Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 3: Working as a team
• Part 2 of 3: Being considerate
• Part 3 of 3: Knowing what not to do
• Tips
• Warnings
• Necessities

If you want to have a long and successful relationship, there must first be mutual respect. You need to make sure that you see yourself and your partner as a team, and that you are as thoughtful, honest and compassionate as possible. However, no one is perfect, so you should be willing to apologize sincerely if you made a mistake. If you and your partner are both willing to make an effort, then you can have a respectful and fulfilling relationship.

To step

Part 1 of 3: Working as a team

1. Think of each other as true partners. If you want to respect your partner, then you really should be able to see you as a team. Think as a team in your joint decisions, and always think of your partner when making individual decisions. You should feel as if you are pursuing common goals that make both of you stronger; not as if you only have opposite needs and wants. If you can truly see you as a unity, then you will be able to give your partner the respect he / she deserves.
   • When you and your partner go out into the world, consider yourself a united front. Although you may not always agree, you should work to treat each other with kindness and dignity. You must work to make decisions that will help each other.
   • Of course, you will not feel the same about everything, but you can practice saying "we" more often when you make a decision together — instead of starting each sentence with "I".
2. If you disagree with your partner, discuss the situation respectfully. You can't always agree with your partner, of course, and that's okay at all. It is extremely important to resolve disagreements in a respectful manner. If you say something like, "That's a stupid idea ..." or "I can't imagine you really want to ..." your partner will get angry about it. It will make him / her on the defensive, and that will not lead to a productive conversation. Instead, take the time to listen to your partner and respond as kindly as possible to his / her opinion.
   • Know that your partner will be much less likely to share his / her ideas or compromise if you start out aggressive or angry.
   • Instead of being condescending or mean when you don't agree with something, say something like, "I understand why you see it that way ..." or "I don't think that's the right option right now ..." that how you say something is at least as important as what you say.
3. Learn to tolerate and appreciate each other's differences. As the relationship progresses, you will find that you and your partner are fundamentally different from each other. Maybe you're a bit messy, and he's just a little bit precise; maybe she is very social, but you are quite shy. You can of course adjust a little to become more attuned to each other, but you cannot completely change yourself. You will have to learn to accept and appreciate the differences between you and your partner if you really want to be able to respect your partner.
   • If you are a mess and your partner is afraid of contamination, then you will of course have to show respect for his / her limits. And while you probably won't be able to keep his / her standard, make sure you keep your side of the house clean.
   • If you are bothered by certain things that you know your partner cannot change, such as an obsession with the dog, then you will have to respect them. You will have to learn to live with that if you want to continue a healthy relationship.
4. Acknowledge your partner's contribution. In order to respect your partner, you need to let him / her know when he / she is doing things right. If you are constantly complaining or being negative, you will never be able to be happy together. Let your partner know how much he / she means to you if they cheer you up when you've had a bad day, if she cooks deliciously for you, if he's always nice, or she's always considerate.
   • You can do this by saying "thank you" and being specific, by writing a love note, or by taking the time to acknowledge positive behavior.
   • If you never acknowledge all those nice, sweet things your partner does for you, he'll take it as a disrespectful gesture. That way it looks like you are taking him / her for granted.
5. Respect yourself. First of all, if you want to be respected, you have to respect yourself. You should treat your body with respect, avoid behaviors that make you lose your self-esteem (such as alcohol abuse or being rude to strangers), and behave so that people will see that you deserve them. If that foundation is not there, it will be very difficult for you to respect your partner, and vice versa.
   • Make sure you really respect yourself and take care of yourself. Only then are you ready to respect someone else.
6. Learn to compromise. Another way you can respect your partner is to compromise when you can't agree on something. When making a decision together, the most important thing is to listen to each other first. Make sure you know how the other person feels about a particular issue. Next, you should be able to respectfully discuss the pros and cons of the situation and find a solution that you both can live with.
   • When it comes to compromise, it's a lot better to be happy than to be right. Learn when to go to war and when to give your partner his / her way better. If you really want something, you can fight for it.
   • In the case of smaller decisions, such as where to eat, it is best to take turns.
7. Have mutual responsibility. If you and your partner are to respect each other, then there will have to be mutual responsibility. This goes beyond apologizing for doing / saying something wrong. The point is that you are aware at all times if you have treated your partner disrespectfully, and that your partner is also aware if he / she has treated you disrespectfully. As long as you are both self-aware, you understand what it means to treat each other disrespectfully, and you can hold each other accountable for each other's actions, a long and healthy relationship is ahead.
   • Suppose you arrived home two hours later than you agreed, and that while you know that your wife was really looking forward to watching a movie together on the couch. In that case, you have treated your partner disrespectfully, and you should take responsibility for what you did.
   • Suppose your partner invited a girlfriend to something you thought might actually be a date. In that case, she should take responsibility for treating you disrespectfully.
   • As long as the mistakes don't always come from one side, and you have no problem discussing the mistakes with each other, nothing is wrong and you are well on your way.

