Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

Would you like to become more courageous? In fact, not everyone is born brave - you will become brave over time as you face many experiences in your life. Of course, it is okay to practice to make yourself more courageous by following what your heart tells you and not be afraid to challenge yourself with a completely new experience, even if you are very inside. fear. It will take time and be patient with yourself. However, with a positive outlook and a helpful mindset, you will find yourself gradually becoming more brave than you ever imagined.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Accept who you are

1. 

   Admit that you are scared. Courage doesn't mean you never know what fear is - it means that even though you feel scared, you still move forward even when it's the scariest moment in your life. The more you try to get rid of these fearful feelings, the stronger they will become. Instead, bravely acknowledge your current feelings. You will feel better in coping with your emotions when you are honest with them.
   • Speak out your fear. Saying out loud what you're feeling anxious about is one way to acknowledge your fear and make it more normal. You don't have to reveal your fears to others, just telling yourself is enough.
   • You can try journaling. Write down something secret but genuine about your feelings. Avoid self-criticism - it won't help if you say something like, "I'm just a coward". You should focus on your true feelings for a moment without giving any harsh criticism, such as "I'm really scared of the surgery tomorrow".

2. 

   
   
   Accept your fear. Understand that this is completely normal. The human fear response usually originates in the amygdala, a tiny area of ​​the brain known as the "lizard brain". This area creates a different kind of emotion and everyone experiences it. Hence, criticizing yourself for why you are afraid of not making things better, nor making you more courageous.
   • Read a few stories about people who have faced fears and how they overcame them. This will help you realize that you are not alone in being scared and will make it easier for you to accept the emotion.

3. 

   
   
   Identify your fears. Sometimes, we are often not sure what we are afraid of. That uncertainty can make you more restless and in turn make you feel more nervous. Take a moment to figure out what caused this panic.
   • You may find that self-reflection can be very helpful at times. Try to think about things as specific and detailed as possible.
   • For example: “I feel scared. I feel that fear spreading all over my body. It's disgusting. I don't know why right now I feel so scared. This can be because I feel insecure about my partner's health or feel anxious about keeping my current job, or even feel scared when my favorite basketball team is in danger of not winning. to be the champion this season ”.
   • You may feel better after talking with a mental health professional. Many people believe in the myth that healing is only for those who have a big problem they cannot overcome on their own. However, this is completely not true. If you are constantly having trouble coping with your fears, your doctor or counselor can help you figure out why and give you some tips for overcoming this.

4. 

   
   
   Examine your fears. We tend to panic when we feel that something is threatening or hurting them (or others). Some fears are justified, but others can do more harm than good. Acknowledge your fears and determine whether they are positive or negative.
   • For example, being afraid to skydive when you haven't had a class in the subject is considered a valid fear. You have no training or skills in this area and this could injure yourself. However, you can overcome this fear by taking a skydiving course and learning more about them. Of course you will still feel a little scared while on the plane. But you will try to act as if friend can control everything well.
   • On the other hand, you may also feel nervous about completing your own book and be confused as to how people will be judged, and this fear really doesn't help. You can't control the reactions of others, but you can control what friend do. In this case, the only thing that makes you feel hesitant about deciding everything is fear.
   • Fear can manifest as something irreversible, and everyone seems to be afraid of it. Let's take a step back and examine them. For example, the "I don't have the courage to travel alone" mindset shows that your fear is inherent and unchanging. Instead, focus on what you can do to overcome your fear, thinking, for example, “I'm afraid of traveling alone. But I can research where I will explore so that I feel more comfortable going there.Maybe I should take a self-defense class to feel stronger. ”

5. 

   Accept your hurt. A common reason why we feel fear is because we worry about getting hurt. Vulnerability also comes with uncertainty, pain, and danger. However, being hurt also opens doors for you to learn to love, bond, and empathy. Accepting your hurt as a fact of life can help ease your anxiety about the fear you are experiencing.
   • One way to become brave is to accept that everything is risky. Everything you do in a day - from getting out of bed to having dinner - carries different levels of risk. But that doesn't stop you from remaining in this life. And they shouldn't be things that frighten you either.
   • The fear of failure is another very common fear. Don't think of things in terms of failure or success, but rather a direction in which you can learn from them. This way, things can turn out to be useful sometimes, even if they are not what you expected.

6. 

   Focus on everything you can control. You cannot control your fear - because this is an emotional response that you cannot change. However, you can have control over what you do regarding that fear. Focus more on action, not spontaneous reactions.
   • Remember, you cannot manage the consequences of any action. You can only manage what you do. So stop thinking right away that you “have to” control how each action you do will result - you simply can't do it. Focus on your actions, not their results.
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Part 2 of 3: Build self-confidence

1. 

