Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 4: Make a call
• Method 2 of 4: Start a conversation
• Method 3 of 4: End the conversation
• Method 4 of 4: Leave a message
• Tips

Losing sight of people is an unfortunate part of life. Especially when you get older and meet more people, it is difficult to keep all your relationships going. If you lose contact with someone, be it an old friend, a former coworker, or an ex, you can decide to reach out to them and see how they are doing. This can be daunting, but it is often easier than you might expect. If you've been thinking about this person, chances are you're still on their mind and they'll be happy to hear from you!

To step

Method 1 of 4: Make a call

1. Find the person's phone number. If you haven't spoken to this person in a while, you may have lost their number. Check if you have it in your phone or address book. If you no longer have the number, there are several options:
   • Ask a mutual acquaintance. Consider asking a mutual friend or colleague for this person's number.
   • Contact this person via social media. If you are friends on Facebook or connected through another social media site, you can send a message. Say something like "Hi Lucy! I was thinking about you the other day, I hope everything is going well there in Chicago. My number is [your phone number] if you want to catch up. "
   • Search online through a search engine. If you don't have mutual acquaintances and are not connected to the person in any way, search online. There is a good chance that you will find some information that you can use to get in touch with him or her.
2. Call at a good time. If you know when the person is free, call them at that time. If you are unsure, do not call extremely early in the morning, or after 9:00 PM. Also, avoid calling the other person during the hours when most people are generally at work or school, between 9am and 5pm. The best time to call is on weekends in the afternoon or between 6:00 PM and 9:00 PM on weekdays.
3. Tell who you are. When the person answers the phone, greet them and tell them who is on the line. If the two of you haven't spoken to each other in a while, they won't expect you to call, especially if they don't have caller ID. Say something like, "Hi Gert, how are you? It's Nicole from Damwoude ".
   • It's a good idea to mention what you know each other from. If it has been a long time since you two have been in contact, they may have met other people with the same name and will not immediately know who you are. If you provide context, it will be much easier for them.
4. Explain why you thought about the other. Something must have prompted you to pick up the phone and call this person. Even if there is no specific reason, include what prompted you to call the other person. Saying something like that makes your conversation seem less out of the blue.
   • You could say something like, "I just reread the book you gave me last year, it reminded me of you!"
   • You can even just say, "I was thinking about you the other day."
5. Apologize for disconnecting if necessary. Sometimes people lose sight of each other. But if you feel that you should have stayed in touch better or that it is partly your fault that the contact has been watered down, then you should report it.
   • Say something like, "I'm sorry I let the contact water down after the wedding!"
   • One apology is enough - if you keep going, it can make the other feel uncomfortable.

Method 2 of 4: Start a conversation

1. Ask how the other person is doing. Simply ask, "How are you?" This gives the person an opportunity to tell you how they are doing and what they have been up to since the last time you spoke. Instead of worrying about what to say next, listen carefully to what the other person has to say.
2. Ask a follow-up question. You are probably curious about something they told you about and you want to know more about it. Asking about it is a great way to keep the conversation going.
   • For example, if they say they now teach at a university, ask them which subject.
   • If you can't think of anything to ask, ask about previous shared experiences. For example, if you were friends in high school, ask if the person has kept in touch with any of your other old friends.
3. Tell us what you did yourself. After the person has updated you on what he / she has been up to since the last time you talked, you can share what you have done yourself. Tell about work or school, but also about important developments in your life. You could name things like new pets or hobbies you have.
   • For example, say, "I actually just moved to Austin, Texas and I work for a non-profit organization."
4. Include any reason you are contacting the person. You may have a reason for calling this person right now. For example, you can call to ask for donations for a fundraiser, or to ask to borrow something. If you are calling for a specific purpose, please state this in the conversation at this point. If you're just calling to get back in touch, keep the conversation going.
5. Bring back memories. A good way to revive a conversation with an old acquaintance is to reminisce. Talk about the memories you share, or the place or people through which you got to know each other.
   • For example, if you are childhood friends, say something like, "I remember we used to make chocolate chips together."
   • While it's safer to stick to happy memories, you can also tell them how their friendship helped you. You could say something like, "It meant a lot to me that you were there after my mother passed away."
6. Don't forget to smile. When you talk, remember to smile. Many people forget to smile when on the phone, but just smiling can make your voice sound friendly and inviting. Since they can't see your face, the tone of your voice is paramount in making it clear that you really enjoy talking to the other person.
7. Avoid awkward topics. You don't want to make the conversation awkward by asking difficult questions or mentioning topics to avoid. This is especially true for exes you want to get back in touch with.
   • Saying something like, "How is that guy you dumped me for?" Will make the conversation awkward for both of you.
8. Don't stay on the phone for too long. You're probably excited to get back in touch, but make sure you don't let the conversation go on too long. You don't know what this person's schedule is these days, or how busy the other person might be. Don't think that you need to catch up with the other person about absolutely everything that has happened to you since the last time you spoke, and that you can always talk again soon.
   • Fifteen minutes is good enough to get back to you. However, if the other person would like to keep talking, keep talking!

