Author:
John Stephens
Date Of Creation:
2 January 2021
Update Date:
1 July 2024
Content
Domestic violence, or sometimes called “violence,” is a form of physical, sexual, or psychological violence used by one party to show power and control over the other person in a relationship. relationship. Domestic violence can happen in both homosexual and heterosexual relationships.Victims of domestic violence are usually women, but men can also experience violence. Over time, relationship violence often deteriorates. In Vietnam, 58% of women have been victims of domestic violence. If you are concerned that a friend or relative is the victim of domestic violence, you can spot the warning signs through this article.
If you need urgent help, you can call (04) 3775 9339, the domestic violence hotline or call emergency services like 113.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Recognize the signs of physical violence
Understand that domestic violence cycles and escalates. Abusive relationships do not always start with physical violence. The relationship can be quite "perfect" at first, even "unbelievably good." All forms of domestic violence get worse over time. The good early stages often cause the survivors of abuse to stay in the relationship for longer because they believe they can make the other person behave as well as before.- Physical violence in a relationship often happens cyclically. There are times when the abuser becomes kind and even behaves well to the other person, but then stress can escalate and violence occurs. The abuser then proceeded to make a messy apology, promising to change, or limit the severity of the violence. Next will be a period of calm, but violence can happen again.
- Physical violence rarely happens in isolation. Emotional abuse, sexual abuse, abuse and other forms of violence are used to control victims. Abusers can even convince victims that the violence is self-acquired.
Look for signs of bruising and injury. Injuries from physical violence are often the same as when a victim is strangled, kicked, or fell. Common injuries include bruises, dark eyes, and marks on the neck.- Victims of domestic violence often cover bruises with clothing or cosmetics. If you are concerned about your loved one, be aware of the unusual way in which they move. These people often have difficulty moving due to painful bruises and trauma.
- Victims often lie about the cause of the injury, such as being "clumsy." The cause of the injury could be more serious than what they said.
Recognize other forms of physical violence. Physical violence does not mean simply strangling, hitting, or kicking. Other realities of physical violence include:- Refuse or restrict access to food or sleeping space
- Destroying belongings or personal belongings
- Restrict or disallow the victim to seek medical attention
- Get the victim out of the house or car
- Leave the victim alone or in a strange or dangerous place
- Control contraceptive use and other medications
- Unilaterally decide pregnancy or abortion
Method 2 of 3: Recognize signs of emotional violence
Notice how the abuser talks. Domestic violence doesn't stop at physical violence. Emotional violence is often not apparent, but it still has negative effects. Here are some examples of emotional abuse to look out for:
- Insults or intentional ridicule. This can happen in public, because abusers often do not think they are doing something wrong. A common form of verbal insult is to tell the other person to be "stupid," "crazy," or "ugly." The abuser may constantly abuse the victim or talk about private or embarrassing things in a public place to make the victim feel uncomfortable.
- Screaming. This is a warning sign, especially if the action is out of control or is violent.
- Continuous criticism. Abusers are always "looking at" small things. This person may criticize the victim's appearance, weight, clothing, spending habits, preferences, etc.
- Extreme possession. Abusers are often jealous and extreme in control. At first their words can be quite “romantic”, such as “I / I can't live without ______” or “______ is everything to me.” These people have no sense of limitations and consider themselves the only one in the victim's life.
- Ignore or underestimate your partner. The abuser dominates every aspect of the relationship. They do not listen to the partner's advice, opinions, or needs, instead underestimate them, or become angry if the other person wants to voice an opinion.
Look for signs of intimidation. The abuser often threatens the victim to take control of the other person. These threats often make it impossible for the victim to give up because he is held accountable to the abuser's actions. An abuser can:
- Confiscation, destruction, or threat of destruction of victim's property
- Threaten to harm pets
- Threats to hurt or kill yourself
- Threats to harm or kill the victim
- Threats to harm or kill your children
Note the social life of the victim. People who are abused are often not allowed to have friends or meet colleagues. If they interact with other people, the abuser often asks for constant "phone calls" or limited contact.- The abuser usually refuses to let his partner go to school or work. Frequent unexcused absences can be a sign of domestic violence.
