Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: Make the Right Decision
• Method 2 of 3: Break up with your partner
• Method 3 of 3: Move on
• Specialist advice
• Tips
• Warnings

Parting with a loved one is difficult, but with the right approach and great self-confidence, you can calm the storm of emotions. Most importantly, you must be willing to put your health, happiness, and future first. If there is no place for your man in this future, then it's time to leave, despite the remaining feelings.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Make the Right Decision

1. 1 Ask yourself why you want to break up with your loved one. Breakups are always hard. It certainly won't get any easier if you still have feelings for your boyfriend. However, sometimes there is stagnation in the relationship, partners become distant from each other, and it becomes difficult for them to cope with the situation due to the fact that they spend time separately or are at a distance. It's okay to still love the person, but still realize that you need to move on to a new stage in your life. If you're having thoughts of breaking up, ask yourself a few questions about yourself and your relationship. If you answer no to most of the options below, it might be time to move on.
   • Do you only want to break up because of current circumstances, such as a recent quarrel or financial problems? If not, is it a long-term problem?
   • Do you have any doubts about the breakup, or have you made a decision a few weeks ago and are firmly convinced of it?
   • If your partner asked you for a second chance, would you agree to provide one?
   • Do you see yourself next to this guy in six months?
2. 2 List the reasons why you want to break up. It might not be easy, of course, but writing your reasons down on paper will make it easier for you to convince yourself that you need to go through with it. Don't worry about hurting anyone's feelings - this list is for you and you alone. Brainstorm why you want to end the relationship and consider the following options:
   • You cannot give your partner the love they deserve. Perhaps you need to move to another city for a new job, or want to spend more time with your family, or find it difficult to meet their needs. If you really love him, but you know you can't / don't want to be around him, it's time to break the bond between you.
   • You fell in love with another guy. Unfortunately, you cannot order your heart. If you're having serious feelings for another person, it's important to end the relationship with your current man before moving on.
   • You cannot imagine how you will spend the rest of your life with your partner. This is especially important if he includes you in his future plans. Get it over with now instead of hoping you change your mind as it won't.
   • You are unhappy. If the bad times outweigh the good ones and the relationship weighs on you every day, it's time to move on. This is not just another difficult period - this is a relationship that has begun to deteriorate.
3. 3 Review your reasons in a week. Reread your reasons and make sure they are still correct. Did you compose the list in the heat of emotion, or did you remain unconvinced after a week? If you are still confident in your intention to break up, then you made the right choice.
4. 4 Imagine an independent life ahead, not the temporary pain that breakup will bring. Many people put off a breakup for years because they fear the emotional trauma that loneliness will bring. You may realize that you will get better in the long run, but fear of short-term pain stops you. Nevertheless, sometimes it is worth closing your eyes and stepping into the unknown.To make things easier for yourself, remind yourself of a few key things:
   • You won't be alone forever. Loneliness does not mean that you will never meet new love (even if it seems to you that such men no longer exist).
   • Independence will make you stronger. Being alone is hard, but it will force you to develop in unexpected and important directions. You don't need a boyfriend to be strong and happy.
5. 5 Remind yourself why you love your partner to make sure you are making the right decision. This can be one of the hardest things to do, especially if you intend to end a relationship, but you have to weigh the pros and cons. Write down why you love your boyfriend and why you are together, and list some enjoyable moments in your life together. Remember that you will always have these memories, no matter what happens between you. If, after walking the memory path, you are still sure that it is better to end it. then you made the right decision.
   • Remember that it is most likely best to break up, even if you still have feelings for your partner. The main thing is to make sure that the bad outweighs the good.
6. 6 Prioritize your health and happiness. Caring for other people is often another obstacle to a breakup. What will mutual friends think? What will my parents think? How are we going to share things? And, most importantly, how will your partner feel? However, all these worries are nothing compared to your own happiness and emotional well-being. As selfish as it sounds, this is the most reasonable position. If your relationship does not work, you and your partner will continue to take out the dissatisfaction on each other with quarrels and arguments. Perhaps friends and family members will be involved in this, and each of you will begin to weave intrigues and cunning in order to protect any property. If you're ready to end the relationship, all that matters is your decision to break up. The rest of the details will be solved by themselves.
   • Sometimes intuition, whispering that something is wrong, can serve as a perfectly acceptable reason for a breakup. Remember: you are doing this for yourself, not for someone else.
7. 7 Do not delay as soon as you make a decision. Keep in mind: if you do not leave your partner right now, but continue to procrastinate, then the situation you are in may worsen in the future. You will regret not taking any action (though you could) and end up wasting your and your boyfriend's time in meaningless relationships. You may be in pain right now, but once you are done with it, you will be happy you did it. Both of you will be able to move on, but not before you go through the breakup.
   • Remember, it's better to be happy alone than unhappy as a couple.