Method 3 of 4: End the conversation

1. Indicate that you enjoyed talking. If you feel like the conversation is over or if one of you needs to go, say something like, "It was really nice talking to you again" or "I'm glad we got back in touch." shows you how much you enjoyed talking to the other person.
2. Make plans. After the interview, you can decide that you want to meet this person. If you feel like meeting in person, say something like, "We need to see each other again." You can go a step further if you want and ask them to do something specific, like go out for lunch or have coffee.
3. Indicate that you would like to stay in touch. If you don't feel like meeting this person or if you live in different places, but still want to talk every now and then, say something like, `` Let's try to keep in touch. '' You could also be more specific by saying, "I'll call you next week" or "I'll call you after my trip to Puerto Rico and tell you how it went."
4. Say hello. After you share how much you enjoyed getting back in touch, it's time to say goodbye. Since you've already ushered in goodbyes, you can say something simple like, "Okay, well, we'll talk again soon. Take care of yourself. "This is a good way to say goodbye.

Method 4 of 4: Leave a message

1. Greet and say your name. It is possible that this person is not present at all and that you need to record something. When you leave your message, start the same way as if the phone had been answered by saying hello and saying who you are.
   • Say something like, "Hi Marco, it's Deborah from Law School!"
2. Express your hope that he or her is well. After saying your name, say something like, `` I hope you are doing well '' or `` I hope you and Claire are doing well. '' This is a fun way to show that you care about the wellbeing of the other and you can ask how they are while leaving a message.
3. State what prompted you to call. If you have a specific purpose to call, such as if you need a favor or want to ask a question, please include it in the message. If you're just calling to get back in touch, say something like, "I was thinking about you the other day and thought I should call you." It doesn't have to be an elaborate reason or story; you just have to indicate that you had to think about the other.
4. State something about yourself. Say a few sentences about how you are and how you've been. Say a few basic things related to how you spent your time. Keep it short and don't keep going, or you may seem more interested in yourself than the other person.
   • For example, say something like, "I did well. I just got a new job as a social media coordinator and started playing tennis again. "
5. Ask the person to call you back. Say you are sorry it took so long and ask for a call back. Make sure to leave a phone number and the best time to call you.
   • Say something like, "Call me back when you are free and so we can catch up! I'm usually off in the evenings, maybe that's a good time for you. "
6. Say hello. Say goodbye soon after you have finished providing your contact information. A good way is like, "Okay, I hope to talk to you soon, goodbye."

Tips

• Take a few deep breaths before calling. This will make you less nervous.
• Always speak loud and clear, especially when leaving a message.
• If the person doesn't seem very excited to talk to you, don't take it personally. People change and some people don't see the point of maintaining friendships if everyone lives in a different city.
• If you and the person were in a complicated relationship, it may make you feel a little uncomfortable. Know that this is normal, especially for conversations with exes.