Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

It is easy for people to ignore their fears and hope they will go away, but unfortunately that rarely works. If you don't, eventually those fears will take control. Is there a way to cope with them? The most common way to deal with this is contact therapy, which means you will gradually come to terms with things and situations that make you afraid. With the right thinking method, the results will be so surprising that you have to ask yourself why you didn't do this earlier!

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Thinking through

1. 

   Know that you are not unique. There are thousands - even millions of people who may have very similar fears. For example, over 50% of Americans fear animals move by crawling (snakes, spiders, insects)! Blaming yourself or feeling ashamed of your fear won't help you get over it. On the contrary, realizing that fear is an ordinary human emotion, you can find the strength to cope with it.
   • You can also search online for support groups for your particular fear. How do others handle and overcome their fears? What can you learn from them? And, of course there is always wikiHow. What does one of these articles tell you?
     • How to overcome your fear of public speaking
     • How to overcome clown fear
     • How to overcome the fear of needles
     • How to overcome the fear of strangers
     • How to overcome your fear of spiders
     • How to overcome your fear of flying

2. 

   
   
   List your fears. To fight your fear, you need to know what makes you afraid. Sit down and write down a list of the things you fear. What is that? Where do they come from? What are their origins? Did it happen suddenly? When don't they seem so scary? How do they make you feel? When you pull away from your fear and from yourself by looking at yourself on paper, you will be able to think more rationally and objectively about your fear.
   • You can pool similar fears, especially if you have many of the same fears.
   • Writing a "fear diary" is a good idea. Whenever you feel overcoming your fear, take out your journal and start writing it down. Not only is it a good relief through which you will gain confidence and realize that you eventually have the power to overpower the situation. It can also help you keep your distance from the things that scare you.

3. 

   
   
   Distinguish between rational fear and irrational fear. In some situations it is natural to feel some degree of fear. The natural fear response is an evolutionary advantage, which has allowed people to survive in a dangerous world for thousands of years. However, there are other more unreasonable fears and they are often the cause of difficulties and suffering.
   • For example, when you encounter a bear while on a picnic, feeling dread is a perfectly normal and healthy response, because you are in danger. However, if you refuse to fly for fear of an accident, this fear is very absurd. According to statistics, flying is much safer than driving yourself. Understanding what is logical and unreasonable fear can help you manage your responses.

4. 

   
   
   Draw "ladder of fear". Choose a fear you want to face and write it down on the top ladder, then break it down into steps. Starting on the last step, write down the least fearless action you can take to deal with it. For each successive ladder, choose an action that brings you closer to the top step, facing that fear head-on. Divide your ladder into as many steps as needed, and stand trying to leap past the stairs too quickly. Outline the various steps you can take.
   • Imagine you are afraid of flying, and even getting close to an airplane makes you nervous. On the last step, you record your first step as studying the mechanics behind flying. (no longer the thought of "wings can only be supported by miracles!"). The next step is to "go to the airport". This step is a bit higher, but not very scary: you just go to the airport, not really flying. You can then book tickets for a short 30-minute flight with a friend. On the top step, you will be flying a long, solo flight.
   • It is a good idea to start with a small one. Some people make the mistake of jumping into confrontation with the thing they fear the most, but exposure therapy works best when done gradually.
   • If you do not know what the "fear ladder" should look like, you can find this form on the Internet of Anxiety BC.

5. 

   Face your thoughts. When you have surrounded your mind with fear - you know where it comes from, and you have divided it into many small steps - now is the time for the mind, yes, to surround the mind. Remember that your fear is just one way of thinking you can control. Changing your “inner monologue,” or the way you think about situations, can turn your response to fear.
   • One way to do this is to convert the worst scenario thinking to the best scenario. For example, imagine that you really want to go scuba diving, but focus on the worst scenario: being eaten by a shark, the oxygen tube is broken, you drown. While those are also probabilities, they are very low: the risk of dying from a shark is 1 / 3,700,000. (For ease of comparison, the risk of getting hurt by room spray perfume is 1 / 2,600). On the contrary, the likelihood of you having a great experience doing things that you fear is very high. Why would you refuse to do something that could bring you so much joy and beauty?
   • Equipping yourself with stats is also a helpful way. Even though irrational fears, yes, are absurd, you can counteract the tendency to tragic - or think of a worst-case scenario - by learning about some of the facts about what you fear. . For example, if you know that out of 7,000,000 flights in North America between 1992 and 2001, there were only 30 crashes, your fear of flying is probably a little more difficult to justify.

