you have been able to comfort her in the past by hugging her, chances are that she will enjoy this again.
2. Maintain an active posture. When talking to your girlfriend about her feelings, it is important that you show her that she has your full attention and that you really listen to her. You can do this by adopting an active posture. Make regular eye contact, lean over, nod your head, and smile when appropriate. All of this will show your girlfriend that you care.
3. Buy her a present. Getting a gift can do someone surprisingly good in times of stress. While a bunch of flowers will of course not solve the problem itself, it is a sign of love and affection for your girlfriend. The symbolic meaning of a gift can make your girlfriend feel better.
   • A gift can make your girlfriend feel better. But this should go hand in hand with a good conversation and show her that you are there for her.
   • Think carefully about which gift is appropriate for the specific situation. Buying her the latest version of her favorite computer game after her father's death is not an appropriate gift. When in doubt, you can always give flowers as a gift. They are suitable regardless of the situation.
4. Offer a handkerchief if she has to cry. Offering a handkerchief when someone is crying is a kind gesture. Crying can be embarrassing, even in front of someone you are very close to. A handkerchief doesn't make crying any less embarrassing, but it does help dry the tears. And if your girlfriend is wearing makeup such as mascara, a handkerchief will also help wipe away the smeared makeup. She will probably thank you for it later.
5. Hug her. Chances are, your girlfriend has already crawled into your arms herself to find comfort. If not, it's a good idea to give her a hug yourself at some point. A good hug has proven positive effects on people who are sad. During a hug, your stress level and your blood pressure are lowered, making you feel more comfortable.
6. Cuddle up while cuddling. Snuggling together while holding her tight is good medicine for most emotional problems. When your girlfriend is upset about something, there is usually nothing better than snuggling up after everything has been said. Even if she still feels a little bad after a good conversation, there are many advantages to huddling together. For example, it can help her feel comfortable, healthy and happy.
   • If you're snuggled up together, you might be able to watch a fun movie with her. Something light-hearted and perhaps funny is usually the best choice in this situation. Watching a movie can distract her mind for a while and that's nice. It can also help to let her feelings cool down a bit if she is very emotional.

Tips

• It goes without saying that the best way to comfort your girlfriend is when you are actually with her. Preferably over the phone or chat. When you're with someone, you can do more for someone. But this is of course not always possible. Maybe you live far away from each other or it may be in the middle of the night. It's especially important that you act quickly if she's feeling down. So do what you can for her at that moment, with the means you have.

Warnings

• While you should of course always be there for your girlfriend when she needs you, you should also realize that you can't solve every problem for her. Sometimes it's just impossible to make someone feel better about something serious. In that case, the only thing that can make the situation better is time. The only thing you can do for her is not a solution, but above all offer support.
• Be careful not to make your girlfriend feel like she has to suppress her emotions. This will only make her feel more annoying in the long run.