Content

• To step
• Part 1 of 4: Identifying your self-worth
• Part 2 of 4: Taking better care of yourself
• Part 3 of 4: Adopt a more positive lifestyle
• Part 4 of 4: Let go of perfectionism
• Tips
• Warnings

Our self-esteem is instilled in us at an early age. If you are constantly criticized by family, friends or society, that self-confidence is slowly broken down. Low self-esteem strips us of the confidence to make even the smallest decision. However, these feelings don't have to be permanent. Improving your self-esteem increases your confidence, and that is the first step to a happier, better life. Read on to learn how!

To step

Part 1 of 4: Identifying your self-worth

1. Know what self-esteem is. Self-esteem, or the way we think about ourselves, is an important aspect of our emotional well-being. A lot of self-esteem means that we accept and love ourselves the way we are, and are usually satisfied. Low self-esteem means we are not happy with the way we are.
   • People with low self-esteem have deeply held negative ideas about themselves and the kind of person they are. These ideas are often considered fact or truth about their identity.
   • If people are not treated for their low self-esteem, it can lead to lifelong problems, such as falling victim to an abusive relationship, always being self-aware, and so afraid of failure that they dare to set goals.
2. Assess your self-esteem. Knowing that you have low self-esteem is the first step to improving and overcoming it. You may have low self-esteem because you have a lot of negative thoughts about yourself. These thoughts can revolve around a certain trait, such as your weight or body image, or they can be in multiple areas, such as your life, career, and relationships.
   • If your inner voice or thoughts about yourself are mostly critical, you probably have little self-esteem.
   • If your inner voice is mostly positive and comforting, you have more self-esteem.
3. Listen to your inner voice. If you have thoughts about yourself, determine whether they are positive or negative. If you are having a hard time assessing this or detecting a pattern, write down those thoughts every day for a few weeks. Then look for patterns or tendencies.
   • The inner voice of someone with little self-esteem often manifests as one of the following characters: a bully, a generalist, a comparator, a doom thinker, or a mind reader. Each of these unique inner voices offends you, or assumes that others think badly of you.
   • The first step to building your confidence is to silence those negative inner voices. Your next goal is to replace them with more positive thoughts.
   • For example, your inner voice might say, "I didn't get that job I applied for, so I'll never get a job again and I'm worthless". You change that to "I'm disappointed I didn't get this job, but I've worked hard, so the right job has to be waiting somewhere; I just have to find it".
4. Investigate the cause of your low self-esteem. No one is born with little self-esteem; it usually arises in childhood because your needs are not being met, because you have received negative comments from others, or because something traumatic has happened. If you know the cause of your low self-esteem, you can overcome it.
   • If you discover a certain pattern when you judge your inner voice, try to trace these feelings back to the first memory you have of them.
   • For example, if your negativity is about your weight or your appearance, try to remember when your weight first made you feel uncomfortable; was it because of a particular comment?
5. Make it your goal to increase your self-esteem. The most important thing in developing your self-esteem is changing your negative, critical inner voice into a positive, encouraging one. Ultimately, you have to decide for yourself that you want to change the way you think about yourself. Setting yourself the goal of thinking more positively about yourself puts you on the right track to boost your confidence.
   • For example, your goal might be, "I start to think more positively about myself and talk to myself as a friend, not an enemy."

Part 2 of 4: Taking better care of yourself

1. List your positive qualities. Focus on things you like about yourself to remind you that there is more than just those negative things you think about yourself. Congratulate yourself for what you have achieved without qualifying it.
   • People with more self-esteem can accept that they are positive traits, even if they are not perfect.
   • Hang the list somewhere you see it often, such as your bathroom mirror, and look at it every day. You can add things to it as soon as your inner voice becomes more positive.
2. Keep a positive diary. Write down your achievements, what compliments people give you, and what good thoughts you have had about yourself. While the negative thoughts may not go away completely, focusing on the positive will improve your self-esteem.
   • A journal can be a powerful tool for keeping an eye on your inner dialogue and building your confidence.
   • Use your positive journal as a counterpart to your negative inner thoughts. For example, if you tend to insult yourself for not daring to express your opinion about something, make sure to write it down if you have given your opinion.
3. Use your journal to set goals. You can set yourself the goal of improving yourself without expecting to be perfect in every way. Your goals should be clear and specific, but there should be some leeway for imperfection.
   • Instead of "I will always express my opinion when people say something discriminatory or hateful", better phrase your goal as "I do my best to calmly contradict the ideas of people who discriminate and incite hatred."
   • Instead of “I'll never eat sugar again and lose 15 pounds”, your goal could be “I'm going to live a healthier life, make better food choices, and get more exercise”.
4. Forgive yourself if you are not perfect. Remember, like everyone else, you are human. You don't have to be perfect to have a lot of self-worth. If you can accept yourself as you are, even though you try to improve in certain areas, you will have a lot more confidence.
   • Create a mantra for yourself, such as "I'm a nice person, that's just the way it is".
   • For example, if you've been out of your mind and yelled at your child in the playground, you can say to yourself, "I'm not perfect, and I'm trying to learn to control my emotions. I apologize to my child. because I screamed and explain why I fell out like that. But I'm a nice person anyway, that's just the way it is ".
5. Seek help. If you feel that you cannot improve your self-esteem on your own, or if you are very upset looking for the causes of your low self-esteem, you can see a therapist to help you identify and deal with the causes .
   • Cognitive behavioral therapy is an approach that tackles automatic negative thoughts about yourself and teaches you to deal with your emotions in a healthy way.
   • More complex problems may require in-depth psychodynamic therapy to get to the root of the problem.
6. Volunteer. People feel better about themselves when they contribute to something that is not related to their own needs. Charity volunteering helps both the volunteer and those who receive the charity; a win-win situation!
   • Find an organization that serves a purpose that you are passionate about.
   • Volunteer with a friend or group of friends; then you help the organization (many hands make light work) and the whole experience becomes even more fun.

