Content

• Steps
• Tips
• Warnings

Are you one of the people who can go anywhere and talk to a new acquaintance for five minutes, but deep down in your soul you feel lonely? These emotions can hurt your heart. Research has shown that people (especially women) who feel lonely in a company are more at risk of heart disease. Here are some methods to help you deal with loneliness. The result is a healthy relationship and a healthy heart.

Steps

1. 1 It should be understood that it is not quantity that matters, but quality. Irrelevant, how much people you know. What matters is how good you know them. And more importantly, how well do they know youand whether they know you at all.
2. 2 Understand your needs. We all have a decent amount of trauma and injury as we grow up. When we turn 40, we lose the openness we had at the age of 4. We have learned to keep certain things out of our hearts. It `s naturally. But it is quite another matter if you close in yourself to such an extent that you become unable to "make friends" with other people. At the end of the day, you close in on yourself completely.
3. 3 You need to find out what prompted your withdrawal in the first place. Maybe you were used or despised by people who were supposed to take care of you. Maybe your classmates rejected or mocked you. Maybe you feel different from others because of certain physical or mental disabilities, gender, race or social status. These events and emotions have serious consequences that you will have to deal with. The good news is you don't have to fight alone.
4. 4 Seek help. Find a therapist to talk to about past events. Yes, it may seem unfair that you ask a professional for help, given the fact that this heavy burden is not your fault at all. You have tried to help many, despite the fact that you are not a professional. If you start telling your life story to a stranger, you will end up crying and complaining about fate. You know from experience that this behavior scares people away.
5. 5 Don't wait for others to show their emotions. If you find that you feel lonely even among people, you most likely have good social skills, but you also lack close, trusting relationships. You are an introverted person and, moreover, you wait until the other person starts a conversation that will lead to deeper communication. Maybe your friend notices that you are discouraged and insists in a conversation to find out the reason and the opportunity to help you. Say something like, "Hi, I have a difficult life situation right now. Let's talk about it? I think I'll get better."
6. 6 Don't be so sensitive. The same goes for confidential conversations. If you find that you tend to pick up on the nuances of the other person's mood, say something like, "You look miserable today. Did something happen?" You shouldn't take everything to heart to such an extent that you forget about your needs. Any relationship is a two-way road.An adult should be able to express a bad mood. It does not happen that a person constantly captures the nuances of his acquaintance's mood.
7. 7 Learn to speak No. Sometimes we feel lonely because we feel used up and squeezed out. Maybe you are a good listener and people come to cry all the time. to you in a vest. And after that, they easily go to have fun with other people. Yes, it hurts! The next time someone wants to cry on your vest, tell that person directly No... You may think that you are being rude, but in reality you are just defending your interests. You will most likely lose friends, but to begin with, these people were not your friends. They reached out to you when they needed to cry or complain. It is worth finding a place for people in your life who care about you and are in close relationships with you.
   • If the above advice is at odds with your principles, read How to Deal with Victim Syndrome.
8. 8 Treat yourself well. If you are happy, it will be seen from the inside. Happy people attract others.
9. 9 Open up. It can be scary sometimes. If you open up to other people, you are guaranteed to get even more emotional experiences and wounds. But openness is the only way to communicate and deepen relationships. Start a conversation. Tell us what you did last weekend; what films have you watched; what books have you read ... When you feel comfortable, start digging even deeper.

Tips

• Communication with people around you does not mean that you should forget about yourself. If you've come to a social event alone and feel more comfortable sitting down and having a quiet drink, that's fine too.

Warnings

• Being alone and being alone are two completely different things! Attending various clubs and activities will not solve the problem of loneliness. Such a step will only deepen your suffering.
• If you find yourself constantly talking about negative things in a frank conversation, read the article on how to be optimistic.
• Being good about yourself means you are “your own best friend,” but such an opinion will lead you to stay. the only one friend to myself. This is what you want to avoid. The fact remains: if you feel bad about yourself, why should an outsider feel good about you?