   Find yourself a good example to learn from. If you are going through a hard time figuring out how to get out of your current situation, try imitating someone who's facing an unlucky situation to see how they overcame them. Not only does this give you a bright perspective ("Wow, at least my problem isn't that bad"), but it also gives you extra motivation to become more brave.
   • Search around for a role model among people you know. If possible, you can ask them how they courageously overcame the difficult situation.
   • Read more about some brave historical figures. Learn more about the stories of some famous people who bravely face unhappiness in life, such as Theodore Roosevelt, Harriet Tubman or Joan of Arc, freedom fighter, daring man up against evil, and so on.

2. 

   Fostering resilient will. Courage means that you have to become "tough" when faced with difficult or terrible circumstances. Even so, resilience requires you to be harder and more determined. In order to become truly resilient in the true sense, you need to practice the following:
   • Flexibility. Cognitive flexibility is the ability to adapt to change in circumstances. It is also the ability to resist an overly defensive attitude when something goes wrong, and the ability to find new ways to approach a problem or situation. You can develop flexibility by recognizing the potential for learning in all circumstances, and by enhancing the kind of thinking that is more curious than it is in fear.
   • Dare to challenge yourself. To be courageous in a situation, you must confront it directly. In fact, brave people look at the situation carefully and determine how to approach it, rather than trying to run away or ignore the problem they are facing. Breaking down a situation into many different sub-factors can help you deal with them more easily. You can also imagine the best possible scenario, rather than some dark one.
   • Perseverance. Things don't always go as well as it should be. The brave people understand this and accept to take a step back when they stumble. You can help become more resilient by determining what action you should take every step of the way. It's easier to deal with obstacles if you know that the next step you are going to take is quite possible, rather than doing some big and lofty task.

3. 

   Challenge negative thinking. We often get stuck in useless thinking or "cognitive distortions," from time to time. When you find yourself thinking negatively about yourself or a difficult situation, challenge yourself to see what evidence you have that way of thinking, or correct yourself. leave them in a positive direction.
   • Generalizing things is a common cognitive distortion. For example, the way of thinking, "I am just a coward" is seen as a general expression of my condition, and this is completely incorrect. You can experience fear, but that doesn't mean they turn you into "a coward."
   • Refocus on what you are feeling at a certain moment. For example: "I feel worried about an important date tomorrow because I'm afraid that person won't like me." This can help you avoid always sticking to false or inaccurate beliefs about yourself.
   • Aggravating the problem is another cognitive distortion that can trigger the fear response. When you make things important, you make events or experiences disproportionate until they get out of control. For example: “The lady didn't even look at me when I passed her in the hall. Maybe she's mad at me? Maybe I did something wrong? Oh no, she'll fire her job. I will be unemployed and lose my house. " This is of course the worst-case scenario, but it seems unlikely that it will happen.
   • Challenge the above thinking by asking yourself to check for any evidence that you are going through each stage of your assumption. For example: “The lady didn't even look at me when I passed her in the hall. Maybe she's mad at me? But it is also possible that she is distracted by everything around her, and that is why she does not see herself. Assuming she was angry at me, this wouldn't make any sense. I will ask her again. If everything is fine and she doesn't get angry at me, I'll go back and blame her.

4. 

   Refuse perfectionism. Perfectionism is the culprit behind many of your fears. We often fear that our efforts will not yield "perfect" results if we do not do our best. People often have the illusion that perfectionism is a healthy ambition, or a motive for excellence. In fact, perfectionism is holding us back from experiencing loss or failure - and that's not possible in this life.
   • Perfectionism can be the cause of being harsh to yourself. This means that sometimes you will see all your accomplishments as "failures" because they don't follow your unrealistic standards. For example, a perfectionist might consider scoring an eight in history as a "failure" because this is not a perfect score. However, if a student is fair and impartial to herself, this is a success for her, because she really did her best in class. Just focusing on what you're doing rather than the end result will help you beat perfectionism.
   • Perfectionism often leads to self-shame because it only focuses on your shortcomings.It can be difficult to show courage if you are feeling ashamed of yourself.
   • More than that, perfectionism often does not lead you to the path of success. In fact, the individual is seen as an ordinary perfectionist little are more successful than those who experience failures and see them as learning experiences.

5. 