- It is often difficult for victims of violence to leave their homes. They cannot or are not allowed to use transportation.
- Victims are often paranoid, worried that they will upset the other party by doing something. They may also be overly friendly or even flirtatious, especially those in power.
Watch for other warning signs. Victims of domestic violence do not have access to money or technology. Below are signs of violence:- Victims must always report to the other person about any expenses, even allowances.
- Victims often have extreme financial worries, especially what the abuser is referring to.
- The victim cannot possess a debit or credit card.
- The victim did not have his own phone. Or, the abuser request victims use their phones to reply to text messages or to take their phone calls.
- Victims are often very cautious when using email messages and social media accounts. Abusers can track these accounts. Victims are only allowed to use a "joint" account with the other party.
Pay attention to how the victim talks. Victims of domestic violence often feel held accountable for their behavior. They often make excuses for the other party. This person insisted that only they "understood" or "changed" the abuser.- When mentioning, the victim would say something like "But he didn't hit me" or "I deserve what I got."
- Victims may experience depression or anxiety. They also behave strangely, such as becoming reserved when their nature is very open
- Victims often blame themselves for problems at work or school. The abuser repeatedly asserted that the violence was the victim's fault.
Method 3 of 3: Offer to help
Exchange in a safe place. If you are concerned about your loved one's condition, find a safe place to talk to them. Your concern should not be brought up in front of the abuser. This can make the victim more vulnerable to danger.
- Be honest about your concerns. Bear in mind that this can be a rather intimidating topic of discussion, so be patient if the victim doesn't want to talk about it, or deny the original truth.
Assistance does not make judgment. You may be thinking, "Why didn't you give up on this abusive relationship?" However, for many people this is not a simple problem. The victim may even be preoccupied with his children, genuinely in love with the other person, and hope that the abuser can change. You should not criticize the victim's decision or speak as if you have "the whole answer."
- Trust the victim. Don't underestimate or take them lightly if they tell you about the violence they are experiencing. Sayings like, "Oh, that doesn't sound that bad" or "Sounds like something ____ is going to work."
- Remind the victim that violence is not their fault.
- Respect the feelings of a loved one. One of the negative aspects of domestic violence is the effect on the victim's self-esteem. The abuser repeatedly blames the victim that they are incapable or intelligent to do something on their own, and the victim can believe that it is the right thing to do. They believe that treating the other person's actions as "crazy" violence. They may experience depression, confusion, fear, or overwhelming. You should respect the victim's feelings and confirm that they are normal.
Discuss safety plans with the victim. The National Center for Domestic and Sexual Violence Prevention provides PDF forms to help victims of domestic violence draw up a safety plan. You can help them develop this plan.
- The abuser can monitor internet usage and a partner's computer at home. You can ask the victim to use your computer to print the application form, or to take them to the public library.
- Print a copy of the plan for your records. If your loved one needs it, you can help.
- Create a password. Most abusers often track the victim's phone or other device. Please agree on a code to indicate that the victim is in danger.
Always be with the victim. If they decide to leave an abusive relationship, there are a variety of sources you can offer to help you. Victims of domestic violence often have no money or safe shelter, meaning they stay with the abuser due to lack of support.
- Find the name and phone number of your local domestic violence center.
- Offer to provide money or phone using a prepaid subscription to the victim. Keep important documents, such as passports and birth certificates, at home with you.
Avoid putting pressure on loved ones. You may feel angry when you watch someone you love fall into abuse. Remember that they have to decide for themselves to leave their current relationship. Do not overwhelm the victim or act judgmental if they do not make a decision. advertisement
Warning
- Violence is never "okay." Call emergency services if you are experiencing violence or witness a loved one being abused. Don't delay until it's too late.
