Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

Maybe you've been dating someone for a while, or you've just started dating that person. No matter what, your ex wants to have sex with you, but right now, you don't want to go this far. You also don't want to make the person sad or feel rejected. Some steps can help you let them know that you are not ready, and learning some real data in advance will make the process easier.

Steps

Part 1 of 4: Deciding to wait

1. 

   When you choose to have sex depends on what you want. First, you need to understand that this is a personal decision. You have the right to choose when, where, how, and with whom you want to have sex. If you do decide to have a relationship, you should identify and analyze your reasons. Remember not to try to please others regardless of whether you are comfortable with your decision or not.
   • Respect your own needs and ask the other person to respect it as well.
   • Having sex is a decision you both need to make together.

2. 

   
   
   Don't allow pressure from the people around you to influence your decisions. No matter what your social group or media message says, if you want to wait before having sex, you should trust your feelings. Knowing yourself well will give you confidence and the ability to stand firm against pressure from others. Although they will tell you that it is okay to have sex, don't trust them. Your body belongs to you, not them, so it's your decision-maker, not the people around you.
   • Some tips for resisting pressure from everyone around you include spending time with like-minded friends when discussing sex, and always remembering to have a backup plan when faced with a situation. you feel the pressure.

3. 

   
   
   Realize that being "ready" revolves around a period of time you consider having sex. Being "ready" isn't just the first time you have sex in your life, and it's not the first time you do it with a particular person. It is an active decision, and it is always your decision. Never forget that you can change your mind when you want.

4. 

   
   
   Think slowly about when to have sex. Make sure you are ready. Be patient, and don't put pressure on yourself. Having sex is a big deal, and doing it in a hurry without thinking it through or simply to please others will make you regret it later. You should believe that sex will happen at a time just right for it.

Part 2 of 4: Prepare for the conversation

1. 

   Determine why you still don't want to have sex. Write down your reasons on a piece of paper and practice talking about them in front of the mirror, with your friends, or with yourself. Then, when the person you love asks a question, you'll have an answer ready. Here are a few reasons you should include:
   • Avoid getting pregnant.
   • For religious reasons.
   • Going against personal beliefs.
   • Make sure to report legality.
   • Prevention of STIs (sexually transmitted infections).
   • Need more emotional connection.
   • Want to own a close relationship.
   • Make sure that you are both pursuing a monogamous relationship.
   • Know that neither of them have an STI.
   • Need to build trust and certainty.
   • It feels like this is not the right time for you.
   • Don't want to have sex with others.

2. 

   Practice giving a few responses to what your loved one has to say to force you to have sex. If your ex gives a reason why you should have sex, be sure to have a response. Your ex's words can be quite convincing, so be sure to remember your reasons. Remember that their reason is manipulative and needs to be dealt with in a similar way.
   • If he says "If I love you, I will do this". A good response to this would be "If I love you, I wouldn't want you to have to do something you're not ready to do."
   • If he says, "Everyone's doing it," respond with "I'm part of some special person, and I don't want to have sex".
   • Learn a common saying people use to try to convince another person to have sex. You should be prepared to answer them.

3. 

   Be aware that simply not wanting to have sex is also a good reason. Are in the menstrual cycle. You are the one to make the final decision in the relationship. Don't step back on the defensive with your decision. You don't have to have a good reason not to have sex, just as you don't have to have a reason not to want ice cream.

Part 3 of 4: Let the person know you are not ready

1. 

   Explain that you don't want sex, why, and your boundaries. This way, the person you love will understand your boundaries and the reasons you choose to do so. If you are physically close and feel like things are going too far, say something like, "It's going too fast. We should slow down. I'm not ready for this."
   • If you are both together but not physically close, you can say, "I love being with you. You see, we don't have to have sex for the time to be together. so special. I'm not ready to have sex, and I like things like this. "
   • If you're talking on the phone, you can say, "I don't want to have sex right now. I'm not ready. I don't have to have sex with you to show that I care about you. Sex isn't the best. Necessary means rejecting any other close act. There are still ways to show your concern. "

2. 