   Start each day with a self-affirmation. Self-affirmation involves the collection of certain phrases or mantras that are personally meaningful to you. You can repeat them to show kindness and appreciation for yourself. While it may sound a bit cheesy, it really helps to increase your confidence over time.
   • For example, you could say something like "I accept who I am from today" or "I deserve to be loved".
   • You can also focus on self-affirmation in terms of courage. For example, you could say "I can be courageous today" or "I am strong enough to cope with whatever difficulties I will face today."
   • Remember, this self-affirmation should focus on yourself. And the important thing here is that you cannot manage others. For example, statements for self-affirmation can be helpful such as: “I will work hard to control my own fears today. I can't do anything but give it my best. I cannot manage how others act or react to me ”.
   • Express your assertiveness in a positive way. People tend to react negatively to negative statements, even if they have a positive connotation. Instead of saying, "I won't let fear overwhelm me today," say something like, "I can face my fear because I'm a strong person."

6. 

   Separate yourself from fear. Sometimes, it's better to see fear as something separate from you. Visualizing your fears as an isolated creature can make it easier to control them.
   • For example, imagine that your fear is like a small turtle. Every time a tortoise feels frightened, it will indent its head in its shell. Right now, it can't do or see anything and this obviously doesn't help. Visualize your "fear as that of a turtle" and control it by reassuring yourself that you are doing what you can control and that you have nothing to worry about about what you cannot do.
   • Using funny or funny images can make some of the power of fear disappear by making it funny or amusing. (Looks like the spell in the story Harry Potter Can you help me? Riddikulus!)

7. 

   Seek the help of friends around. Sometimes, a single word of encouragement from a friend or loved one is enough to help you out whenever you feel nervous. Make connections with those who know how to accept their hurt and are trying to be brave, rather than the individual who thinks so that he or she may be dominated by fear.
   • Humans are more susceptible to "being contagious." That means, just like you are susceptible to colds, you can also easily "catch" emotions from people around. It's important to bond with someone who accepts themselves and is courageous in nature. If you spend most of the time with the fearful individual (and not even doing anything to overcome the fear), chances are you will have a harder time overcoming the fear. your own.

8. 

   Make an effort to complete difficult tasks. Being successful in some challenging areas can help you boost your self-confidence. Even if you don't understand the task you are taking on right away, take this challenge as a learning experience and remind yourself that you can spend as much time as you can to learn more.
   • For example, you might aim to learn the guitar, cook French food professionally, or get certified in water diving - and the only limitation is your imagination.
   • Set goals and work to overcome challenges that are personally meaningful to you. A surefire way to challenge your confidence is to constantly compare yourself to others. Don't worry what others will think of your goal; do them separately instead friend.

9. 

   Practice mindfulness. One reason many people often struggle with being brave is that we often run away from feelings of sadness, anger, or frustration, and from there we "ignore" all our pain. and others are tasting it. Training your mind to accept your present experience without any criticism can help you get used to both negative and positive emotions. From there, you can feel more courageous.
   • Mindfulness meditation can be seen as a great way to practice the above skill. You can take a meditation class or practice it yourself.
   • The University of California at Los Angeles (UCLA) often offers a wide variety of downloadable meditation instruction files. The University of California at San Diego (UCSD) also offers a variety of downloadable meditation instruction files in MP3 format. Harvard Pilgrim's "Mind the Moment" can also provide you with a free course and mindfulness food video.
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Part 3 of 3: Train daily courage

1. 

   Learn to accept uncertainty. Uncertainty is often seen as the source of many fears. However, you can completely learn to overcome this situation by gradually adapting to it in your everyday experience. This will increase your confidence and ability to deal with ambiguity, so you will easily do everything with your own courage.
   • "The state of not tolerating anything that is not clear" is often the cause of unease. It will be difficult for you to accept something negative happening in a certain situation. Sometimes, you may even overestimate the dangerous nature of things or even refuse to act because you are worried about the end result.
   • Make it a habit to journal throughout the day, and note times when you feel confused, anxious, or scared. Write down in detail about what caused the emotion. Also, don't forget to take note of how you react to the feeling.
   • Hierarchy of your fears. Put on the scale the things you fear in 0-10 levels. For example, the fear of “dating a stranger” could be level 8, while the thrill of “going to see a movie you've never seen before” might be. in degree 2.
   • Start slowly to learn how to manage your fear of uncertainty by practicing under certain low levels of fear. For example, you could choose one of the low-level fears, like “try a meal at a new restaurant,” and practice. You may hate this restaurant after you practice, and that's fine. The key here is to demonstrate to yourself that you can cope with uncertainty with courage and that in turn will become stronger.
   • Record your reactions in a journal. Every time you face your fear, don't forget to write down what happened. What did you do at that time? What does that action look like? How did you react to that fear? And how did that feel?

2. 

