Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 4: Reduce the teasing
• Method 2 of 4: Tease back
• Method 3 of 4: Improve your friendships
• Method 4 of 4: Dealing with bullies

If your friends seem to be teasing you all the time, you might want to think twice about whether they are really your friends. It's different when they are bullies who like to hit you on a sensitive point. A true friend would never do anything to upset you. A little teasing among friends is normal, but if it always comes from one side, or if it happens all the time, don't put up with it. If you learn how to stop teasing, it won't bother you anymore.

To step

Method 1 of 4: Reduce the teasing

1. Learn how to laugh at yourself. This can be very difficult if you feel embarrassed and self-aware, but it is a very important step. Children can be tough and tend to think less about what they do to others than adults. If you show that you're upset, it brings out the worst in some people - and makes them bully you worse.
   • It's especially important to laugh at yourself when you make an obvious mistake in public, such as knocking over a drink, knocking over something, or dropping something you were holding onto.
   • Consider how other children handle such a situation. They often make a joke of it right away ("What do I have today? I'm tripping over everything!"). They will probably be teased by their friends for being clumsy anyway - even with the "cool" groups of kids. But after a minute, he / she will roll their eyes up and tell the friends to cut down… and then they'll just talk about something else.
   • Don't be too hard on yourself. Everyone does something shameful from time to time. Try to put it out of your mind and just move on - this is how you show others that nothing is wrong.
   • This may feel a little unnatural at first, so you have to force yourself to do it. But practice makes perfect!
2. Act confidently. You don't have to feel confident all the time, but at least do your best to look like that; if you look confident, people are less likely to tease you. People find others with self-confidence intimidating. If they don't know what you're going to say, they won't risk teasing you - they know they'll make a fool of themselves if you make a witty comment back.
   • Talk calmly. When you are nervous, you often speak faster… take it easy and you seem more confident.
   • Watch your body language. It sounds like a cliché, but try to keep your shoulders straight and your chin up. Then you not only look confident, but you also feel that way.
   • Have a chat with your older boy next door, with a friend of your mother's, or with your friend's little brother. If your friends aren't going to be there to make you nervous, talk to people you know won't bully you. The more you practice, the easier it is to talk to people in exciting situations.
   • Remember, people really don't pay attention to you as much as you might think. All the children around you - including the most popular - are only concerned with themselves. They're so scared that they'll say something stupid to someone they like, or that their friends will see that their hair isn't right today, that they won't have time to pay attention to you. So don't think everyone is looking at you when you enter the room. Usually this is not the case.
3. Try to claim it. Sometimes you can use teasing to your advantage, when it comes to something you don't mind, or when you think someone is teasing you because they are actually jealous of you. A good example of this is when a guy teases his friend for dressing up, especially if he thinks it's to impress a girl. Instead of getting upset, the other person can simply claim it by saying "Yes, I do have a new hat… and it looks great on me too!"
4. Let it slide away from you. This approach requires a trick, but if you can master it, it can be very effective in a variety of awkward situations. When you're bullied, pretend it doesn't hurt you, and look a little annoyed, but not angry. In the meantime, think something like "Okay kids, laugh enough, now grow up".
   • Don't ignore the teasing altogether, or it will seem like you're upset and taking it too seriously.
   • Don't agree with them or belittle yourself, or you'll encourage them to be even nastier.

Method 2 of 4: Tease back

1. Learn to tease back. An important life skill is the ability to tease people back without getting mean. A little teasing is part of life. If you can make jokes, others are not likely to choose you as a piss.
   • Some people tease their friends or loved ones for loving them - they really think they are funny. They'll appreciate it if you tease them back without getting upset.
2. Reflect it lightly. For example, if a friend teases you about a boy, you could say, "Why are you so interested in my love life anyway?" Or if someone is joking about your new haircut, you can say, "Since when has my haircut been the main topic of conversation for this group of friends?"
3. Pay attention. Pay attention if you are around someone who is good at deflecting criticism, and can return witty comments when they are being teased. Find out how he / she deals with this, what is said, and what response he / she gets. If you are being teased, you may think, "What would the other person have said in this situation?"
4. Use the "Yes, and…."-method. Your friends may be teasing you because they think you are changing and because they fear that you two will grow apart. They bully you because it is easier than it is to develop like you - change can be scary. If you pick up their joke and take it a step further, it shows that inside you are still the same person, and they don't need to feel threatened.
   • If your friend teases you for having a new leather jacket, and he / she says, "So, how are you, motorcycle mouse?", You can say, "Yes, and ... that's not all. Tomorrow I'll go trying to jump over a pool full of sharks with my motorbike ".
   • You are wearing a new scarf. Your boyfriend says, "Dude, is that your girlfriend's scarf?" Then say, "Yes of course! and … I have her underwear on too ”.

