Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 5: How to Appreciate Your Body Features
• Method 2 of 5: Avoiding negative thoughts about your body
• Method 3 of 5: How to focus on the positive
• Method 4 of 5: How to Set Goals and Change Your Habits
• Method 5 of 5: Thinking
• Tips

Every day, people see a huge number of unrealistic and potentially harmful images of ideal bodies. Because of this, it becomes difficult for a person to accept, love his body and feel confident, but without this a healthy self-esteem is impossible. You need to know what your body can do and love these opportunities. The philosopher Baruch Spinoza argued that people "do not know the capabilities of the body," meaning that a person does not realize what his body is capable of until he begins to try different things. Psychologists also believe that a person is not aware of all the possibilities. To love your body, it is important to explore all aspects of your body.

Steps

Method 1 of 5: How to Appreciate Your Body Features

1. 1 Think about what gives you pleasure. List your enjoyable moments. Describe everything in detail: who you are with, what you are doing, where you are. Think about what these points have in common. People? Mood? Or just atmosphere (like nature or city)? Once you understand what factors have allowed your body to get the most of it in the past, try to find yourself in these situations as often as possible in the future.
   • Each person's body is unique, which means that you will need to try different things. Scientists have found that many people say they are happy with their current conditions because they do not know what makes them happy. Start by listing the moments that you feel are happy.
2. 2 Think about what you know how to do. Since all bodies are unique, all people are given something better and something worse. If you are a short person, it will be more difficult for you to play basketball, but you can make a good rider. To accept your body, it is important to understand that you are better at certain tasks. It may take some time for you to realize which tasks are right for you.
   • If you don't know what your body is doing better, try doing something you never planned to do. Sign up for yoga or pottery making classes. Go to an impromptu performance. As Spinoza said, it is impossible to understand what the body can do until you try to do something.
3. 3 Think about what you like about your figure and appearance. Even those who do not love their body can find something in themselves that they like. It is important to learn to appreciate all your good qualities, including physical ones. Don't cling to qualities that you don't like. Think about the qualities you love about yourself.
   • Let's say you don't like your hips right now. Perhaps you think they are too fat or too thin. It is important to try to see something good in the situation. For example, you would like your hips to be thinner, but they help you a lot in climbing the mountains. Or you are worried about being too thin, but it is thanks to her that your legs look great in a short skirt.
4. 4 Accept your body as it is. Don't try to change yourself and don't think about qualities that you don't like. Learn to love your body - how you move, how you feel, how you move through space. Forget how your body used to look, especially if it has changed after pregnancy, childbirth, injury or illness. Appreciate your body as it is now.
   • Do not go on a diet unless directed by your doctor. Learn to listen to your body and eat as much as you need. Do not deprive yourself of food and do not scold yourself for the amount of food you eat.

