Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: Admit your mistake
• Method 2 of 3: Make infidelity a thing of the past
• Method 3 of 3: Try to rebuild your partner's trust
• Tips
• Warnings

Cheating is a blow to a relationship. She can mentally crush your partner and destroy all the trust that previously existed between you. In most cases, the fact of infidelity is already enough for a breakup. If you cheated on the person you swore you love, but still hope to save the relationship, you will have a hard time. There is no guarantee that you will be able to maintain the relationship after infidelity. However, if you truly love your partner and want to keep things the same, it will take time, a lot of effort, and a lot to sacrifice to express your regret and commitment to building better relationships in the future.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Admit your mistake

1. 1 Stop the affair. If you are truly determined to get your partner back, the first thing you need to do is end any outside ties and cut off all contact with that person. Tell him that you are no longer interested in further communication with him and remove him from your phone, email, social networks and other places where his contact information may be.
   • Your spouse's involvement in this process will help restore trust. You can remove this person from contacts in front of your partner and let him read and / or hear the farewell conversation.
   • If you are not ready to completely erase this person from your life, you will most likely end the relationship. Do not think that in the future you will be able to continue communicating with your partner, even without a hint of romance.
2. 2 Talk frankly. If you cheated on your loved one, you completely undermined your trust in yourself. Prove that you want to earn forgiveness by honestly and openly admitting your mistake. Explain the real reason for your action and give your partner time to ask questions or simply “digest” the information.
   • Before starting a conversation, think carefully about your speech. Before you speak, you must clearly understand what you have done, what you regret and how you will say it.
   • Most likely, your partner will be very upset about this news. Give him time to think things over in the most appropriate way for him. You may have to wait a few days or weeks for him to reflect on your words.
   • Let him know you want to discuss the situation frankly. Say, "I will answer any questions you may have, whenever they arise."
   • Your partner may have very intimate questions about your relationship with that person. It is very important to answer these questions sincerely, even if they make you feel ashamed, humiliated, or embarrassed.
3. 3 Apologize from the bottom of your heart. Admit guilt for your actions. Your partner did not hold you back by force, and none of his actions pushed you to cheat. Let him know that you are aware that it is your fault.
   • Say, “I know I have caused you incredible pain, and I will do everything in my power to restore our relationship. I'm really sorry and I would like to talk about how we can overcome this. "
   • Don't make a fake apology. Only apologize for what you really mean and what you think you did wrong. The person will notice the pretense, so the apology should come from the heart, and not from guilt.
4. 4 Ask for forgiveness. Forgiveness does not come quickly or easily. It will most likely take a long time, if it happens at all. However, if you're looking to get your partner back, it's important that they know early on that you want to be forgiven and are willing to work on it.
   • Report, “I do not expect you to forgive me right now. I know I need to deserve this. However, I pledge to do whatever is necessary to restore your love and trust. "
   • Letting your partner tell you how they feel and what they expect or require of you will be more inclined to forgive you. Ask about his feelings and listen carefully for the answers.
   • Perhaps at first he will be shocked or refuse to believe it. Give him time to reflect on your words, and also let him know that you are ready to discuss this issue at any time.
5. 5 Give him some space. Perhaps the person wants to be away from you after your confession. Show love and respect by giving him space. This does not mean that he wants to leave forever. However, it is important to give him time and space to heal his wounds. Please understand this. If he needs to distance himself from you, let him do so - this is an important part of the recovery process.
   • If you live together and your partner wants to be distant, stop by with a friend, family member, or hotel. If your partner wants to leave on his own, let him go. This is an unfamiliar situation for both of you, and he may prefer to distance himself a little.
   • Don't pressure your partner to come in or let you come back. Show respect by giving him the space he needs.
   • If physical intimacy was a part of your relationship, be prepared for the fact that it will not return immediately. Don't force your partner to do this. Let him come to you when he is ready.

