Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

Helping others change bad behavior is a good thing, but also very difficult. Sometimes they don't want the help you need, even if you really need it, or your relationship will be damaged. If a friend or relative spends too much time watching porn and neglects relationships, neglects work and study, doesn't care about important issues in life despite the bad news. Bad results happen, that's when you have to step in to help them. By stimulating their actions, shaping new ways of thinking and pursuing a healthy lifestyle, you can help them deal with porn addiction.

Steps

Method 1 of 3: Arousing Action

1. 

   Talk about the difficulty of provoking the action. People with a habit of watching perverse movies often try to hide their behavior. The speaking process allows them to free themselves from lying to keep it a secret. Talking is an especially effective method used in many psychotherapy therapies.
   • If they claim to be addicted, you have to let them tell their story, and listen to what they say.
   • If you notice that they have changed their behavior, elicit the story by saying, “I noticed you often go online, you seem to be busy with something. Can I hear anything? "
   • Don't be afraid to ask straight and honest questions. Dealing with a difficult topic that can ruin a relationship can be challenging. Fraud is the cause that cannot cure your habit of watching porn, so you have to be honest. You need to ask honest and straightforward questions like, "Do you think you are addicted to watching porn?".

2. 

   
   
   Be a responsible person. People tend to try to overcome challenges when they know someone else is interested in the results. If you can tell others about your accomplishments, then you have a tendency to believe in yourself and your personal abilities. Responsibility increases the efficiency and results of action. You should play the role of someone who needs to be kept up-to-date, show interest in the person's success, and will meet with them if they cannot achieve the desired results. This makes them continue to closely follow the process of quitting the unhealthy behaviors.
   • You need to arouse a sense of responsibility in them by saying, "I want to help you with this issue, so I will often ask about your situation."
   • Suggestions are monitoring their computer usage by checking their search history every day or week. You must ask them to commit not to deleting their search history.

3. 

   
   
   Avoid feelings of shame and guilt. In most cultures, porn addiction has always brought shame to addicts. If the person is trying to change his or her behavior, shame and guilt over this bad habit won't help the quitting process. You must help them find other jobs that motivate positive change, instead of mocking their negative behavior.
   • Encourage thinking to distinguish right from wrong when necessary. To do this you explain to them that their behavior and themselves need to be viewed separately. They are not bad people, but these behaviors are causing harm so they need to be changed.
   • If addiction is affecting their relationships badly, you should say, “Your social life will change a lot if you change your behavior. Everything will be easier, although it seems a bit difficult at first.
   • On the contrary, the following expression implies shame and guilt: “Don't you want to stop messing with your relationships? I don't understand why you keep doing that. It doesn't make any sense and it hurts others ”.

4. 

   
   
   Help them build self-monitoring systems. Ending an old behavior means learning new behaviors. The goal of the pornographic addiction process is to find other ways to manage and cope with negative emotions. An organized approach is always an effective way to change behavior.
   • Identify behavior that needs change. Through discussion find out the behaviors that the person wants to change. For example, if he stays up until 3am watching sex movies and leaves school or work the next morning, the object to be changed is sleep time. The goal is: Go to bed before 11:30 every night.
   • Help addicts choose / design a monitoring system for behavior change. That means you have to set a time limit to use the computer, schedule outdoor activities, spend an hour a day writing emotional diary.
   • If they are depressed, anxious, stressed or are self-deprecating then show them relaxation techniques such as yoga, meditation and breathing exercises that have been shown to be effective in treating depression.
   • Choose ways that encourage positive thinking and behavior. If they like going to the movies or going to the stadium to watch soccer, they can use it as a reward if they meet the goal set out during the day or week. This improves their self-esteem as well as their beliefs.
   • Reduce intervention gradually when there are signs of improvement. As the time for addicts to show more positive behaviors, you can limit your intervention.

5. 

   Encourage physical activity. Create healthy activities that will keep them away from a computer. The goal is to make them more physically active and interested in the health benefits of physical activity. The stronger they feel, the more motivated they are to maintain that positive lifestyle to continue making changes.
   • You can suggest activities like walking, jogging, hiking, and weight training, which help your brain release endorphins, which increase euphoria and pain relief.
   • You can also suggest joining a dance class. To learn new dances requires intense attention from the practitioner so there is definitely an opportunity for them not to think about pornography.

6. 

