How to communicate with snobs

Video: Film Snob Episode #3 - How to Communicate Through Film References

Content

Steps
Part 1 of 3: Protect Yourself
Part 2 of 3: Winning the Snob
Part 3 of 3: Don't let the snob cling to you
Tips
Warnings

Snobs with a special relationship to wine. Food snobs. Snobs who pride themselves on their taste in literature. Snobs who believe their job, clothing, or outlook is better than yours. Sometimes, nothing pisses me off like talking to people who don't consider you worthy of attention because, in their opinion, your way of life and thinking is worse than yours. If you have to interact with such people, the most important thing is to show confidence in yourself and not let them hurt you. Plus, if you're willing to do a little work, you can prove to the snob that what you think is right isn't so bad. If a person is completely unbearable, there are ways to deal with that as well.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Protect Yourself

1 Don't try to compete with such people. It may seem like the best thing to do is to knock out a wedge with a wedge, but in this case it is not: stopping to the level of these people is the worst thing you can do. If a person you know who you consider to be a snob talks about his luxurious trip to Milan, you shouldn't say that you were there too, or explain why France you like more than Italy. This will only provoke the snob to prove to you that you are wrong and that his life is much better than yours. Just listen to the person and resist the urge to tell him why you think your choice is better, or to show that you, too, have something to brag about.
- While you might want to show off an expensive bag, wine, or painting, it's not worth it. It is impossible to convince a snob that he may be worse than someone, and so you only put yourself in a bad light and turn others against you.
2 Be polite and kind to the snob. You may find that even breathing underwater is easier than showing sympathy for the snob, but you should try. When meeting an arrogant and generally unpleasant person, it is best to simply smile, say hello, and ask how he is doing. The snob will not expect this, because he is not used to people treating him that way. If this does not work, at least you will know that you have tried everything before deciding for yourself that the person is hopeless.
- If the snob acts like you don't exist, you can loudly greet him by name as he walks by. This will take him by surprise, and you will most likely have to suppress a genuine laugh.
3 Be confident in yourself. Don't let the snob tell you that you are worse than him or that you are not good at anything. If you are unsure of your beliefs or doubting yourself, it will only add fuel to the fire and make you feel terrible. If you lack confidence, you pause or speak in a low voice because you're afraid to voice your opinion, the snob will grab onto it and make you hate yourself. Speak in a firm, even voice and back up your thoughts with facts. All of this will prove that you are not afraid to state your opinion.
- It's one thing if you don't understand something, and the snob is trying to teach you, and quite another thing if you talk about what you are sure of. Don't let a snob make you doubt how many matches your favorite team has played if you know the exact answer. But if your snob has been making wine for 10 years and tells you something you didn't know about pinot noir, listen and don't interrupt if that's not your strong point.
4 Don't make fun of the snob's taste. Do you remember not to stoop to his level? Snobs have formal opinions, and they don't like it when someone questions them. If you drop down to their level, they will become even more firm in their opinion and will be annoyed that you disagree with it. Since they are already accustomed to arguing with others, they will be able to fight back and make fun of your tastes with a vengeance, and you don't need to.
- Rather than claiming that the snob tastes terrible, be careful with what you like best. You can say that you have not yet seen the series about Sherlock, but you really like "True Detective". It would be much better than saying that True Detective is the only show you can watch and that everyone knows about it.
5 Talk to the snob about his behavior if you know him well. If you have to spend a lot of time with the snob, or even call him your friend because he has other traits that you like, it is better to discuss this person's behavior with him to see if he can ever change. You shouldn't accuse him of snobbery on the forehead, it is better to say the following mildly: "You know, sometimes you behave as if you think that only you are right, and it hurts me." It will not be easy to say this, but it will help a person change if he wants to.
- If you are afraid to use yourself as an example, say something about the other person. For example: "You offended Masha with your words that she looks cheap. There is no benefit from such comments."
6 Let the snob know that you are not offended by remarks. You should prove to this person that you are indifferent to his words. If he makes fun of you or just behaves in a way that makes you and the people around you feel worthless, just play him up, don't respond, or even roll your eyes if necessary. If a snob wants a fierce controversy about craft beer, just shrug and shut up. You should show that you are happy with who you are and that no one can change that.
- If you feel that you are about to cry, apologize and walk out for a minute, saying that you need to call someone urgently. Don't let anyone see how upset you are.
- Don't waste your time complaining about snobs to other people. They will find out about it, and it will be worse for you.