Method 3 of 4: Improve your friendships

1. Tell them it bothers you. A little teasing among friends is normal, but if it happens so often that you don't like it anymore, it's probably gotten out of hand. Your friends may not even know it is bothering you. Make sure you confront each friend separately, not in the group. Speaking about it while it is happening may only make the teasing worse.
   • Be clear about your expectations. Was it a specific incident? What should he / she have done differently so that it would have been good for you?
   • Know that teasing is part of some people's character - your friend may not be able to stop him / her from teasing you again. Do not force him / her to make a promise that he / she cannot keep. Then you just hate each other.
   • Try to be specific. If there is a particular topic that you feel is off limits, ask him / her to stop teasing you about it. Or if there is a particular friend who often incites your other friends, ask if he / she is aware of it and ask him / her to stop.
   • Don't blame your friend as it will only make them defensive. Don't say things like, "Why are you always so mean to me?" Rather say something like, "I really don't like it when people bully me about my weight - will you please support me when others do?"
   • Let them know it's okay with you, as long as they do their best to work on changing their behavior. Say something like, "We've been friends for ages, right? This is the only thing that's bothering me ... if you want to pay attention to that from now on, everything is fine."
   • If you know that you sometimes overreact to bullying or find it hard to laugh about it, tell your friends you're working on it. Say, "I know I can be very sensitive, and I'm trying to work on it. Maybe you guys can consider me a little bit until I can handle it better?"
   • However, don't let them go free if they continue to be annoying. Sometimes people justify their bullies by saying to the victim, "Hey, cheer up!" or "Don't you have a sense of humor?" Don't blame yourself if this is the case.
2. Ask them if anything is bothering you. Some people bully because they have a problem with you, which they are afraid to tell you. They then try to incorporate it into a conversation as a joke. If you suspect this is the case, take your friend aside and ask if there is anything he / she wants to say to you. Say that bullying has come across as really mean lately, and you want to know why.
   • Use this approach with friends who have suddenly started teasing, or if their normal funny teases suddenly become mean.
   • There may be a misunderstanding between the two of you, and once that is out of the blue, the teasing will stop right away.
3. Find out why they do it. Sometimes friends tease you for feeling threatened by you, if they think you are becoming more popular than them. They just want the attention of the group, even if it is negative attention. They think they come out better if they put you down.
   • If you're suddenly more teased than usual, and you don't find out why, others may start to see you as more attractive or confident than before - in that case, cheer up, that might be a good thing!
   • Consider if anything has happened in your friend's life that makes him / her feel insecure. Maybe he / she is trying to divert attention away from himself / herself. It may not be about you at all.
4. Be willing to let it go. Don't make it bigger than it is, and don't demand an apology. A good friend will say sorry without being asked if he / she realizes that it is really making you sad. But if you force him / her to feel bad when he / she thinks nothing is wrong, he / she may hate you. If you still want to stay friends, tell them that if he / she teases you a little less, then you're okay.
   • If he / she continues to tease you after you agree that things would change, you may need to think about ending the friendship. Mean people in your life give you a lot of unnecessary stress.

Method 4 of 4: Dealing with bullies

1. Go on the attack. There is a saying that goes, "The offense is the best defense". If you think you can do it, you can stop the bullying by nipping it in the bud. If you are always being bullied by someone in a particular class, you may be able to speak to them immediately when you sit down. Say in a funny way, "Oh yes - it's 2pm. Of course it's time to talk about my hair again". The trick is to make your bully feel boring and predictable.
   • If you can make the bully's friends laugh at your joke, you can turn their teasing on the bully. People who like to bully others often find themselves in groups of friends who also like to tease each other.
   • The last thing the bully wants is to be made fun of in front of his friends.
2. Control the situation. If you're confident enough for a more aggressive technique, you can also take charge of the conversation. You may be able to silence them if you know the underlying motive for why they need you. If you can find out why they are bullying you, you may also be able to find other ways to resolve the situation without getting into an argument.
   • Every time, ask the person who is bullying you if he / she wants to clarify themselves. ("Why do you think that?" Or "Why do you think I did that?")
   • Make sure you don't get angry or appear sarcastic, as this will only make him / her more angry.
3. Never tease anyone else. You immediately lose your moral credibility if you tease others, even if you tease the friends who teased you the most. If you start bullying them, they just think you want to play a game with them. Some kids really like bullying, and they don't care if they are being teased themselves - they are often really tough girls with four big brothers. The moment you start teasing others, you are also a target. Defend yourself, but don't get mean.
4. Tell someone. If the situation really gets out of hand and you can't get it under control, talk to a teacher or your parents. They may be able to find a way to deal with the situation without anyone knowing you told them.
   • Be careful with this approach, because if the bully finds out that you have told it, he / she may be treating you even worse.
   • Your safety and mental well-being are more important than your reputation. If you think a bully is going to be violent, you owe it to yourself and other kids who are being bullied to speak up.