Content

• Steps
• Advice

Talking to a dying person is never easy. The most important thing is that you need to offer love and your presence instead of worrying about how to fill your silence or to present your perfect statement. While it can be difficult to spend time with the person, it can even give both of you time to enjoy sincerity, joy, and shared love.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Understanding What to Say

1. 

   Honesty and kindness. You don't have to pretend like your loved one is healthy, or even act like things are getting brighter when the truth is not. The person will appreciate your honesty and openness and won't want you to behave like everything is okay. However, you still need to treat your loved one with kindness and make sure you are vigilant about his or her needs. You may not know what to say, but at this point, be sure to tell your loved one as much as possible that makes them feel better.
   • Some individuals and cultures are often uncomfortable talking about death. If your loved one is one of them, avoid talking about this topic.

2. 

   
   
   Ask if you can help them. Another thing you can do when you talk to your loved one is to ask what you can do to help them. This could mean doing some chores, calling them on the phone, or even picking up a snack for them. Perhaps the person wants you to give them a hand massage, or perhaps just wants to listen to a joke; Don't hesitate to ask about what you can do to ease their grief. The person will think that they will bother you if you ask for help, so speak up first. If the person really doesn't need your help, accept this and move on.

3. 

   
   
   Encourage them to talk if they want to. The person you love will want to revisit old memories and will want to share a story or an idea with you. You just need to be there for them and let them know that you care about what they say. If they are unable to think clearly or forget what they want to say, you can help. Encourage the person by making eye contact with them and asking the right questions after they speak.
   • If the person is provoking yourself by talking, you can ask them to slow down or take a break. But in general, the person has the right to talk, so allow them to be the leader of the story.

4. 

   
   
   Don't mention painful topics. Although you need to be honest and open to the dying person, you can also hide some elements if necessary. Sometimes being too honest will only make the dying person feel your pain and lose control because there is nothing they can do to stop it. For example, if your mom asks you if you and your brother are still mad at each other, it's best to say that you are both mending even if you are just in the beginning. this; In this case, giving the other person a little reassurance is better than telling them about the harsh truth.
   • When you look back on these harmless lies, you won't regret it.However, you may regret being too honest for the moment that you could have made it better with a harmless lie.

5. 

   Be aware of other person's cues during conversation. You might think that when someone is dying, everything has to be dignified, but your loved one might not. Maybe they just want to spend their last days laughing, talking about college football, or telling funny old stories. If you're trying to make things more serious, the person will want you to change the topic from time to time to improve your mood. It's up to you to joke around, tell funny stories that happened to you in the morning, or ask the person if they want to watch a comedy. Improving your mood can bring joy to a stressful situation.

6. 

   Don't stop talking, even if the person doesn't respond. Hearing will often be the last thing to stop working when the person dies. You might think communicating with someone who is in a coma or resting is useless, but they will hear everything you say very clearly. Just the sound of your voice is enough to bring them peace and comfort. Say whatever you think, even if you're not sure if they can hear it. Your words should be enough to make a difference, even if the person you're talking to doesn't immediately respond or can't hear you.

7. 

   Know what to say if the person is hallucinating. If the person you love is living in the last moments, they may experience hallucinations due to medication or disorientation. In this case, there are two things that you can do. If the person is seeing some rather unpleasant element and is frightened or hurt by it, you can gently coax them back into reality by saying that it is not real; but if the person sees something that makes them happy, there's no reason for you to tell them they're just hallucinating; allow them to enjoy their comfort. advertisement

Part 2 of 3: Know What to Do

1. 

   Don't force yourself to say perfect things. Many feel that they need to say the right thing and show love for the dying person in order to bring them peace. Though this is a pretty good thought, if you take the time to try to form the perfect words, you may lose your precious moment. Talk without being too shy, and make it clear to the person how much you love and care for them.

2. 

   Listen. You might think that the best action you can do for a dying person is to say things that make them feel better, but actually, sometimes, the best thing to do is listen to them. . Your loved one may want to revisit the past, share their thoughts on their last day of life, or even laugh at a recent event. You don't have to interrupt or express wisdom or your thoughts. You just need to look them in the eye, hold their hand, or devote yourself to them mentally and physically.
   • Make eye contact or hold the person's hand while they are talking. You don't have to say too much to show them that you are listening.

