Content

• Steps
• Advice

Marriage is the supreme bond between two individuals. Both men vowed to love each other no matter what the consequences would be, but sometimes things can get quite stressful. Maybe it's because you just went through a bad argument, you feel that you are getting separated, or maybe you just reached a point where you need to improve your relationship.A relationship requires effort and commitment to maintain strong love, and marriage is no exception. With a little effort, a little understanding, and a little patience, you and your spouse can improve your marriage, and don't forget the reasons why you've sworn to love each other all the time. life.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Improving Communication

1. 

   
   
   Listen to your spouse. Usually, couples who have been together for quite a long time will not think seriously about what the other is saying. For example, your spouse might talk about something you are doing that makes him / her uncomfortable, but you might think this is no big deal because you are both together. live together for a long time. However, the little things come together, and when your partner feels that they are worthless or not being heard, you will have the bigger problem with trust and trust. close in the future.
   • If your partner says he or she is upset with something, take this statement seriously. Find ways to solve the problem, whether alone or together, but make sure you take your spouse's concerns seriously.
   • Address the other's needs. If your spouse tells you about what he or she wants in a relationship, you may need to work hard to do it or work together to find a way to compromise.

2. 

   
   
   Spend quality time with your spouse. Quality time is a time when you focus absolutely and unconditionally on your partner. No matter what happens, set aside this time for your ex. The phone rang? Cut off the call or turn off the phone in front of your spouse. Do this as if you really meant it. And then… listen. Sit together, look at each other, enjoy each other's presence and enjoy the moment of being together. Do this at least once a week for 30-60 minutes.

3. 

   
   
   Be open and honest with each other. Honesty is a very important factor in a relationship, especially if you are married. You will want to feel that you can trust your spouse, and you want him to feel the same way. However, honesty and openness are not just limited to telling the truth; It also means not to hide information, and not to conceal it every time you want to address a problem.
   • Never lie to your spouse. Even if it's just a trivial lie, such as saying something doesn't bother you and the truth isn't, over time, this action can lead to resentment or controversy. argue.
   • Open up and allow yourself to be soft in front of the person. Tell your spouse about your secret hopes and dreams, about your deep inner fears, and about the other things you hide.
   • Allow the person to open up and become vulnerable to you. This can help build trust and cultivate a stronger feeling of intimacy and affection.

4. 

   
   
   Find a way to compromise. Compromising can be tough, especially when your emotions are heightened after an argument. However, it's not worth trying to get the right part of yourself for 30 seconds when the tension this action brings on the argument can make your relationship slip. It is okay to disagree or even fight, but you need to be open and humble so you can compromise and cooperate.
   • Don't think of the argument as something that you should "win" over. This is a dangerous thought because it could turn you and your partner against each other.
   • Get rid of issues that are not worth fighting. Even if you are not the wrong person, it is not worth getting into intense and unpleasant arguments.
   • Willing to give way. Just because you think you're right doesn't mean further arguing about your point of view will help you, so try to stop before things "escalate".
   • Compromise makes your relationship stronger. When you are both ignoring your needs, including the need to be the right person, you can work together to make the two of you better.

5. 

   
   
   Use "I" statements. When you and your spouse have a disagreement, it is important that you avoid accusing or insulting each other. One way that many couples often unintentionally hurt each other is by using statements starting with "he / she" instead of "I". Saying "I" can help you convey your feelings and drive a conversation to be more productive and positive, rather than hurting the other person's feelings.
   • Statement to the subject "he / she" conveys blame on the other party. For example "You are always late, and make me look like an idiot!".
   • The statement to the subject "I" reconstructs the conversation in a way that focuses on the other's emotions, not the other's blaming or guilt. For example, "When he / she doesn't arrive on time and we need to go somewhere, I feel like he / she isn't thinking about my feelings".
   • The word "I" has three components: a concise and non-accusatory description of the behavior that upsets you, how you feel about the behavior, and the visible, tangible effect of the particular behavior. your spouse's body to you.
   • The behavioral component needs to relate to the actual situation, your feelings need to be directly related to the behavior, and its effects can help you identify consequences or support feelings. contact about the problem.
   • The goal here is to be as specific as possible and keep track of the problem at hand. Don't talk about irrelevant issues or emotions, but rather focus on its apparent influence in the present situation.

6. 

