Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

Recently, your spouse, children, parents, friends, or a loved one committed suicide. Your world is turned upside down. Losing a loved one is a huge pain. Knowing that someone you love chooses to end your life can add to your hardship. Time can help you overcome your pain and adapt to loss. In the meantime, you can learn skills that can help you understand your emotions and care for yourself during these tragic times.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Get Ready for an Emotional Response

1. 

   You may be shocked. When you first learn that your loved one has committed suicide, paralysis is a fairly common feeling for your loved one and friends. You will want to say things like "I don't believe it!" because you don't think this is true. Over time, this emotion will fade away as you begin to accept the person's death.

   

   
   

   Crisis Text Line

   Crisis Text Line 24/7 Crisis Advisory Service provides 24/7 crisis resolution by SMS. People in crisis can text 741741 to connect with a Crisis Advisor. They have sent more than 100 million messages to crisis people across the US and the service is growing rapidly.

   

   Crisis Text Line
   24/7 Crisis Advisory Service

   Seek help if you have symptoms of post-traumatic stress. "Losing someone you care deeply about would be extremely difficult, if you experience flashbacks or other traumatic symptoms after a loved one," says Crisis Text Line consultant. If you die, talk to someone you trust. You can reach out to a family member to talk about what's going on and ask them to connect you with a mental health professional. Things that calmed you down when you had to go through flashbacks. "

   
   

2. 

   Understand that it's okay to feel confused. Confusion is another type of emotion that often occurs in someone who has lost a loved one. You and the other person will ask "why" this happened or "why" your loved one doesn't show any signs.
   • The need to understand death will constantly haunt you. Trying to look back at what your loved one has done over the past weeks, days, or hours can help you better understand the problem. However, you need to accept that suicide will always contain questions that you cannot answer.

3. 

   
   
   Be prepared to accept feelings of anger, guilt, and blame. You may find that you are angry at your loved one's suicide. This is probably because you blamed yourself for not paying attention to signs that your loved one is suffering. You can also blame God, other family members, a mental health professional for not doing his best, or blame the deceased for not opening up to ask for help.
   • Know that it is common to blame yourself or feel guilty, but this is not your fault. Blaming can help you cope with loss by assigning responsibility to others when you are in fact suffering because you understand that you have no control over your life and that of someone you love.

4. 

   Deal with the feelings of rejection or abandonment you feel. When your loved one commits suicide, you might think you're not good enough. You find that if your relationship with the person is "strong enough," they won't choose to end their life. You are upset because the person leaves you alone to deal with this heartbreaking pain.
   • It is normal to feel abandoned or rejected. But remember, suicide is a very complex challenge for the victim and for the people they leave behind. Understand that this is the person's choice because they cannot cope with life or a particular situation - not because of you.
   advertisement

Method 2 of 3: Coping with Grief

1. 

   Reach out to other loved ones. After you learn that someone you love committed suicide, you may want to separate yourself from friends and loved ones. Others may make you feel guilty and blame you more. Remember, they are just suffering from the death of a loved one like you. Instead of isolating yourself, spend more time with someone who also loves the deceased. This method will give you the comfort you need.

   Tips: Everyone will mourn your loved one differently, so your friends and loved ones may have a different experience than yours. Respect their own grief and ask them to respect you as well.

2. 

   Remember a beautiful memory. As people gather to comfort each other, take time to recall the good days you had with the person who died. Immersing yourself in suicidal questions and questions (although fully understandable) will not help you find peace.
   • Retelling a happy memory will help you get back to a time when the person was once happy. And you should remember that person this way.

3. 

   Follow your habits. As soon as possible, try to get back to your usual routine. Initially, this can be quite challenging. Even getting dressed or cleaning the house becomes a difficult activity. Sure, things won't be as "normal" as before, but re-establishing your routine will help you become more conscious of your purpose and structure in life.

4. 

