Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: How to set yourself up for success
• Method 2 of 3: How to Use Persuasion Strategies
• Method 3 of 3: How to Accept Only Positive Answers
• Tips

Do you often turn to people with requests and do not know how to get the desired answer? Constant rejection at home, work or school is stressful and frustrating. Alas, there is no surefire way, but there are behavioral strategies that greatly increase the chances of success!

Steps

Method 1 of 3: How to set yourself up for success

1. 1 Speak confidently and competently. When addressing a person with a question or request, one should take the matter seriously. Asking the question correctly is a surefire way to increase the likelihood of success. Speak confidently and deliberately, do not use "e" or "hmm" and do not hesitate.
   • It should be remembered that mastery takes practice.Practice saying your question or request before contacting. You don't have to rehearse word for word to avoid speaking like a robot. It is enough just to repeat the request until it starts to sound competent and confident. If you are better able to perceive visual information, then try writing down the text and repeating it clearly.
   • Rehearse in front of a mirror to notice any problematic non-verbal cues (touch your hair or don't look into your eyes).
2. 2 Nod your head while addressing. Research shows that doing this can help you feel confident and in a positive mood so that the listener (your boss, client, or loved one) will also see you as confident and knowledgeable.
   • Be careful not to use this non-verbal cue too often. Nod when it feels natural. Do not overdo it, otherwise the action will only distract from the words, and not emphasize their meaning.
3. 3 Demonstrate the benefits of your offer. People are more likely to agree with you if they think your idea might be useful. Show how the listener will benefit if they agree with you.
   • For example, if you want to take a break from work, ask your boss about the busiest period of the company, and then develop your thought. Your boss will see a benefit in giving you a vacation: you have been prudent and ask for a vacation at a convenient time for the company so that the absence of an employee does not affect the bottom line.
   • If you want to go on a date with your spouse, but for this you need to ask the older child to look after the younger ones, then offer pocket money in return, the opportunity to come home later, or take your car for the weekend. Show that a positive answer will be mutually beneficial.
4. 4 Ask questions to learn important facts. If you have not prepared in advance or probed the ground during the conversation, then it will be much more difficult to convince the interlocutor. If he is not interested in your proposal, then any admonitions will be useless.
   • There is no point in trying to sell a two-seater car to a family of five. Ask the following questions: "For what purpose do you need a car?", "What aspects are important in the first place?" Do not overlook all the needs of the person, and he is more likely to answer you “yes”.
5. 5 Make a minor request first. This technique is also called “foot in the door” and means a petty request that precedes a more serious appeal. The idea is that people are more likely to agree to a big request when they have already agreed to something less significant. For example, if you persuade a child to at least try dinner, then it is very likely that he will continue to eat (especially if you offer a reward!).
6. 6 Use the right moment. The bad mood of the interlocutor is a sure way to get rejected. If possible, do not try to convince the person who is angry or upset about something. The mood should be good. For example, ask for dinner at home or in a restaurant.
   • Of course, this method is not suitable for work situations where you need to sell something to a disgruntled customer. It is not always possible to wait for the right moment. If this is real, then reach out to the person when they are in a good mood to increase their chances of success.
   • Notice non-verbal cues that signal an inappropriate moment: arms crossed, distractions (a phone call or a naughty child), a frown, or an annoyed expression. Even if, out of politeness, the person listens to you, he will not understand the main idea, so it is better to choose a more appropriate moment.

