Content

• To step
• Method 1 of 4: Stop loving someone you have a crush on
• Method 2 of 4: Stop loving your ex
• Method 3 of 4: Focus on yourself
• Method 4 of 4: A fresh start
• Tips
• Warnings

Quitting loving someone is tricky, whether you're trying to get over an ex or move on from an unrequited crush. The emotions can be overwhelming. But eventually will you get over it with the support of friends and family and a lot of self-love. Here are some helpful ideas on how to get on with your life.

To step

Method 1 of 4: Stop loving someone you have a crush on

1. Ask yourself if you really love this person. Sometimes it seems like you love someone - that handsome guy who works at Starbucks, your best friend's sister, someone you know over the Internet, or a favorite musician or movie star - but it's really just a fad.Yes, you do think about him / her all the time and imagine what it would be like to be with you exist, it is unlikely that you will feel true love.
   • True love is mutual, it requires you to spend time with the other and get to know him / her, including all flaws and details.
   • If you haven't experienced this yet, then you are more likely to love it idea of this person, then of the person himself.
   • If you can convince yourself that what you're feeling isn't true love - in the truest sense of the word - it's easier to move on.
2. Determine if there is hope for a relationship. The next thing to do is analyze the situation and find out if there is any possibility of a relationship between you. If there is a realistic opportunity - such as if it is a single person at work or school and you just haven't been able to muster the courage to approach him / her - nothing is lost yet and you should consider take the plunge and ask him / her out.
   • However, if the person you're in love with is your best friend's sister, your English teacher or let's say Leonardo DiCaprio, then you have to take your loss and move on. That's never going to happen.
   • This can be tough, but the sooner you accept the truth, the easier it will be to move on.
3. List all the reasons it will never work. It can be helpful to make a concrete list of reasons why a relationship between you and the other person can never work so you can remind yourself why you should stop.
   • It could be anything - from the fact that there is a 30 year age difference between the two of you, to the fact that he / she is gay, or that you never for real love someone who has a Celtic cross tattoo on their left upper arm.
   • Be very honest with yourself - your heart will thank you for it later. Tell yourself that he / she is not the nicest person and that he / she does not deserve you.
4. Focus on developing relationships with people who are available. Do yourself a favor and don't hang around with someone with whom it will never work out, and focus on someone who can get it right. Maybe you are so in love with the wrong one that you don't realize that your soul mate is right in front of you.
   • You know that friend who always wants to carry your books for you? Or that girl you look in your eyes like that and smile when she walks by? Rather focus on him / her.
   • Even if you don't develop a romantic relationship right away, it's always good to open up and meet new people.
5. Remind yourself that you deserve someone who loves you too. Unrequited love is painful and no one deserves it, especially someone as great as you. You deserve someone you adore, who thinks the sun shines more when you are around, who wants to spend the rest of his / her life with you. Forget that idiot who doesn't love you and don't settle for anything less than pure, unadulterated worship.
   • Try to use positive affirmations to remind yourself how great you are. Look in the mirror and repeat five times, "I'm a great person and I deserve to be loved by someone." That may feel very strange at first, but sooner or later it gets through to you.

Method 2 of 4: Stop loving your ex

1. Accept that it is over. When a relationship is over, don't deny the truth by clinging to unfounded hope. Don't try to convince yourself that he / she will take you back or change you. Accept that the relationship is over. The sooner you do that, the sooner you can continue.
2. Allow yourself to grieve. If you still love someone, the end of a relationship is a big loss. You need time to mourn the love you have lost.
   • Try to deal with this grief in a healthy way. Don't hold back your emotions or bottle up everything. It's okay to cry.
   • Try to vent your frustrations on a punching bag at the gym, or curl up on the couch with your favorite movie and a tub of ice cream. Do whatever it takes to feel good.
3. Break contact. It sounds harsh, but the best way to get over a broken heart is to cut all contact completely. If you keep in touch, it is more difficult to stop thinking about the other.
   • Get his / her number from your phone. Then the temptation to call or text is a lot smaller, especially if you feel vulnerable and can say things that you later regret.
   • Do not go to places where you can meet him / her. When you see him / her you can regain feelings and be overwhelmed with memories.
   • Break contact via social media. Unfriend him / her on Facebook and stop following him / her on Twitter. It doesn't have to be forever, but it can be helpful at first. It is very difficult to proceed when you become obsessed with status updates.
4. Throw away memories. Remove photos, clothing, books or music from the other person from your house. Destroy it if you think it will help calm your anger (and if you think you won't regret it later!). Put everything else in a box and put it somewhere you don't have to look at it. Out of sight out of mind.
5. Don't torture yourself. Don't worry about what went wrong or what you could have done differently. you cannot change the past, and punishing yourself for past (or imagined) mistakes will not improve. It may seem impossible, but don't try to torture yourself with "what if ...".
6. Talk to someone. Talking to a friend, family member, or therapist can take the burden off your shoulders. Cry, curse, scream, scream. Express every feeling and mean thought you've ever had about the other person - let it all out. It's amazingly good to express yourself.
   • Make sure you talk to someone you can trust, and talk somewhere where you have privacy. You don't want your innermost thoughts and feelings to reach your ex.
   • Don't overdo it. Most people will be sympathetic at first and will want to listen, but if you keep moping for weeks it will sound like the record will stick and people will lose their patience.
7. Give yourself time. It sounds like a cliché, but time really heals all wounds. Accept the fact that it will take you some time to be yourself again, but you will.
   • Keep a journal to describe how you feel from day to day. Then when you look back at what you wrote a few months ago, you will be amazed at how far you have come.
   • Don't pressure yourself to get over your ex on a certain date or to start dating new people. You will feel when you are ready for it.

