Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: Take Action Against Harassment
• Method 2 of 3: Get help with the stalking
• Method 3 of 3: Protect Yourself
• Tips

If someone is constantly threatening you, stalking you, trying to sexually harass you, or refusing to leave you alone, you need to learn to defend yourself. Start by telling the person that you don't like their behavior and asking them to stop. If the harassment continues, take action (for example, get the police involved and improve your security). In some cases, you may need to apply for a restraining order to keep the annoying person away.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Take Action Against Harassment

1. 1 Point out this behavior and state that it is unacceptable. Clearly point out to the stalker specific things in his behavior and tell him that it is inappropriate to behave this way. For example, say: “Don't whistle after me, this is an insult,” or: “Don't touch my bottom, this is sexual harassment.”
   • Criticize the behavior, not the person. Tell him that you are worried about his actions ("You are standing too close"), but do not blame him as a person ("You are such an idiot"). Do not swear, do not call the person names, do not humiliate him or do other things that may exacerbate the situation unnecessarily.
   • Do not make judgmental statements such as “I would prefer / would rather not be touched by you”. This may entail follow-up conversation. Indicate alternatives as needed, such as “You are standing too close. Please give me a meter of personal space. ”
2. 2 Tell the person to stop contacting you. If the person continues to behave inappropriately, it may be time to stop communicating. Tell him to stay away from you and that you will no longer reply to his messages. Make it clear that if he continues to stalk you, you will take action to stop him.
   • You might say, “Your behavior makes me uncomfortable. Please do not contact me again. If you don’t stop, I’ll call the police. ”
   • Do not enter into dialogue with the persecutor, do not argue with him or answer his questions. You don't need to react to attempts at a change of topic, questions, threats, accusations, or attempts to make you feel guilty.
3. 3 State the boundaries for the person you see often. If you can't avoid meeting the bully (say, someone from school or a work colleague), try to establish boundaries that are appropriate in your situation. For example, tell the person to stop “hanging around” at your table or coming up to you at lunchtime.
4. 4 Stop answering his calls, emails, and other messages. If the person tries to reach you, do not return their calls, emails, or messages. At this point, you have clearly outlined your position, so if the person continues to contact you, they openly violate the boundaries you set.
5. 5 Remove the stalker from your phone contacts and social networks. This way, you make sure that he no longer has access to you or information that you share with other people. Remove the person from your phone contacts and block this number if possible. Remove him from friends on VKontakte, Twitter, Instagram and other social networks.
   • There is a chance that the person will try to knock on your friend or follow you again under a different name. Carefully research new connections and verify people's identities before accepting any request.
   • If a person published a post that humiliates you, you can mark the post and draw the attention of the administration (Vkontakte, Twitter and others) so that this post is removed.

Method 2 of 3: Get help with the stalking

1. 1 Keep records of the pursuit. If you continue to be harassed, keep a record of every incident that occurs. At this stage, the actions of the stalker may be considered illegal, and if he continues like this, you will need to involve other people. Having evidence in this case can be helpful.
   • Save all emails and messages you receive, especially those related to breaking any boundaries you set. Take notes of all significant dates, such as the day you asked to stop contacting you, and keep any records to prove this.
   • Write a report of the incident, noting the date and location of each incident.
   • Save the names of other people who witnessed the persecution in case you need to ask them to verify what you wrote down.
2. 2 Talk to the administration at school or at work. You don't have to deal with the persecution alone. Talk to your teacher, school counselor, principal, HR, or someone else you can trust.
   • Most administrative bodies have guidelines according to which they will act in the event of persecution. If the person in question is a student or employee of a given organization, the involvement of the administration can put an end to his behavior.
3. 3 Write a statement to the police. If the persecution has reached an alarming level and you no longer feel safe, contact the police immediately. Explain what is happening and provide any evidence you have. Try to stick to the facts in your description.
   • Find out the details of the police officer who answers your call. This will help strengthen the chain of evidence if you need to call again in the future.
   • If you are reporting harassment in messages or in virtual reality, it is best to ask for an appointment with someone who is involved in such investigations.
   • Keep in mind that the police are unlikely to do anything at this early stage, but having an official statement will help create a story of your complaint. Sometimes people who persecute others are found to have done so before. If the perpetrator has a record of harassment, the police are more likely to take action.
4. 4 Get a restraining order. You can also get a restraining order to protect yourself and your family from the bully. You need to petition for a restraining order. This petition will be handed over to the persecutor, and then a court hearing will take place, during which the judge will determine the specific protection measures that the prohibition on approaching will provide. You will then receive an injunction document, which is best kept close at all times in case the person violates the order.
   • An injunction usually states that the stalker cannot contact you or approach you within a specified distance.
   • If you are in immediate danger, you can get a temporary restraining order that will prevent the person from lawfully approaching you or contacting you, at least until trial. Keep detailed records and, if necessary, notify the police each time the perpetrator violates an injunction.
5. 5 Ask the telephone company to arrange for call tracking. If someone is stalking you over the phone or SMS, call the phone company and ask them to set up tracking. This feature allows the operator to track phone calls from the stalker number.
   • The telephone company can then share this evidence with the police.They can also use this information to track the stalker when needed.

