Content

• Steps

It is sometimes healthy to separate from emotional pain if it is too stressful or overwhelming, if it becomes dangerous (can lead to self-harm, or dangerous drug use), if the time is right. point of failure (when you are at work or at school or in an unsafe place), or if you feel uncomfortable expressing your emotions in your current situation (for example, you are certain individuals that you don't trust to share your feelings with).In a healthy way to separate from strong emotions, it helps if you learn to deal with difficult emotions, take care of yourself and your own needs, and use an emotion-free approach. Successful contact.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Coping with emotions

1. 

   
   
   Discover the causes of your intense emotional response. In order to separate yourself better, be aware of the reason for the strong reaction. There are three reasons why you might be feeling emotional:
   • you are very sensitive
   • situations that are reminiscent of traumatic events in the past
   • you are feeling out of control of a situation, which can provoke anger and frustration.

2. 

   
   
   Understand the difference between a healthy separation and an unhealthy separation. It is natural and normal to sometimes want to be independent from your emotions, especially if the emotion is too painful or too overwhelming to be completely dealt with in the present moment. However, excessive emotional separation from others is associated with psychopathy, where an individual commits crimes against another without remorse. Excessive emotional disconnect can also be a result of traumatic experience.
   • If you want to separate from time to time because of a stressful emotion, then that's perfectly healthy. We may not always be ready to deal with strong emotions. However, if you find yourself constantly avoiding others or becoming emotionally numb (unable to feel emotions), you may endure more serious psychological anxiety.
   • Some of the signs that you may need therapy or treatment include: social isolation, staying away from social activities, extreme fear of rejection, depression or repeated anxiety, difficulty. completing work (school or work assignments), and having frequent social conflicts or fighting with others.

3. 

   
   
   Accept your emotional state. Paradoxically, if we accept that our emotions are normal and valid, we may feel better if we separate from them when we need to rest. Sometimes, we may want to get rid of our emotions because they make us uncomfortable. However, these feelings give us a lot of valuable information about our situation and outlook on life. Similar to physical pain, negative feelings (fear, anger, sadness, anxiety, stress) are the same way your brain warns you that something is wrong.
   • The next time you have an unpleasant emotion, such as anger, tell yourself, “I am angry because _____. This anger gives me lots of useful information about how I respond to a situation and will help me decide how to handle it. Anger is normal ”. The anger itself is not the problem, but the problem is what you do with the anger you are feeling. You can choose to ignore it or extinguish it, but this can result in an even more severe comeback the next time.
   • If you accept your feelings and find a healthy way to handle it, it won't affect you, and you can get rid of it when needed.
   • In the meantime, try shifting your focus and taking deep breaths to trigger your body's calming response. The first step is cognitive processes associated with reducing anxiety, and the second step is an action a person can take to initiate the body's calming response.
   • You can also treat it by taking a nap, doing a project, going for a walk, massaging, taking your pet out to play, drinking tea, listening to music, or even kissing your loved one.

4. 

   Express your feelings in a safe place. Giving yourself the space to understand your emotions in a safe way is essential to being able to become independent when you want to. Set hours each day to discover your emotions.
   • Practice crying alone. Crying in front of those who annoy you often will make them even more mockery of you or continue to upset you. Taking deep breaths and thinking about other things instead of the current situation can prevent you from finally handling the situation and ultimately stop you from crying. However, it is not healthy to keep your sadness in mind. Try to wait until the situation is over and wait for the person to leave the room before crying.

5. 

   Write down your feelings and thoughts.. Similar to keeping yourself from crying, it's not good to keep your anger, confusion, or negative emotions inside. Writing your feelings and thinking down on paper or on a computer will help you process and cope with difficult emotions so that you can be independent when you want to.
   • Write down your feelings in a private journal.
   • To avoid falling into negative thoughts, try identifying different ways of thinking or viewing situations. For example, if you have a negative thought that says, "He's a hateful man!" You can write, "However, ahh I could have had a difficult life and lived like that to deal with anger or sadness". A little empathy can help you deal with difficult people and situations in the long run.

6. 

   Distract yourself. Think or do something else. Don't just ignore that feeling or situation. If you try to stop thinking about something, you may end up thinking about it more. This is known as white-bear phenomenon, where a person tries not to think about something but is actually inclined to figure it out, when objects are in one. requested research is not thinking about white bears; and of course they all think about it. Instead of focusing on avoiding thoughts about what is disappointing you, try to think about something else.
   • Try out some distracting activities like: gardening, playing video games, watching movies, reading newspapers, playing an instrument, drawing pictures, sketching, cooking, or chatting with friends.

7. 