3. 

   Live in every moment. You will probably worry if this is the last time you have a conversation with that person, is this the last time that person calls you by the name "worship", or if you will be able to continue. Have fun with that person. Although this is normal, you can hold on to these thoughts until the end of your visit so you can focus on the present, enjoy every moment with that person, and not let yourselves be. anxiety prevents you from focusing entirely on the person.

4. 

   Sometimes, you should try to hold back the tears. While you will be overwhelmed by grief, regret, or even anger, you should not show this face to the dying person. While you shouldn't lie and act as though you fully accept what's going on, don't talk to the person with puffy eyes and a sorrowful spirit every time you meet the person, or otherwise, you will only upset them more. Find ways to bring joy and optimism to the person whenever possible. Your loved one has enough to worry about, and constantly trying to comfort you about their imminent death won't be what they want.

5. 

   Remember that actions speak more than words. While it is essential to talk to the person and be there to listen to them, keep in mind that the most important thing is that your actions demonstrate the level of concern you have for that person. This means that you should visit the person as often as possible and check in with them every time you are unable to visit. It's watching movies, reviewing photo albums, playing cards, or doing whatever the two of you used to love doing together. In addition, it is present every time you say you will come and show your love in every action you do. advertisement

Part 3 of 3: Understanding What to Avoid

1. 

   Don't wait until the last minute. Maybe you have complicated feelings for someone who is dying, and your relationship is not very good either. However, it's best to talk to the person before it's too late. When the person you care about is dying, even if you are in a difficult relationship with that person, this is not the time to try to "balance the score" or "get it right and wrong". , but when you need to be there for them. If you wait too long to start talking to the person, you are losing your chance.

2. 

   Remember to say "I love you". When you have mixed feelings toward a dying person, you can forget about this important word. Even if you haven't shown it to the person in the past or have not used them for years, try to expose them while you can still spend meaningful time with that person. You'll regret if you can't find the right time to say this. Stop looking for the perfect moment and just be honest with your feelings.

3. 

   Tell the person what they mean to you. Talk about your favorite memories or the strengths you built up with them. This may be emotional, but the person will want to know about it.

4. 

   Should not give false guarantees. You will want to tell the dying person that everything will be all right. The person certainly knows your physical condition and will appreciate it when you try to help them without painting the truth. Focus on being present for the person rather than giving them false hope when the end is near.

5. 

   Let them know the good news. Your loved one still cares about you and wants to know about your life. Sharing the good things in life with a dying person will help them feel happy about being a part of your life. Plus, if the person is leaving this life soon, he or she will be more relieved to know that you are having a lot of good things in life.

6. 

   Avoid saying tasteless sentences. Although there are times when you may not know what to say, you should try to avoid saying things like "Everything is God's will", or "Everything happens for a reason". Unless the person is religious or they use this word as well, this statement could be frustrating. It would even sound like the person deserved to leave and suffered for some reason and no reason for them to fight or feel angry. Instead, focus on enjoying the present moment with the person instead of trying to come up with why the person is in this situation.

7. 

   Avoid giving advice. If your loved one has only a few days or a few months to live, this is not the right time for you to voluntarily give them medical advice.The person may have tried everything and considered every option, and this conversation will only feel frustrated, hurt, and rude. At this point, the person just wants to be at peace. Giving other health advice will only be stressful or frustrating for them.

8. 

   Don't force the person to talk. If they are very tired and just want to enjoy your presence, don't force them to talk. This is completely different from trying to make a sad friend happier, and your loved one may be feeling physically and emotionally exhausted. While you will want to build up the conversation or think it is better to talk than to be silent, allow the person to decide whether or not to speak. You do not want them to use too much energy during trying. advertisement

Advice

• Be gentle and sympathetic, but not sentimental.
• Discuss the disease and medical treatment if desired. Their lives will be centered around these factors and they may be their primary concern.
• You can possess strong views of the afterlife, resurrection, reincarnation, divine existence, religion, etc. You should not talk about them unless you know that the dying person shares the same beliefs, and most importantly, should not try to impose them on them. Don't make yourself the focus.