6. 

   See a mental health professional. Some fears are not much of a nuisance in everyday life, especially when you can avoid the source of fear (such as staying away from snakes if you have snakes). others like social phobia can destroy you on a daily basis. If you constantly suffer from fear, or fear is making your life more troublesome, see a mental health professional. They can help you find the cause and help you take steps to conquer your fear.
   • A mental health professional can recommend a variety of treatment options. Prescription drugs such as beta blockers and antidepressants can help you manage anxiety and stress caused by fear, while cognitive behavioral therapy helps you to rearrange your thinking towards the end. With you, you can control your emotions. The multi-step exposure therapy mentioned in this article is also recognized to be effective in repelling typical fears, especially those related to a particular object or experience. Can (take the elevator, watch the shark, etc.)
   advertisement

Part 2 of 3: Entering the conquered zone

1. 

   Understand that fear comes from learning. Most of the fears are learned from us. When we were children, we were fearless. But as we get older, we learn that we should be afraid of certain things. We are afraid of talking to others. We are afraid to speak. We are afraid of riding a roller coaster. But there was a time when we were not afraid. The trick to overcoming fear is to remember that the fear we have learned - and that we may not be learning, either.
   • This is especially true of social phobia, which often stems from a fear of rejection and a lack of compassion for yourself. If you don't object to your loved one for their work, then probably most people will not object to you either. (And if they do, the problem is with them more than with you.)

2. 

   
   
   Visualization your success. Imagine that you are confident and have absolutely no fear. Confidence in itself is not a guarantee of success, but approaching a situation with confidence can help you try harder. So imagine yourself in that situation. Visualize your images, smells, feelings and senses. Control it now.
   • This takes practice. First, spend 5 minutes imagining. As you feel more familiar, you can increase it to 10 minutes. Gradually, you can spend as long as you want to enter the area.

3. 

   
   
   Stretch the body. Stretching and stretching exercises can help dispel your anxiety so that you will feel better in dealing with your fears.
   • Choose a quiet, comfortable place and lie down.
   • Focus on muscle tension in one muscle group, such as the hand or forehead. Maintain tension for 5 seconds.
   • Relax. Feel the relaxation spread throughout that muscle group.
   • Repeat with major muscle groups such as the face, hands, arms, back, abdomen, hips and buttocks, thighs, calves, and feet.

4. 

   
   
   Breath. The sympathetic nervous system is activated when you feel fear, and this triggers physical symptoms such as increased heart rate, rapid, and shallow breathing. Fight these symptoms by focusing on regular, deep breathing exercises and relaxation.
   • Lie on your back with your hands on your stomach. When inhaled through the nose, you should feel your abdomen rise. Then exhale through your mouth. Repeat this 10 times.

5. 

   Live in the present. Many fears stem from anxiety about an uncontrollable future. Winston Churchill once said, “When I look back on all those worries, I remember the story of a dying old man dying that he had many problems in his life that most never happened. " Practicing mindfulness meditation can help you live in the present moment and not obsess over the things that you have no control over.
   • Mindfulness meditation can also improve concentration and create a deeper sense of happiness and acceptance.

6. 

   Turn your fear into energy. The fear state can produce a lot of powerful energy through the action of the sympathetic nervous system (the system responsible for the "fight or flight" response). While you may never be completely relaxed and calm doing something you're afraid of, you can still change the way you think about that fear. Instead, imagine that the energy of fear is enthusiasm - your body is truly indistinguishable.
   • For example, if you are frightened of moving but want to visit a loved one who lives far away, try turning the energy of fear of flying a plane or a train into eagerness to accomplish your ultimate goal. You may be a bit uncomfortable for a moment, but you'll be happy that you didn't let fear stop your visit to your family.

7. 

   Think about your past accomplishments. Thinking about your successes will help you build your confidence, so you will feel strong to conquer your fear. What wonderful things have you done in the face of adversity? Have you ever done something that you weren't sure you could do? What did not knock you down but only made you stronger?
   • Don't underestimate your achievements. Perhaps you have been more successful than you think, even if it is not the great achievements of becoming US president. Did you graduate from high school? Tax return on time? Cook your own dinner? All of those things are success.

