Content

• Steps
• Tips
• Warnings

The psychological component of abuse is very insidious. If your husband is physically or mentally abusive, you do not need his permission to divorce. Stop enduring insults and constant control on his part, take care of your physical and psychological safety and be prepared for the fact that your life will take a new course.

Steps

1. 1 Tell your husband that you have the right to make your own decisions.
2. 2 Think about where you will go after and what you will be doing. You must have a plan. Nobody forbids dreaming of a better life. Break the plan down into small, easy-to-do things: a short period is to get out of a difficult situation safely, a long period is to find a suitable job, and so on.
3. 3 Ask a shelter or women's center for help. Your appeal will be strictly confidential. Some institutions also provide assistance to mothers with children, or at least send them to another institution. Also, through such organizations, you can get legal assistance from a lawyer. If you are in need of a vocational training program, you can also get help. You may be helped with child welfare or an intermediate residence until you find a permanent one. Here you will always be welcome and you will be safe.
4. 4 Prepare a plan of action without telling your husband or someone who can talk about it. Try to make sure he doesn't suspect anything. Do not try to leave the phone number of the shelter on the table. If you are looking for information online, be sure to delete your browsing history before exiting.
5. 5 Get professional support. There are people in shelters or women's centers who can help you. Abuse usually leads to a collapse of self-esteem, and your reasoning becomes flawed. You need to seek help from a person who knows what to do in such situations and listen to his advice. Naturally, even knowledgeable people sometimes make mistakes. You need to learn to put your welfare first, and for that you need to get out of the control of the abuser. Don't let him take over your life.
6. 6 Remember, it is your life that is at stake. If your husband is physically abusive, the situation will worsen over time. Of course, he can promise that this will never happen again and the situation will stabilize for a while, but do not forget about the cycle of things in nature, soon everything will happen again. After being beaten, you can live in constant fear, you can become mentally disturbed, your body can be mutilated, or worse, abuse can be fatal. What is the use of his promises? If you are afraid of being harassed after your divorce, you can go to court and ask for a protective order. Such an order is a guarantee that your husband cannot approach you and / or children for a certain number of meters. To find out how to get a warrant, contact your local police department or a lawyer. You will need proof of abuse, although a sworn statement usually works as well. A restraining order, like a promise from a spouse, is not 100% guaranteed to protect you. If your spouse has violated the court order, you can contact the police for help, but in some cases it may be too late. Promises and documents should not replace common sense.

Tips

• Collect enough money and open a separate bank account in your name.
• It will be much easier for you if you have a plan and a place to live. But, if you feel that you are in danger, run without delay!
• Write down all the necessary numbers, passwords and the like on paper, or online, for example in Google docs.This way, you will have all the information you need at your fingertips and you will not need to return home.
• Tell your friends about the abuse and come up with a secret code so they can report it to the police.
• If you trust family members, enlist their support as well. You may feel uncomfortable and embarrassed to ask for help, but do it anyway. If they are unable or unwilling to help, do not give up.
• Be practical. Take responsibility. Don't be a victim. Believe in yourself. Seek help from a psychologist and soon you will be able to get on the right track and recover from the experience. Give yourself some time.
• Let your friend or relative keep track of what is happening. Don't hide your bruises and bruises, let everyone see. This is direct evidence that you are being abused.
• Many good companies provide assistance to their employees in these situations.

Warnings

• If your life hasn't turned out for the better after your divorce. Perhaps after the breakup, your financial condition will deteriorate, but you will be able to move on. There are many social programs in the United States that provide social assistance.
• If you are suffering from physical abuse, contact the police. First, you will need to report the abuse and remove the beatings. Local authorities can also help with temporary residence. Never put up with abuse. In most cases, the violence gets worse and women subsequently lose their lives.
• Under no circumstances, do not believe that God or the Bible will condemn your intentions and actions. If believers tell you otherwise, prove your case.
• Even if you believe in love and a wonderful future, this is only an illusion. You cannot change another person, you can only change yourself.