Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 3: Accept and understand the problem
• Part 2 of 3: Indicate that you have a problem
• Part 3 of 3: Finding solutions

Problems in your life can feel overwhelming at times and it may be the last thing you want to be confronted with. Fortunately, problem management and coping is a well-studied area, and there are many cognitive, emotional, and behavioral steps that can be taken to effectively cope with your problems.

To step

Part 1 of 3: Accept and understand the problem

1. Acknowledge the problem. It may be tempting to avoid the point that is causing you problems. However, avoiding the problem does not help solve it. Rather accept that the problem exists and even ask yourself some questions about it. What are the consequences of this problem? Who are involved?
   • If you don't feel like you have a problem, but everyone tells you there is a problem, try to see if there is any truth to it.
   • If you have a hard time admitting that you have a problem, you may be in denial. For example, if you don't want to acknowledge that someone in your family is dealing with drugs, you may come up with an apology for her behavior.
   • While denial can sometimes be helpful because it protects your mental health, in other cases it can keep you from addressing the problem directly.
   • In fact, avoidance will often make the problem worse and not provide any real relief. Avoiding your problem will perpetuate a downward spiral of stress because you always carry it with you in the back of your mind.
   • That said, sometimes a little escapism can be very healthy. If you notice that it is all getting too much for you and you get overworked, take a break! Watch a TV show or read a book, or indulge in some hobby that you enjoy. You can even stare in front of you and let your thoughts run wild!
2. Avoid doomsday thinking. Doom thinking involves having irrational thoughts, such as exaggerating your problems by blowing them up massively. For example, you might think that just because you failed a class, you think you will never get a good job again. Doom thinking can also involve turning to all-or-nothing thinking (eg, I'm going to solve this problem, otherwise everything will have become meaningless).
   • You can avoid doom thinking by being aware of it when you do. This requires you to be able to monitor your own thoughts and check them for accuracy.
   • Can you monitor your thoughts by remembering to think about them and by asking yourself if, if someone else had that thought, you would think they are accurate?
3. Think about the source of the problem. When did you first notice the problem? Sometimes you may not notice something until it is a fact for a long time. This may be especially true if your problem is related to other people (e.g., your sister has had a drug problem for a long time before you noticed it).
   • If you feel like you know when the problem started, think about events that happened at the same time. The root of the problem may be related to it. For example, if your grades in school keep dropping after your father leaves your mother, you may find it difficult to adjust to the new situation.
4. Put things in perspective. Probably your problem isn't the end of the world: you can still get on with your life despite the problem. Every problem has either a solution or can be viewed in a different way, showing that it is ultimately not that big of a problem.
   • For example, your problem may be that you can't get to school on time. By making a few changes in your habits or seeking alternative transportation, this can be changed.
   • Some things cannot be changed, such as a permanent disability or the death of a loved one, but you can learn to live with it and then grow as a person. Also keep in mind that people often think that negative events will make them feel more awful for much longer than they actually do.
   • Telling yourself that this isn't the end of the world doesn't mean your problem isn't really a problem, or unimportant. It just helps you realize that your problem is not insurmountable.
5. Embrace the challenge. You can think of your problem as something negative or as something that gives you the opportunity to show that you can handle it. For example, if you failed a particular class, you could consider it a major problem and it could make you depressed. But you can also embrace the challenges it presents. Your failure suggests that you will have to work harder, or that you will have to learn new study and organizational skills in order to succeed. You can use this problem as an opportunity to learn new skills.
   • Dealing with your problems and solving them can make you feel more competent and also make you more empathetic towards others who have their own problems.

