Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 2: Learn good one-liners
• Method 2 of 2: Choose your moments
• Tips
• Warnings

If you keep being served up by someone and you want to give them a taste of your own medicine, then you would do well to plan a little in advance. Try to find his / her weaknesses, keep your cool, and answer confidently so that you never get distressed again. Read on to learn how.

To step

Method 1 of 2: Learn good one-liners

1. Insult someone's appearance.
   • "You look like the before picture!"
   • "Did you exchange your neck for an extra chin?"
   • "Was anyone else involved in that accident?"
   • "I just saw someone who looks exactly like you, but I had to buy an entrance ticket for that."
   • "Maybe you can eat your makeup so that you look a little more beautiful inside."
   • "What if you comb your hair in front of your face."
   • "I would put on nicer clothes if I were you, to take the attention away from your face."
   • "It's no longer carnival, so get that wig off your head."
2. Insult someone's intelligence.
   • “We already think you're an idiot. You don't have to keep trying to prove it. ”
   • "It's pretty sad to see you trying to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence."
   • "What a long, lonely journey it will be that the thoughts take in your head."
   • “Surprise me. Say something smart. ”
   • "I've heard my dog ​​ruffing smarter things."
   • "When I'm right next to you, I can hear the sea."
   • "You are as slow-witted as dog poo, but you are only half as useful."
3. Insult someone's lack of money.
   • "You are so poor that you don't even get credit from the food bank."
   • "Do you hang all your toilet paper outside so that it can dry and you can use it again?"
   • "The last time you smelled a hot meal was when I just farted."
   • "Are you going to bring those clothes back to the morgue when you're done with them?"
   • "You are so poor that you cannot afford to pay attention."
4. Insult someone's attitude.
   • If someone says you're ugly, say "Hey, this can be fixed with a little make-up. That dark soul of yours can't beat that."
   • "Here, eat this lipstick and you will be more beautiful inside."

Method 2 of 2: Choose your moments

1. Try to find their vulnerabilities. What is the person you want to diss proud of? What is he / she ashamed of? Finding out their weaknesses can help you create a plan ahead of time. This way you can diss them as effectively as possible. Choose things they are proud of.
   • If the person teasing you always dresses well, or seems incredibly proud of their Nike sneakers, think about the clothes they normally wear and prepare for some insults related to their clothing.
   • If the person is a bad learner or a big boob, insulting his / her bad grades or intelligence can be a good way to get back to him / her.
   • Sport is often important at school. If you are being distracted by a sporty type, you can insult him / her with his / her football blunders or granny-like dribbles.
2. Keep your cool and laugh about it. A table is meant to make you angry, so practice with your poker face. If you are offended, pretend that you are not hurt at all - regardless of what is said. Chuckle a little and let the dish slide down your clothes. When you see the tease coming your way, think about something else. Plan in advance what to say so you don't have to listen to them.
   • Focus on a funny feature, such as his / her nose or ears. This way you can distract yourself while he / she is speaking. If he / she has a pimple, stare at it. It may even make you laugh.
3. Wait for the right opportunity. It is probably not wise to duel with a good “disser”. If you can keep your cool when you get offended first, then the ball is yours. Wait for the right time to burst out with your well-thought-out insult.
   • If you opt for the dress tactic, wait for them to wear new, fashionable clothes and say you like their new shirt. Then say, "The guy who picks up the garbage bags from us also has a shirt like that."
   • Wait until gym class to wear down his / her athletic skills. If he / she trips or falls, start laughing and pointing and try to get your friends in.
   • If you are going to insult his / her intelligence, wait until you have to read bully out loud in class. When you get the next turn, you can imitate his / her reading style. After a while, switch back to your regular voice and say, “Oh, forget. I'm not an idiot, of course. ” If they give a wrong answer to math, mumble something like, "Thus Einstein." Just don't say it out loud, make sure only he / she can hear it. If there are several people around, your teasing ghost is guaranteed to feel embarrassed.
4. Act as if your insult is not an insult. You can break through the defensive positions by confusing your tease spirit. To do that, give him / her the feeling that you genuinely want the best for him / her, and feed him / her information.
   • After class, ask very seriously if you can tell him / her something. Then say something sincere like, “I didn't mean to say this in front of everyone, but your pants smell like a grease trap. I almost went over my neck. Maybe you should give your mother a call to ask if she can bring a new one. ” Make the insult as specific as possible. Pretend you're doing him / her a favor.
   • Tell him / her that you heard the soccer coach say that his / her free kicks remind him / her of a toddler's, then ask sincerely how he / she feels at the club.
   • Tell him / her that you would like to help him / her with his / her math homework for fifty euros an hour, if his / her parents can afford it.
5. Consider keeping him / her dead. Sometimes silence is the best meal. Banishing someone completely from social situations can be very effective if you already have a lot of friends yourself. Pretend you're talking about him / her when he / she approaches you, then ignore everything he / she has to say. Do not look at or talk to the person.

Tips

• Don't do this if there are people around who are close to your teasing ghost. If you do, they will try to stand up for him / her.
• Think of things they know they can't answer.
• If they say something funny, just ignore them. Pretend you haven't heard anything.
• Try to ban them from your friends. This way he / she is guaranteed to appear uncool and unpopular.
• If you know they are stronger than you, try to get someone who gets higher marks to diss them for you.

Warnings

• Don't start diss yourself. Don't insult people without good reason. If you do, you are a bully.

↑ https://www.leukespreuk.nl/spreuken_dissende_zinnen.htm