   Express your feelings and desires to your partner. This way, the person you love won't make guesses about why you don't want to have sex. Good communication fosters intimacy and emotional security. You need to be open and honest with your significant other unless this puts you in danger. If you don't feel comfortable talking to your partner about sex, this is a clear sign that you shouldn't be engaging in this behavior.
   • Let the person you love know what you want and don't want. This method will help them know how you want to be close.
   • While there are many reasons why you might not want to have sex, such as fear of becoming pregnant or not wanting to betray your moral and / or religious beliefs, don't underestimate the saying "I'm not ready yet. sieve ".

3. 

   Evaluate his responses to get a better understanding of your relationship. Listen to what he says because you will better understand who he is, how he feels and what his motives are. Wait until the conversation is over to start thinking about what the person is saying. You will have more time to process your feelings about the matter.

4. 

   Determine what kind of response you are willing to accept from the other side. People who truly respect you will also respect your boundaries of sexuality as well as other interests. However, if you are unable to accept the type of response you love, you may need to rethink your relationship and perhaps leave him. Sex is powerful, but it doesn't have to be emotionally intimate. The foundation of emotional attachment is trust, respect, and good communication.
   • If the person responds positively and respects what you want and don't want, this is a good sign. You are on your way to building a healthy relationship with that person.
   • On the other hand, if he is disrespectful, tries to manipulate you, or if he is constantly pressuring you for sex, this is a sign that he is interested in satisfying his needs. is more intimate than engaging in a healthy, balanced relationship.
   • You need to learn more about what you should look for in your partner.
   • At the same time, you also need to know the definition of a healthy relationship.

5. 

   Separate yourself from the situation if you feel unsafe. Don't allow the other person to push you, bully, or manipulate you. If you feel as though the other person will violate your boundaries or harm you in some way, get out of the situation and get to safety right away. Trust your instincts. If you feel insecure with the person you love, here are some tips for you:
   • You should only meet him in public.
   • Make sure you are not being followed.
   • Ask a friend or relative you trust for help.
   • Have a safety plan.

Part 4 of 4: Maintaining safety and happiness in a relationship

1. 

   Understand what creates a healthy and unhealthy relationship. A healthy relationship will respect the boundaries of both. Your loved one will listen to you without criticizing it, and he will support you. On the other hand, forcing you to have sex will be a sign of an abusive relationship.Your ex will tell you what to do without considering how you feel. You should consult more about the warning signs of violence so you can determine if you are in an unsafe or violent situation.

2. 

   Practice setting healthy boundaries in all areas, not just sex. Intimacy comes from respect, and respect comes from respecting each other's boundaries whether you agree with them or not. Remember that you are always the one to decide what you want to share with the person you love. Only maintain a relationship in which your boundaries are respected, and make sure you are in a relationship with both of your consent.
   • There are so many other people around the world that respect your needs and boundaries with which you can establish an intimate relationship with them. These are relationships that are worthy of nurturing.

3. 

   Break up safely. If you are concerned that the person you love will be angry, violent, or violent, consider breaking up with that person over the phone, email, or text message. This may seem rather insensitive, but this is the only measure in a situation where violence can occur. Your safety should be a top priority. If you talk to him in person, make sure you do this in public.

4. 

   Don't rush, and wait until you feel ready to have sex. There are many ways to get close to someone, and sex is just one of them. Sex can wait and proceed at a time that suits you. Celebrate your choice of waiting, enjoy the activity you choose, and know well that it is you who decide when you want to have sex.

Advice

• This measure also applies to men, not just women. A woman also has the ability to force a man to have sex when he is not ready. Do not hesitate to stand up for yourself.

Warning

• Trust your intuition. If you feel scared or uncomfortable with someone, stay away from them and find ways to keep yourself safe.
• Doesn't mean no. If your partner doesn't understand this, stay away from them.
• Understand that compulsion is when someone forces you to have sex whether you are in a relationship or are just dating for the first time. If you have been raped, you will need to go to the emergency room right away for care. You can also phone 113 or other sexual assault aides in the area.