   Eat healthy and exercise. When you are grieving over the death of a loved one, it is easier to skip meals. Taking care of yourself will be the last thing that comes to mind. However, eating a balanced diet every day will keep you healthy to overcome difficulties. Exercise - even if it's just by walking the dog around the property - can help reduce sadness or anxiety and improve your mood.
   • As you develop a routine, include eating and exercising so that you can properly nourish your body during this stressful period.

5. 

   Practice calming yourself. All the painful thoughts and feelings associated with a loved one's suicide can make you sad, anxious and even depressed. Do something that relaxes you and helps ease your emotions and energize you.
   • Soothing activities can include anything soothing, such as burying in warm blankets, drinking hot tea, taking a hot bath, burning scented candles, playing soft music, sitting in front of the fireplace, or reading a good book.
   • If you are young and find it difficult to express yourself and relieve stress in these ways, you can draw about your feelings in a coloring book for expressing emotions or draw pictures by hand.

6. 

   Don't feel bad about having fun. Attending social events can help you stop thinking about your grief, and remind you that no matter how hard things are now, your life will gradually get better. .
   • Stopping focusing on your emotions for a short period of time will not lower the severity of the problem you are experiencing. Instead, hanging out with friends, watching a funny movie, or dancing to music you shared with your deceased is a great way to restore your grief coping ability.
   • You may find yourself rolling around and then in tears. This is also completely normal.

7. 

   Seek expert help if needed. You can gain a better understanding of what the deceased was going through by seeing a grieving counselor. A therapist can explain the confusing mental health problems your loved one has to deal with. They will help you process your emotions and develop healthy coping skills. This is especially helpful if you watch the person commit suicide because this traumatic challenge can develop into post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD.
   • Consult with your doctor to find a professional dedicated to dealing with grief after suicide.
   advertisement

Method 3 of 3: Conquer Stigma

1. 

   Learn statistics about suicide. Educating yourself, your loved one, and the people around you will help you better understand why the person you love chooses to end his life. In the US, more than 40,000 people commit suicide each year. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the country, and the 2nd leading cause of death among 10-24 year olds. In Vietnam, suicide is the second leading cause of death among young people (behind the group of causes due to traffic accidents).
   • Doing research on the underlying reasons for this will help you better understand what your loved one is going through, and may help save others' lives in the future.

2. 

   Grief should not be suppressed. Suicide often makes living people feel isolated, unlike other causes of death. Stigma is formed in their surroundings so they don't want to talk about what they're going through, and you may even keep the details of death quiet to avoid the stigma.
   • Talking to friends and loved ones about your thoughts and feelings is essential for healing. You need to be courageous and find someone with whom you can share your story.
   • You don't have to tell everyone in your community, but be open to a few people you can count on for their support. Keeping quiet about this issue can prevent people from learning about the signs and prevent chances of saving someone else's life.

3. 

   Join a support group for people affected by suicide. Seeking support from those around you, who are also coping with a loved one's loss of suicide, can provide comfort and help you overcome discrimination.
   • You can join a support group organized by counselors or laypeople who have had to deal with the grief of suicide. Check out a few support groups in your area to see if you feel comfortable opening up and sharing your story.
   • If you cannot find the local group of people who have lost loved ones by suicide, you can search online.
   advertisement

Advice

• Despite the varied controversy over the issue, many think that keeping yourself busy will help you get through the grief. While you shouldn't hide your emotions by immersing yourself in your work, staying active can help keep you away from depression and negative thoughts.
• Seek out a grief center or group of counselors if you are going through a difficult time and can't talk to anyone. This method will also help you get a brighter look that the suicidal's friends and family are not able to give you.

Warning

• You may feel that you want to start implementing bad habits (such as biting your nails, smoking cigarettes, using drugs, drinking alcohol) during a period of grief. Perhaps you have had these habits in the past and you are thinking about returning to them. Get help right away! The best place to start is with your doctor or local community service, as there are plenty of programs out there that can help.
• Any persistent thought of death - your or someone else's death - needs to be reported.
• Any persistent depression should be reported to a doctor immediately.
• If you want to commit suicide, go to a hospital in your area, which has trained professionals to help you.