How to stay calm when angry

Author: Louise Ward
Date Of Creation: 5 February 2021
Update Date: 1 July 2024
Anonim
How to Control Anger - Sadhguru
Video: How to Control Anger - Sadhguru

Content

How often do you get angry? Have you ever shouted, kicked baskets and scolded when feeling helpless to those around you? Have you ever suddenly felt blood boiling in a traffic jam, when you received a bad news that doesn't matter, or simply when you hear something you don't want to hear? If so, then you need to learn to manage it before the anger takes over your life. It's not easy to master the deep-rooted temperament of each person, so it takes a way to control yourself at that time as well as in the future.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Stay Calm When Something Happens

  1. Go for a walk. Try to get out of a situation that is causing you to be angry. This will help you calm down and think clearly. If it's a fine day, go outside and enjoy the beautiful natural scenery .. Or just stand up and walk around a little to burn the negative energy and get rid of the problem that is bothering you. If you are in a heated debate, it should not be a problem to say, "I'm going out for a bit."
    • Remember that in most cases, you don't need to respond right away. So you can leave the room or building and give yourself time to calm down before answering someone.

  2. Control your initial "hot flash". If you get angry easily, your first action will usually be negative. You may want to kick your car, punch a wall, or yell at someone. Instead of this initial impulsive act, ask yourself what you need to do to get good results. Take a minute to think about how you should react and consider what will usually calm you down.
    • Your first reaction is often violent, destructive, and completely unreasonable. Don't let these negative emotions take over and overpower you, leaving you in a worse situation.

  3. Dance to a tune. You may think this is the last thing you want to do when you are angry, but this is also exactly why you should. If you're feeling overwhelmed by anger, turn on your favorite music, dance and sing along. This will make you forget your anger and feel better.
    • If this method really works for you then you can even take your favorite music with you to play it on every time you feel really angry.

  4. Practice deep breathing. Sit upright in a chair. Breathe in deeply through your nose, count to 6. Then slowly exhale, counting to 8 or 9. Pause and repeat 10 times.
    • Try to focus only on your breathing, erasing from your head whatever disturbs your mind.
  5. Countdown from fifty. By counting silently or counting out loud, you can calm down in less than a minute. While counting, try to focus only on the numbers and stay calm. Focusing on counting will keep you from being overwhelmed by anger and make you deal with the problem with a "cold" head.
    • If you're still angry, repeat the exercise, or you can count down from 100.
  6. Meditate. Meditation can help you regulate your emotions. So if you are feeling about to lose control, let your mind relax by meditating. Get out of the situation that makes you angry before you start meditating. For example, you can go outside, out the stairs, or even go to the toilet to get out of the scene that makes you angry.
    • Breathe slowly and deeply. Maintaining this breath will lower your fast beating heart rate. The breath should be deep until you feel your stomach fill the "inside" breath.
    • Imagine a yellow-white light filling your body as you inhale, relaxing your mind. As you exhale, imagine the breath taking away the dark colors in your body.
    • Make a habit of meditating each morning, even when you are not angry. Practicing meditation every day will help you become calmer.
  7. Imagine a peaceful scene. Close your eyes and imagine your favorite place, like the beach where you used to go on vacation as a kid or the beautiful lake you remember from your teenage days. It could also be a place you've never been to, a field of flowers, or a beautiful sight. Pick a place where you immediately feel calm and at peace, and you will find your breathing return to normal.
    • Focus on the smallest detail. The more detail you see, the more you can make your anger go away.
  8. Listening to music. Listening to the music of your favorite artist will bring you back to normal. Listening to music has been shown to help you relive beautiful memories and help stabilize your mood. Listening to music also calms the angry or agitated person, even when they are not aware of the source of the excitement.
    • Classical and jazz are often particularly helpful in quenching people's anger, but you can also find music that is right for you.
  9. Think in a positive way. You can calm your anger by trying to focus on positive thoughts. Close your eyes, let the negative thoughts come to you and think about at least 3 positive thoughts. These positive thoughts could be about the positive aspects of the situation you're worried about, about one thing. something else you are working towards or what makes you happy. Some examples of positive thoughts include:
    • This will pass.
    • I'm strong enough to handle this.
    • Tough situations are also an opportunity to grow up.
    • I won't feel angry for long; This is just a temporary feeling.
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Part 2 of 3: Changing Your View

