Content

• Steps
• Advice
• Warning

Most people cry, but women cry more often than men. When you come across a woman crying, whether it be your lover, friend or co-worker, there are things you can do to help her feel better. Comforting a crying person can strengthen your relationship with that person, and make you both feel more comfortable.

Steps

Method 1 of 2: Comfort your lover and best friend

1. 

   Assess situation. There are countless causes of women to cry, such as grief over someone's death, stress, illness, or even joy. Before you act, consider the situation and consider whether comforting the person right now is appropriate. Here are some situations in which you shouldn't be comforting your ex:
   • When you are also affected by a situation that makes her unhappy. If you are also shocked, bothered, or hurt by a situation that makes her cry, you are in the wrong position to help out. In this case, seek other support to help you and her cope with what's going on.
   • When she cries because of joy. Researchers are not really sure why a happy person can cry uncontrollably like someone who is scared or sad. When you're in this situation, congratulating a friend or partner is more appropriate than trying to calm her!
   • When she cried during a fight with you. Before you pamper her, you also need to calm down for a moment to make sure the argument doesn't go on again.

2. 

   
   
   Comfort her. Try to comfort the crying woman, unless you have a good reason not to. Ignoring a crying person can be quite detrimental to his emotional state. Your comforting act will help her calm and strengthen the relationship between you two.

3. 

   Become a good listener. This is familiar but never redundant advice. Crying is also an important form of communication, and listen to what she wants to say. Listen attentively, such as using words that show empathy for the crying person and avoiding interrupting when they are speaking. To be a good listener, you just need to let her express your emotions and be wholeheartedly with her.
   • Remember, however, that comforting isn't about trying to change someone else's feelings.
   • Be careful that the conversation doesn't focus on you as this is what is happening to her. Don't take it from your position. Even if she doesn't act like you, that doesn't mean she doesn't deserve comfort or that she deserves sadness.
   • Avoid saying things like "If I were you ...", "Have you tried ... yet?" or "When I met something like you, I did not overdo it."

4. 

   
   
   Don't try to lower your pain or tell her not to cry. Crying is also a good or positive act, even if it's caused by something painful. In addition, crying can ease the physical and emotional state of a person who is sad or stressed. Emotional suppression is a barrier that prevents emotional healing from taking place. Even if you feel uncomfortable, let her cry according to her emotional needs. Maybe she will feel better after that.
   • In general, you should avoid using commands, negative language, or compulsive language. Never use statements like "Don't cry," "You shouldn't be sad" or "It's not that bad".
   • It's not going to help her in assuming you know all the answers. Avoid saying what you think she should or shouldn't do to fix the problem. Don't assume you know everything she's going through and how to handle it. This only makes her feel rejected.
   • People who cry from a psychological illness such as anxiety or depression often feel worse than better after crying. If you think she is crying because of the psychological illness, comfort her and encourage her, but you should also advise her to see a doctor to get the necessary treatment.

5. 

   
   
   
   
   Recognize her sadness. Show her that you understand her pain by acknowledging it is legitimate and that you sympathize with it.
   • "Too bad ... I'm sorry that happened!"
   • "I understand that this is really painful."
   • "This sounds really disgruntled. I'm sorry for that."
   • "No wonder I'm so sad. Seems to be a difficult thing."
   • "I'm sorry that happened to you."

6. 

   
   
   Comfort with non-verbal gestures. A crying person can also more easily feel comforted when you use comforting gestures instead of words. Nodding, proper facial expressions, eye contact, and the way you lean toward her can help her recognize your worries and concerns.
   • Although handing over a tissue is sometimes understood as a caring gesture, it can also be a sign that you want the person to stop crying. Do this only if the crying person needs a tissue or appears to be looking for it.

7. 

   
   
   Consider appropriate physical contact. Some people feel comforted when someone touches them, but others feel anxious. Give her a hug if you know she can take the action. Over time, hugs even contribute to relieve stress. Other suitable actions include holding hands, clapping your shoulders, stroking your hair, or kissing your forehead.You will judge the situation based on her wishes and the limits of the relationship, and always listen to her requests. Keep some distance when she wants you to.
   • You can also observe her body language to see if she accepts your comforting action. Defensive body language like clenching her arms, crossed her arms and crossed her legs or avoiding eye contact means she wants you to keep some distance.

8. 

   Try not to avoid it. Many people feel uncomfortable around crying people. If you are, you will probably be in a hurry to say something that you think will be of help while not knowing what to say. Or, you will find a way out of the situation. This just made things worse for her. If you don't know what to do, say things like “I'm sorry to hear about you. What can I do to make you feel better? ”. At least it shows you care and makes her feel comforted.

9. 

