Content

• Steps
• Advice

No matter how hard you try to cover it up with a smile, the jealousy is always there, in you. It can even go out of control and become jealous or even depression. So before it gets swallowed up, what can we do to get rid of it? Learning to stop comparing yourself to others, appreciate what you have, and practice the following tips to change your outlook can help you deal with your jealousy in a timely manner. Learn more to learn how to overcome your jealousy.

Steps

Method 1 of 5: Understand What Is Envy

1. 

   Understand the difference between jealousy and jealousy. They are not the same, but are often confused in use. The distinction between jealousy and jealousy is very important in defining your emotions. Jealousy is your reaction to the risk of losing something of yourself. Jealousy is a response to what you think you are lacking.
   • For example, jealousy is when you find a girlfriend flirting with another guy. It's time to see a friend in a brand-new sports car.

2. 

   
   
   Think about the harmful effects of jealousy. How does jealousy have a negative impact on your life? Maybe a long-term relationship is in danger of breaking down because you can't be happy with your best friend any longer, and so you've been avoiding her calls. Maybe you're obsessed with checking your ex's Facebook just to stare at pictures of him and his fiancee. Maybe you get jealous when you read a photo blog of a classmate, wishing you were as artistic as him. These are all examples of how jealousy that causes you to waste your effort can be better spent on more positive things. It can harm you in the following ways:
   • Do waste your time
   • Makes you unable to think about anything else
   • Destroying personal and professional relationships
   • Destroy your personality
   • Create negativity in yourself

3. 

   
   
   Identify why you feel jealous. Before you can deal with jealousy in a constructive way, you need to clarify the reason behind it. If you're jealous of your friend's new sports car, take time to ask yourself questions to determine the cause.
   • For example, do you want a similar car? Or is it because his ability to buy expensive things makes you jealous?

4. 

   
   
   Write down your comments. Writing is a great way to express your feelings and deal with negative emotions. Writing can help you start to better understand your jealousy and, thereby, cope with it. Start by writing down why you feel envious. Describe the source of your jealousy in as much detail as possible. Try to identify the reason you are jealous of someone.
   • For example, you could write about your friend's use of a new sports car and what makes you feel. What was your mood at that moment? When he brakes, stops, how do you feel? What did you want to do / say? What did you really do / say? How do you feel when he leaves? Come to think of it, what is your mood now? What do you want your feelings to be?

5. 

   Consider talking to a friend about how jealous you are. Talking with a supportive friend or family member can help you express your feelings and feel better. Choose someone who doesn't have much to do with the person you envy. Also, make sure that the person supports and listens to you. Choosing someone who doesn't care or doesn't give you good support can make you feel worse.

6. 

   If you cannot get rid of jealousy on your own, consider the help of your doctor. For some people, envy can affect happiness and everyday life. Without help, understanding and determining the best way to cope with these emotions can be difficult. A licensed psychologist can help you understand and overcome them. advertisement

Method 2 of 5: Turn Envy into a Positive

1. 

   Stop judging yourself harshly. Envy often comes from dissatisfaction with oneself. You are always interested in how others get what you want, career, partner, career or intelligence. These desires are rooted in how you feel about your shortfall. Try not to be so harsh on yourself and you won't be tempted to unfairly compare your conditions with others.
   • For example, maybe you envy your friend's uplifting career while you are still in the early stages. Be more patient with yourself - keep working, and it will be your turn to succeed.
   • In general, jealousy comes from hasty judgment - that this better that and make decisions based on what you don't have. Try to be more open-minded instead of having prejudiced views about which qualities are good and which aren't.

2. 

   Forgive the person who makes you jealous and forgive yourself. Forgiveness is an important part of overcoming envy because being angry at someone for their success will only make you feel heavier. One way to help you deal with jealousy is to declare forgiveness to the person you are envious of (not present, of course) as well as to yourself. Simply take some time alone and say forgiveness.
   • Remember that it's not like you forgive others for doing something wrong. You choose to stand in their shoes and see the problem. This allows you to genuinely sympathize with their pride and their sense of accomplishment.
   • For example, you could say things like: “I am proud of Trang when she can be so successful in her career. I also forgive myself for being slower than her in my career path ”.

3. 