Part 2 of 3: Being considerate

1. Apologize if you made a mistake. Apologizing for really screwing up is a great way to show that you respect your partner. Rather than denying or trying to dismiss the mistakes, it is much better to show that you are really sorry. Don't just say the words, really mean them. Look your partner in the eye, put your phone aside, and show how sorry you are about what happened - show how badly you want to make it up to you.
   • Don't say something like, "I'm sorry you feel that way ..." or "Sorry you got so angry when I ..." Take responsibility for your actions, and make it clear that you know you were wrong.
   • Actions speak louder than words, of course. Don't just say you're sorry, but really do your best to make sure it doesn't happen to you again.
2. Put yourself in your partner's shoes more often. Another way you can be considerate and show genuine respect to your partner is to see how he / she feels about certain things. Do this when you argue, when there is a disagreement, or when you need to make a decision. If you know her father is in hospital, think about what she's going through before you argue about the dishes; If your ex-boyfriend is in town and your current boyfriend doesn't particularly like that you want to date him, consider how you would feel if he hooked up with an ex.
   • You can develop a lot of respect for your partner by putting yourself in his / her mind a little more often.
   • This is an excellent way to show respect to someone, whether they are your best friend or your wife.
3. Take the time to really listen to your partner. Listening is a skill that many people struggle with in this day and age of multitasking and technology. If you want to show your partner that you respect them, do your best to really listen when they talk to you. We're not talking about interrupting, giving unsolicited advice, or waiting your turn, but taking the time to actually pay attention to what your partner has to tell you. It's about appreciating his / her thoughts, experiences and ideas.
   • Put your phone away, make eye contact, and don't let your gaze wander; give your partner your undivided attention when talking to you.
   • You can also practice listening actively. You can repeat what your partner has said. Just make sure you translate it into your own words to show that you really understand. You can say something like, "I understand that you are frustrated because your boss doesn't value you ..." to show that you are really paying attention to him / her.
   • You don't have to nod emphatically every two seconds or say "that you know". The words you use when your partner has finished talking really show that you listened.
4. Respect your partner's boundaries. Everyone has his / her own limits. If you want to respect your partner sincerely, then you will need to know their boundaries and be willing to respect those boundaries. Maybe your partner is very attached to his privacy and hates it when you flip through his old photos or talk about his past when others are around; maybe he doesn't like you at all teasing him about the fact that he used to be a little fat. Whatever the boundaries are, you have to recognize them; you must be caring and respectful enough to respect those boundaries.
   • In successful relationships it is extremely important to respect each other's privacy. Don't just assume that you have the right to rummage through his / her computer or phone.
   • You must also respect his / her belongings. If he doesn't like it when you borrow his favorite watch, then you should understand.
   • If you're struggling with a particular boundary that your partner has set, such as not wanting to talk about her ex-husband, try to strike up a respectful conversation.
5. Encourage your partner to use his / her potential. If you want to respect your partner, then you will only wish the very best for him / her. You should be there for your partner to help him / her get the most out of his / her life; you should be there for your partner to help make all of his / her dreams a reality. You should be there for your partner to tell him / her that she is going to do a great job at that job interview, that he will break his personal record at the next marathon, and that she is able to finish that novel where she started five years ago.
   • Never deprive your partner. Never make him / her feel like he / she could never make his / her dreams come true. If you have good reasons to think that certain goals are unrealistic, have an amicable conversation about them.
   • To have a truly successful relationship, you and your partner need to be better together than apart. Your relationship must be greater than the sum of its parts. Take care of your partner and encourage him / her to get better than he / she already is.
   • If utilizing their potential gets in the way of utilizing your potential, don't be mean about it. Have a good conversation about exactly what that means.
6. Be compassionate. Compassion is extremely important if you want to maintain a successful relationship and show respect for your partner. If you really care about him / her, then you should be able to show him / her love, compassion, and forgiveness - especially when he / she is going through a rough time. You need to be able to see that he / she is going through his / her own struggles and that you cannot just ignore his / her feelings because he / she is not doing exactly what you want.
   • If your partner really needs you, make sure you show him / her love and affection. While you obviously can't feel sorry for him / her all the time, and everyone's patience has limits, you should show your partner compassion when he / she really needs it.
7. Be honest. If you want to be considerate and respect your partner, then above all you will have to be honest with him / her. Don't lie about where you went last night or do anything that could make him / her mistrust you. While you may not find it easy to reveal everything about yourself, and there may be things you prefer to keep private, you should avoid lying as much as possible. If he / she finds out that you have damaged his / her trust, it will be difficult to regain that trust.
   • There are, of course, times when a white lie can't hurt. But if you make it a habit to lie to your partner, then there is no respect whatsoever.
8. Give your partner space. It also shows respect if you give your partner the space he / she needs. If your partner wants to be alone for a while to do his / her own thing, it's not respectful if you don't take that into account, if you're constantly interfering with it, or if you keep insisting on spending time together to spend. Everyone needs time for themselves, which is healthy and normal. Time for yourself is important to maintain your independence. If you can't understand why your partner would rather take time for themselves than hang out with you, then you're not being respectful.
   • If your partner wants to have some time for themselves, it doesn't necessarily have to do with you. You should know that some people just need a little privacy to get themselves back together. Respect that.
   • If you feel like your partner always prefers to make time for themselves rather than for you, then that may be something you should talk about for a while.

