Author:
Florence Bailey
Date Of Creation:
28 March 2021
Update Date:
1 July 2024
Content
- Steps
- Method 1 of 3: How to hold back tears
- Method 2 of 3: How to pull yourself together
- Method 3 of 3: How to Resolve Conflict
It’s always unpleasant to cry in front of someone who’s yelling at you. This behavior is not only embarrassing, but it can tarnish your reputation at work, school, or at home. Without a doubt, all people cry from time to time, but in some situations it is simply necessary to hold back the tears. What to do? If the tears just come to your eyes, then use tricks to help you contain your emotions and keep your eyes dry. Also, learn to control yourself in a situation where you have already stopped crying. Strive to find a solution to the conflict in order to protect yourself from similar problems in the future.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: How to hold back tears
1 Squeeze the area of skin between your index finger and thumb. Squeeze the skin tightly between two fingers. Squeeze so that you feel pain, but try not to bruise. This pain should distract you from the urge to cry. - You can also pinch the bridge of your nose. This action will block your tear ducts and prevent you from crying.
2 Take a few deep breaths. In a tense moment, take a few slow and deep breaths. This action will make your body calm down and allow you to distract a little from the screaming opponent. This is often enough to hold back tears. 
3 Turn away. Look not at the screaming person, but to the side. Focus on your desk, your hands, or any object. Try to break eye contact with the abuser in order to pull yourself together. 
4 Take a step back. Move a little away from the screaming opponent: take a couple of steps back or sit in a chair. Take control of your personal space so that you no longer feel helpless and deal with the urge to cry. 
5 Find a reason to leave. If you feel like you can't hold back your tears, find a reason to leave. For example, you might say that you are not feeling well. You can also tell them that you are not in the mood to continue the conversation right now. Go to a quiet, deserted place to calm down and stop crying. - Say, “I'm too excited right now to have a productive conversation. I need a minute to calm down, and then I can continue the conversation. "
- It is usually safest to go to the restroom.
- It is also always helpful to take a walk to get rid of bad thoughts. Physical activity can help you calm down.
Method 2 of 3: How to pull yourself together
1 Stay alone. Get in your car, go to an office, restroom, or other place where no one will disturb you. Pay if necessary. Take your time and let your emotions out so you can feel calm. - If you make an effort to hold back the tears, then for sure you will soon cry again.
2 Tidy up your eyes. Cool under eye skin with cold water to relieve swelling and redness. You can also wrap an ice cube in a napkin. - If you're at home and in no hurry, wrap a bag of frozen beans in a tea towel and place it on your face or cover your eyes with cooled green tea bags.
3 Use eye drops. Eye drops can help get rid of long-lasting redness. One or two drops are enough for each eye. After 10-15 minutes, the eyes will become clear again. - If you cry often, then you do not need to use drops too often. If overused, the redness of the eyes may worsen. Do not use eye drops more than twice a week.
- If you wear contact lenses, get eye drops that are safe.
4 Correct your makeup. Take a couple of minutes and tidy yourself up. Use a tissue to wipe off any stains and smeared makeup. Use foundation or concealer to hide red spots on your face. Adjust your lashes and blush, then make sure you look good again. - If you cry a lot, it's best to carry a cosmetic bag with you for emergencies.
Method 3 of 3: How to Resolve Conflict
1 Let people know that you are easily brought to tears. If you tend to cry constantly, take proactive steps and talk to your boss, coworkers, family and friends. Emphasize that you shouldn't focus on this, and explain how best to respond to your tears. - For example, say: “I can easily burst into tears, so if something happens, you don’t need to worry, for me it’s okay. I will try to control myself, but if I cry, then it will take me a couple of minutes to calm down. "
2 Talk to the person who is yelling at you. When you are in control, ask your opponent to take time for a personal conversation. Discuss the problem and apologize if you did anything wrong. Then explain how you felt about the screaming and ask politely to talk to you more calmly. - Say something like, “I get worried and nervous when someone yells at me, so I couldn't find a solution to my problem. I ask you next time in a similar situation to discuss all issues with me more calmly. "
3 Consider the reason for your tears. How do you feel when someone yells at you? If you can understand the reasons for crying, then it will be much easier to find the right strategy for behavior. - For example, if you are experiencing an adrenaline rush, try squeezing an anti-stress ball to relieve any build-up of tension.
- If screaming makes you feel like a pawn, then remember that your opponent is also a person who is prone to make mistakes. He may not even have the right to yell at you.
- Did you cry often as a child? You may not have been able to get rid of this feature.
4 Come up with other behaviors. Think about what you can do or say if someone yells at you again. Imagine how decisions like these turn out to be effective, and you remain calm. - For example, if your boss often yells, imagine yourself saying, “I'm sorry it upset you so much, I'll try to find a solution. At the same time, I find it difficult to focus on the words when you shout. Please, let's discuss this issue in a calm atmosphere. "
- If this approach does not work and the boss continues to scream, then contact the HR department. Nobody deserves this kind of treatment in the workplace.
5 Find healthy ways to deal with stress. Chronic stress increases the risk of crying in stressful situations. Learn to deal with stress so that you don't cry too often. Create relaxing activities to help you deal with daily stress. - For example, yoga, meditation, talking with a friend, going for a walk in the fresh air, or relaxing music is a good way to deal with stress. Find the right way to relieve stress.
6 See a specialist. If tears affect your relationship or interfere with work and school, then try to see a counselor. A psychologist or psychotherapist will help you understand the reasons and find a solution. 
7 Talk to a friend if you are not ready to see a specialist. Explain the essence of the problem to a loved one in order to openly discuss the situation and be honest with yourself. If a person is not able to share his problem, then it is possible that he is not able to see this problem. True friends will always find the right words, they will be able to listen and comfort you.