   
   
   Never shout at that person. Many people started screaming without even realizing their actions. When arguing, your emotions may intensify, and you will want to talk more actively. However, yelling at your spouse will only bring about one of two things: either the ex will yell at you again, or both will yell at each other. Either way, it makes the situation more likely to hurt you both and make your relationship more strained.
   • Screaming and letting out any frustration can give you a sense of relief in the present moment, but your emotions will only intensify.
   • When you scold others, you will often say things you shouldn't have, and you will never be able to take that painful word back when you calm down.
   • Avoid talking about important things when you (and / or your partner) are feeling unhappy. Go for a walk, or simply stay away for 5 or 10 minutes, then re-start the conversation when you're both calmer.
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Part 2 of 3: “Warming up” Romance

1. 

   Change the habit. Whether you have been married for 2 years or 20 years, it will easily feel as if you and your partner are trapped in a boring lifestyle. Habits are formed because they are convenient and they make it easier for you to control your everyday life, but boredom and relationship habits can gradually ruin your feelings that you even lice never realized.
   • If you often eat at home every night, date your crush. If you usually eat separately, you can cook a meal for your ex and share a meal together.
   • Do something interesting that you and your spouse don't usually do. It doesn't have to be crazy, but it does need to motivate you to enjoy a good time and get excited.
   • Go on a romantic getaway together, or just simply plan a fun and enjoyable day - even if this simply means going to a fair or amusement park together.

2. 

   Flirt with each other. When you and your spouse are dating, make sure you flirt often. Then why are you stopping? Almost every couple feels quite comfortable with each other, and this is a good thing. But the downside is that you forget how to show your charm, usually because you haven't acted like that for months (or even years).
   • Make eye contact.
   • Smile at the person and giggle.
   • Use romantic body language, and imitate your partner's body language.
   • Stand facing each other, avoid crossing your arms, and lean toward the other person while chatting.

3. 

   Increase physical exposure. Physical contact is a very important element of the intimacy process. Physical contact makes you feel desired, and can make you feel more comfortable and closer to your partner. If the two of you have gotten too intimate and done a lot of physical contact, move on. If you lose this part of your relationship, you should make an effort to bring it back into your life.
   • Physical exposure doesn't just mean it sexually (though many see sex as a healthy part of marriage). It could mean holding hands, snuggling together, feeling weak, kissing, or any other act of affection.
   • Your spouse will probably want to get as many of the same physical interactions as you do, but he may be too shy or worried that you don't want to.
   • Don't get too stressed on this, just provoke it. Your spouse will appreciate this, and it will help you both feel closer.
   • Remember that emotions often accompany action. If you do your best and try to create a romantic evening for your partner, a romantic feeling will develop.

4. 

   Make time for intimacy. If you have been married for a few years, you will both often find yourself confused trying to balance work and home. This problem will be even more difficult if you have children. But spending time on intimacy without distractions (kids, business phone / email, etc.) can be of great help in setting the fire to your relationship. , especially if you do it week after week.
   • Spending time together, especially for physical contact, will often lead to sex and will make you both closer.
   • If necessary, you can schedule intimacy and / or sex. Many experts recommend that even setting aside 30 minutes for intimacy can do wonders for your relationship.
   • Send your kids to the babysitter, or if they're old enough to be alone, give them money to go to the movies or go shopping. This will help you to have some private time with your spouse.
   • Turn off the phone at first when the two are together. Nothing is more moodbreaking than when your partner is dragged into a work-related phone call for hours.
   • Being intimate is not just something you do just once. Do your best to take the time to do this once a week, or several times a week, or whenever you and your spouse need it.

5. 

   Communicate interests in the story of "pillow covers". This involves being honest and open with each other. Some people feel scared when they have to express their desires to someone else, even if they are their spouse. However, you don't have to be ashamed of your interests. You can talk to your partner about your interests or delusions about sex, and ask about his interests. And no matter what you or your spouse desires, be sure to respect each other's needs.
   • Feeling as though your partner is unable to fulfill your needs can cause you to become sexually unsatisfied, and will eventually make the process a daily routine.
   • The best way for you both to enjoy sex is to talk to each other about what you both like or dislike.
   • Get ready to explore new activities together in the bedroom so you can both meet each other's needs. Also, in general, trying something new can give you a spark in your relationship, and you'll find that you both can enjoy new habits.
   • Respecting your ex's needs doesn't mean you have to put yourself in uncomfortable situations. It's okay to set boundaries for yourself and ask your spouse to respect them.