8. 

   Think about the next 20 seconds. Just the next 20 seconds. When you are about to face your fear, think only about the next 20 seconds. That's all. It doesn't put the rest of your life in jeopardy, even the late afternoon of the day won't be affected. The next 20 seconds is everything you need.
   • 20 seconds of daring puzzlement. 20 seconds of ultimate delight. 20 seconds of irresistible extraordinary. You can control it, can't you? Can you pretend for 1/3 minutes? Because after those first 20 seconds things go downhill.
   advertisement

Part 3 of 3: Attack of fear

1. 

   Expose yourself to your fear. Start at the bottom of the scale of fear. Do it over and over until you start to feel comfortable with it. For example, if you are afraid of speaking in public, you can start by simply saying "hello" to the cashier at the grocery store. Plan in advance your steps so that you feel in control of the situation.
   • If you are afraid of a stationary state such as altitude, try to stay exposed for as long as possible (eg looking over the railing from the second floor of the mall). If you are afraid of an action or thing, repeat it as many times as you can until there is less nervousness in doing so (say hello to everyone you meet at supermarket).
   • The longer you face the situation or thing that you fear, the more likely you are to break the cycle of fear. However, if you are unbearably afraid, don't be disappointed! You can take a break and try again another day.

2. 

   Practice the next step, then the next step. Don't push yourself, but push yourself. Once you feel you have mastered the first step on the fear scale, move on to the next step. Once you start to feel good in the face of your fears, don't stop! You do not want to lose the step you have made. Please continue to challenge yourself.

3. 

   Join a support network. Maybe there are other people in your area who have the same fears you do. Your chances of success will be higher with mutual support. There is nothing to be shy about calling for help. If you can't find a formal support group, you can share your fears with friends or family and ask them for help.
   • Talk to friends and family about your plan to deal with your fears and ask them to stay with you as you do it. Let them know how you can react and how you need their help. They will probably be happy to assist you.

4. 

   Talk about your fears. Telling others about your fears will help you realize that you are not alone, and can make your fears more manageable. Your friends may find solutions to help you get through the things that frighten you. You can even make fun of your fears, giving you more courage to deal with it.
   • For example, if you panic at a long presentation that needs to be delivered, tell a friend. You can even practice giving presentations in front of some close friends. Practicing over and over in front of people you feel comfortable with can give you the confidence you need to succeed when you make a real presentation.

5. 

   Make it look real. The advice "Pretend until you can do it" makes sense. Studies show that you can actually become more confident just by acting like that. If you're afraid of something like public speaking, you probably understand your flaws better than anyone else. Approach the situation with confidence, even if it is fake, and you will find that it is not as scary as it seems.
   • You might be surprised at how easy it is to deceive your brain. For example, did you know that smiling really makes you happier? It is also the principle of pretending to be confident even though inside you are genuinely afraid.

6. 

   Self-awarded. Every time you face a little fear and move up the next step, reward yourself.Rewarding yourself after facing a challenge is an example of "conditioning of the outcome", ie the sweet reward given as a result of the action, and it is very effective. in behavior change.
   • When you have reached your greatest fear, give yourself the greatest reward. The bigger the fear, the bigger the reward. Please set the reward first to look forward! Everyone needs motivation. When you receive a reward, the more people know about your progress, the more pressure you have to succeed. If you have a positive mindset, you can do it.
   advertisement

Advice

• Don't shirk your fears simply through other activities like shopping or drinking. It is important for you to acknowledge your fear and make an effort to change your way of thinking.
• You will not be able to overcome your fear immediately, and you may never be completely comfortable with what you are afraid of. It also doesn't mean you fail. Please continue to make efforts.
• The more you think about coping with your fear, the more subconsciously determined you will be to dispel your fears.

Warning

• Think rationally and cautiously when facing your fear. If you are afraid of sharks, do not rush into shark-filled waters and try to swim.
• Don't immediately jump in to confront the scariest thing you can think of. This will ultimately injure you more.
• Some fear-related disorders such as panic disorder, social phobia and anxiety disorder are very serious conditions that require medical treatment for mental health. Don't be afraid to get help! See an expert.