Part 3 of 4: Adopt a more positive lifestyle

1. Make time to take care of yourself. It can be difficult to make time for yourself, but doing things that make you feel relaxed and happy will increase your self-esteem and make you more productive both at home and at work.
   • Find a hobby that will make you feel better physically and mentally. Some people find that yoga, cycling, or running makes them calmer and more positive.
2. Surround yourself with positive people. If there are negative influences in your life that make you feel so bad about yourself, try to minimize the time you spend on them or try to cut it out of your life altogether. Allow people into your life who are positive and who support your positive thoughts about yourself.
   • Make sure your loved ones know that you are building your self-esteem so they can support you in that.
   • You can say something to close friends or family members like, "I'm working on improving my self-esteem. You can help me by letting me know if I say something negative about myself so that I can become more aware of it."
3. Eat healthy. Choose foods that are high in healthy nutrients and low in sugar and fat, as they will give you more energy, fewer sugar dips and generally make you healthier.
   • Avoid bad fats and choose healthy food that has been processed as little as possible.
   • Do not eat / drink candy bars, soft drinks, cakes, cookies and pastries, because this will give you a huge energy dip, headaches, illnesses, obesity and it has no nutritional value.
   • Eat more fruits, vegetables, lean meats, and legumes. Think of these foods as fuel for the whole day and an abundance of nutrients for your body, so you can keep your job and family running smoothly, protect your body from disease, and increase your life expectancy so you can enjoy your family longer.
4. Move more. Even if the gym is not an option for you, you can improve your health with a good walk. A little exercise gives you more energy, a better mood and a stronger immune system.
   • Many people find that a walk is refreshing and restorative, especially if they work indoors all day.
   • Even 10 minutes of exercise once or twice a day is very good for your health.
5. Pay attention to your personal hygiene and presentation. If you put some time and attention into your appearance by wearing clothes that make you feel confident and groomed, and taking good care of yourself on a daily basis, you will feel more at ease and gain self-esteem.

Part 4 of 4: Let go of perfectionism

1. Know what unattainable standards are. As with Picasso's paintings, perfectionism is just how you see it. Perfectionism is a subjective state and is often self-imposed.It's okay if you set the bar high for yourself, but often the standard is not realistic because things don't always go as planned in life. You're more likely to get frustrated when you can't live up to the perfect picture of yourself.
   • This is not necessarily a bad thing, as it is what motivates many people to get better and find better, more effective ways to do something.
2. Forgive yourself. You can avoid becoming unproductive because of this human tendency, by forgiving yourself when things don't go the way you want, and by supporting yourself more by being happy with your achievements and strengths so that you can fully enjoy who you are. right now.

Tips

• Surround yourself with people who care about you! People who don't care about you can't help you with your confidence.
• Don't try to impress others. Just be yourself, and people will automatically start to appreciate you.
• Tell yourself that you are confident and spontaneous, even if you don't feel that way. Your feelings and beliefs all come from your own thoughts, so if you believe that you are confident and spontaneous, then you are. Think and pretend you don't even know what it's like to have low self-esteem.
• Be assertive. Increasing your self-esteem is about getting what you want / need. Do things for yourself. Remember to help yourself before you can help others.
• You are who you are, and no one can change that. Be yourself and don't try to copy someone else.
• The most important thing is to believe in yourself. If you believe you can, you can.
• Your inner strength enables you to achieve the goals in your life. If you crash, get up and try again.
• Look in the mirror every day. Try to find something you like about yourself: your appearance, your achievements, what you've achieved.
• Don't let pictures in magazines or other media crush your self-confidence with their marketing tricks: those campaigns actually aim for fear and uncertainty by evoking those feelings. Resist their efforts with your inner confidence and be aware of the marketing strategies.
• Always talk positively about yourself. Tell yourself how nice you are or how good you look today. Always be naturally positive.

Warnings

• Constantly low self-esteem can be a sign of depression. Talk to your doctor and discuss possible options if you think this may be the case.