Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: Constructive Communication
• Method 2 of 3: Information Required
• Method 3 of 3: Supporting Others
• Tips

The upbringing of a teenager is associated with various difficulties. Parents have to deal with an emotional, changeable personality that requires more and more independence. If your teen is sexually active, your relationship can become even more complicated. Try to establish constructive communication and explain important points. Use the following tips to help you improve your relationship with your sexually active teenager.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Constructive Communication

1. 1 Ask questions. One of the best approaches to the situation is to establish constructive communication, which is even more important after the adolescent's sex life. You need productive conversations, a large part of which will be your questions.
   • If you are not sure that the teenager has started sexual activity, then you can simply ask: "How is your relationship with Borey developing? Do you have sex?"
   • Do not approach this topic with a swoop. It all depends on the person, but many teenagers may feel embarrassed by such a question.
   • Say, "I want to talk about something important. Do you have a moment to spare?"
   • If you are confident in the sexual activity of a teenager, there are many questions to ask him. Some of the most important ones are "Are you protecting yourself?" and "Is there anything I can do to help?"
2. 2 Be direct. It's best to be direct about sex. This will show that you are in the mood for a sincere and open conversation. The teenager will understand that his answers must be clear and unambiguous.
   • Say: "I know that you and Nastya are having sex, and I want to make sure that you remember about the need for contraception."
   • You can also express your support directly. Say, "If necessary, we can talk at any time."
   • Be clear about your facts and opinions about sex. For example, make it clear that oral sex is also a type of sex life.
3. 3 Maintain an open mind. When discussing this topic with your teenager, put your emotions and personal feelings aside. No one is taking away your right to your beliefs and values, but it’s just as important that your teenager is not afraid to talk to you. Promise to remain objective.
   • Say: "I love you and support you, even if I do not always agree with your decisions in this matter."
   • Learn to listen. Use words and gestures to show your openness and attention.
   • Nod your head and maintain eye contact.Brief business phrases will also show that you are listening carefully: "Yes, I understand. Tell me a little more."
   • Don't expect your teen to share your feelings about sex. Perhaps you remained innocent before marriage, and your teenager is not happy with this option. Show understanding.
4. 4 Try to build honest relationships. Don't drop this topic after your initial conversation. Maintain open communication. Stay up to date and monitor how your teen handles new experiences.
   • You don't have to ask questions head-on every time. You can ask: "How are you doing with Dima? Are you having fun?"
   • Develop a sincere relationship with your teen. Make it clear that you are always ready to listen and share advice.
   • Make sure that all your communication is not limited to conversations about the sex life of a teenager. Don't forget to talk about other topics.
   • Ask about other aspects: "How are you doing with your creative work in history?" It's also important to be interested in your teen's relationship with other friends.
   • Have fun. Don't let the topic of sex change your relationship. Keep doing what you both enjoy. Watch football or cook dinner together.
5. 5 Start the conversation early. It is not necessary to wait until the onset of the child's sexual activity in order to talk to him about sex. Raise this issue at an early age. It's up to you to determine the right time, but many parents start teaching their children about sex at the end of elementary school.
   • Explain what sex is. Thanks to this, the child will not be confused by the rumors and speculations of other children.
   • Tell them right away that you are always ready to discuss this topic. By the time you start having sex, your teen is more likely to make contact to discuss the issue.
   • You can tell your child about your views and beliefs about sex. Help your teen to raise the emotional side of sex in addition to the physical side.