   Offer to help instead of solving the problem. You will easily find yourself in a situation where you want to work things out in the way that you think is best. However, she may not want to help or need what you think she needs. You should avoid making the situation worse. Refrain from wanting to deal with the problem when it is what you should do is to help her overcome her grief.
   • Let her know that you are willing to help, but don't try to force her to accept your help. Sometimes the only help she needs is to just talk to someone. Often, listening is the best way to comfort others.
   • Ask open-ended questions to see if she needs help. Questions like "What can I do to help you?" or "I really want to help - what can I do to make things better?" These are some great words to help you understand how she wants your help.
   • Sometimes people who are upset are confused and do not know what to do to help them. In this case, try making a list of things you can do to make her feel better. For example, you might ask if she wants to go out for ice cream, or if she wants you to come meet at another time and prepare a movie for you both to watch. You need to pay attention to what suggestions she responded to positively.

10. 

    Help at the right time. While solving the problem isn't the first thing you should do, there are specific things you can do to ease her pain. If you can help her offload and seem like she wants you to, too, take the initiative in what you can do.
    • For example, if she is crying because of work stress, offer to help with chores so she can focus on work. If she cries over an argument with a friend, you can discuss ways to heal the relationship together.

11. 

    Proactively ask about her situation. A few days or weeks after you catch her crying, you can check in from time to time to make sure she is getting better. You don't have to ask too closely; Instead, asking her to have coffee, asking her how things are going, or making a little more phone calls are all helpful. Maybe she will be happy again soon, but she still needs more time to get over her sadness. Your care will be of great help to her.

12. 

    Take care of yourself. While empathy is important, it can also make you sad or depressed. Don't forget to take care of yourself and contact others when you need help! advertisement

Method 2 of 2: comfort an acquaintance or colleague

1. 

   Show empathy. Usually, many people cry only in front of loved ones - not strangers, co-workers, or acquaintances. If she is not close to you but still cries in front of you, she is probably very distressed and needs sympathy. It's important now to show empathy, instead of being upset, panicked, or scared.

2. 

   Let her cry. If she wants you around, let her cry. Don't make her stop crying or tell her to "cheer up". Crying is a natural, healthy act and can contribute to alleviating pain and stress.
   • Remember that crying at work doesn't have to be unprofessional. Most people cry at some point, so crying at work is inevitable.
   • Reassure her if she feels embarrassed, like saying "You can cry, it's okay" or "Crying is nothing to be embarrassed about - we are human!".

3. 

   Show her that you are ready to listen. Since she's not close to you, she probably won't want to tell you too much. Even so, you should still be willing to hear her talk. Ask questions and use open body language so she knows you're ready to listen when needed. For example, you could say:
   • “I know we are colleagues, but I can also be a friend if you need someone to talk to. Do you have something to tell me? "
   • "My office door is always open if you need to talk about something difficult."
   • “Can I help you with anything? Even if it's not a business, I'm willing to listen. ”

4. 

   Listen attentively. If she does decide to vent to you, listen attentively to show you care. You can do things like don't interrupt or give advice, just ask questions to make sure you understand what she said, make eye contact, and avoid distractions.

5. 

   Show empathy but still keep professional. You should act like a normal person and show concern, but don't go beyond the limit of a co-worker. After all, the colleague relationship must continue after this incident.
   • For example, you won't initiate a hug unless she wants you to. If you want to call her after hours to ask about her situation, ask her if she is comfortable with that.

6. 

   Offer to help with work related matters. Perhaps your colleague is crying because of work stress, or having a personal problem that affects her ability to focus on work. Either way, if you are in a position to provide professional help, help her find a solution.
   • For example, she needs to be on leave, or you will help her plan to handle difficult professional work.
   • Even so, take action when she needs your help. It is easy to get into a situation trying to solve the problem the way you think is best. However, she may not want the help or need the things you think she needs. You don't want to make the situation worse.
   • Avoid getting too deep into personal matters. Don't feel like you need to deal with a colleague's personal problem. Also, if the two of you aren't close, don't assume you know how to handle her problem. Comfort and listen, but focus on the work side only.
   • If you find you can't help her with the problem, apologize and say you can't help. If you know anyone who can help solve her problem, ask her to talk and seek help from that person.
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Advice

• After all, the most important thing you can do for a crying woman is to listen and empathize. Other gestures like preparing dinner, inviting coffee, taking her to the movies are all very kind, but your presence and concern are the most precious gift you can give that person. .
• Watching others cry can make many people feel uncomfortable, but work through the discomfort to give love and care to the person who needs it.
• Remember that crying isn't a problem, it's a communication that needs to be heard.

Warning

• Crying is healthy, but also a sign of a serious medical condition such as anxiety, fear, or depression. If she cries continuously and doesn't feel better, advise her to see a specialist.
• Comforting a crying person is a healthy, caring, positive act. However, sometimes this can also have negative effects. If you feel exhausted when comforting someone, take care of yourself by reaching out to people who can help.