Content

• Steps
• Method 1 of 3: Connect with the person
• Method 2 of 3: Provide Emotional Support
• Method 3 of 3: Offer Practical Help
• Tips
• Warnings

Perhaps one of your friends or acquaintances has lost a loved one. Most likely, you want to support this person, but often in such a situation it is difficult to find the right words. First, express your sincere condolences. Then provide the necessary emotional support.Listen to the grieving person. It is also important to provide practical assistance. For example, you can help with cooking or cleaning.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Connect with the person

1. 1 Choose the right time to talk. Make sure that you are prepared for it before you move on to interacting with the grieving person. A person who has lost a loved one can be very upset. Also, he might be busy. So ask him if he can make time for you. If possible, talk to the grieving person in private.
   • A person who has lost a loved one can be very sensitive to the attention of others, even after a funeral. Therefore, if you want to offer help, approach your friend or acquaintance when he is alone.
2. 2 Express your sincere condolences. After learning that your friend or acquaintance has a loved one died, try to contact him as soon as possible. You can send a letter by email. However, it is best if you call or meet the person who has lost a loved one in person. You don't have to say too much during such a meeting. Say, "I'm sorry, my condolences." After that, you can say a few kind words about the deceased. Also promise that you will visit the person again soon.
   • If the person who is grieving does not know you personally, first introduce yourself and say that you knew a close relative. Otherwise, the person will feel uncomfortable talking to you. You can say: "My name is Ivan. I worked with Yegor at the same enterprise."
   • If the grieving person is unfriendly to you and tries to end the conversation, don't take it personally. Most likely, he is very depressed and therefore behaves this way.
   • During the first meeting, one should not say that a person should pull himself together and continue to live on. Most likely, the grieving person will not appreciate such words of encouragement. Don't be wordy. Speak clearly and simply.
3. 3 Mention that you are willing to help the person. At the next meeting, you will be able to fulfill your promise by providing the necessary assistance. Be specific about what you can do for the bereaved person. This will help him know what you are ready to do for him, and it will be easier for you to keep your word. Tell me what kind of help you are willing to provide and how long you will need.
   • For example, if you are short on time, invite the grieving person to take the flowers from the funeral to the hospital or donate them to a charity.
4. 4 Accept rejection with understanding. If you offer help, and the grieving person refuses you, then listen to his wishes and leave your offer of help until the next meeting. In any case, don't take it personally. Because the grieving person may be offered help by many, it can be difficult for the person to make the right decision.
   • You might say, "I understand that you are having a hard time making decisions. Let's talk about that next week."
5. 5 Avoid sensitive topics. During the conversation, be very careful about mentioning something funny. If you don't know the person very well, avoid jokes altogether. In addition, the causes of death should not be discussed. Otherwise, the person will treat you like a gossip, rather than a sincere and compassionate person.

Method 2 of 3: Provide Emotional Support

1. 1 Call or email as often as possible. Keep in touch with the grieving person regularly. Be there not only during the funeral, but also after, when the grieving person experiences loneliness and sadness. Mark a few days during the week in your schedule when you can call or text someone who has lost someone.
   • A person who has lost a loved one experiences loneliness, especially when they are alone at home on weekends. Therefore, be a support for him on such days.
   • Maintain a balance between providing emotional support to the person and pestering them with your over-attention. Some people just want to cry alone when they lose loved ones. At the end of one of your conversations, you might say, "Can I call you next week?"
2. 2 Invite the person to stay with him. Some people feel lonely after the death of a loved one. It's hard for them to be at home alone. If you feel like your friend or acquaintance is feeling very sad and lonely, you can suggest living with him for a few days, especially during the funeral arrangements.
   • When inviting a friend to stay with him, tell him that you could do something he likes, like knitting all evening or watching a movie he likes.
3. 3 Let the grieving person talk about the past. Do not be afraid to discuss the life and death of a deceased person with him. For example, you can remember the words of the deceased. In addition, you can mention the memories associated with the deceased. Notice how the grieving person will react to this. Most likely, he will share his memories.
   • You can say: "Do you remember, Inna watched this film so often! We watched it together more than once. I really enjoyed it."
4. 4 Consider the grieving person's feelings. Perhaps the person who has lost a loved one does not want to talk about the deceased. In this case, you can talk about what is interesting for this person. For example, talk about some of the movies you've watched recently. If the grieving person is trying to change the topic of conversation or directly tells you, “I don’t want to talk about this now,” be sure to consider his wishes. Talk about something else.
5. 5 Be quiet with the person who has lost a loved one. You don't have to talk when you are with the grieving person. You can just sit next to him and hug him. If he cries, offer your handkerchief. If you're in a close relationship, hold your friend's hand. Thanks to this, he will not feel lonely.
6. 6 Attend all funeral events. There may be a dinner organized after the funeral, try to attend. Tell your friend that you will be there for him. Provide the help you need.
7. 7 Invite a friend to visit a bereaved help group. If you see that he is having a hard time dealing with his feelings, offer to enlist the support of people who can help him with this. Find out if there is a bereaved support group in your area. You can conduct research using the Internet. Invite a friend to attend meetings with him.
   • Be very careful when inviting a friend to get help from a support group. For example, you might say, “I recently learned that there are special groups of people who gather to talk about their loved ones who have died. I don’t know if you would like to take part in such meetings. do it with you. "

Method 3 of 3: Offer Practical Help

1. 1 Offer to help a friend or acquaintance provide the necessary information to other people. Most likely, a person who has lost a loved one will be very depressed because of what happened, so it will be difficult for him to provide the necessary information related to the death of a loved one. Take on this responsibility if necessary. Be prepared to give any help to the grieving person.
   • In addition, you can help collect the necessary documents. For example, you can help with obtaining a death certificate. Such documents are required in order to close the accounts of the deceased.
   • If the deceased person was famous, then, most likely, many people will call his family. Take responsibility for answering calls.
2. 2 Help organize the funeral. Funerals usually involve many tasks.For example, you can discuss with the family of the deceased about the organization of the funeral. Such questions may relate to the finances and the last wishes of the deceased person. Alternatively, you can take on the responsibility of writing and publishing an obituary. You can also write thank-you notes if needed.
   • On the day of the funeral, you can be invaluable help for the person who has lost a loved one. For example, you can help him resolve issues related to organizing a funeral.
3. 3 Offer your help with the housework. You can offer to help the bereaved person with cooking or cleaning the house. A person who has lost a loved one is likely to be very depressed, and therefore it will be difficult for him to cope with household responsibilities. Prepare something delicious. It is best if you prepare meals that you can freeze so that the grieving person can easily reheat them later. Take care of the cleaning. However, be sure to ask the landlord for permission before starting cleaning the house or apartment.
4. 4 Find out if financial assistance is needed. If the deceased did not leave behind material resources, find out how you can help with this. You may need to use dedicated resources to raise money for the funeral.

Tips

• If you do not know the person who has lost a loved one, send him a card with the words of condolences.

Warnings

• If you notice that the bereaved person is very depressed, suggest that they seek professional help.