Method 3 of 4: Focus on yourself

1. Sleep. One of the best ways to take care of yourself is to get enough sleep. The quality of your sleep largely determines how you feel during the day. Sleeping gives your brain time to process everything - you can wake up after a good night with a calmer feeling and a fresh perspective on life. That's why sleeping is so important if you want to get over someone.
   • If you have trouble falling asleep, give yourself half an hour to relax before going to bed. Take a bath or read a book. Drink hot chocolate or chamomile tea. Don't watch television or use electronics - this actually stimulates your brain instead of relaxing it.
   • After a good night's sleep you will feel refreshed and full of energy - ready for a new day. You also look fresher and more attractive, and you can concentrate better throughout the day.
2. Move. It's tempting to linger on the couch in self-pity when you want to get over someone, but the best thing to do is get some exercise. No matter what you do - run, dance, zumba, play football - it all has the same positive effect. Movement causes you to produce happiness hormones and you will look fantastic!
   • Just 30 minutes of exercise a few times a week produces the necessary endorphins to feel happy. Research has shown that exercise can even reduce the symptoms of clinical depression.
   • Try to exercise outside and you'll also get fresh air and vitamin D - you'll immediately feel better and more relaxed!
   • Exercise gives you more confidence when you need it most. Exercise quickly makes you feel more attractive and confident, regardless of your weight, height, gender, or age.
3. Meditate. Meditation can reduce stress and eliminate all unpleasant thoughts and feelings. Even meditating for ten minutes a day helps to reduce stress. Here are some tips for effective meditation:
   • Provide a calm and peaceful atmosphere. Find a place where you will not be disturbed. Turn off your phone. Choose music and lighting that relaxes you and makes you calm.
   • Get your stuff ready. A yoga mat or pillow can help you sit more comfortably while you meditate. A small fountain with running water can have a calming effect. Light some candles to get in the mood.
   • Wear comfortable clothes. You will find it harder to relax and forget the world around you if you are not feeling well.
   • Sit cross-legged. Keep your back as straight as possible, don't collapse.
   • Close your eyes and focus on your breathing. Breathe naturally, preferably through your nose.
   • Try to clear your mind completely and focus only on your breathing. Gradually, disturbing thoughts will dissolve and you will experience a sense of inner peace and relaxation.
4. Write. Writing can be very beneficial. By putting your worries and emotions on paper, you feel lighter and less burdened. Try to keep a diary or write your ex a letter (which you don't send) to process your emotions. Read the words and find out what's really bothering you - and what you want in a relationship in the future.
   • You can also write a letter to yourself about why the relationship didn't work out, regardless of who ended it (think not only about the good times, but also the worse ones).
   • If you are more creative, try to incorporate your thoughts and emotions into poems or songs. The best art comes from broken hearts.
5. Treat yourself. Now is the time to treat yourself. Just do what makes you happy. Organize a day out with friends to a sauna. Invite your friends to watch a game and have a few beers. Eat whatever you want. Get drunk. In short: have fun.

Method 4 of 4: A fresh start

1. Let go of the past. You need to give yourself time to grieve when a serious relationship is over, but when enough time has passed you should be ready to move on. Let go of the past and embrace it as a new beginning, a new chapter in your life. Remember, the best is yet to come!
2. Meet up with your friends. Now is the time to reconnect with your friends, if you may have neglected them when you were in a relationship. Call your best friends from grade school, your high school friend's club, or your roommate during your studies. Get in touch again and you'll soon be so busy that you'll wonder what you've actually been up to in those last few months.
3. Try something new. Now that you no longer keep thinking about the other person, you have more time for fun things. Now is the time to reinvent yourself and become the person you always wanted to be. Paint your hair red, learn Japanese, develop a six-pack. Take the opportunity to do something new and you might discover a hidden talent or passion that you didn't know existed.
4. Be glad you are single. Take advantage of your newly acquired emotional freedom and the endless possibilities you have as a single. Go out with friends, meet new people, and flirt shamelessly. Did your ex not like to dance? Storm the dance floor! Did he / she not appreciate your humor? Smile as much as you want! You soon have so much fun on your own that you forget why you actually wanted a relationship.
5. Make dates again. When enough time has passed and you have experienced all the benefits of being a single person, you may feel like dating again.
   • If you've just gotten out of a long relationship, take it easy, because if you jump right back into another relationship, things might go wrong. If you go on a date too soon, you start comparing your new sweetheart to your ex, and that's not fair to him / her.
   • Start the new relationship with hope and optimism - and who knows? Maybe this is "the one".

Tips

• Don't dwell on the other person (this is difficult!). But if it works, don't think about him / her and do something else
• Be confident about your decision.
• Change your appearance.

Warnings

• When you meditate, breathe deeply and slowly. If you breathe too quickly you can hyperventilate.