Content

• Steps

Feeling insecure is one of the main problems affecting human relationships and even more importantly, in the relationships we create with ourselves. Feeling unsafe, whether alone or with another person, can lead to self-destruction when there is no coping strategy. When we feel insecure, we cannot express and show our best abilities, and we do not dare to face the usual daily risks that bring us many exciting experiences and new opportunities. Feeling more reassured helps yourself begin to make a profound change. Courage and perseverance are two essential qualities, worthy of a priceless gift for us to trust ourselves and the world we live in.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: Eliminating Feeling Uneasy through Inner Criticism

1. 

   
   
   Begin to learn inner criticism. Inner criticism is the lingering voice or mindset in your mind, often taking advantage of every opportunity that can make you feel worse in the face of even the smallest of mistakes, failures and flaws. . Take time to really listen to your inner criticisms and criticisms. Sometimes, we are so attentive about suppressing the negative inner voice that we fail to hear exactly what that voice is saying.

2. 

   
   
   Understand inner criticism. Try to listen to criticism that comes from within you in a variety of situations, and pay attention to the topics and similarities that emerge in the comments. Combining specific face, personality, or voice with inner criticism will help you to listen more deeply and understand the heart of the message that inner criticism wants to convey.
   • This can be difficult for some when they cannot clearly envision an object or role corresponding to inner criticism. This may be a sign that inner criticism is not an object to please, but that it is your own unmet aspirations and values.

3. 

   
   
   Make friends with inner criticism. Making friends doesn't mean you accept everything that inner criticism says. Your friends are someone you feel comfortable around with and they will love you, no matter how you change. Accept the presence of inner criticism and be willing to acknowledge and face everything that your mind wants to convey. Inner criticism can express an important need that has yet to be met, albeit in a distorted way.
   • For example, if your inner criticism is that you are useless, you might view this because your true desire to be appreciated has yet to be fulfilled. This turns feelings of helplessness into a new task to achieve the desire to feel valued, simply asking the person you love to make an affirmation. deserve it.

4. 

   Let your inner criticism know when it's time to leave you alone. As with all honest relationships, it's important to recognize when we should heed warning and counter signals. Once you have developed a positive thought about what inner criticism is focusing on, you may decide to challenge your inner criticism as well as the negative things they bring to life.
   • Give decision thoroughly to change your inner criticism to make things different. You are sending out a clear signal to a part of yourself that is considered useless and often criticized.
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Part 2 of 3: Behavior Change

1. 

   Stand up straight. Improving your posture is one of the best ways to get rid of a sense of discomfort (although it seems indirect). By standing and sitting upright, your body communicates with your mind that you are capable and ready for action.
   • Likewise, you should pay attention to what you are wearing. Even if you work from home or in a comfortable environment, consider changing your usual way of dressing to clothes that you enjoy wearing all day.

2. 

   Develop a regular and easy morning routine. Morning can be a more stressful time than any other time, especially if you have work to do. This is the time when we begin to become aware of all the work we have to do, and this leaves us feeling scared and insecure about our inability to get things done during the day. By forming a routine in the morning, we can allay unsettled thinking by consistently calculating things, such as making morning coffee after we step out of the bathroom.

3. 

   Shift your focus from criticism to praise. Do you ever find yourself paying attention to the critical side and ignoring all praise for your job? Living in a society where everyone has to fix mistakes, all problems, instead of the positives, tend to pull us back with a strong pull. Fortunately, friend Have discretion in choosing your assessment focus, level, and preference.
   • For example, if your supervisor says to you, "You have done an excellent job recently, but I want to see the documents that you are working on are arranged in a different way", you can react now. (1) with gratitude for acknowledging the effort, (2) with a comment about something you enjoy the job, (3) And after that in response to a request from a superiors to readjust the job which was already done well. By emphasizing the importance of compliments you receive, you will see how others can positively contribute to your feelings of peace of mind.
     • Notice the important difference between the compliment and the problem, when compared to the standard response of an apology and the promise to change the way it fits.

4. 

   Strengthen competencies in selected areas. Do you have any skills or abilities that will always admire others? Take the time to learn some things you think are worthwhile. Quick reading skills? Milk latte? Play the piano? Cultivating your abilities will help you feel more secure because it will promote your innate talent and nurture certain skills you want to share with the world.
   • Remember to focus only on what really matters to you. You may find this skill or ability valuable because you tend to adore the people who can do it. This thought can help you get rid of the insecurities as you realize this was Skills you feel are very valuable. Otherwise, feeling insecure about choice will make you wonder, "Should I learn this skill?", Will dissipate the confidence you are gaining from practicing this skill. .

5. 