6. 

   Consider finding a therapist for the couple. Many people think that couple therapy is only for those who are on the brink of a divorce. However, this is not true. This therapy can help you and your spouse improve communication skills, and find ways to feel closer, and solve any problems that arise in your marriage. .
   • Seeing a therapist is not an embarrassment or an insult. Couple therapy can help you and your partner at any stage of the relationship.
   • If you or your partner experience a decrease in desire or lack of desire in the bedroom, the therapist may advise you to see your doctor to see if you are having any problems. medical condition or not.
   • Sometimes, certain medications can reduce libido or the ability to perform sexual acts. In other cases, the decrease in libido may be caused by an emotional cause.
   • Be open and honest with your therapist and with your doctor to address any issues that arise during intimacy you are experiencing.
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Part 3 of 3: Strengthening Marriage in Cohesion

1. 

   Express gratitude for the little things. The greatest danger of a long-term relationship is not appreciating each other. No matter how much you love and respect your spouse, you may become so familiar with each other that you forget that you need to appreciate what your spouse has done for you. If you try to express your gratitude, your ex will certainly do the same.
   • Say thank you when your spouse does something for you, whether it's cooking, fixing a broken closet, or simply picking you up at the supermarket.
   • Let your spouse know that you appreciate the little things he or she does that will make him or her feel appreciated, and your spouse will want to continue doing the best for you (and vice versa). Future.

2. 

   Take time to pay attention to the person. Another aspect of the problem of ignorance is forgetting to give each other praise. You may think that your partner knows your love for them, and that may be true. But nothing can bring a smile to your lips like hearing that someone feels you are so attractive and desirable, so try to make the other person feel special as often as possible. the better.
   • You don't have to work too hard to pay attention to your partner. You can compliment the attractive outfit your spouse is wearing, or his new hairstyle, any improvements he has made following a new exercise routine, etc.
   • Try to praise the person's efforts in front of the other person. Showing off your spouse's accomplishments when they're too shy to do this can make them feel loved.

3. 

   Date your spouse. As the relationship develops, it can be difficult to make time for a date, or to go out and have a romantic evening together. This can be especially difficult if you have children.But spending time with each other gives you the excitement and passion that you once felt when you were both in the dating phase, and that desire is so important in maintaining a relationship. kiss for a long time.
   • Commit to spending time alone together. Hire a babysitter for your kids, or you can send them to sleep at a friend's house.
   • Choose a romantic restaurant. If you already have a favorite place or if you can reinvent your first date, even better.
   • "Dressed" with nice clothes. Try to make an impression on your spouse as though you are both still dating and unmarried.
   • After dinner, take a walk together or go to the movies. Focus on creating an intimate evening together.

4. 

   Make sure you are truly satisfied. In addition to being sexually satisfied, you need to feel as though your life has meaning and that you have achieved something. As surprising as it may seem, experts agree that having your own personal goals and achievements can strengthen your marriage.
   • When you feel as if your personal goals are accomplished, it will be easier to devote yourself to your spouse.
   • If you are very career focused, make time for your career. If you are an artist, you can pursue painting. If you're an athlete, you can train yourself to get ready for a marathon.
   • Whatever your partner's goals and achievements, it's important to have your own goals in mind. You and your spouse can support each other, and remember to celebrate each other's work.
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Advice

• Always remember to express your feelings. Kiss or hug your spouse and tell him or her that you love him very much.
• Respect your spouse. Never do something that could betray the other person's trust, such as lying or lying.
• Be kind to your spouse's friends, and make an effort to be social with them. Every time you meet them, you can say hello and have a little chat. Friendship can be quite important for your spouse, so meeting your spouse's friends can help you a lot in strengthening your relationship.
• If you feel jealous, don't go overboard. You should talk to your partner privately, and remember to say something like: "Bro, I know you love me and trust you, but I can't stop myself from feeling jealous. with you and that girl. I'm sorry ". Your spouse will understand you and explain the situation well to you so that you won't feel jealous.
• Go out together. Go on a date, whether at a luxury restaurant or at a hot dog truck. It's important to spend time hanging out and talking.