Method 2 of 3: How to Use Persuasion Strategies

1. 1 Peer influence. People often make decisions based on the opinions of others.Before choosing a restaurant or a movie to watch, we read reviews and ask the opinion of friends who have already been to the restaurant or watched the movie. This “herd instinct” will help persuade a person to respond positively.
   • For example, if you are selling a house, then use people's feedback about the area, show potential buyers all the advantages of such a location, and the rating of local schools. Influence through positive reviews from others will speed up the sale.
   • If you want to convince your parents to let you go to study in another country, tell us about all the advantages of the chosen program and provide feedback from students and parents of those children (as well as potential employers!) Who have already returned from school.
2. 2 A convincing argument. If you ask a person for a favor and do not offer anything in return, then a positive outcome is unlikely. Try to use compelling reason to get agreement. It is important that such an argument is truthful and convincing enough, otherwise the person will convict you of a lie, consider you a deceiver and refuse a favor.
   • For example, if you’re queuing for the bathroom and can’t take it anymore, try talking to the person in front of you and asking them to skip the line. If you just say, “I need to go to the toilet. Can I skip the line? " - it is unlikely that you will be allowed in without a good reason. “Could you skip me out of line? An upset stomach won't let you wait ”is likely to be much more effective.
3. 3 The principle of reciprocity. This psychological phenomenon is based on the belief that having received a service from a person, we feel a duty to provide a reciprocal service. For example, if you go on a shift instead of an employee who is sick, then the next time you need not to go to work, you have the right to ask the employee for a favor in return.
   • If so, try saying, “I need to take a day off on Friday. I hope you can come out for me, because I replaced you last weekend. ” Such a debt to you will almost always convince the person to agree.
4. 4 Offer a rare service or opportunity. This approach is often used in advertisements when you are told that “the offer is limited to expiration date” or “the number of items is limited”. Use this trick to convince the person. If you need to sell a product or service, communicate that the offer is limited in order to add value in the eyes of the buyer.

Method 3 of 3: How to Accept Only Positive Answers

1. 1 Reduce the choice to yes. Research shows that the sheer number of options is often confusing. Try to limit the number of possible responses to your request to two.
   • For example, offer your significant other two restaurants to choose from, or ask a friend to choose from two pre-selected dresses. Try to narrow down an overly general question like "where are we going to have dinner tonight?" or "what should I wear?" A limited number of specific answers will allow you to get what you want and make it easier for a person to choose.
2. 2 Agree to negotiations or a partially positive answer. In some cases, there is no way around it without compromise. If you need to convince someone who agrees under certain conditions, then you are on the right track. Accept partial consent as a victory.
   • This approach is especially sensible when talking to an older person or older person (parent or boss). For example, if you want to arrive home later than usual, then you should provide a certain gap for negotiations. If your parents want you to be back by eleven o'clock in the evening, and the party continues until one o'clock in the morning, then allowing you to be home at midnight can be considered a victory. If you ask your boss to raise your salary by 7%, and he agrees only by 4%, then the victory is again yours, because you were able to convince the management of the need to raise the salary.In this case, you managed to get what you wanted (spend longer walks with friends or increase your salary) in a roundabout way.
   • Don't consider compromise to be a negative outcome. Treat it as agreeing to a condition. Thanks to the power of persuasion, the situation is more advantageous than it was before you voiced your request.
3. 3 Ask questions that will definitely lead to positive answers. It is sometimes helpful to ask questions that will answer yes. Instead of trying to convince the person of something, try creating a relaxed atmosphere and a good mood with positive responses. For example, use this strategy on a first date or family meeting if you need to tip the scales in your favor.
   • So, on the first date, you can ask: "The wine is just wonderful, isn't it?" or "Are you crazy about this city too?" At a family dinner, ask: "Does everyone agree that Grandma cooks chicken the best?" Such questions push you towards a positive answer and allow you to find a common language with others.
4. 4 End the conversation with a head start. If you have not been able to fully convince the person, then try to end the meeting or conversation with forward-looking words. Do not back down and take another step towards your goal.
   • For example, if you were trying to sell a set of furniture to a person who said that he needed to consult his wife, then at the end of the conversation, say: “Great. Can you come to us on Thursday with your wife? " Sellers and suppliers who make a living doing it often say “always close the deal”. Proactive work and an offer to meet again is a great way not to agree to a negative answer, but at the same time not to impose and put pressure on a person so that he does not go into defensiveness.

Tips

• Always try to choose the most appropriate moment. If the interlocutor (boss, spouse or parents) is angry or busy with business, then a positive answer is unlikely. Wait until he is in a good mood, if time is not running out. In this case, the chances of success will be higher.