   Turn envy into recognition. To overcome jealousy, it is important to appreciate what you have and what others have achieved. You can start by changing your perspective and learning how to recognize the success or fortune of others. Train yourself in the habit of being happy for others when they achieve or have something that makes you jealous. For example, try to be happy for your friend when he buys a new sports car and moves from envy to fans.
   • Speaking of admiration can help. For example, you could say to your friend, “Congratulations on the new car! I am really happy for you and your success ”.

4. 

   Use jealousy to set goals for yourself. Once you've identified the source, you can deal with your envy constructively by turning it into something positive, such as a goal. Using it to create realistic, achievable goals will help you stop sinking into negative feelings and feel energized to make your life a better place.
   • For example, if you are jealous of your friend's new sports car because you wish you had the financial freedom to buy such items, set a goal to make money and / or save more. .
   • Divide your big goals into smaller, measurable ones. For example, if your goal is to earn and / or save more, one of your smaller goals would be to find a job with a higher salary or find promotion opportunities in your current job. Another small goal might be saving VND 400,000 per week.
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Method 3 of 5: Avoid Comparison

1. 

   Live on your own definition of success. Do you judge yourself and others based on superficial thoughts about the definition of success? Success doesn't have to be about a villa, a car and a powerful position, or being so beautiful that others can't help but look. Success is finding out which life is best for friend and enjoy it to the fullest. If you are less concerned with social standards of success and instead focus on the things that make you happy every day, you will no longer compare yourself to others.
   • Remember that it's all right to be on the ladder of your life unlike someone else. For example, just because you may not be able to find a job or a suitable partner does not mean that you are inferior to the person you envy. Life is not a list of things we need to accomplish in order to achieve happiness. Everyone has their own path, and no path is more important or better than the other.

2. 

   Realize that you don't see the full story. Looks like someone has everything - perfect boyfriend, great hair, just the way you name it. However, the story always has more than that, because no one can have a perfect life. If it seems like someone has everything you want, you probably have a few surname want. Do not put others on high and angry that they must be led by a lucky star. You may not be able to tell what their weaknesses are - after all, most people are accustomed to hiding their flaws - but know, they always exist.
   • Know that everyone has enough struggles, needs or wants to remind everyone that everyone is equal. Digging deep into other people's weaknesses is completely unnecessary! Rest assured there are always things you can't see, try to get rid of your jealous thoughts and focus on yourself.

3. 

   Remember that the success of others does not affect your success. For example, an acquaintance starts an exercise program, loses 10 kg and completes the first marathon. Of course she has achieved a great feat but it doesn't stop you from doing the same! Your success in life does not depend on the success of others. Whether it's finding love, getting a good job or anything else, you can get it no matter how successful someone might be. advertisement

Method 4 of 5: Gratitude

1. 

   Focus on talent and what you have. Now that you've stopped comparing to others, focus on yourself. Focus on your positive qualities to become better and better in what you do and who you are. When you work hard to perfect a cello or write a great essay, there is no time left for you to care about other people's work.
   • When you find that your mind is moving towards what you don't have, deliberately try to think about what you don't. really have. Always do it every time you sense signs of this jealousy. By stopping yourself from getting into jealousy and focusing instead on the things that make you special and wonderful, you will begin to have a much more positive outlook.
   • Realize that not everyone has what you have - in fact, the talent and the things that belong to you can even make others jealous.

2. 

   Be grateful for the people you love. Think about those people who are always interested and willing to do anything for you, and think about what you want to do for them. Caring for the people who depend on them for your full life is a positive way to get rid of your feelings of envy. Instead of feeling inadequate, be grateful for their presence in your life. This is very close to satisfying. It's about focusing on the present and focusing on what's good now, instead of thinking about the shortcomings in life.

3. 

   Change when possible, accept the things that cannot be changed. It is important to know what you can do and what is out of your control. Work hard to improve what you can change and don't waste your time with the things out of control, because there's nothing you can do to change them. If you dwell on the immutable things, in the end you will become extremely negative and possibly even depressed. Time is limited, and you don't want to waste it on past work.
   • For example, if a friend's musical talent makes you desire and your greatest desire is to become a songwriter, do your best to achieve it. Put your soul into composing, taking vocal courses, performing at open music nights (where audiences can sign up for performances) - do your best. If you think there is a chance for you to succeed in music, or if you just feel so passionate about it that you want to spend your whole life singing, don't let anything stop you.
   • On the other hand, there are also things in life that hard work and a strong desire cannot help. If you fall in love with a friend's wife and they are a happy couple, you will have to accept that this is something you cannot change. It is very important to accept reality before jealousy becomes extremely negative.