Method 2 of 5: Avoiding negative thoughts about your body

1. 1 Consider how much time you devote to negative thoughts about your body. Negative thoughts will not help you love yourself. Try for a day or two to reflect on how often you think about your appearance. How often do you have negative thoughts about your body? You are more likely to criticize than praise yourself.
   • Try recording the number of negative thoughts in your journal, notebook, or phone. Carry a notebook with you and write down any negative thoughts you have. Pay attention to whether these thoughts were caused by the way you look. In the evening, you will be surprised how often you think negatively about yourself.
2. 2 Replace negative thoughts with positive ones. It can be difficult in the beginning, but it is necessary to do it. Once you realize that you have a negative thought, replace it with a positive one. Try to train yourself to think positively all the time.
   • Start each day with positive thoughts. Remind yourself of these thoughts throughout the day if you start criticizing yourself. For example: "I really love how I feel with this new haircut."
3. 3 Avoid negative media imagery. Avoid TV shows, movies, magazines and blogs that feature unrealistic or negative body images. Remind yourself that most of the photos that are posted in magazines and on the Internet have been processed to meet artificial standards of beauty and sexuality.
   • Psychologists point out that this trend, which has intensified over the past 20 years, provokes the creation of unrealistic ideals and dictates how the body should be. Don't let these images, which have nothing to do with the real world, influence your perception of yourself.
4. 4 Find a therapist who uses CBT. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) techniques allow you to focus on the present and plan for the near future. It is best to work with this method with a therapist, but you can do it yourself. If a negative thought strikes you, stop, take a deep breath, and try to find confirmation of that thought. Has anyone told you that it is in this part of the body that you have imperfections? If so, did the person say this out of spite or was he trying to make a joke?
   • Psychologists believe that if a person has unrealistic expectations of their appearance, their perception of their body is distorted. It's important to keep track of these unrealistic expectations in your thoughts and counter them with rebuttal information.
5. 5 Don't let negative people influence you. It is important not only to strive to be kinder to yourself and remind yourself of your strengths, but also to refuse to communicate with negative people. Are you being criticized by friends and family? Are they telling you that you need to lose weight, change your hairstyle, start dressing differently? If so, you should fight this influence.
   • Remember that you are unlikely to be able to erase close friends and relatives from your life, as you can with magazines and TV shows. But if they are over-criticizing or making fun of you, you will need to talk to them about how their words or behavior hurt you. It should be spoken with respect but firmly.
6. 6 Chat with different people. As you try new activities, start talking to people you don't usually associate with or who you shy away from. Talking to strangers will be scary right away, but gradually it will become easier for you. Even if you find it difficult to start, remember that isolation is even worse. Scientists have found that isolation is as dangerous to health as obesity. Connect with new people, especially if the people with whom you are communicating now do not approve of your appearance or have a destructive influence on you.
   • Scientists have found that who a person falls in love with is determined by chemical processes in the brain. This means that you may not fall in love with the person you always wanted to fall in love with. This also applies to how a person chooses close friends for himself. It's important to surround yourself with people who support you and help you recognize yourself. In other words, it will be easier for you to accept your body and abandon unrealistic ideals if you are supported by people who accept you and your thoughts about yourself.

Method 3 of 5: How to focus on the positive

1. 1 Pay attention to the compliments people give you. Try to focus your attention not on criticism, but on compliments. Remember what it is about you that people praise. Write these praises so that you can reread them when you feel bad.
   • Don't shrug off compliments or tell yourself that people are making them out of courtesy. Accept compliments with gratitude and trust that they are sincere. Consider that people are telling you the truth. Accept the praise.
2. 2 Remind yourself of what you like about yourself. Every time you have a negative thought about your body, remind yourself of what you like about your body. Make a list of at least ten qualities that will not be related to your appearance. Add to the list regularly.
   • This exercise will teach you to value your good qualities. You will understand that the body is just a part of your personality.
3. 3 Change your attitude towards mirrors. If you look in the mirror a lot, promise yourself not to think or say anything negative about yourself. Use a mirror to remind yourself of pleasant things. If you find it difficult to look at yourself in the mirror, take your time. Scientists have found that people who rarely look in the mirror are more likely to focus on their work or relationships, rather than their appearance.
   • Say positive affirmations in front of the mirror. Tell yourself: "You are beautiful!" - or: "You are great!" You may first have to do it through force and you will not believe in what you say, but this technique (this is one of the methods of cognitive-behavioral therapy) will begin to work over time.

