Content

• Steps
• Part 1 of 3: Face the Truth
• Part 2 of 3: Letting go of false hopes
• Part 3 of 3: Move Forward
• Tips
• Warnings

Sometimes you just have to come to terms with the fact that the guy you like doesn't reciprocate. If you have questions: “Why doesn't he call? Why am I not interested in him? ”, Then you know, it's time to move on to looking for another guy. Most likely, you will be unpleasant and painful, but you need to face reality and move on.You deserve to be in a relationship with a person in whose presence you will not have a question about how he treats you.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Face the Truth

1. 1 Stop making excuses for his behavior. If a young man has feelings for you and is open to a relationship, you will feel it. Otherwise, he is either cheating on you, or for some reason is not ready for a relationship. He may not want to tell you the truth.
   • In addition, the young man may have had a sad history of previous relationships. It usually takes time to recover from a breakup. He may not show interest in you for some reason. You should not be tormented in doubts about why he does not call, or do your best to fix the situation.
2. 2 Learn the signs of a one-sided relationship. If you constantly have to reassure yourself that he will change his attitude towards you, you just need to wait a little, most likely your relationship is one-sided. Some say that love grows stronger in separation. However, in a one-sided relationship, the distance separating you from your loved one will induce you to miss him even more, while he will not experience such feelings, and will come and go as he pleases.
   • Look for the following behavioral signs, which will show that one partner has deeper feelings than the other. If one partner is constantly interested in the life / time of the other, invites him on dates, is interested in his personal preferences, then, most likely, such a relationship can be said to be one-sided. In addition, if only one partner invests in a relationship, then this indicates that such a relationship is one-sided. If, for example, when planning the week, he takes into account the interests of his beloved, calls him or initiates a date, and in return does not receive such an attitude, then this indicates that the second partner does not experience deep feelings.
   • If you listen to sad songs on the radio or watch your phone for hours waiting for your lover to call you, then you are probably in a one-sided relationship.
3. 3 Don't try to be who you are not. You should not change yourself if the other person insists on it. Take it very seriously if friends and family you trust tell you that you are changing a lot for the sake of the person you like. If you try your best to be different in order to please your lover, you will not be able to build a healthy relationship. Plus, it's much more enjoyable to be with someone who loves you for who you are.
4. 4 Pay attention to alarms that you ignored. As a rule, actions speak louder than words. When you stop making excuses for his indifference to you, you will realize that you need someone with whom you can build a healthy relationship and who deserves your love. After all, you deserve to be with someone who is looking for every opportunity to be with you. You shouldn't try to build a relationship with someone who has to be persuaded to just call you.
   • If you are not sure about his feelings or you are constantly tormented by doubts related to his attitude towards you, then most likely this relationship does not exist at all.
   • If he tells you he doesn't know what he wants, take his word for it! He doesn't reciprocate with you. You deserve a relationship in which your partner has no doubts about your place in their life.
   • If he calls or offers to meet only on weekends, and during the week you do not hear a word from him, then something is wrong in your relationship. You can convince yourself that he is busy with work or study, but if you face it, things are not so simple.When a guy is really interested in a relationship, he will look for opportunities to connect with you.
   • If he talks a lot about his ex-girlfriend, chances are he still has feelings for her and is therefore not ready for a new relationship with you.
5. 5 Be honest with yourself. The best way to deal with pain is not to lie to yourself. Just accept this fact. Agree that you misunderstand his attitude towards yourself, and therefore your unjustified expectations lead to the fact that you experience pain.
   • Tell yourself that you have invented a love for yourself that does not exist. We often want what we don't have.
   • Note that there are things that you cannot control. You cannot force someone to love you or even change for you. It cannot even be influenced by the strength of your desire. The person himself, first of all, must want this.
6. 6 Admit your feelings. Your feelings are real. Loving someone is a completely normal and healthy feeling that everyone experiences sooner or later. Even if your love is unrequited, acknowledge that you have deep feelings for the person.
   • Talk to a trusted friend or psychologist about this to help you deal with your feelings. You should not suppress feelings just because they make you feel painful.
   • Allow yourself to think about your attitude towards this person. However, try to limit your thoughts to just a few minutes so that they don't become too intrusive.
7. 7 Be kind to yourself. Think positively about yourself. Focus on the positive qualities and activities you enjoy. Indulge in a relaxing day at the spa, go hiking on a warm day, or hang out with a good friend.
   • Create your own personal mantra. Come up with a short, positive phrase to repeat when you feel overwhelmed or need reassurance that everything will be okay. It can be a simple phrase: "Don't hang your nose, open your heart!"
   • Take a few minutes a day to meditate in a quiet place. This is a great opportunity to grow as a person. By being able to cope with unrequited feelings, you will become much stronger.
8. 8 Appreciate yourself. Even if the person you like does not have feelings for you, this does not at all detract from the value and significance of your personality. Remember that the lack of interest of the person you like does not mean that you will not be able to build a relationship in the future with a worthy man. Never let lack of interest in you determine your own worth.
   • Put yourself in his place. If the young man is not a sociopath, then he is unlikely to want to hurt you. Perhaps you yourself have had to tell the person that you have no feelings for him. Remember that next time you may be the person who will not reciprocate to someone who has tender feelings for you.