Part 2 of 3: Indicate that you have a problem

1. Write down your problem. Put your problem on paper. This will help make the problem more tangible and will make it more likely that you will try to solve it by envisioning it.
   • For example, if your problem is that you don't have enough money, you can write it down. You can also write down the consequences of that problem to make the point clear and motivate you to solve it. An implication of not having enough money could be that you are stressed and that you cannot have the things you would like to have.
   • If the problem isn't something personal, post the list somewhere you can see it so you don't forget to act on it. For example, hang it on the door of the refrigerator.
2. Talk about the problem. Share any pertinent details of your problem with someone who can trust you with the information, such as a friend, relative, teacher, or parent. In any case, it can help reduce your stress. . In addition, he or she can help you with advice that you had not thought of before.
   • If you are going to talk to someone who has the same problem, you will need to be tactful. Let the other person know that you would like to learn something so that you can solve it.
3. Embrace your feelings. Your feelings can serve as a guide to let you know how things are going in solving your problems. Feelings are important, even the negative ones. If you feel frustrated or angry, for example, acknowledge those feelings and see what caused them, instead of brushing it under the rug. By identifying the cause, you may also be able to find a solution to your problem.
   • It's okay to feel upset, angry, or worried, as long as you realize that these feelings aren't going to help you solve your problem. You will have to take action to resolve the problem. Still, these emotions can tell you that you have a problem, as well as hint at what's causing it.
   • Some ways to calm down when you're upset include focusing on your breath, counting to 10 (or higher if you need to), talking nice to yourself (telling yourself that "it's all going to be okay," or something like , "take it easy."). Go for a walk or listen to soothing music.
4. Consult a counselor. If your concerns are related to your mental health and / or well-being, please consider seeing an expert mental health professional and make an appointment. These experts can help you deal with and solve your problems.
   • If you are looking for a psychotherapist, try the following website: http://locator.apa.org/

Part 3 of 3: Finding solutions

1. Investigate the problem. Many problems are so common that you can find enough information about them online. You can also include magazines or discussion forums in your research. A behavioral, financial, academic, or other issue that you may have is likely to be discussed somewhere online.
   • Consider talking to people who have experienced something similar to your problem, or who are experts in the topic related to it.
   • For example, if your problem is related to your studies, talk to your teacher or another student who has already had that subject or subject that you are having problems with.
   • Understanding how problems arise can help you deal with them better. Focusing your attention on solving the problem differently will help you reduce unproductive emotional tendencies, such as guilt and anxiety, which can thwart problem solving skills and capabilities.
2. Find an expert. If your problem is related to something an expert could help with, find it out. For example, if your problem is that you think you are overweight and you want to lose weight, you can enlist the help of a nutritionist or fitness trainer.
   • Just make sure that if you seek advice, it comes from a recognized expert in the field, giving you the assurance that they have the skills to help you with your particular problem.
   • There are those who claim to be an expert. If they don't have the correct papers, they aren't.
3. See how others solved the problem. Think about the people you know who have been in a similar situation and how they resolved it. Could that way work for you too? For example, if you are struggling with alcohol addiction, you can go to a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous and get a feel for the strategies other people have successfully used to stay sober.
   • Talk to other people about how they dealt with the problem you share and how they solved it. You may be so stuck in your problem that an obvious solution has escaped you, but other people have not.
4. Brainstorm about solutions. List possible solutions to your problem. Think about where to start, who to ask for help, and what resources you need. Make sure you think of all kinds of solutions and that you don't judge them too much as you come up with them. Just write down everything that comes to mind and see if it is a good or bad solution at a later stage.
   • Think about the anatomy of the problem. Most of the time, a problem isn't just a problem - it has consequences and affects other areas of your life. What part of the problem do you think you should address first?
   • For example, if your problem is that you never go on vacation, the sub-problem may be that it is difficult for you to take time off from work, and it is difficult for you to save money to be able to take a vacation. to afford.
   • You can tackle these sub-problems separately: You can save on eating out while talking to your boss about feeling burned out and needing a week to recover, arguing that you will eventually be more productive when you get the opportunity to recover.
5. Consider your solutions. Ask yourself a few questions that can help you decide whether to take one approach or another. Ask yourself the following:
   • Whether the solution will actually solve your problem.
   • How efficient the solution is in terms of time and other resources it requires.
   • How it feels to choose one solution over another.
   • What are the costs and benefits of the solution.
   • Whether this solution has worked for others in the past.
6. Put your plan into action. Once you know what you want to do and you have gathered all the resources, work out your solution and tackle your problem. If the first solution doesn't work, try Plan B or go back to the drawing board and come up with a new plan. Most importantly, keep going until you successfully overcome the problem.
   • As you carry out your plan, don't forget to reward yourself for small successes so you're more likely to stick with it when the going gets tough!
   • If your plans don't work, resist the temptation to avoid your problems. Remember not to be doomed. Just because one solution didn't fix the problem doesn't mean there isn't another method to solve your problem.