   Rearrange the desk. With the work tool within reach, you can eliminate even the slightest moment of insecurity, when there is nothing you need at hand. A moment of insecurity can intensify and haunt your big decision and attitude. Because the desk is your thing reallyis controllable, so knowing that things like staples and staplers are lying on the top left corner of the drawer will give you a sense of order and freedom in doing everyday tasks.
   • This as well as some of the other successes of day-to-day management (e.g., cleaning the booth clean, keeping up with news, etc.), all can and should considered small success. To become more aware of this success, you should make a list of obvious things to do. Go ahead and praise yourself for any small win on the list by being kind to yourself no matter if you're happy with it or not!

6. 

   Choose your living environment wisely. Be around people who make you feel comfortable creating and discovering yourself, finding out how insecure you feel, and everything. Because you have to take responsibility for your own insecurities, it is important to take a stance towards all social situations. This means being assertive about all of your needs and even staying away from people who don't know how to help or compassionate.
   • Honestly ask yourself, “Who made me so upset by being with them? Who made me feel that my contribution was mediocre? " You may be surprised (and shuddered) to realize that the people we love most exhibit a tendency to be humble and suppress our true feelings. It is normal to fear that our feelings of stress and necessities will not be accepted, even if everyone has these feelings and needs!

7. 

   Express your requests and suggestions. Becoming more reassuring means that you need to learn to believe that someone is listening and will not ignore you. By making legitimate requests and suggestions, others will feel your own contribution and point of view without feeling that you are asking for it.
   • Let's say you're talking to your lover about what to eat for dinner, and you're feeling too exhausted to make it yourself. Instead of complaining that they don't do as many chores as you, or any kind of argument about who "should" have to do it, try revealing your fatigue. You can express this feeling bluntly by making an earnest and non-threatening request that they should take on this mission tonight.
     • Remember not to blame your partner or allude to guilt, as this will put the other person in a defensive and objectionable position. People often react poorly when they feel they are being driven to do things rather than acting their way.

8. 

   Accept and apply a conscious outlook on flexibility in social situations. People who want to feel more secure often experience strong hope to please others, and this often leads to the risk of self-abandonment and decreased feelings of security. However, the same impulse to comply with the request of others will make you stubbornly want to experience something beyond your comfort zone. Experiencing a variety of social situations will show that you are more competent than you think you are. It also gives you a valuable experience of real security in life — yourself.
   • It sounds a bit weird, but how is it related to your feeling of peace of mind how to continue to please people? The difference lies in perception. For example, if you are invited by a friend to a new club that sounds terrible, you might decide to join because you feel insecure about your status in the eyes of your friends. However, you can easily see this impulsiveness as a new way of seeing flexibility, giving you another reminder that you are capable of handling new things. Having a sense of when you should please others and when to use the opportunity to experience new things will promote a sense of security as you take action.
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Part 3 of 3: Psychological Changes

1. 

   Remind yourself of the invisible of feeling insecure. In some social contexts, do you have the feeling that people may somehow see that you are having thoughts of fear or anxiety? Luckily, no one has access to your thoughts, except yourself. You can rest assured that you judge your harshest judgment on your own and chances are that everyone around you will be interested in making a good impression.
   • This opinion seems to coincide with the fact that when faced with difficulty, you will be responsible for all standards created by you for yourself. Only your own views are intimately linked to your sense of feelings, but right or wrong based on someone else's standards will never create that link.

2. 

   Visualize a moment in which you are extremely confident. Try to elicit as much vivid detail as possible around a moment where passion and motivation give you a steadfast confidence. Imagination can activate the ability to enter a state of mind to see your strengths, as well as the opportunities in terms of conditions that support them.
   • In addition to envisioning a confident ego, you should also think about your ideal role. By thinking of the ideal role that can support and challenge you, things will become easier to visualize and understand the whole motive's thinking.

3. 

   Feel free to put your emotional side aside. When you are truly conscious of your problems and failures in your life, it's important to keep an emotional distance to prevent yourself from feeling overly anxious. An inability to see through a problem can create a real sense of insecurity, and this can also cause a chain of insecurity that takes up all of your time focusing on other issues. .
   • Realize that emotional separation can be an effective way to take a new look at yourself and your situation, only if you find the problem with your own feelings. The most helpful thing is to have an inclusive, emotional, and appropriate way of life. As a result, aloofness will be most effective against those whose feelings they tend to react first.

4. 

   Train yourself to recognize the positive aspects of failure and insecurity. One person's throw-away can be a treasure to another. Instead of trying to deny or change your flaws, make an effort to discover what they can do for you.
   • Remember, these are not always obvious and can involve some creative guesswork. For example, if you don't have the job you wanted to do, focus on the fact that you now have a chance to find another, longer, better job. If you are concerned about how weird you look while running, then think that someone will view your running as the cutest thing.
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