   Make specific plans. It is easier to get nervous if you don't know what to do. Break down challenges and difficulties into small tasks that you can complete.
   • Visualizing the obstacles you might encounter will help you act bravely in times of difficulty. Think about any obstacles you might face and plan your action to overcome them.
   • Paraphrase your plans and goals in positive language. Many studies have shown that there is a high chance that you will achieve your goals if you compose them in a positive direction, meaning what you do will. forward, but not backward.
   • Implement goals based on target performance. Remember, you can only control actions and reactions your, not someone else's. Make sure you set your goals and plans within reach friend can be done.

3. 

   Helping others. When you are nervous or stressed, the natural tendency is to hide yourself from the world. However, psychological research shows that this is not a good way to increase courage. Many people exhibit a "caring-and-friendly" tendency, which means you will respond to stress by showing concern for others. This tendency to care can trigger an emotional state in your brain, and then translate into practical action in your face on a difficult problem. If you feel scared at some point, don't forget to show others how much compassion you are for you or highlight their strengths. You can also find your own strengths.
   • When the social care system - regulated by the neurotransmitter oxytocin - is stimulated, you will experience strong empathy and attachment to others. This system also helps to inhibit the area of ​​the brain that generates fear.
   • This rewarding system in the brain also produces a neurotransmitter called dopamine, which increases feelings of motivation and reduces the feeling of fear at the same time. Dopamine can also make you feel more optimistic and courageous.
   • The harmonization system in the brain depends on the neurotransmitter serotonin. Your intuition and self-control are also linked to this serotonin, and that means you'll feel more motivated to make bold (and intelligent) decisions.

4. 

   Be brave in 20 seconds. Sometimes, it is hard to imagine being brave for the whole day, or even just an hour. Ideally, you should be brave for only 20 seconds. You can do it anything with just 20 seconds. When you have finished the first 20 seconds, start with the 20 second interval. And the next 20 seconds. And the next 20 seconds. This time span will be added up.

5. 

   Consider your decision. If you are facing a situation where you need to make a bold but difficult decision, take time to reconsider. If you feel motivated by something that needs to be done, you can use a rethinking strategy to increase your courage. Persuasion is also an important factor in courage. Ask yourself:
   • Is this the right thing to do? The right thing here is not necessarily the easiest thing to do, nor is it the most common. You should do what your conscience tells you to make a decision.
   • Is this the only way to solve the problem? Reconsider whether there is another way to get your problem going. Is there a solution you haven't thought of?
   • Have you been mentally prepared to receive the results? If the action you take can have a huge impact, it's better to spend more time thinking about it. In the event that the worst-case scenario happens, will you be able to handle everything all right?
   • Why did you make this decision? Why is it so important to you? What if you don't make that decision?
   • You can also create a list that covers what you gain and lose for each action you take. What's the worst that could happen? And what's the best that can happen to you?

6. 

   Don't think - take action. After a certain level, it's better to stop thinking about what you're going to do, and instead do it instead. Thinking too much not only prevents you from taking decisive action, but also affects you, leading to stress and feeling like you. can not do something out of spirit Take a deep breath, try to relax your mind, and move forward with what you've decided. Don't hesitate, instead focus on how you get through them.
   • It helps a lot if you repeat your assertion as you take the action. Confidence plays a key role in getting through the first step. Once you move on, you will feel more courageous.

7. 

   Pretend until you've overcome your fear. Learning to accept feelings of uncertainty and reassurance about certain circumstances is one way to gain learning experience. You can't be brave overnight. However, many studies show that pretending to "show courage," even if you feel very anxious, can help you become more brave.
   • Don't wait until you "feel" brave. Usually, even the people we think are brave - like firefighters, warriors, doctors - feel fear in some cases. However, they know what to accomplish, and they choose to do it.
   • On the contrary, believing you can not Doing something sometimes turns out to be a self-pleasing prediction. Trust in yourself can either help or interfere with your actions.
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Advice

• Courage doesn't always show off. Sometimes, courage is just the strength to get you up and try again.
• Remember, courage is not the lack of fear, it is the strength to deal with that fear.
• When you need to muster up your courage, remember the arduous challenge you went through. Everyone becomes brave at one point (learning to ride a bicycle, for example). And you can be brave again.
• Find a poem or song that inspires you. They should help you feel like you're not alone. Write this poem or song on paper and take it with you. However, it would be better if you could keep them in mind! Every time you go through a long day, don't forget to sing the song or recite / recite the poem!
• In success there is not necessarily no failure, but it is important to overcome that failure.
• Do what you think is right. It's the most important thing and will make others think that you are brave. For example, stand up for someone who is being bullied.

Warning

• There is a line between courage and stupidity. No matter how brave you are, don't risk what you think is unnecessary.