Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 2: Be a Good Listener
• Part 2 of 2: Help him get distracted

Is your boyfriend upset? If he is feeling depressed and lethargic, there are several ways to cheer him up. Learn to be a good listener and come up with original ways to distract the guy from bad thoughts.

Steps

Part 1 of 2: Be a Good Listener

1. 1 Stop constantly asking why he was upset. It takes a little time for guys to think things over before talking to you about their problem. Look at it the other way: if he is upset and you notice it, you already know enough. It’s not that hard to understand. Just be ready to listen, but don't try to rush things.
   • Instead, just say that you notice that something is bothering him. Your genuine concern will make the guy feel better, and he will be quite comfortable telling you about his problem.
   • Most likely, this does not concern you. If this is true, then you may worsen the situation if you try to get into his affairs. If you want the guy to tell you what the matter is, give him some personal space and time to calm down and think things over.
2. 2 Talk about something else. If your boyfriend is still withdrawn, show that you care about him, but talk about other topics. Ask how his day went, talk about your business, and see if the guy starts to open up to you.
   • Talk about something that interests him. If the guy is following the match, give him the opportunity to talk about what is happening there. Show that you are interested in the things that he likes - this will help him to relax. Even if you do not say anything, you will still support him.
   • Don't be too persistent, but watch the events unfold. For some guys, it only takes a few minutes to calm down and cool down, and that's perfectly normal. Some people need more time - and this is also quite natural.
3. 3 Just be there. Sometimes you don't have to do anything special to cheer up a guy, you just need to be close to him. Just be alone. Sit together in an embrace. Watch the movie and relax - let the guy think about the situation himself. Perhaps after a while he himself will want to open up to you.
   • Pay attention to his body language, his words, try to understand his tone and emotions. Perhaps now it is better not to speak, but to be silent. After spending a little time in silence, you will want to break it. Let the guy sit for a while in silence, and then he himself starts the conversation.
4. 4 When he starts talking, listen to him carefully. If the guy starts sharing his thoughts with you, just sit down and listen. Let him lead the conversation. As soon as he starts to speak, he will feel relief - and this is already a great achievement. Therefore, you will immediately notice how both of you will feel better.
   • Once the guy tells you about his problem, don't try to immediately translate the topic of the conversation. Otherwise, he will feel that you are not listening to him, since you are trying to change the subject so quickly. Consider his words and show him that you understand his feelings.
   • The feeling when a loved one hears and understands you helps to collect thoughts. Sometimes trouble comes from uncertainty and confused thoughts, and a heart-to-heart conversation helps to understand yourself.
5. 5 Your goal is to simply listen, not try to solve the problem. It takes a lot of patience and time to cheer up a guy.If you start trying to cheer him up, he will feel like a child, as if you are fiddling with him like a parent. Therefore, you should not try to solve his problems and be optimistic. Just say, “Yes, it’s not easy. I am very sorry that it happened. "
   • If a guy is specifically interested in your opinion on what to do, give your opinion. If you don't know, invite him to talk to another person he trusts who can help him.
   • Don't be a mommy for him. If you try to fix the situation with a joke or something funny, chances are you will only scare the guy away from you. If you do not want to be with him at this difficult moment, you better leave. Leave the guy for a while to figure out his problem on his own. Come back when he's ready to talk.

Part 2 of 2: Help him get distracted

1. 1 Think about what works best for the guy in his situation. All guys are different and there are many ways to solve problems. Someone will most of all want to go to football, while for others the best medicine will be a big waste of money, as well as time.
   • If your boyfriend is just really annoyed after work, if he is tired and hungry, just feed him and give him some rest, and then think about what to do. Most likely, after he rests, his mood will improve. And too active actions, on the contrary, will ruin the mood.
   • If something more serious has happened, or if your boyfriend cannot find a way out of the situation on his own, do not wait, come up with something yourself. You don't have to ask, “How are you feeling?” A million times until the guy gets annoyed. Better say, “I bought tickets for this movie. Let's stop by and have a pizza in advance. "
2. 2 Let the guy spend time with his friends. Most likely, his friends faced this situation much more often than you. Likewise, if he is having relationship problems with you, it will probably be easier for him to talk to friends about it first, rather than you. This is normal behavior in a relationship.
   • Plan something for him, if possible. Don't tell his friends exactly what happened. Say a general phrase: “It seems that Dima is upset about something. Would you like to go somewhere to unwind this Sunday? "
3. 3 Give him the opportunity to change his surroundings. If the guy really doesn't feel like talking, offer an activity to get him out of the house and unwind. Even if it's not the most interesting activity for him (for example, going to the grocery store), it will still be easier for him to concentrate.
   • Take on some household chores that you usually do together. Go to a store and ask him to help you carry things or groceries. Do not demand, but ask. Find some reason to lure him out of the house. For example, you may urgently need his help when choosing something. Just help him keep his head occupied with something else.
   • You can give preference to little things. For example, take a walk together and eat some ice cream. Even watching a movie on TV can help distract you. Check out some funny pictures and videos on the internet if you like.
4. 4 Sit in an embrace. A little physical contact is very helpful when you are trying to cheer someone up. Hugging stimulates the release of oxytocin into the bloodstream, which can help you feel pleasure and reduce stress and anxiety. Even a little physical contact can work wonders!
   • Gentle touches to the upper back and arm are automatic signals. They help reduce stress and promote the release of endorphins, which will help the guy calm down. Perhaps you want to do even more? The decision is up to you.
   • Men can be irritable, but at home they still need peace of mind, both emotional and physical.If you know this person well enough, you will know exactly what he will like and what not.
5. 5 Make him his favorite treat to cheer him up a bit. You know what they say: "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach." If he loves chocolate covered bacon, go to the store and surprise him. If this is not possible for you, prepare his favorite dish yourself. Here are some good options:
   • Chicken and waffles
   • Steak
   • Ruben's sandwich
   • Cookies with sauce
   • Lasagna
   • Pizza
6. 6 Play video games with him. Is your boyfriend a gamer? If you show interest in anything he likes, he will greatly appreciate it. Playing together can help take your mind off problems, even if it takes time, and can help you bond. Give in to him so that he wins once or twice.
   • If your boyfriend is not a gamer, pick something that you just enjoy doing together. Does he like horror and baseball? Be patient and watch the game or horror movie to the end! It will mean a lot to him.
7. 7 Improvise. To cheer up and support someone is not such an easy thing, besides, everyone reacts to such attempts in different ways. In general, you always need to give a little personal space and time, and then find an individual approach. Remember that there is not a single person who is constantly lucky.