   Find a new hobby. Any addiction takes up most of the victim's time and pushes them away from hobbies. It robs them of the opportunity to experience things they might enjoy if they have time to participate.
   • Encourage them to find their interests by answering the following questions: What have you lost in your life? Where do you want to travel if you have the chance? If money is not a problem, what would you choose to be?
   • If they've played the guitar in the past, suggest joining an online class or joining a playing club.
   • Encourage them to join a group with similar interests (not porn), this is the place to bring them close friends. If they spend most of their time in new activities, they will have almost no chance to watch porn.

7. 

   Recommend to join therapy. If their efforts are having a hard time and their self-help strategies are not working, then you should seek advice from a therapist. Many times they are facing anxiety, depression and self-esteem problems, too much to handle themselves.A therapist who specializes in dealing with such problems is helpful in this case, their goal is to provide a safe place for the patient to talk about his or her feelings, discuss a medical condition. open and honest way.
   • Emphasize to let them know that it takes courage to make positive changes in your life, and the therapist will be the one to confirm your words.
   • Letting them see a therapist is the next step in the treatment process. You are already there to listen to what they have to say, but now is the time to see a specialist. You need to let them know: "I'm still there when you need it, and you need to talk to the expert because they certainly have a better way to help you."
   • Find a suitable therapist. You should ask a doctor, family member or close friend to refer a therapist. Find a specialist in your area who can provide treatment for addiction.
   • Find a therapist who knows about cognitive behavioral therapy. Often used for detoxification, it's a step-by-step process designed to help stop compulsive behavior. Experts will help the patient learn and eliminate the negative thoughts that are deeply rooted.
   • You can ask the person to join a 12-step program designed for people with sex addiction. This program is offered worldwide, you must contact your local unit for meeting information near where you live.

8. 

   Organize intervention. You can help in many different ways, and sometimes a more focused approach is needed. Intervention means planning for friends and family to meet with the addict to work on the addiction. This is a very difficult but necessary decision because the addiction is out of control and the addict's life is in danger. Often, people are addicted to it and refuse to cooperate with it. Though the intervention might be too much for them to bear, the purpose was not to push them on the defensive.
   • Therefore, you must consider selecting members to participate in the intervention. Loved ones can describe to the addict about the negative effects that porn addiction can have.
   • You need to plan in detail to create treatment options for the patient. For example, there are many inpatient and outpatient treatment programs and all of them offer treatment counseling.
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Method 2 of 3: Shaping a New Thought

1. 

   Emotional support. If the person has opened up to you about your addiction, focus on providing support instead of behaving negatively towards them. It can be difficult for someone to admit you have a problem, so if you want to help you have to be trustworthy and won't make fun of them. If you have the right help plan, then the person will be less stressed.
   • It takes courage to speak up about your problem, so you should respond as follows: “First of all, thank you for letting me know, I know you have to take up the courage to say this. I will help you with all I can ”.

2. 

   Show empathy. Listening and understanding are important factors in developing a personal relationship. Emotional experiences of dealing with porn addiction force people to grow emotionally, which is a difficult process. You can share the problem by actively listening.
   • Put yourself in their shoes. Learn to empathize and accept them instead of judging. Find materials that teach you how to show compassion and empathy for others. This can be a bit difficult to do, but you should give it a try.
   • Treat them the way you would like to be treated by others. You have probably experienced many struggles in your life and knew what was useful to you then, and what wasn't.

3. 

   Help them identify emotional problems. When people have unpleasant thoughts or feelings they turn to watching porn to deal with those feelings. Porn films attract viewers' attention and repel emotions of frustration, depression, boredom, loneliness and stress. However, this is only a temporary solution and never a permanent response to such feelings.
   • Help the person recognize the signs of depression. Currently, there are many screening questionnaires online to identify depression. Many times, addicts have become depressed before getting into pornography, or having become depressed since they became addicted. Try asking them, "Is there anything that makes you bored?".
   • Use similar questions to find any signs of frustration, loneliness, depression, or other emotions they may be experiencing.
   • Virtual sex addiction and pornography are a condition in which addicts cannot resist certain behaviors. The illness presents unique challenges because addicts can keep their identities relatively secret, allowing for prolonged behavior. In addition, the unlimited access to the internet makes it very difficult to resist.
   • Let's say they're using porn to dispel unwanted emotions instead of dealing with them, if that's the case then you have to be the one for them to seek help, instead of using porn. . If you have to block the internet connection, do it.

4. 