Method 2 of 3: Make infidelity a thing of the past

1. 1 Make an appointment with a psychologist. Family therapy can be incredibly helpful after a partner has been unfaithful. Find a therapist who specializes in helping cheating couples. You and your partner should attend regular sessions to work on healing the relationship and stepping it in a new direction.
   • Together, you must decide to see a psychologist. Tell your partner that you would like to seek professional help to improve the relationship. Let him take an active part in the selection of the right specialist on an equal basis with you.
   • Set up a session schedule that works for both of you. Since you will be receiving therapy as a couple, you will need to set aside once a week or once every two weeks to do it together. Consider your partner's schedule when making an appointment.
   • Directly inform the psychologist so that you are here in order to leave cheating in the past. You should understand that recovery takes time, but the professional should know that you are looking for a long-term solution.
2. 2 Open paths for communication. Open and honest communication is essential to rebuild trust between you and your partner. Stay connected with him and be honest about your feelings and daily activities.
   • If your partner says he wants to know more about your movements and activities, be understanding and develop a plan for when you get in touch.
   • Talk openly about your daily thoughts and feelings with your partner. Allow yourself to show emotion and show effort or regret if you do.
   • It is equally important to let your partner speak up for himself. Start a conversation and try not only to listen, but also to really let his words through you and try to understand them. Listen actively, repeating what you hear.
3. 3 Leave confrontations in the past. You and your partner are more likely to fight as you try to move on. However, it is better to leave these confrontations in the past, rather than fight until victory. Try not to bring up old fights or unrelated questions, as this will only further upset your soul mate.
   • Try to "fight by the rules." Concentrate on this issue and do not touch on other issues. Stay calm and talk about specific examples and your emotional reactions instead of making broad generalizations.
   • Come to a clear conclusion. Don't feel like the issue is resolved just because you or your partner is starting to run out of energy. Even if you look at the situation differently, it is important to come to a real conclusion that satisfies both of you so that you can move on.

Method 3 of 3: Try to rebuild your partner's trust

1. 1 Make concessions. Perhaps the partner will ask you for certain things that will help him restore trust. For example, spending more time together or working on yourself to show that you have changed. Make concessions to your partner and make an effort to fulfill any of his requests (within reason).
   • Getting into a defensive posture, not talking about your pastime, or keeping him out of your space can raise suspicion in the person. If there is a reason why you cannot comply with a request, state it openly and discuss it frankly.
   • Say, “I am fully prepared to do this because I want to restore trust in our relationship. Maybe you can share with me what this request will give you, so that I can better understand the common goal we are working on? "
   • Some people find it helpful to hire a private investigator to make sure the cheating has completely stopped. Keep in mind that your partner can do the same, and make sure you don't mind this turn of events.
2. 2 Demonstrate the changes. You can promise anything you want, but your words won't be worth anything unless you prove to your partner that you are working to change. It is important here not only to be sincere, but also to fulfill obligations.
   • Show your dedication not only with sweeping gestures, but in your daily, deliberate effort. For example, take on things that your partner can't handle on their own, or help with things that you haven't helped with before.
   • You may need to work harder to listen to your partner when he complains about a lack of attention, help more around the house if he is overwhelmed with other work, or contribute to the relationship to show your dedication and care.
   • Another way that might help: Create a daily ritual for the two of you. For example, grab a decaf after dinner and talk about your day.
3. 3 Accept his answer. Your partner does not have to take you back, and chances are good that they will. In Russia, adultery is one of the most common reasons for divorce, not to mention the countless separations of unmarried couples. If a person decides that he cannot be with you after your betrayal, respect his choice and relieve him of your painful presence in his life.
   • Fighting with a partner who is reluctant to continue the relationship can cause severe emotional distress and harm. Show your love and respect his decision to end it all.
4. 4 Move on. Accept your partner's answer and don't live with the hope that he will change his mind. If he does not want to accept you after your betrayal, this is his right. He doesn't owe you anything. Learn from your mistake and move on.
   • If you really regret what you did, promise yourself not to do it again in the future. Use this opportunity to improve your romantic relationship in the future.
   • They don't just cheat. Take some time to think about what prompted you to take this step, and if there are any points that you need to work through in yourself.
   • Make an appointment with a psychologist if you feel you need professional help. Perhaps a psychologist can help you close the chapter of that relationship and work with you to make future relationship choices more productive.

Tips

• Do not throw accusations or try to justify your actions. The situation will not be saved by anything other than an admission of guilt, changes and discussion of the problem.
• If the person doesn't want to talk to you, leave them alone. Give it the space it needs. If he has deep feelings for you and if you are the love of his whole life, sooner or later, he will get in touch with you.

Warnings

• You can find many methods on the Internet that position themselves as a quick way to get your partner back forever. However, there is no instant healing path. Sincerity, hard work and time are the only things that can restore a relationship.