Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: How to Build Confidence
• Method 2 of 3: Resolve Your Doubts
• Method 3 of 3: Think Positively

You and your partner were incredibly happy together, until suddenly doubts began to creep in? Probably, thoughts began to creep into my head about whether you really fit together so well. Maybe the partner is interested in someone else? If you don't resolve relationship doubts, they can ruin everything. Deal with your doubts by reaching out to their source - your partner - for the confidence you need.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: How to Build Confidence

1. 1 Share your fears. If you keep your feelings to yourself, doubts will only intensify. Share your feelings by talking to your partner about them. Be sincere, open up and share your concerns.
   • Say something like, "We never talk about the future, and that makes me question your feelings for me."
2. 2 Ask your loved one for support. After sharing your fears, ask your partner to support and reassure you that everything is fine. Let him remind you of how much he loves; you may want a physical manifestation of affection, such as hugging or kissing.
   • You can say something like, “I need to hear that I am the most important to you. Can you tell me about this? "
   • Be careful not to demand too much reassurance, as you may seem intrusive to your partner.
3. 3 Work together to find solutions. Determine what concerns you about your partner's behavior. Then, work together to consider options for how to deal with it.
   • If, for example, you start to doubt because your partner is constantly postponing important conversations about the future, talk frankly about it and find a compromise solution.
   • If doubts arise after an unpleasant quarrel, try signing up to a family counselor and learn how to better resolve conflicts.
   • Talk to each other about how you love giving and receiving love. Some, for example, show their love by doing nice things for their partner, while others prefer to give their partner compliments and declarations of love. Everyone has their own "love language" and this is completely normal. It is important to know how each of you expresses your feelings so that there are no misunderstandings.
4. 4 Prioritize your quality time together. Doubts arise when people spend little time together, let alone romance. With more time for communication and intimacy, doubts will surely fade away.
   • Compare the schedules of each of you and set aside a few days or evenings a week that you can spend alone with each other.
   • Unplug your phones and let others know that this is your time alone with each other so you can have a really good time.
5. 5 Assess your partner's efforts. When your partner is trying to change their behavior to make you feel more confident in your relationship, show your appreciation for their efforts. Express your gratitude for his efforts by saying, “I noticed that you tried to call me back as soon as you could. Thank you, darling".
   • Express gratitude when your partner, without your request, does something to give you confidence in your relationship. For example: “Thank you for warning me when you knew you were running late. By this you let me know that you will come after all and that I am important to you. "

Method 2 of 3: Resolve Your Doubts

1. 1 Reframe situations that are in doubt. Identify which situations tend to aggravate your doubts. Then try to look at them from a different angle.
   • For example, if your doubts grow when your partner doesn't answer your call, rethink the situation: he may be in a meeting or in the shower. A missed call does not necessarily mean that the person is doing something unworthy.
2. 2 Practice thought-stopping when doubts arise. Doubt is likely to interfere with your daily life and take away all your attention and productivity. Say "stop" in your mind! your stormy stream of thoughts and distract yourself with some fun activities.
   • Read a book, start knitting a sweater, or go for a run.
3. 3 Ask yourself if there is evidence to support serious doubts. If you are constantly bothered by some obsessive thought, perhaps your intuition is signaling a "problem" to you. However, before taking any action, look for evidence.
   • Perhaps doubts have increased after you notice that your partner is flirting with someone else. Do you have other examples that caused you anxiety because of your lover's habit of flirting with others?
4. 4 Decide if your doubts will become a stumbling block. Some degree of doubt in a relationship is fine, but if your doubts arise from the constant lying, cheating, manipulation, or insecurity of your partner, this is probably a sign that you need to end the relationship.
   • In a healthy relationship, there is no over-control, deception, infidelity, or abuse.
   • Doubts that have arisen as a result of a partner not sharing your values ​​in life can also become a stumbling block. If the person doesn't respect what's important to you, this relationship is probably not the best option for you.
5. 5 Discuss your doubts with a psychologist or psychotherapist. If you're unsure of what to do next with your relationship doubts, talk to a relationship therapist. It can help you discover what is at the root of your doubts and determine if they are healthy or indicate a specific problem.
   • You can go to the appointment alone first, before bringing your partner with you to the session.
   • Ask a doctor or friends to recommend you a good specialist in your city, or look for reviews on the Internet.

Method 3 of 3: Think Positively

1. 1 Determine your merits outside of this relationship. Make a list of all the reasons for your greatness that have nothing to do with your couple. Perhaps you are very smart, athletic, have a compassionate attitude towards animals, or are excellent cooks.
   • If your sense of self-worth is closely related to the state of your relationship, then you most likely begin to doubt your partner, faced with the most common problems. You can fight this by working on your own self-esteem.
2. 2 Use mindfulness to deal with insecurities. Feelings of fear or insecurity are not very pleasant, but doubts are normal and even beneficial. Start practicing mindfulness to learn how to cope, or at least tolerate, insecurity in your relationships and life.
   • When these feelings arise, note them to yourself, but do not get stuck. Breathe in deeply through your nose and out through your mouth. Don't try to change or act on your thoughts. Just sit and watch them.
   • Practice mindfulness daily - soon you will begin to feel more control in both your life and in your relationship, and you will become less bothered by these disturbing doubts.
3. 3 Stay away from negative or critical people. The opinions of employees, friends, family members often cause us doubts about our own relationships. If the person can only say something negative about your partner or your relationship, take your time to accept their opinion.
   • Sometimes loved ones give us advice out of good intentions, but not without bias and self-interest. Reflect on how you feel around your partner and what you see in their behavior before letting the opinions of others fuel your doubts.
   • Do not take advice or discuss your relationships with people who tend to judge or criticize. It is better to choose an open and unbiased interviewee who can support you.
4. 4 Remove the words "must" and "must" from your vocabulary. If your language about relationships is harsh, you are more prone to insecurity. Removing these words from your vocabulary will make you feel more flexible and open-minded about your mate.
   • If you, for example, think: “He should answer the call whenever I call,” you inadvertently make yourself angry, not considering that your partner may be busy when you call.
   • Don't assume that your girlfriend must be spending the weekend with someone else, simply because she hasn't planned anything with you.