Part 2 of 3: Winning the Snob

1 Find common interests. The easiest way to defeat a snob is to find something on which you agree. Maybe you were born and raised in the same city. Maybe you both adore Maria Sharapova or love making pasta on your own. When talking to a snob, try to find out if you have anything in common. The snob will begin to see you as a person who shares his interests, and will speak positively about your taste.
- If you find something in common, you can impress the snob with your knowledge.
- If it seems to you that you cannot have common interests, you will have to work hard. Ask a mutual friend to tell you something about this person. The next time you see this person, say the following: "I didn't know you could skate. Do you like hockey?"
2 Don't live up to the snob's expectations. Snobs like to label people so that they believe they are wrong. They may have a certain opinion about you if you come from the provinces, have two higher educations or love yoga. While you don't need to prove anything to them, if you want to be able to communicate with snobs, you need to let them know that you are not the person they think you are. It will take some time, but it will all really be worth it.
- As you get to know each other better, it may turn out that the snob is not what you thought he was.It is quite possible that you thought that this person was a snob because of his arrogant behavior, although in fact he is simply not confident in himself and is afraid of new people.
3 Tell the snob what you like. It can be tricky, but you should still try to get him involved in something that he should like. Suppose that a person believes that they are the best at baking, and you know a place to which they cannot remain indifferent. Or the snob listens exclusively to indie rock, and you have a compilation of great compositions that he will definitely like. Try to convey to the snob the idea that there are many more things in the world worthy of his attention.
- It all depends on the presentation of information. You shouldn't talk about something new as if you think you are the best at it. You can put it like this: "If you like Vampire Weekend, I think you will like this Velvet Underground album."
4 Avoid those that can lead to conflict. There are topics that will be like a red rag to a bull for a snob and should be avoided by all means. Of course, everything depends on the individual: if you are talking to a snob who understands wine, you should not convince him that Napa Chardonnay is the best wine in the world, unless you want to hear a lecture about French winemaking. But if the snob doesn't mind discussing fashion, sports or current events in the world, you can turn the conversation in that direction. Every person, even a snob, has a weak point, so you should discuss the things that are least likely to lead to confrontation.
- If the snob is firmly convinced of the correctness of his point of view, you cannot convince him. Better talk to other people who share your love for The Beatles or yoga.
5 Think about who you are talking to. Of course, there will always be people with whom you will not develop communication. If these people are snobbish, you might want to consider why they are intolerant of certain things. Let's say a snob grew up in a poor area, is distrustful of rich people, and you are a fairly wealthy person. In this case, it is better not to discuss your expensive travels and cars with him. If he is a foodie, you should not invite him to a fast food restaurant. Bypassing topics that may offend or offend this person, you will be able to win their respect.
- Of course, you shouldn't completely change topics just to find common ground with a snob, but you should keep in mind all the prejudices that a person may have if you want to have a pleasant conversation.
6 Don't be a snob yourself. There is nothing worse than being snobbish yourself in return. If you fail to establish communication with the snob, it is better to just leave - you should not try to hurt this person. Do not try to ridicule his tastes, do not condemn whatever he likes, do not show your disdain. None of your entourage will like this, and certainly not to the liking of the snob himself, so you should not start a conflict.

Part 3 of 3: Don't let the snob cling to you

1 Empathize with the snob. If all of your attempts are unsuccessful, look at the situation from the point of view of empathy. You tried to be friendly, tried to change your self-image, even tried to show him a new restaurant, coffee brand or clothing line that he might like, but in return you received only cruelty. In this case, it is best to admit defeat and sympathize with this person. Understand that such a person is not confident in himself, does not know how to live in society and is so eager to prove his case that his life is likely to be lonely and unhappy. Thanks to this understanding, you will feel like a more prudent person and will be glad that you could not find a common language with the snob.
- Doesn't your life become easier just because you can communicate freely with people and not cause unpleasant feelings in them? Think about the difficulties a snob faces in daily interactions with other people. Even if he himself is to blame for this, you will not envy such a life.
2 Make sure that the person is truly a snob and not just someone who has difficulty communicating with others. Very often, insecure people who find it difficult to live in society and build relationships with others are mistaken for snobs. It may seem to you that a person considers it above his dignity to communicate with you, is silent, coldly responds to your friendliness, although in fact he is simply afraid of it. Try to get to know the person better before drawing final conclusions.
- If a snob is friends with people you think are normal and pleasant, it may mean that he is able to be open with only a few. Take this into account.
3 Try to avoid this person. This is another tactic to keep the snob from hurting you. If you know that the snob will come to a small party where you too were going, and his presence will make it unbearable for you, just skip the event. If you know the snob is having lunch in the office kitchen, head to a cafe for lunch. Of course, you should not let him survive you from all the places where you like to be, but if the presence of this person pisses you off, it is best to avoid contact with him as often as possible.
- If you do not want the presence of an unwanted person to influence your plans, consider ways to refuse communication when you both find yourself in the same room. You can pretend that you are busy talking on the phone, actively communicate with other people, or if you are at a party, join another circle of people.
4 Don't let the snob influence your self-image. If you have to spend a lot of time with such a person (for example, in the same company of people or at work), you will need to learn to ignore his comments. No one has the right to tell you what you are worth and make you feel worse than others. You will be worse than others only if you make it your choice, and only you have the right to influence your self-image. If a snob is upsetting you, it's important to remind yourself of all the things that make you feel great.
- Make a list of the qualities you like about yourself and any compliments you've ever heard from people. Just because a person is behaving like a pig does not mean that something is wrong with you. Quite the opposite: most likely, something is wrong with him.
5 Ignore the snob if the need arises. While this is not the best way to solve a problem for an adult, ignore the snob, because his behavior also does not match the behavior of an adult. If you are forced to be with such a person for a long time, but you no longer want to make a good impression, just roll your eyes and refuse to talk. There is no need to pretend that you do not see him - you just have to tell yourself that this person does not matter to you. This will help you avoid verbal attacks and you won't have to waste energy answering him.
- When communicating in a group, do not look the person in the eye or pay attention to him. Listen to what other people are talking about.
6 Think about people you feel good with. If a person with snobbish tendencies pisses you off, think of all the good people you like, who you care about, and whose company you feel good about. Just because someone makes you feel ugly, poor, or stupid does not mean that every word they say is true. Think about people who appreciate you and are good with, and don't let one fool ruin your mood.Spend time with loved ones and it will be much easier for you to enjoy life and appreciate yourself.
- You can laugh at something the snob said with your friends if it makes you feel better. You shouldn't talk too much about this person because it will empower them, but if you want to check if they are as annoying as you are, talk it over with your friends. Friends will be able to convince you that you are beautiful and that you have nothing to worry about.

Tips

Don't ask the snob questions about him. He will talk a lot about himself.
You don't have to be sycophant - just be polite and kind.
Some people seem to be snobbish when in reality they are just shy or absent-minded.
Look at the snob with dislike, do not react to him, walk away and do not turn around.