Method 2 of 3: Break up with your partner

1. 1 Call your boyfriend and ask him to meet you somewhere in a quiet and peaceful place. Be sure to pick a small place where you can talk openly and honestly. Let your partner know that you need to talk about your relationship, but try not to go into details over the phone. This will show you basic politeness by preparing him for the conversation at least a little.
   • Don't leave your boyfriend on a date. Take a separate time to get it over with instead of ruining a potentially happy evening.
2. 2 Move on to the topic of parting as soon as you greet each other. Do not beat around the bush, as this will only aggravate the situation and increase the tension. You may even lose courage and change your mind. Reporting a breakup will take 30 seconds of tension and maximum courage from you. But in the end it's only 30 seconds.
   • Take a deep breath and count to three silently. As soon as you get to zero, break the news.
3. 3 Be direct and unambiguous. If you intend to break up with your boyfriend, make it clear to him about it. Don't make him wonder.and also do not give up hope. Once you've made a decision, it's time to move on. Be sure to let him know that you still love him and would like to remain good friends, but that you can no longer continue this relationship. You can search the Internet for examples of how to start a conversation about parting, but in general, it is enough to speak directly and unequivocally:
   • "I am ready to end our relationship";
   • “It's time for us to meet other people”;
   • "I think we need to break up."
4. 4 Try not to get angry, switch arrows, or shift the blame onto your partner. Parting is so hard, and you should not aggravate it with quarrels and disputes. Even if you have a long list of reasons to break up with your partner, you shouldn't point out all of their flaws and relationship problems. This will only add fuel to the fire and can lead to a quarrel or an argument that will leave an unpleasant residue on everyone's soul (for example: “How dare you say that I did not support you? I always did it!” - or: “This is not mine guilt, because it is you decided to move ”). However, the guy will most likely ask you why you are doing this, and it is best to have a calm, truthful, but non-judgmental response ready.
   • “I realized that we are moving away from each other. We've been developing together for so long, and I appreciate all this time, but now I need to go my own way. "
   • “It seems to me that we do not treat each other with the same respect as before. This is partly my fault. Each of us should move on and find someone who will treat us the way we deserve it. "
5. 5 Stand your ground no matter what your partner says. If he is still in love with you, he may ask for a second chance, come up with a way to save the situation (for example, a temporary break), or try to convince you. But once you make a decision, you have to stick with it. Remember, what the guy is saying now will not change your relationship or the problems that led to the breakup.
   • "I understand, but I think that everyone needs to go their own way."
   • “I don’t want to take a break and stay in limbo. We need to leave. "
6. 6 Leave as soon as you say everything you need to. To soften the blow a little, give him a gentle hug and walk away. Don't linger and wait for his reaction. Don't confuse your emotions. Remember that you will be in pain and that it is impossible to break up with someone easily or ideally. Immediately after the breakup, you will be left with grudges about each other, no matter how long you stay or what you say. The best thing is to leave politely.

Method 3 of 3: Move on

1. 1 Remind yourself of the reasons for the breakup when you miss your partner. Parting isn't easy. However, know that your reasoning is correct and that it’s not you, but him. Reassure yourself that you did the right thing. Even so, you may still feel angry or resentful. The healing process will depend on how much you love your boyfriend, but don't worry - you will soon feel better.
   • Being bored does not change any of your problems, and it is not a reason to reunite. Your more serious problems (the ones that caused you to break up) will not go anywhere when the dust of passion settles.
2. 2 Move away completely for the next period of time. Once you let go of your loved one, it hurts. From time to time, you will miss him, think you made a mistake, and want to hear from him on what to do next. However, resist the urge to write to him, call him, or see him. You can leave everything in the past and put your life together only if you decide to move on. Resist the temptation to talk to your boyfriend and work to sort out your emotions on your own. It will be difficult, but in time you will succeed.
   • Perhaps someday you will be able to become friends, but that will be later.You need to root out your romantic feelings completely, and the only way to do this is by not seeing each other.
   • A good way to start the healing process is to remove from sight all photographs and objects that bring painful memories.
3. 3 Try something new. As painful as the breakup is, it also comes with a sense of freedom. You no longer need to make decisions for two - you can only make them for yourself. You will notice that you suddenly have a lot more free time and that you can now easily attend events and activities that were difficult to coordinate with your partner. Don't waste time trying to recreate the feeling you had in your relationship - pull yourself together and try something new. Enjoy your newfound freedom and explore the world of loners.
   • Do something for yourself. Take some time to take care of yourself a little.
4. 4 Seek support from friends and family. Having a wide social circle will serve as a reminder that you are not alone, even though you are not currently dating anyone. Spend time with other loved ones to heal the inevitable wound in your heart.
   • If you feel like calling or texting an ex-boyfriend, it's best to call a close friend. Briefly share your condition and let them know that you are still struggling with old habits and trying not to chat about your problems.
   • Most people will be happy to help you move on, but that doesn't mean they'll want to hear about your ex-boyfriend all day long. Do not start talking about him, but rather discuss other topics.

Specialist advice

Before breaking up with a guy ...

• Determine if your love is real or too sublime. Take a step back and separate the idea of ​​loving your partner for who they are from the idea of ​​loving them for what they can bring to your life. You must have a mutual desire to make concessions.
• Assess if this relationship has the potential to continue. There are many reasons why relationships don't work out. For example, maybe you lack physical or emotional closeness, or the foundation of a relationship is very fragile, or the two of you don't have common goals. In such cases, it is most likely best to break up.
• Ask yourself if the desire to leave is caused by feelings of dissatisfaction with yourself. If you feel like you need to break up with your partner because your parents or friends don't like him, or because you are often on the road, or do not feel attractive, then you make this decision out of fear and lack of love for yourself. Sometimes you just need to take risks and challenge yourself to try and save the relationship.

Tips

• Trust your feelings. Even if you can't think of a good reason to end the relationship, your emotions will point you on the path to happiness.

Warnings

• If you fear that your partner will be physically abusive, part with him in a public place and tell your friend about your plans.