Part 3 of 3: Knowing what not to do

1. Don't humiliate your partner in public. It is very disrespectful if you are mean to your partner in public or criticize him / her in front of his / her friends. You should think of each other as teammates. If you have problems with your partner, discuss them at home — not when other people are around. Saying nasty things to him / her in public, or being ugly to him / her when other people are around, will make him / she feel awful. He / she will hate you, and the friends and family members will also start to feel very uncomfortable.
   • If you get ugly with your partner in public, make sure you apologize for it. Unfortunately, you cannot always keep a cool head.
   • Rather than publicly humiliating or debunking your partner, praise him / her better. Make sure he / she starts to feel better when other people are around.
2. Don't tell your friends bad things about your partner. Don't tell your friends and family about the 50 things that annoy you about your partner - don't hang your dirty laundry outside. While you can turn to loved ones for advice when you are struggling, avoid getting into the habit of killing your partner over and over again. If you continuously slash your partner, he / she and your relationship will be a mess. It is therefore far from respectful.
   • If you are really serious about your partner, then you should be on his / her side. If you humiliate him / her when he / she isn't around, it shows that you don't respect him / her very much.
   • Think about it. How would you like it if your partner kept telling their friends horrible things about you? That wouldn't really show much respect, would it?
3. Don't talk disrespectfully about members of the opposite sex. Okay, we're all human. And that's why we appreciate beautiful people, even when we're head over heels in love. That said, if you keep rattling on and on about those "hot chicks" or "handsome guys," your partner is not going to like it. It is therefore very disrespectful to do that, especially if you do it in front of your partner and your friends; it shows that you don't take the relationship too seriously.
   • Of course, some people are more sensitive to this than others, but as a rule of thumb you may want to avoid it.
   • Even if your partner is not around, it is wise not to talk about it too much. Of course, you don't have to deny that there are other attractive people on the planet, but if you keep talking about it, your friends will think you don't respect your partner.
4. Don't wait for your feelings to boil. If you really respect your partner, then you don't wait for the straw to overflow. If something really bothers you, you have the respect to confront your partner with it. Do it calmly and calmly, and have a serious conversation about what is bothering you. Don't wait for your partner to figure out what's going on on their own, don't bring up the issue in public, or wait until you really can't take it anymore - that's not very respectful of your partner or your relationship.
   • If you don't really want to talk about the things that are bothering you, then you are probably being passive-aggressive with your partner. That is not very respectful either.
   • Even if you've had a really busy week, take the time to talk to your partner about what's bothering you. If your partner was angry with you, wouldn't you want to know?
5. Don't take your partner for granted. Taking your partner for granted is perhaps the most disrespectful thing you can do. If you don't appreciate what he / she does for you, or what he / she means to you, then you don't recognize that he / she has a positive impact on your life. If you want to respect your partner and show him / her how much he / she means to you, then you will have to tell your partner how much you care about him / her every day.
   • Sometimes you don't even realize you took your partner for granted, and you only find out when you can't remember the last time you told him / her you love him / her. Make sure your partner knows exactly how much you care about them, no matter how busy you are.

Tips

• You are not in charge of your partner. Just because the two of you are dating or married doesn't mean you can be boss of him / her.
• Never underestimate your partner, even if his / her reasoning seems superficial.
• Don't let the feelings you're experiencing now ruin the relationship.
• Love is about persistence; Patience is a virtue.
• Stick to your story. If you've said something before, no matter how you've said it, it's best to stick with it. You can rephrase your comments later when you cool down a bit. Example: "When I said ______, I didn't mean ______. I meant ______."
• One learns by doing. Unless you know what lies ahead, don't force things if it doesn't seem to work out.
• Not everyone communicates in the same way. Try to learn how your partner communicates. This will improve mutual respect.
• If you feel like you have to withhold something from your partner, it probably means that you know what would hurt or upset him / her. You probably do well to leave it.

Warnings

• Respect is of the utmost importance. It's not about learning anything; it's about treating people as you would like to be treated. If you want to be treated with respect, then it goes without saying that you should treat your partner (and the rest of the world) with respect too.

Necessities

• Love and affection - only love can make you act respectfully.
• Listening skills - if you are a good listener you can solve problems more easily. After all, there is mutual understanding.
• Responsibility - if you take care of your partner both physically and emotionally, he / she will respect you for it.