Method 3 of 3: Protect Yourself

1. 1 Trust your friends and family. Going through this experience alone is dangerous and frightening. It is important to tell the people in your life that you are being persecuted and that you fear for your safety. Make sure to keep them informed of their movements every day so that they are ready in case of an emergency.
   • Let your loved ones know if you are out of town or need to skip work.
   • Make sure these people know not to give the stalker any information about you.
2. 2 Ask someone to stay with you. If you live alone and feel unsafe in your home, ask a friend or family member to stay with you. This may seem like an extreme step, but it can help you gain peace of mind. In addition, you must always take threats from the stalker seriously: if he fears that he will harm you, he may try to do so!
   • Reach out to a friend or relative, saying, “I am afraid to sleep here alone. Can you come? ”.
3. 3 Report violations of an injunction immediately. Whenever the stalker violates the terms of the injunction, report it to the police. They will keep a record of every violation. Violating an injunction is a crime, so it is possible that the stalker will face criminal charges.
4. 4 Do not advertise your location and daily habits. If you are an avid user of social media, it is probably time to stop showing your daily habits or stop using these services altogether. Even if you removed the stalker from your friends, he may find a way to spy on your account using someone else's account.
   • Don't use FourSquare or other apps that tell people where you are. Turn off the location recognition feature on your phone when you are in social media apps.
   • Do not publicly declare that you are leaving the city or that you will be alone for a while. Try to avoid situations in which you may be vulnerable to attack, such as not walking alone at night.
   • To feel more comfortable, change your schedule a little every day. This will make it harder for a potential pursuer to track you.
5. 5 Enhance the security of your home. Change door locks and other security measures throughout your home. Perhaps you should choose a vandal-proof lock that will make it difficult to enter the house through the door. In addition to securing doors, consider other security measures:
   • You can install motion sensors that will light up when someone walks near the house at night (if you live in a private house).
   • Consider installing security cameras around your property.
   • You may also consider purchasing an alarm system that will alert the police if an intruder enters your home. In a way, a dog can also be a great “safety system”.
6. 6 Learn to self-defense skills. You will feel more secure and confident knowing that you can protect yourself when needed. Take a self-defense course where you will be taught how to prevent an attack, escape, and defend yourself if needed.
   • Look for self-defense courses in your area. Many organizations, such as law enforcement agencies, often conduct free self-defense trainings for local residents.
   • Consider wearing personal protective equipment such as pepper spray or a knife.
7. 7 Protect your online privacy. Certain communication sites may collect personal information from you, such as your home address, work address, email address, and telephone number.This can help a potential stalker locate your location. Look for information about yourself on the Internet and on various sites and ask to delete it.
   • Also, monitor your bank card activity to detect any unusual activity.

Tips

• Harassment can include unwanted sexual harassment, receiving threats over the phone, emails, messages or other forms of communication, harassment or visits, and surveillance of your home or workplace.
• Harassment can take place at school, at work, on the Internet, or in other public places. If you are being persecuted, be aware that this behavior may be criminalized by the authorities.