  1. Change how you view things. Change your perception, this will help you see things in a positive way, helping you to be calm. If you pay close attention to the things that make you angry, you will begin to believe the negative things, as if everything in your life is bad.Cognitive change encourages you to use rational thoughts. and being positive to have a more positive outlook on what's going on in life.
    • For example, you might think "everything that happened to me was terrible". However, if you think rationally about what's happening, you can realize that it's a combination of good and bad: in a day you can crash a car, pick up 100,000. , get into trouble at work, and receive an unexpected gift from a friend.This is a combination of good and bad, and if you spend more time focusing on the good things, you will feel better in your life.
    • Another example, instead of thinking negatively like: "This always happens, I can't take it anymore!" Think positively: "It happened so many times, and I've handled it successfully; I'll get through it again".
  2. Keep a diary of your anger. Write down details about your angry feelings. If something happens that leaves you out of control of your emotions, write it down in your journal. You need to write down exactly how you feel, what makes you angry, where you are, with whom, how you react and how you feel afterward.
    • Once you have been using this diary for a while, you need to start learning similarities from the people, places, and things that make you angry.
  3. Find out what makes you angry. In addition to learning how to calm down when you get angry, try to understand the source of your anger by identifying the factors involved and trying to reduce your anger responses. You may find that by identifying the sources of your anger, you control your emotional responses.
  4. Communicate actively. You can make yourself even more angry if you speak without thinking it through - it also makes the other person angry and aggravates the nature of the problem. When something makes you angry, take a minute to think about its cause and then say what you are really feeling.
    • One of the forms of positive communication is "assertive when angry", rather than expressing yourself passively (angry without saying anything) or overbearing (outrageous compared to with stressors), try to communicate actively. To do this, mention the nature of the event (not exaggerated by emotions) to respectfully convey the request (not the need) of others. For example, you could say, "You are very angry because I never told you I will be late."
  5. Know when to ask for help. Many people can deal with anger problems themselves at home. However, you may need professional help dealing with your anger, if you experience the following:
    • Small things make you angry as well.
    • When you are angry, you display aggressive behaviors, including screaming, screaming or smashing.
    • When anger occurs over and over again, you may have "chronic anger".
  6. Participate in an anger management program. Anger management programs have proven to be very successful. It is effective at helping you understand the source of anger, developing short-term strategies for handling anger, and building your emotional control skills. There are many suitable programs for you to choose from ..
    • Individual programs where you live are specific to each age group, occupation, or situation.
    • To find an anger management program that's right for you, try searching online for "anger management classes" plus (+) with the name of the city or region you live in. You can also search for terms like "for teenagers" or "for PTSD" (post-traumatic) to find a group that fits your particular situation.
    • You can also search for suitable programs by consulting with your doctor or therapist, or by consulting self-improvement courses at community centers.
  7. Find a suitable therapist. The best way to learn to stay calm is to identify and root your anger problems. A therapist can teach you relaxation techniques to use in situations that make you angry. They can help you develop emotional control and communication skills.
    • In addition, a therapist will also help deal with problems from your past (eg childhood neglect or abuse), which are also one of the triggers of anger.
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Part 3 of 3: Living a Slower

  1. Create a positive living environment for yourself. Collect happy things for your life. Scented candles, potted plants, or pictures of friends and family, things that make you happy will also help you calm down. Keeping your workspace or home tidy and comfortable, and sunlight can make you feel more positive and less stressful in everyday life.
    • Try to be tidy as much as possible. You will be less angry if you can easily find everything you need.
  2. Make time for things you love. Part of the reason you feel angry may be that you feel like you almost never have time for yourself and are always stuck in a mess of things you don't want to do. So if you like to draw, read, or run, set aside time in your daily or weekly schedule to do it. You will be less angry because you spend more time doing the things you want to do.
    • If you are truly not passionate or inspired by anything, find whatever makes you feel at peace.
  3. Remember to eat a balanced diet. Many people are familiar with the feeling of "hangry" (a combination of hunger and anger). Avoid this feeling by eating healthy: eat foods high in protein, fruits and vegetables. This will help you alleviate hunger and keep your blood sugar low. Make sure you start your day with a healthy breakfast that keeps you energizing all day.
  4. Get 7-8 hours of sleep each night. Getting enough sleep every night will help you develop a healthy body and mind. Lack of sleep causes a host of health problems, including loss of control over your emotions. Getting enough sleep can help you stay calm in stressful situations.
    • If you have trouble sleeping, talk to your doctor about changes in diet or lifestyle to improve sleep. You can also try sleeping pills.
  5. Try to laugh as much as you can. While you're really upset, smiling can be difficult. But smiling and laughing has been shown to make you more balanced, even when you're feeling angry, and laughing can convert hormones that make you feel angry. Spending more time laughing every day can make you less serious and will make it easier for you to be funny even when bad situations happen.
    • Read a joke or find a few friends to make you happier once your mood has settled. You can also try watching a comedy.
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Advice

  • Reading books. Reading can help you calm down quickly, especially when you focus on understanding what you're reading.
  • Try taking a nap. Napping can help dispel your anger quickly.

Warning

  • If you feel like you cannot control your anger, or if you have a tendency to think or act violently, seek advice immediately.