4. 

   Spend time with precious people. If you're playing with the kind of person who regularly compares work, spouses and kids, complains about their failures and lowers those who get them, you should probably start spending time on others. If you hang out regularly with someone who doesn't appreciate what they have, you will become like them. Be with those who are happy with themselves - not the I-better-than-you type, but happy enough not to stab others or make constant comparisons. Make friends with non-judgmental people who are superficial, generous, and kind, and then you will begin to feel the same about yourself and others. advertisement

Method 5 of 5: Change Look

1. 

   Start a gratitude diary. If you haven't thought about the good things in life in a while, grab a pen and a piece of paper, and start writing about them. A gratitude journal is a great way to change the way you look and appreciate what you have. If that's not your style, you can also try using a video blog (such as a vlog) or sketching. Since jealousy stems from an obsession about your shortcomings, take time and effort to remind yourself of what you got. Here are some ideas to use in your journal:
   • Your talent
   • Points that make you most proud of your looks
   • Best friend
   • Your dog
   • Favorite food
   • Things that make you laugh
   • Memory makes you happy
   • Future plans that you are looking for
   • Favorite objects
   • Achievements have been achieved

2. 

   For a day, just think about the positive things. If you're a jealous person and just keep it all to yourself, you probably don't need this trick. However, if it eats into your personality and makes you more negative than you would like, try to go through a day without complaints. It's not something you can do forever - it's okay to be annoyed by something at one point or another, after all! - but stopping complaining for a day can help you realize how often you are making negative statements. If you barely keep your mouth open all day, the experience is worth contemplating.
   • When done, stop every complaints - including complaints about yourself. Don't be low on yourself, unfairly compared to others, or wish things were different.
   • You may find that when you complain, you are also influencing others. It's not fun being around someone who only sees the bad side of the matter. Modifying your life attitude can help improve your relationships.

3. 

   Stay away from the negative factors for a week. The "negative factor" is anything that increases your jealousy and makes you wish for things that you cannot or cannot have. The more haunting it is, the worse your mood will be. So try to stay away from it for a week and see if you feel better. Here are some examples of negative factors:
   • Advertisement. For example, constantly watching ads for expensive and unaffordable clothing can make you jealous of people with nice clothes. Advertising worsens your jealousy. You may have to stop watching television and reading novels instead of fashion magazines for a week.
   • Social Network. If you feel satisfied by the "humble" shares when surfing Facebook, you are not alone. In fact, research shows that jealousy increases with Facebook. If you surf Facebook or social media regularly, try to stop using them for at least a week.

4. 

   Remind yourself that you are in control. If you are constantly jealous of other people's things, remind yourself that you are too may get them, just you Selection don't do that. For example, if you really want a brand-name closet, you can use up your credit limit, but you probably don't want to because you know how to spend it reasonably. When making the right choices (like avoiding credit), you should be proud of these decisions.

5. 

   Praise five people a day. Try to do it with five new people every day, so that you don't compliment someone over and over. Praise a person based on the things you really admire about him or her - don't go simple and give too shallow compliments. Taking the time to figure out what you really like about others and saying that will help you to have positive thoughts. You won't have to worry about comparing yourself to others like before.
   • Research has shown that complimenting the person who makes you jealous can be beneficial. Find ways to praise their efforts and contributions that make you feel valued.

6. 

   Volunteer. If you can't turn your mind away from thinking about what you can't have, spend time helping people who really have nothing. Sometimes our minds are confused and cannot see how lucky we are. Awaken yourself by volunteering at a charity kitchen, hospital or animal shelter for the day. Then, reflect on your experience. Helping others helps you see how rich you are and how much your ability to do good in the world. advertisement

Advice

• Do your best to resist the urge to compare yourself. Focus on improving yourself instead of becoming like others.
• See jealousy as an opportunity for self-improvement, not a reason to feel bad about yourself.