Dealing with an embarrassing moment

Content

To step
Method 1 of 3: Dealing with the incident
Method 2 of 3: Try to minimize the incident
Method 3 of 3: Address the underlying problem

When you are in an embarrassing situation, you may feel like the only person on Earth who feels that way. However, a feeling of shame is one of the most universal emotions that human beings experience. Every person on earth has to deal with it from time to time, and even for some animals the feeling is not strange. While we probably see a feeling of shame as purely negative because of the feelings it evokes in us, it actually has an important social function in helping us determine who to trust and with whom to build further relationships. Try to accept every embarrassing moment as much as possible without taking it too hard. Rather than isolating yourself from those around you, the ability to experience a sense of shame is one of the aspects of yourself that connects you most with others.

To step

Method 1 of 3: Dealing with the incident

Laugh at yourself. Recent research states that both laughter and humor are key when it comes to health in general. The easiest way to let go of the fear and worry that comes from shame is to simply laugh at yourself and the situation. This way, it is easier for bystanders to laugh with you instead of laughing at you.
- The fact that you experience a feeling of shame is a great way to connect with others and it is a feeling that everyone has dealt with at one time or another. If you are able to laugh at yourself, an embarrassing moment can be a great starting point for an interesting conversation or for making new friends.
- You can also try to put a funny twist on the situation.If you approach the situation with humor, it will seem less embarrassing and more like a little joke. For example, if you fall off your seat, you could say something like, "I always do my own stunts!"
Admit you were ashamed. When faced with an embarrassing moment, it's best to just accept the situation. You cannot go back in time, so there is little point in denying it. Acknowledge that you are embarrassed and, if necessary, also communicate it to bystanders if you have experienced an embarrassing moment. This may also give you the opportunity to initiate a conversation with others, as it is likely that they too have been through similar situations and may want to share them with you.
Explain what caused the embarrassing moment. There may be circumstances that result in embarrassing moments, but which are understandable and explainable. For example, if you've been calling someone by the wrong name all day, you may realize after some reflection that your thoughts were constantly with another person.
- In such a case, you could say something like, “I'm sorry I called you Jan a few times. My mind constantly drifts to a good friend of mine who is going through a difficult time, which is why I am not quite right with my thoughts. ”
Ask others to help you. You may have spilled coffee over some important papers during a meeting or you may have stumbled and dropped a stack of books on the dean's foot. Ask the other person to help you clean up or pick up the things you knocked over or dropped. This will immediately shift the focus from the embarrassing moment to the task at hand.

Method 2 of 3: Try to minimize the incident

Take a few deep breaths. When we have faced an embarrassing moment, feelings of fear will predominate in most people. You may get flushed in your face, have an increased heart rate and blood pressure, experience shortness of breath, and begin to sweat more heavily. To calm yourself down, take several deep breaths and then review the situation. This will help you with the physiological response you are experiencing (eg flushing). It will also prevent you from accidentally saying or doing something that could further add to the feeling of shame. Take a moment to calm yourself, then get back to business as usual.
Don't make a spectacle of yourself and the situation. The worst thing you can do when you've been dealing with an embarrassing moment is turn it into a big drama. When the embarrassing moment happens, try not to scream, yell, run away with tears in your eyes, or cry loudly in public. The bigger you make the drama at that moment, the more likely people will remember the incident. Don't forget that this is also a moment that will pass soon enough. When you respond to the situation in an appropriate and calm manner, it is likely that bystanders will quickly forget that anything ever happened.
Tell yourself that this moment in itself wasn't that embarrassing at all. You need to acknowledge that something unpleasant just happened to you. But keep in mind that it is only embarrassing when you tell yourself. If you quickly leave the moment behind and tell yourself it wasn't embarrassing, you'll be able to quickly shake off the feeling of shame.
- It is likely that you are much more self-critical than others. Psychologists argue that in cases of fear and shame, people tend to be overly concerned with themselves, severely overestimating the attention of bystanders.
- Keep this knowledge in mind when you are faced with an embarrassing moment, as at such a moment it is likely that the bystanders are paying more attention to themselves than to you.
Do something that distracts yourself. After dealing with an embarrassing moment, you could do something to distract yourself. For example, you could read a book, exercise, watch television, listen to music, etc. By focusing your attention on something else, you will no longer be preoccupied with the embarrassing moment in your head.
Learn from the embarrassing moment. So you had to deal with an enormous feeling of shame, but that is not a problem, see it as a learning moment and learn lessons from the incident. Did you stumble and fall to the ground right in front of the person you're secretly in love with? Then stop wearing high heels in the future. Did you pass out while giving a presentation? Then try to figure out how to calm yourself down before giving a presentation.

Method 3 of 3: Address the underlying problem

Reflect on the emotions you experience as a result of an embarrassing moment. Remember that you can learn which situations make you feel shame. Think about the situation you were in. Ask yourself, "What exactly made me feel ashamed?" It may not always simply be about the people who were in the area.
- For example, if you feel extremely embarrassed after failing in something you are normally very good at, you may have too high expectations of yourself. Whenever you are dealing with feelings of shame, you should reflect on the situation. Find out what your emotions can tell you about your expectations of yourself and of others in general.
Determine whether you may be dealing with an anxiety disorder. While the title of this article is about dealing with and letting go of embarrassing moments, some people have a lot to do with feelings of shame. This can even be a daily recurring phenomenon. If you feel that you are regularly dealing with embarrassing moments accompanied by feelings of shame without being in control, this could indicate an anxiety disorder. This is actually a type of anxiety disorder that appears to be closely linked to persistent feelings of shame. This disorder makes it very difficult for you to let go of embarrassing moments when they occur.
- If you feel like you can't simply shake off feelings of shame and are dealing with it fairly regularly, consider taking steps to treat your anxiety.
Enlist the help of a mental health professional. If you feel that there are underlying causes behind the feelings of shame that are stronger than usual, it is wise to talk to a therapist. This person can help you understand your emotions and find out the answer to why you feel that way. The therapist can also provide you with strategies that can help you reduce the intensity of the feelings of shame you are experiencing.
Practice mindfulness (sometimes called obedience), which is a form of meditation. If you can't stop thinking about an embarrassing moment, try meditation. Remember that the embarrassing moment is behind you. Try to focus on the present. Mindfulness is a form of meditation in which you become aware of your own thoughts and emotions in a non-reactive way. This can be a very helpful technique to keep the embarrassing moment out of your life.
- Sit still for 10 to 15 minutes and take a deep breath continuously. Concentrate fully on your breathing.
- Acknowledge every thought as it enters your mind. Identify the emotion you are experiencing. Say something to yourself like, "I'm dealing with a feeling of shame."
- Accept the emotion you are dealing with by saying the following to yourself, "I can accept the feelings of shame."
- Be aware of the fact that you are dealing with a temporary feeling. Say the following to yourself: “I am aware that this feeling is temporary. The feeling will diminish quickly. What do I need for myself right now? " Allow yourself space and validation for your feelings, but also recognize that your thoughts and reactions can slightly distort the reality of the situation.
- Return your attention and awareness to your breath. When additional thoughts are running through your mind, you can repeat the process of acknowledging and then release the thoughts.
- You could also search the internet for guided mindfulness meditation exercises.