   Be physically active. Walking, cycling or any other heart-healthy activity. Aerobic exercise has been shown to boost the chemical endorphins and will help you to be in a better position to track and change your responses to emotional predators. Exercise can be a distraction or a mind-body combination.
   • Consider some of the following physical activities: hiking, rowing, kayaking, gardening, cleaning, rope skipping, boxing, yoga, Pilates (a weight loss method by combining 1 series of controlled exercises to strengthen muscles and improve health), Zumba dance (combine high-energy burning cardio exercises and lively Latin rhythms create the atmosphere fun), tummy and arm exercises, sit up exercises without arms, exercise, running, and walking.
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Method 2 of 3: Focus on yourself

1. 

   Self-reflection. A healthy way of not being emotionally dependent is to focus on observing yourself as an outsider, taking an objective stance. This is sometimes called the "third eye", where you take an extra perspective of yourself as an outsider.
   • When you are lonely, just keep track of your feelings and thoughts. Ask yourself, “How am I feeling today? What am I thinking about? "
   • You can also continue to observe yourself in social situations. Pay attention to what you say, do, act, and how you express yourself.

2. 

   Recognize yourself. Self-recognition is an important element of learning how to emotionally separate yourself. Acknowledgment also means asserting that what you think or feel is reasonable.
   • You can say positive words to yourself, such as “I feel like this is normal and natural. Even if I don't want to show it, I'm still allowed to feel this way ”.

3. 

   Setting emotional boundaries Creating emotional boundaries is setting your needs first by setting limits on what you will forgive others of. If possible, stop contacting individuals who irritate or disappoint you, such as colleagues or neighbors.
   • Try to set boundaries by directly telling people how you feel, and what you want them to do. For example, if your brother pisses you off, you could say, “I am very angry because you pissed me off. Could you please stop it? " You may also need to identify the consequences of breaking boundaries such as "If you don't stop, I won't continue playing with you." This will allow you to calmly discuss your anger without exploding it.
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Method 3 of 3: Use segregation methods

1. 

   Use the balance between emotion and reason (Wise Mind). According to Dialectic Behavioral Therapy, a striking therapy teaches us to endure pain, that we have emotions and reason. Wise Mind is a combination of both emotional and rational thinking. The key to not being dependent on or detaching yourself from emotional pain for a while is to use Wise Mind - the perfect balance between the mind and the emotions in the brain. Instead of just reacting emotionally, make an effort to think rationally about the situation.
   • Acknowledge your feelings by saying, “Emotions are natural. Even strong feelings pass. I can figure out why I reacted so strongly after I calmed down.
   • Ask yourself, "Will this be a problem in 1 year, 5 years, 10 years? How does it really affect my life?"
   • Ask yourself if your thoughts are facts or fantasies. What is the overview?

2. 

   Maintain emotional separation through mindfulness. Creating an emotional distance can help if you need to sympathize with someone, but don't want to be overwhelmed or influenced by the other person's emotions. Mindfulness can be a powerful method of gaining empathy, including a degree of separation that reduces the likelihood of being overwhelmed by emotions from others.
   • Try eating a piece of food that gets your attention (raisins, candies, apples, etc.). First focus on how it looks, its color and shape. Then notice how it feels in your hand, its texture and temperature. Finally, take the piece of food slowly and consider what it tastes and feels like when you eat it. Really focused on this experience.
   • Mindfulness practice. Try walking for 20 minutes or longer. Just focus on walking, and what's happening all around you. How do you feel about the atmosphere? Is it hot, cold, windy, or quiet? What sound do you hear? Are there birds chirping, people chatting, or the car sirens sounding? What is the feeling when moving the body? What do you see? Trees fluttering in the wind, or animals wandering around?
   • Focus back on the moment instead of getting stuck in your way of thinking and feeling or the personal responses of others. Mindfulness requires concentration in the present moment, awareness of your own reactions, accepting and letting go of traumatic thoughts and feelings, and the view of thinking as ideas instead of real.

3. 

   Deep breath. If you are stressed, your body naturally becomes tense and makes you reel in your thoughts. Take slow, deep breaths to avoid the lack of oxygen, which can make the problem worse.
   • Put yourself in a comfortable position and practice breathing deeply through your nose and out through your mouth. Focus on breathing and feel the body as you inhale and exhale. Make sure you are breathing from the diaphragm; This means you should feel your stomach full and go down as you breathe. It feels like you fill a bubble and release it each time you breathe. Practice like that for at least 5 minutes.

4. 

   Use exercises that keep your mind and body connected: Grounding. Grounding is the perfect treatment for emotional dependence because it involves a special method of separating yourself from emotional pain.
   • Try the following grounding method: count to 100 in mind, count imaginary sheep, count the number of objects in the room, think about the names of all the provinces in the country, and list all the colors you can think of. come. Try anything rational and non-emotional that can pull your mind out of a difficult situation.

5. 

   Maintain a routine. Eventually, your mind will learn to let go of certain things, and you will naturally begin to think about many rational and emotionally independent things. The more you practice, the more you will become detached from your painful feelings. advertisement