Method 4 of 5: How to Set Goals and Change Your Habits

1. 1 Take care of your health and general well-being. You may need to change something in yourself in order to learn to accept yourself. For example, if you have an extra you, you may need to lose weight. But remember that the number on the scale is just one indicator of your health. See your doctor regularly to keep track of all your metrics (weight, blood pressure, blood sugar, cholesterol, and so on). This will give you a complete picture and it will be easier for you to discuss your goals with your doctor.
   • You may need to lose weight or gain weight for health, but you should also strive to improve flexibility, endurance, and muscle strengthening.
2. 2 Set positive goals for yourself. Think not about the negative associated with the goal, but about the positive. For example, if you decide to go in for sports, do not set yourself the goal of losing a certain number of pounds. The goal should be positive, for example, "I play sports so that I can run 3 kilometers without stopping," - or, "I want to walk more to go hiking with my father."
   • The likelihood that you will achieve your goal (both in terms of improving your fitness and in terms of self-acceptance) is higher if you focus on what you would like to become better at.
3. 3 Play sports that you enjoy. Choose exercises that you find interesting and fun. Don't choose exercise just based on the benefits it can give you. Try new activities and keep only the ones you like. For example, if you enjoy yoga, do yoga even if you think you are overweight for this activity.Almost all fitness programs can be adapted for a person of any weight and any degree of fitness.
   • If you are embarrassed to study with other people, sign up for one-to-one classes, take classes with a friend, or study at home. Don't let the fear of judgment from other people influence your decisions.
4. 4 Think about your style. Avoid buying clothes, doing makeup and choosing haircuts based on what is considered appropriate for people of your physique, or what is recommended in fashion magazines. Wear what you want, what you like and what you feel comfortable in. Choose clothing that reflects your personality, is comfortable for you and suits your lifestyle.
   • Try on all sorts of things and experiment with styles. If you are comfortable with things that others think suit people with your body type, wear these things, but only because you like them, not because you should wear them.

Method 5 of 5: Thinking

1. 1 Compare yourself only to yourself. The world would be boring if everyone looked the same. It makes no sense to compare yourself with others - not with celebrities, or with your acquaintances. It's better to compare yourself to yourself in the past, and for that you need to have goals. For example, compare how you look now with how you looked a couple of years ago.
   • Be kind to yourself and take your time. Treat yourself the way you would like others to treat you.
2. 2 Remember that the body is only part of self-esteem. It is important to learn to love and appreciate your body, but you need to remember that your value as a person is not determined only by your appearance.
   • Think about people you admire, love, and respect. What qualities come to mind? Do you value others for their appearance or for the character and personality of a person?
3. 3 Know when to ask for help. Remember that it can be difficult for everyone to come to terms with their body, and that's okay. But you should also consider seeing a doctor or therapist. There are signs of problems with body perception that require a visit to a specialist. Ask yourself the following questions:
   • Can you control negative thoughts about yourself? Do you constantly think about what you consider to be your shortcomings?
   • Does dissatisfaction with your appearance prevent you from leading a normal life? Do you refuse to meet people and speak in front of a large number of people? Are you afraid to go to work out of fear of judgment?
   • Do you spend a lot of time in front of the mirror every day? Do you spend a lot of time looking after yourself?
   • Do you feel like you can't stop comparing yourself to others? Do you try to avoid cameras?
     • Be aware that if you have any of the problems described above, you most likely need professional help. You may have developed a body dysmorphic disorder that requires treatment. If this condition is not addressed, it can lead to the appearance of suicidal thoughts and intentions. Even if you have not been diagnosed with this, you should seek help so as not to deal with the problem alone.
4. 4 Find the right professional. There are several options for help. You can make an appointment with a psychotherapist for individual sessions. You can participate in group therapy or join a support group where the structure will be less rigid. You can also find a support group online and connect with people who are familiar with body image problems.
   • It is important to find people who will not judge your attitude towards yourself. Look for people who can help you with advice.

Tips

• Place stickers on the mirror with a list of the qualities you like about yourself. You can write several qualities related to your appearance (for example, "you have nice cheekbones"), but most of the qualities should be related to your character.
• The support of other people is extremely important because you can benefit from the advice of people you trust. Remember these tips when you have negative thoughts again.
• If you want to go on a diet or exercise, talk to your doctor first. Avoid sudden weight changes.
• All people are different, whatever their figures are. Everyone loves different types of looks. Some people worry about body hair, others don't see anything wrong with it.