Part 2 of 3: Letting go of false hopes

1. 1 Control your expectations. If you, after analyzing the situation, understand that your feelings are unrequited, then most likely the time has come for your expectations to correspond to reality. If you keep waiting for him to ask you out, wants you back, or tells you that you are the girl of his dreams, you are in a vicious circle of unfulfilled expectations. This makes you even more frustrated.
   • Tie your expectations to what is in your power and control, such as having lunch with a friend, arriving at school on time, and going out for a walk on a warm day.
   • Start each day on a positive note. Your happiness should not depend on whether you manage to meet your lover. You cannot control his feelings and actions. By learning to manage your expectations, you can experience inner peace.
   • Allow different options. For example, if a young man hasn't called you in the past few days, don't expect him to do so today. By letting go of the expectation, you free yourself from the pain of unfulfilled hope.
2. 2 Avoid magical thinking. Magical thinking is an irrational belief that with the power of our thoughts we can change reality, affect other people, objects or events. This is a natural way of thinking for young children who are not yet able to distinguish their fantasies from reality. When you think that you have met “the only one” or that fate has brought you together, it will be hard for you to part with the idea that sooner or later you will be together and that only you should be next to this person.
   • Take off your rose-colored glasses. Try to see its flaws. The truth is that there are no “perfect” people or relationships. Magical thinking is unhealthy thinking because it contains unrealistic standards that an ordinary person cannot achieve.
   • Stop adhering to unhealthy beliefs and rituals, such as getting up from a certain side of the bed every morning, hoping that this will affect your lover and he will call you. Tell yourself that there is no connection between yours and his actions.
3. 3 Allow yourself to grieve. If, after analyzing the relationship, you come to the conclusion that it is one-sided, it's time to deal with the pain. Don't judge yourself. Chances are, you are very frustrated and angry with yourself because you gave this person your heart without a trace. Remember that you are only human. We all experience feelings, hope for something and feel the need to love and be loved. Forgive yourself, you didn't mean to hurt yourself.
   • Indulge in a hot bath or a new manicure.
   • Talk to your friends and family. Say that you need comfort. Everyone has experienced this in their lives.
   • Go to the movies to watch your favorite movie.
4. 4 Keep calm. It is very difficult to deal with your feelings if you have to see this person often at work or school. Instead of focusing on him and your feelings, help another with their work or improve the quality of your work.
   • Plan your time so that you don't meet this person after work or school. Thanks to this, you will avoid a difficult conversation with him.
   • Be kind if you have to communicate with this person.
5. 5 Delete his contact information. Remove his phone number from your contact list so you won't be tempted to call or text him. Also, remove it from your social media friends list. Thanks to this, you will not take the opportunity to contact him, and also you will not see a photo of his new girlfriend.
   • Delete his voice and text messages. You won't be tempted to listen to or re-read them again.
6. 6 Complete your schedule. Include interesting activities. You should enjoy life. Take up new and interesting art for you. If you love to travel, choose the place you would like to visit.
   • To deal with sadness, don't give yourself time to do it. Make sure your schedule is filled to capacity. Also, spend time with friends and family. You will be able to get the support you need and quickly deal with your feelings.

Part 3 of 3: Move Forward

1. 1 Do not hurry. Unrequited feelings are associated with pain. However, this is a valuable experience that will come in handy in the future. Give yourself plenty of time to recover from what happened. Also, analyze the situation and think about what valuable lessons you learned from what happened. Introspection will help you see the problem that runs through all of your relationships.
   • Stop regretting the past and focus on healing your broken heart.
2. 2 Date other guys. When you hang out with other guys, you are more likely to realize that the young man you liked is not the best option. There are a lot of good guys around you. You will definitely find someone who will be worthy of your love.
   • Before trying to build a relationship with another young person, tell yourself: “I understand what is going on around me. I do not live on illusions. I dealt with my feelings. I understand that my happiness does not depend on whether I have a young man or not. "
3. 3 Heal your heart. You are beautiful just the way you are; you are the most important person in your life. Live so that you are proud of yourself. Don't let the young man determine your worth. Learn to love yourself and become a happy person before loving someone else.
   • Before giving your heart to someone, make sure it is healthy. Maybe you should wait with a new relationship.
   • Regain your self-esteem. Chances are, after the incident, your self-esteem has dropped. Choose activities that will make you feel more confident, such as doing your favorite sport or cooking for your family.
   • Do what makes your life happy and meaningful. Don't forget to spend time alone as well.
   • Be patient. Remember, it takes a long time for the heart to heal. Do not hurry. It will take you a long time to deal with your feelings.
4. 4 Strive for a healthy relationship. It is very important not to transfer the negative experience of the past to new relationships. To make sure you're starting on a positive note, look at your mom and dad's romance or your best friend's relationship with her boyfriend. Ask these people to share tips with you to help you build healthy relationships.
   • Alternatively, you can research the issue online or use the books in the library.
   • Read our article to learn more about how to build a healthy relationship.

Tips

• Do not dwell on this situation, move on. There are many other interesting guys around!
• Let this be a lesson to you, try to analyze everything that happened to you.
• Remember, he is not worth your trouble.

Warnings

• Don't get drunk and don't call him.
• Don't tell everyone and everyone about this situation.
• Don't take revenge or try to harm his new relationship.