Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 2: Thinking about your life
• Part 2 of 2: Looking ahead

Every day is a new chapter for everyone. Do you feel stuck in your life? Do you want to start over and make some changes? Do you feel like Bill Murray in the movie Groundhog Day, in which you relive the same day over and over again? Starting over can be scary, but you deserve the life you want. Here are some techniques that can help you rethink your life, let go of the past and make a fresh new start.

To step

Part 1 of 2: Thinking about your life

1. Accept the past. You cannot start over in your life if you are still holding on to the past. Whether it's a relationship, work, family, or other situation, you have to accept what happened.
   • Acceptance does not necessarily mean forgiveness or understanding. It just means that you realize that something has happened, that you acknowledge it, and that you are ready to move on.
   • Remember that pain and suffering are not the same. You will feel pain and hurt if your life doesn't go in the direction you want it to go, but you don't have to suffer. Suffering is a choice. Nothing lasts forever, not even the pain. So acknowledge it, experience it and move on. Don't focus your life on the pain and the failures - get out of that story and avoid the drama (eg, "I will never find anyone else" or "I will never be able to get another job").
2. Remind yourself that things don't just happen. This is not to say that you are powerless and that things are just "doomed" to go a certain way. It is more that nothing has any meaning except the meaning you give it. It is up to you to make every event, incident, and moment in your life constructive or subversive.
   • The lessons you need to learn are not going to be obvious - you must instead find out what your life is telling you. What if, for example, you are asked to step down from a position in your career because your ideas are too big for the company or you want to go in a different direction than what management has in mind for the company? Rather than taking this as a personal failure, see it as confirmation that you and your boss have fundamentally different visions and that it may be time to say goodbye so that you can realize your vision elsewhere.
3. Make an inventory of your failures and successes. You can't "ignore life," so instead of feeling down when things don't go as planned, ask yourself, "What works in my situation or circumstances, or has worked?"
   • Write it all down. Keep notes for yourself about your successes, even the little things. Every night, write about something that went well that day. Focusing on the positive helps to draw more of it to you!
   • Then think about how you can further promote what does, or has worked, for you. For example, you may realize that you were great at customer contact, but the location was not right for your business and you need to change locations to an area with more pedestrian traffic. Think about what works or has worked for you and how you can improve it even further.
4. Do not announce that you are going to start over. Just do it. You don't have to confirm your choices to make a change in your life. You don't have to tell or ask other people what they think you should do - we often consult others when we feel insecure so that we feel better about our plan, or to prepare others for the transformation. But this is your life. Move on and people will grow with you. Those who don't want to come along may not be meant to be in your life in the first place.
   • Your next steps in life are about no one but you. Ignore what everyone else is saying. Much of their resistance will be about them and not you, as they question their own lives because of your changes. Remember, you alone should be comfortable with your choices and decisions.

Part 2 of 2: Looking ahead

1. Discover your purpose. Thinking about the meaning of your life is one of the first major steps towards major change.
   • What are you good at? What do you like to do? What are you passionate about? What makes you feel important? Answering these questions is key to finding out what makes you happy and what gives you a fulfilling life.
   • Let's say you love yoga and have been taking yoga classes three times a week for five years. Maybe it is not your hobby, but your passion! Maybe you want to go from a student to a teacher. Think about what really makes you feel satisfied in your life and makes you feel like you are making a difference, and make that the core of your new life.
   • Life is only worth living when you are really alive. If you've always wanted to learn yoga, why not go for it? You only get one life, so make sure you do the right things with it. Don't wait for a reason to start living your life the way you want.
2. Set goals and make decisions. Once you have set your overall goal and big life goals, decide specifically how you are going to achieve these goals and then make the necessary changes. Are you going to break up with your current partner? Are you moving to a new city? Are you going back to school?
   • Set short, medium and long term goals. Write them down and put them somewhere you can see them every day (e.g. a refrigerator door or taped to your bedroom mirror).
   • Get your life in order. You cannot change your life if you live in a disorderly, disorganized way. Once you know exactly what change you want to make and what goals you want to achieve, you can start making plans to make the necessary changes.
3. Take a new route. Do something different and surprise yourself - you'll probably learn something you didn't know about who you are and what you can do.
   • One of the best ways to push yourself out of a life you're not happy with is to start doing something completely different. Take a trip to a place you've never been before. Learn a new language. Start with a new sport, be it gymnastics, kickboxing or cycling.
   • Even if you think you might be horrible about it, try something new anyway. Trying something new challenges us mentally and physically and also gives us new excitement for life as we can see the endless possibilities of the next day.
   • Yes, the unknown is scary, but it is also just as scary to do what you know and move on down a disappointing and unsatisfying path. You may feel nervous or insecure about starting over, but you need to consider if this is worse than the disappointment you feel as well as the lack of fulfillment in your life as it is now.
4. Make mindfulness your new motto. Live in the moment and know that it is the only moment that really matters. Give it your full attention. It is your reality. And when that moment is over, move on to the next moment. Are you still breathing? Yes. Then consider that moment treated successfully! Go to the next moment that takes you one step closer to living your life.
   • Take things one day at a time. This may sound clichéd, but that doesn't make it any less true. Do what today must be done - not tomorrow or next week. This is what makes starting over manageable. Trying to plan for the next 365 days may seem impossible, but contemplating the day ahead is possible!
5. Accept yourself. You don't know everything. You make mistakes. Knowing how to change your car's oil, cook a fancy French dinner, or understand all the ins and outs of macro economics doesn't make you a better person. It just makes you someone more knowledgeable about certain things. Is it knowledge you want or do you want to prove something to others? Ask yourself why it is important. Does it make you happy? If the answer is no, then stop! You can't do everything and you don't have to.
   • If you really want to learn how to do something, go for it! But if you're doing something to prove to others that you can do it or that you're an all-rounder, stop it. You are enough as you are and you don't have to be anymore. You don't have to prove anything to anyone.
6. Trust others and ask for help. Once you're comfortable with the idea that you don't need to know everything, take a look at what you're doing that isn't your expertise, your skills, or something you're just not interested in. Outsource it: Pay someone to change your oil or wash the windows. Make decisions about how you want to spend your time and what you can afford.
   • Ask for help when you need it, and rely on people with expertise in a particular area if you're unsure how to do something. Needing help, asking and hiring doesn't make you weak, but smart and resourceful. Everyone has different skills and no one is an island.
7. Prepare for moments of weakness. Sometimes you feel like your new plan isn't working and you want to return to your old life. Take such moments into account.
   • This could mean erasing the phone numbers of people you would call or text in such situations (when you are down and need confirmation), such as those of an ex-girlfriend or girlfriend. It may mean not buying junk food if you know you are a stress eater.
   • Moments of weakness are common. We all stumble and often have doubts about what's best for us in the United States future' and what now is easy. Challenge your "now" and replace it with your long-term vision for your life.
8. Celebrate your progress. Don't forget to acknowledge all progress toward your new goal. Some of your milestones can be very long-term and sometimes you can lose track of where you are working towards. Remember that the long run consists of several short paths and successes that you can celebrate along the way. Feel good about every step you take toward that new life, whether it's ending a relationship with a person who is bad for you, sending out resumes, or embarking on a course in something you've never tried before. All these little pieces help you create and realize the new life you have established for yourself.
9. Keep moving. Life is always on the move and you should be too. Stopping to smell the roses and embrace the moment is one thing, but just stopping and standing still is another. You don't want your life to come to a standstill. There are always new people, new opportunities and new experiences waiting for you and you should seek them out!