Method 2 of 3: Information Required

1. 1 Explain important points. First of all, it is necessary to instill in the adolescent responsibility in the matter of sex. It is important to show concern for your teen's safety, even if you disagree with his or her decision to have sex. Provide all the necessary information.
   • Your explanations can be very informative. Tell me how important it is to be with a partner who respects and cares for you.
   • You can also use scientific information. Tell your teen about sexually transmitted diseases and possible routes of infection.
   • Explain that copulation is not the only form of sex. A teenager should understand that it is possible to become infected with a sexually transmitted disease after oral sex.
   • Family planning centers provide a variety of information about sex in general and about the sex life of adolescents. Use the brochures of these organizations.
2. 2 Tell us about the consequences. Explain to your teenager how serious sexual intercourse is. Explain the possible physical consequences, including an unplanned pregnancy.
   • Sexually transmitted diseases are also a possible consequence. Ask how the teenager is going to avoid these problems.
   • Remember to consider the emotional implications. Explain that having sex can lead to a new level of emotional intimacy between people.
   • Teach your teen to take care of his feelings. Does he know how to express his emotional needs?
3. 3 Provide contraception. Make sure your teen has contraception. In this case, you will ensure that your child is practicing safe sex. It's important to show concern for your teen's safety, even if you disagree with his or her decision to have sex.
   • Give your teen condoms. Anyone of any sex who is sexually active must have condoms available.
   • You don't want your teenager to rely only on a partner. Everyone is responsible for his own body.
   • If you have a daughter, take her to the doctor to prescribe birth control.Your doctor can help you decide if pills or other hormonal drugs can be used.
4. 4 Maintain healthy relationships. Advise your teenager not to have sex with a partner who cannot be trusted. Explain the essence of a healthy relationship. For example, they have a place for trust, respect and kindness.
   • Explain that you will always maintain a healthy relationship with your child. Say: "It seems that you are happy with Masha. I am happy for you."
   • Voice all your concerns. Say the following: "It worries me that Tolik constantly controls you. Don't you think so?"
   • Explain that you trust your teen but only encourage sex if the relationship is healthy.
5. 5 Set boundaries. Talking about sex does not mean that everything is now permissible for a teenager. All boundaries are an important resource. They will allow your teen to learn responsibility and respect.
   • Set boundaries that work for you. For example, make it clear that your teenager shouldn't have sex in your home.
   • Don't be afraid to set your own rules. The onset of sexual activity does not mean that a teenager has become a completely independent person and can do whatever he wants.
   • Explain that despite striving for adult behavior, the teenager remains your child and must abide by the rules in the home.
6. 6 Share your values. The teenager needs to know the values ​​of his family. Be open about your feelings about intimacy. This will give the teenager your point of view.
   • Say, "Our family takes intimacy very seriously. It is important to think about the consequences of your actions."
   • You can also explain how faith affects your attitude towards sex. For example, many people find sex unacceptable before marriage.
   • Your teen needs to understand that these values ​​are important to you, but you are always ready to listen to their own opinion.

Method 3 of 3: Supporting Others

1. 1 Look for information for yourself. Sometimes a relationship with a sexually active teenager can be overwhelming. Emotional flashes are possible. It is not always clear what to say. It's quite normal.
   • Look for information that will be useful to both of you. You can talk to a doctor you trust.
   • Ask him to tell your teen about sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy, and other consequences. Also ask how parents should behave in these situations.
   • Family planning centers are also a reliable source of information. They can provide parenting brochures or learn how to deal with emotions.
2. 2 Help your teen find reliable people. It is important that the child trusts you. However, other sources of support will not interfere with him. It is gratifying when you can discuss the situation with different people.
   • Try to engage your spouse. Explain that your teen needs support.
   • Other family members can also be a source of support. If your daughter has a close relationship with her aunt, then ask her to raise the issue.
   • Offer your teen to see a doctor. Sometimes it is helpful to get an objective opinion from the outside.
3. 3 Monitor your emotions. The main concern right now is how the child is coping with new experiences. At the same time, it is important not to forget about yourself. Many parents experience emotional difficulties when they hear that their child is sexually active.
   • Your feelings are perfectly normal. Many parents are not ready for their children to grow up and may feel sad or anxious about it.
   • An emotional outburst shouldn't surprise you. Try to find support for yourself.
   • Talk to your partner or close friend.
   • Don't forget about your own life. Your adolescent sex life should not become the center of your perception of the world.
4. 4 Seek help from a specialist. If you or a teenager can't do it on their own, then contact a professional. Sometimes it doesn't hurt to talk to a counselor to deal with emotional changes.
   • Seek professional advice from other people.Try talking to a school counselor or nurse.
   • Online consultations will also come to the rescue.

Tips

• Low self-esteem is a common cause of teen sex, according to research, so help your child believe in themselves.
• Be patient. You and your teenager need to adjust to new realities.
• Make sure your teen is aware of all the consequences of having sex.