   Congratulations on your achievements. Changing behavior is difficult, so if the person shows signs of improvement you must acknowledge their efforts. Start with small congratulations first, then bigger ones. If they share the good news about what they're doing, congratulate them.
   • For example, if you tell you that you haven't seen porn all morning, respond by saying, “That's great! You have really improved a lot, you definitely want that, right? Keep working hard ”.

5. 

   You can only help as much as you can. It's difficult to change your own behavior, but it's even more difficult to change the behavior of others because there are so many factors you cannot control. So you don't always have success when trying to help someone. Giving up control and just acting as a guide and support is a way to be successful.
   • You can provide strong support to the sick person, who is there when they need it.
   • There are times when you have to remind the sick person that "I am here for you, I am very sad to see you in such difficulties, I wish I could do more". This expression gives them more motivation to try.

6. 

   Take care of your own physical and mental health. When trying to help others, the person helping others also reap many benefits such as: more relaxed mind, less pain, even longer life. However, helping others is also a waste of work, so you need to take measures to keep your body and mind healthy. Focus on the following to keep your mental health in balance:
   • Get enough sleep to avoid exhaustion.
   • Eat healthy foods to maintain your health and energy against stress. The diet should contain fruits, vegetables, lean protein, complex carbohydrates, and fiber. Avoid caffeine, sugar, and foods rich in saturated fat.
   • Exercise regularly to cope with stress.
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Method 3 of 3: Establishing a Healthy Balance

1. 

   Continued support. You should continue to show interest by texting, calling, or visiting. Maintaining a positive attitude when interacting with them, but being honest and straightforward, can be tough when needed. They need to know that someone is ready to help them on their path to restoring a healthy lifestyle, and that includes you.
   • You must be kind and understand the person's problems. Treat others the way you would like to be treated.

2. 

   Encourage participation in social activities. Pornography addiction leads to an imbalance between time spent surfing the web and time spent in real life. If the person wishes to have more practical and practical relationships, then he or she must spend a balanced amount of time on person-to-person social relationships.
   • You should invite them to meetings to make new friends.They may not be comfortable at first, but you should always be there to provide support when needed.
   • Pornography causes a false view of human sexual relations, so addicts need to be re-educated about the interactions between men and women in reality. You must do your best to provide credible fact material to them.

3. 

   Plan healthy activities. Coordinate fun activities that are both beneficial to you and your partner. You have the right to have fun and if that helps broaden their understanding of the world, it is a boon.
   • Organize sports events, picnics and travel. If you are planning to experience something, invite them to join.

4. 

   Is the one who says reasoning. You must be the one who makes sure that the right fit always prevails. If the patient tries to negotiate with you about compliance with your commitment not to watch porn, you must argue for them to understand. For example, he might think it doesn't hurt to watch just a few minutes, but you know that once you start, you can't stop.
   • As a reminder of the consequences. You have to remind every time they see them walk out from a dark place, that all the effort they've been making will erode if they start watching the movie again. Start with a blunt voice to explain, “This is not a matter of shame or guilt, but the fact that you are and are still alive, you have to take responsibility for yourself and your people care about you ”.
   • Observe and discuss changes. If you notice a change in their behavior that makes you believe they have fallen, then you need to calmly face the problem. You should say, “I think you are really tired, is everything okay? Are you watching sex movies? If not, I am ready to help you, there is no reason to lie ”.

5. 

   There is a possibility of recurrence. There are times when you happen to find out or admit it by the person. Either way, you must focus on helping them forgive themselves, regain their spirits, and continue on the path of a depraved movie addiction. The more open and willing you are to help, the more secure they will feel to share their thoughts and feelings. They no longer feel they have to keep secrets that can quietly undermine their achievements.
   • Help addicts cope with the temptation of porn if a particularly difficult situation arises, by suggesting alternative activities to distract or attract their attention, for example playing the machine Fly the remote control or climb the mountain. Involving them into something completely foreign.
   • Encouraging them to forgive themselves every time they do it again is very important because every step backwards will disappoint the sick person greatly. This means that you continue to direct them towards your goals, for example you could say, “You may fail, but it is important to focus on the small steps to get back into detox. Try not to watch the movie for the next hour, then slowly increase your motivation over the hour as planned. You have to find your way back. Don't give up on yourself ”.
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Advice

• Be open and honest in every word.
• Use routine monitoring software, filtering software for desktops, laptops, and mobile phones.
• If you are a parent with a child addicted to sex movies, you should bring your child to see a counselor.
• If you know someone who is watching child pornography, whether it's your spouse or your kids, take them to a counselor.

Warning

• Addiction can ruin a person's life to the point where there is no chance for repair.